What is wrong with me?

Hello and thanks for letting me join your wonderful community.
I googled for keywords 'miscarriage' and 'message board' and this was the first one that came up and I joined immediately. Then I was writing up this pretty long thread about my experience and when I pressed the submit button, I got logged out and lost the whole thing so I left it as that for about a couple of weeks but now I'm back :redface:
So this is officially my first thread/post. :)

I had miscarriage in late Sept/early October. I was having some bleeding (which I initially thought was my period) and it seemed abnormal and unusually painful so I ended up going to the ER and that's when I found out I was having a miscarriage. Although I've been with my husband for over 10 years, this was not a planned pregnancy, we were going to let it happen when/if it happens and with my irregular menstral cycle I had no idea I was actually pregnant until the night I went to the ER (and before going, I took a home pregnancy test and it did come back positive and I knew there was something wrong). I should have been better prepared and my pregnancy well planned, and maybe I could have done something to prevent my miscarriage. And also because I didn't even know I was pregnant, I'm not as devastated as I might have been had I known and started to really feel like I was going to become a mother, to know there was our baby growing inside of me. (So apologies in advance if I come across rather cold, self-centred or not as sad as I should be, I feel like I'm more physically traumatized than emotionally).

I don't think I was that far along, the BHCG level when I got tested at the ER was 60 but then I hadn't had my period for about a couple of months and my periods are irregular so I don't know.

I went back to my family doctor the next day after the night spent at ER to inform him of this and he's been monitoring my BHCG. My last blood test (which was hmm like maybe more than 2 weeks ago) showed that it had gone back down to 25. I was supposed to go back for another test as my doctor told me he'd like to see it go down to 10, but I've been quite busy with my parents visiting us from overseas and then we are going to be moving across the country for my husband's job etc and I haven't gone back to the lab for my blood test yet.

So now my questions. Even after a month and a half ~ almost 2 months, I'm still spotting here and there and I'm wondering how long it takes to physically recover from a miscarriage. I've read online on medical sites and things 2weeks to 1 month but I just don't know if my spotting is normal. The kind of bleeding varies, too and it starts every other week or so. I have like one week of no spotting and then I start right back again, one time it was bright red and other times, very light and brownish.

And today my spotting has begun once again, but this time, accompanied by very bad lower-back pain (extending to my tailbone and radiating upwards a little, too). I don't even know if it should be called spotting or discharge cuz it looks very light.

I'm kind of freaking out whether there is something else wrong with me (like cervical cancer...) because it seems like it's taking me so long to get back to normal and this backache is scarying me, it may be unrelated but it feels like the kind of backpain that you'd get when you get your period along with cramps and everything else. And for me, when I used to have heavy periods, my tailbone would always hurt so it makes me think this backpain is related to my miscarriage.

I asked my family doctor to refer me to a specialist/OB/GN but he was rather reluctant about it but I just want to make sure that I'm healthy and recovering well so that I can start trying again or at least start planning and discussing with my husband what we can do.

Oh and when I first joined this site, I didn't know it was Australian! and can you tell that I'm not? (from another common wealth country though ;) I hope it's ok). Where I live, it's rather difficult to see a specialist as there are long long waiting list so my doctor's excuse was that it may take about 6 months to actually get an appointment with a gyno and by the time I get to see her, my problem might be resolved. But then he assured me that if it became an emergency (e.g. if anything is abnormal or severe like bleeding and/or pains) he'd get me in quicker and he'd schedule me an ultrasound (I'd need to go to a hospital for this). Right now, I want a pap test and a ultrasound to make sure that I'm not sick with soomething else. I just hate not knowing what exactly is wrong with me, why am I still spotting? when will I get better? Is there anything else I should get checked for through my blood test?

I got examined years ago for Endo and PCOS for my irregular periods and I have neither. Again, I hate not knowing what exactly is wrong with my body.

I know I need to talk to my doctor and ask him these questions myself, but I'd appreciate it if anyone could share with me their experience. How long did your spotting last? Did you have cramps and other pains? Did you require any other tests other than BHCG blood analysis? How long did it take until you felt like you were back to your normal self and that you were healthy enough to try again? Are there any complications or after-effects of miscarriage?

HI Dunno,

SOrry to hear about your loss.

Aside from sharing my experience and highly recommending seeking advice from a different GP the only other thing I could suggest is going into the emergency dept at your closest hosptial.

my experience with m/c I bled heavily and had very painful cramping for 17 days then it stopped for a week. I though it was passed until it started again and I bled heavily for another week, then it stopped for a week until it started and again was heavy for a week until finally I passed a clot that I suspect was my little one. The bleeding stopped a day or so after that and that was it.

If your GP is not providing the care you feel you need then go elsewhere even if it means travelling further etc.

BTW where are you from?

Nae x

hi dunno,
sorry to hear about your loss:hug:
my miscarriage required a D&C so my situation is slightly different, but the similar none the less. i only spotted a few days after, but it took 91 days for my Af to arrive :o
(i am normally very regular). during that 91 days i litterally climbed the walls thinking something was wrong (or i was really UTD and all the tests were wrong :redface:) i had major nausea, tiedness, constapation, a UTI, tonsilitis, and about 3 colds :rolleyes:
what i am saying is that being preggers (even for a short time ) takes a lot out of a person, and how we recover depends on lots of different factors.
my advice listen to your body, if you need reassurance get a referral to a FS, have them look into your spotting and your cycles, so that by the time you are ready to TTC, you will be in tip top condition.
BTW nothing you did would have prevented the miscarriage.

Thank you so very much for your responses.

This is my first time miscarrying and it's been hell of a scary experience to say the least.
At the same time though I feel like I'm being such a wimp and I just need to toughen up. I don't really have anyone around me that I can talk to or that understands what I'm going through and I'm left feeling like nobody cares about me and/or I'm being hypochondriac thinking there is something wrong with me.


I went in for another blood test last week and my dr. called me back to tell me that everything (= ? I only got tested for BHCG and hemoglobin count...so it's not necessarily everything esp since I don't feel like everything is normal) is back to normal and I didn't need to go back for further testing. I guess I should feel reassured...

NaeNae, I'm in Canada and it's rather difficult to get referral to a specialist partly due to our health care system and also because of doctor/nurse shortage. This is why my GP was initially reluctant to refer me to a gyno cuz the wait itself might take about 6 months unless it's urgent. When I was being tested for PCOS/Endo, it took me a month to get an ultrasound appt at the hospital. (Is the Aussie health care like this? You, too, have universal health care like us, right?)

The spotting that started last week has just about ended now, it might have been my period by the looks and the feel of it but I don't know. I don't know if it's normal to have my cycle back this fast after m/c.

Right now I'm too scared to TTC, I don't know if I'll ever want to.

It would be nice to feel healthy once again. I think I'm ok now though, I just worry a lot cuz I don't know what's going on with my body. But this message board has been very helpful, reading about other people's experiences and seeing that there are individual differences, things that my doc never explained to me or told me etc.

Thanks guys for your replies. :) *hugs*

Sorry to hear about your loss. Have you had a blood test to check for low progesterone levels? I found a wonderful site with lots of stories about miscarriages and the women there all had low progesterone. Often they had had multiple miscarriages and it wasn't until they were put on progesterone suppositories that they were able to maintain a pregnancy.

I meant to add my last FET which was a BFN I knew there was a problem at 6dpt when I had bleeding. I asked my dr to give me a blood test for progesterone - it was way too low - they put me on progesterone suppositories but it was too late. I should have been on them before the FET took place. Anyway google low progesterone and read up on it. I may help.