how do i teach him to chew?

ok, my ds has been on fingerfoods now for about 3 months or so. The problem is, I have to cut everything up to very small pieces because if I don't, he will shove the whole thing in his mouth and swallow it without chewing it.. he has choked soo many times i have lost count (and I mean full on choking not just gagging). How can I teach him to chew. meal times are becomming stressful for me because I am constantly worried that he is going to choke and wondering if it will be the time when he won't be able to dislodge it and choke to death.! :(

What can I do? I give him toast and sandwiches but I hold onto them so he can bite bits off, its all good he can chew those bits, until I give it to him to hold and then he just puts it all in his mouth and tries to swallow it!

I give him teething rusks, he has those and chews them and sucks them, but when he gets a big chunk off, he won't chew it or spit it out, he just tries to swallow it and then chokes on it. I give him a biscuit, but i have to hold it, cause he will swallow any chunks without chewing.

I want food to be a fun experience for my ds not a time when mummy is constantly shoving her fingers in his mouth to get the piece of food out iykwim?

am I just being too paranoid? should i just let him hold onto these "big pieces" of food and feed him self to work it out, or should i just keep cutting everything up into small pieces?

i'm sorry for rambling on, but my boy is very independent and i'm sure he is sick of me constantly hovering over him when he is eating. I want it to be enjoyable for both of us. and I want to stop being so paranoid about EVERYTHING!

i should also mention that ds has only just got one bottom tooth and thats it.

Sirenz, sorry this is not advice but my DD does the same thing. I really love the idea of finger foods, but she seems to have big chunks in her mouth which sometimes stay there for a long time afterwards (i was shocked to find them while i was playing with her, she could have choked cos i didnt even know they were still there in the roof of her mouth, big chunks) She was storing them like a little chipmunk! :p
I was scared by that experience which has happened twice. I dont know if it is something that they will figure out on their own?

I don't know what you can do. I know that if I don't cut things up for Oskar he still quite often just shoves the whole lot into his mouth... so if I cut a sandwhich into 4 squares he will shove almost a whole square in if I don't watch and tell him to take bites or hold it for him. With bread though it does tend to stick to the roof of his mouth and he's only just started to let me help him get that out. I think it may be something which just takes time for them to learn. In the meantime just keep cutting it up, a lot less stressful ;)

What happens with big bits of squashy things (like banana or avocado)? At least they are harder to choke on...
Or things that really need to be chewed (like asparagus stalks or broccoli trees)?
With my DS, who is nearly 8 months, we make chewing faces and he imitates us. We share his food - so hopefully he gets the idea. We haven't tried giving him harder stuff yet though.

yes we share his food too and with banana, I was letting him bite some off my banana the other day and he got a big chunk off and choked on it cause he just tried to swallow it straightaway. He loves brocoli but i only give it to him extremely well cooked and small "trees".

we too make the chewing faces and he does imitate us, but he seems to forget about it soon enough.

he will be 11 months old in 2 days, maybe i'm just being impatient. :(

Are you sure you haven't got my grandson. He did the same for awhile until he got the idea. We used to sit with him and eat and chew, he got the idea eventually. It made meals a pain having to make sure everything was bite size but they get there and then he went the other way and took small bites of his sandwiches!!!

Sirenz, when you say he chokes what happens exactly?? I know it is scary but we have been giving ds whole foods from day dot & the first few times he swallowed bits that were too big for him & he gagged & eyes watered & brought it back up. Now he does it without making a sound but doesn't do it so often.
I do notice he is worse when he is tired & often when he is tired I have to cut the bits into chunks & put them in his mouth otherwise he just squishes the food. For us he 'got' the swallowing thing from eating milkarroroot biscuits cause it would brake off in chunks & he would bring it back up & he had to gum, at the time he didn't have any teeth, he now has 2 bottom teeth, you would be surprised how strong their gums are (not suggesting you give him raw carrot but YKWIM hopefully)
With bread, do you give him bread? is it white bread or seedy bread because strangely enough white bread can be worse cause it forms into a ball easier & can get stuck to the roof of the mouth easier where as seedy bread breaks down due to the seeds. I cut ds toast into finger size bits.
HTH

hi njd thanks for your reply.

when he chokes sometimes he just gags and thats ok, but usually he just full on chokes and I mean, unable to get it up, can't make a sound, can't cry, can't cough. I have to pick him and do the back thrusts (don't even know if i do it right, but obviously something is right cause the food dislodges) once it dislodges he cries and seems terrified cause he couldn't bring it up himself.

he has milk arrowroot biscuits, but i hold onto them while he eats and I must admit he is getting better at chewing those when big bits come off, but if i let him hold it he will bite half of it off and then swallow it.

we have rye bread (we don't eat white) and he is good with that usually, it never sticks to the roof of his mouth.

its just the chewing of large bits of food that he bites off that he can't get the hang of and I don't know how to teach him iykwim

O.k so I have been thinking about your little man & I have a few more questions if that is o.k cause like you said it does sound scary when he is choking....

o.k so does he choke on all the bigger chunks of food or just certain types? When you give him chunks of food how big is it approx?

