Express feeding immediately after birth

Hi ladies

I am 8 weeks along with my first bub.

Since there's no names here I can say I was sexually abused as a child and for this reason I have psychological reasons why I do not want to breast feed. The entire process completely grosses me out, not because of my baby but because of what happened to me. But I dont want to feed my baby formula either.

So after the big event and it's time for baby's first meal, do hospitals/ birth centres etc allow you to express from word go? I dont want anyone poking around with my body as it is and if some nurse/midwife did what I have read and grabbed at my chest I would literally be like a rabbied dog and turn to bite :bluecheer:

Does anyone have any advice on if hospitals etc are supportive of wanting to feed baby naturally but only through a pump and bottle from WORD GO?

odd question I guess, but thanks anyway for reading :)

Bangs, I am so sorry that you have had to experience a trauma that would put you in this situation. My heart goes out to you. :hug:

I am sure you would find that your hospital would be supportive of your wishes; premature babies are express fed from the beginning etc, so it isn't exactly a big deal - however you would probably have to explain your situation.

FWIW (and I am not trying to pressure you, I have been sexually abused so I can empathise with where you are coming from) - is there any way you might be able to do the first few feeds from the breast? It would help incredibly with establishing your supply and make the expressing road just a little bit easier from the beginning.

I understand your discomfort with the idea of BFing (I was going to express full time as well) but it is something you could consider between now and then - you may be so high off post-birth hormones that BFing is okay with you after birth. However as I said, if you don't want to, you don't want to, end of story. No midwife should dispute with you, however, you may want to ensure that you have your husbands support because a midwife you see during your pregnancy may not necessarily attend the birth, and if you are not in a fit position to discuss it, then your husband may need to (IYKWIM).

Sorry I have rambled a little here, I really wish you the best with your pregnancy and good luck with your breastfeeding journey. There are several BB Mumma's who have exclusively express-fed for many months and they would be a great source of support to you.

You may also like to consider getting in touch with a lactation consultant prior to the birth as they will be able to give you information necessary for you to be prepared in terms of increasing milk supply etc.

i dont see why you cant express from the start, many people do! id make sure you let your care provider awear of your intention, write it in your birthplan as well. this way the midwives are awear of your situation. :hug:

I pumped from word go as my son had a medical condition.....

But at first you have such a small amount, it is usually hand expressed, and even after b/feeding 4 previous babies, the midwife had to hand express my breasts for me....
So I'm not sure how you will go honey....

All hossies SHOULD be supportive of expressing from word go, if you say thats what you want, then they will accomodate you...

Using a pump is very demanding, and can be quite painful and hard on your breasts and nipples, and the feeling can be very unpleasant, so not sure, again, how you will feel....

I am sory to hear of your past, and how it affects you possably feeding your baby... :comfort:

But you are doing the best thing by educating yourself, and giving it your all, good luck babe.... :D

you'll probably find that the hospital has the facilities to help you immensely with this.

My DD was in special care for 24 hours and couldnt be breastfed for breathing issues so i had to express the colostrum (with a syringe to catch it...there is not alot!). and then they provided a electric pump (it is best to ask about their hiring policy of one of these from your hospital) once the milk came in. it can be tough going at first as it is harder to get your milk to come in manually, but can be done.

I would highly recommend contacting a lactation consultant (like the Aus breastfeeding association) as they have some great tips on how to get things going. and i think they also do more long term hire of the pumps...

HTH.

Thank you for your BRILLIANT replies. Honeslty they might not seem like much, but just the few kind words and ideas have alleviated a lot of tension in my head!

I hadnt thought of putting a few chosen details in a birth plan.. that way the midwives, nurses etc would understand my hesitation with contact. I guess I am scared I will get some rough old chook who just goes the grope and of course then my basic instincts will just kick right in!! So the birth plan idea is fantastic.

I hadnt thought of how babies in care would be fed, I just assumed if mum couldnt feed then they would be given formula. So I am glad that expressing is obviously a very typical thing from word go.
The lactation consultant is a good idea as well. I hadnt thought of somthing like that either. I would ultimately like to wipe the slate clean and not think of BFing my baby as some disgusting unnatural act so maybe with some help I might be able to forget or at least move on from what happened with me and focus on having a great relationship with my own bundle.

Thank you so much guys. You helped a packet!

Also, a LC will help you in understanding what's going on with your milk (ie what to expect when the milk comes in, how to express and how to soothe and prevent blocked ducts etc etc).

good luck with it all, and maybe check out the breastfeeding and bottle feeding section on here for some more tips and support...

Bangs, sending you many hugs... came from a similar situation myself, and have just come out of the horrific SCN environment, and in the end couldn't cope with the pump and have my baby on formula full time. It's going to be stressful, but as you are going into it more prepared than I was, I think you will likely be more successful. However, I do warn that those first few days,if you need a midwife to help you hand express will be horrific. I remember one who must have just come back from a cigarette break... ugh! Please don't beat up on yourself if you do end up having to go with formula, and please try to talk to your partner about things before hand. Just a few things I've learned from recent experience.

BW

pumping is different than a baby feeding.. you can feed your baby without a midwife touching you.. i had some issues with my first and had all these midwives giving different advice and very hands on (which teaches you nothing at all)
I have no idea what you went thru (nor is it my business) I would say leave all possiblities open.. bfing, expressing or formula in the end its what works for you two! I think everyone is different but i find the biggest thing for the let down whether pumping or bfing is relaxing! I cannot let down with the slightest feeling of being tense or nerves! Formula is not the devil, dont beat yourself up..

i also just want to kindly add that i cant see any reason why a midwife would need to help you with the breast pump so its a safe no hands option i reckon.. but more importantly look into pumps, ask around bout what people thought.. the hospital probably have their own, might be worth asking bout too.. something to bring up at a midwife consult and make sure they write it down in your hospital notes (as sometimes birth plans are forgotten, not read etc..) Also might be worth looking into a lactation consultant, they are absolutely awesome! :) (best help i got ever)

you can also relax knowing that if all is well you can leave the hospital shortly after birth.. you might feel like bfing at home rather than the hospital.

also another point.. do not underestimate the power of vagueness that comes with pregnancy, during labour and after giving birth :)

I sincerely wish you all the best!!!