Childcare.......... I just cant do it

Its so heartbreaking. My 6 month old DD will cry as soon as I leave..... even if I leave her at home with her dad she will cry the whole time I am gone.

I know every parent goes through it but I just cant do it. I see her and want to make up for lost time, I want to sleep next to her coz I havent seen her all day, I want to hug her till she pops.

I walked in today and she was screaming I could hear her from down the hall. As soon as I picked her up she stopped and smiled at me.

I dont think either of us are ready and when I asked DP about me doing family day care he thought it was a really bad idea and asked when would I ever go back to work and I cant possibly want to do that for the rest of my life. Then he got angry when I said he didnt understand. If it means I can stay with DD Ill do it, maybe I will absolutely love it and want to do it forever, maybe it will just get me by until she is 2 and old enough to play with the other kids. Either way I cant get through to him that IT IS WORK. It is money coming in still and it is the opportunity to learn, play and possibly adore what I am doing rather then feeling forced back into a workforce that although I am really good at, I dont want to do.

Im sorry I just needed to vent to people who understood. I cant do it for much longer, I cant walk away from her when she obviously needs me and to be honest, I think I need her too.

Yeah I getcha, I really do.
Ask your Dp who he thinks is the best to care for her......or that I'll come and hit him with a frypan:lol:

Men like spreadsheets.

Maybe point out how much you're earning (take-home, not pre-tax) and how much childcare costs. Then have a couple of mums willing to let you have their children for FDC and point out how much you'd earn for that. You can go back to "work" when your child is at school IF you need to because FDC may still earn more when you take into account funding for holiday care and clubs.

Do this as a spreadsheet so he sees the cold, hard figures. That's what worked for us. Both in me realising we both have to work to survive and DH realising that we can have me re-train for a career that I'll enjoy and give me time with DS beyond just the babydom.

I agree with the others - she isn't ready and neither are you! There is no rush, she is only 6 months old after all. I put Caden into FDC at 10 months and it took a bit for him to get used to it, he was fine after a few weeks and even better when I went back to work 3 days a week. FDC is great and such a wonderful service. Perhaps you could look at getting bub into one, rather than starting your own? That way she might like it better than daycare.

Or the spreadsheet idea would work. I think it depends on your career aspirations.

I really felt horrible with the idea of Caden going into DC at 6 months, but by 10 months he was more ready, and so was I.

Good luck hun,