I had the exact same issue with my DD2. I wanted to do the baby led weaning style but it just didn't work for us. I continued to give her food chopped up into little bite size pieces, but each meal I would give her a slightly bigger piece (a thin finger of something, for example) and just sit facing her, eating myself. It's good for them to see you biting off and chewing, you will notice they watch you pretty carefully. Also soft food like pikelets and veggie fritters is a bit easier to handle the whole biting thing to start with. I would steer clear of the harder biscuity type foods until he gets the hang of it, we had a "real choke" one day and the culprit was a biscuit. Scared the willies out of me.

With bananas, if you put your thumb in one end and push the banana splits into three finger-width bits. I'm still doing this for DD as otherwise she just crams too much in at once (enthusiastic eater LOL).

It might be a coincidence but she seemed to finally "get" the whole biting/chewing thing when her top teeth came through. It was a few months later than a lot of the bubs born in the same month so it might have something to do with it. Hang in there, your DS WILL get there! :)

hi,
we are doing BLW, a suggestiong, how about mixing the food that you chop up in with a bit of mash potato... plong the 'mush in front of him and let him grab amounts of this food.
once he masters feeding himself this, then move onto larger chunks of food. this might help.

MJ still has no teeth but manages to chew things.
I was going to ask the same question as you NJD
The other thing... how is his sitting balance? and where do you feed him? is he completly upright? i know that if MJ is slightly reclined like in a push chair or similar she is more likely to cough and gag.

how hard is the food that you are giving him? could you make things more sloppy... like really soft carrots and broccoli... the broccoli that i gave MJ to start with almost falls apart when she grabbed it

HTH :)

Ok, so the food he chokes on the most would be toast, sandwiches, & Bananas. I can cut all of these into strips (say, the size of his fingers) and he is good with that, but, for example, if i cut up a sandwich, how you would normally cut it up for your baby (bigger fingers or squares) he would choke on that because he would shove it all in his mouth, not chew on it and just try to swallow it whole.

he is good with chunks of potato, sweet potato, carrots, broccoli etc and I cook the hell out of them so they are really soft.

So i guess you could say, he can handle big chunks of very soft food like the veggies i'm cooking, but can't seem to get the hang of chewing on sandwiches, toast and banana etc (as bananas are slightly harder than the vegies he gets if that makse sense?)

his sitting balance is excellent, and he sits in his high chair or bumbo for meal times, completely upright.

should i just give him the bigger cut sandwiches and let him work it out? when he has pikelets (i make him blueberry ones without sugar) i cut those up into little peices, should i just give him a whole one to chew on and hope he doesn't choke to death? I just don't know if its me being totally paranoid and not giving him a chance or his there is something wrong with his chewing etc..

god i can ramble on! i hope it makes sense to you all. :)

Sirenz,
Just keep cutting then up in small pieces. I used to cut them in different shapes just for the fun of it. He will get the idea one day and then you will have trouble keeping up. My grandson went from things being cut up small, shoving in as much as could fit, and asking for the next mouthful, then a go slow, took forever to eat a sandwich, and now having a go at feeding himself. They get there in their own sweet time even though its a frustrating time for you. Hang in there and wait for the next stage to come along.:hug:

My baby girl had her first 4 chompers by 4 months so i guess that might have helped her to chew easier. As far as the larger pieces of food are concerned you just need to keep trying it & let him work it out for himself. My daughter will be 1 next week! & she loves to experiment with all types of foods. Almost everything she eats is fingers foods cause she wants to be miss independant & feed herself. Yes she gags on a bit of toast or bread every now & again (what baby doesn't!) & tries to shove a large chunk of banana in her mouth but that is all a part of the learning experience for babies. When i went from mashing the banana & spoon feeding it to her to allowing her to feed herself i broke off about a third of a banana & watched her eat it. At first she did what you are saying 'tried to shove the whole thing in her mouth' but after a couple of weeks of banana eating!! she has mastered chewing & sucking it. After all they are still babies & most of the banana is squished between her fingers as a little 'science experiment'. If you are really worried about it just let him have a go first & then break small bits off & pop it in his mouth. When my girl is tired she tends to make more of a mess - so i do just that pop it in her mouth while she plays with it in her hand! I also usually eat the other part of the banana in front of her so she sees what i am doing & plays 'copy cats!

I think he chews, but he doesn't "bite". My DS has a similar issue - he "bites", but he uses the back-most part of his jaw to do it - so if the original thing is too wide then he ends up with a very very full mouth. I would keep making fingers of things - and once he learns to use his new teeth to bite rather than his back gums he should be fine.

thanks everyone for your replies.

I have found over the last week he is getting much better and i'm giving him bigger chunks of food every day. He even managed a couple of slices of melon without choking or gagging, so thats a good sign.

I will keep at it and try to stop being so paranoid, which is hard for me cause i'm the QUEEN of paranoid when it comes to ds! lol

Easy to be paranoid after you've had a couple of choking incidents. Just remember though that you know what to do when that happens and on the plus side you'll never get slack about watching him while he's eating! ;) Good to hear he's making progress, I definitely noticed a huge improvement as Miss E went past the 12 mth mark.