Major sleep and eating issues 20mth old son DESPERATE

Hi everyone,

My son has never been a good sleeper. He's had patches of sleeping through, and patches of waking once or twice, which is fine, I can handle that. He is currently waking up in excess of 4 times a night, sometimes hourly, asking for "more" which means milk/bottle.

He has a bottle before bed, and a bottle to go down for a nap at daycare. He only drinks half and is passed out for a good 3 hours at daycare as he is so wrecked from being up so often during the night. He won't eat anything except chocolate, chips and crap, unless I sit and feed it to him one by one, and only then he eats pasta or peas.

He also has trouble going down at night, I have to lay with him while he drinks his bottle, taking around 20-30 minutes until he passes out, but he will be awake again in 2 or 3 hours, undoubtedly.

To add more chaos to the mix, my partner has a 3 year old daughter, and both Blake and her sleep in the same room, so trying to change things is so difficult, if I let him cry it will wake her etc etc.

I am at breaking point as it's putting major strain on me (I have PND) and my relationship. I'm finding it hard to enjoy spending time with Blake because he is so cranky all the time and quite destructive, all due to lack of nutrition and sleep I'd assume.

Help! Are there any professionals out there also? I'll pay whatever it takes to get a good night's sleep for my family.

Ashlee, i have no answers but i just wanted to give you a big hug as i know what it's like to be sleep deprived. Maybe you could try talking to your gp who may be able to recommend something to help?
Take care of yourself
xxx

Ashlee - big :hug:, it sounds like you're having a tough time. I second the idea of going to a GP to talk about your options. I'd maybe be focussing on what you could do to improve his diet, because this is quite possibly a factor in his sleeping issues, and I'd be asking the GP for a referral to a nutritionist/dietician that specialises in kids, rather than trying to tackle it on your own. It's not the easiest thing to fix, because it takes discipline & strength on your side to keep offering the right stuff rather than the easy stuff that you know he'll eat, and harder again if your SDD also only eats a chips & chocolate diet, but the benefits would be enormous.

Thanks for the support guys, I was going to give up on BB, just because I don't post regularly anymore doesn't mean I require less help!!

Doctors ignore me when I say he doesn't sleep or eat...it's just a phase is all I get, but for 21 months this phase has been going on. He has had grommets in and tonsils out for recurrent ear infections and sleep apnoea, but these didn't help the situation and the grommets came out early.

He has been diagnosed with sever asthma and is on a nebuliser at least 4 times a day now. Hopefully this may help.

I've also taken the milk bottles out at night and replaced them with water...night 3 and he woke twice, a third time cos he needed a nappy change (he has diarroeah from the ventolin), so thereis slight improvement.

Thanks again guys, really appreciate it.

:hug: It sounds really tough on you. I'm glad to hear you've had success with switching the milk with water! Do you have a MCHN you could talk to? Maybe she could suggest some things you could try or even tell you where to go for advice?

I hope things continue to improve :hug:

:hug:
hang in there ashlee! I think you need more help than just "its a phase", drs really annoy me sometimes...
anyway - you asked for some advice so I'll give you my honest opinions ;)

firstly I think you need to stop letting him have the chocolate/chips/crap completely, for a little while at least - I know if my DD1 (almost 2) has chocolate etc it ruins her appetite for ANYTHING else.
There are lots of yummy things that will also be good for him - yoghurt, fruit - even a jam sandwich! If you need to help him eat it for the first few days so be it!
One thing that really helps DD1 to finish her meals is our "5 finger" trick - you put your hand up, and for every mouthful she eats she gets to push a finger down, and it will make a funny noise (usually an animal noise, or raspberry etc...!) - make mealtimes fun. It takes a bit of effort, but she is a great eater!
Also I think 3hrs might be too long for him to sleep in the day - see if daycare can limit his sleep to an hr. it may take a while but I think his night time sleeping will improve after that (worked for us anyway!)
Hope that helps darl, hang in there :hug:

My now 20 month old DS was a shocking sleeper. It got to the point when he was 14 months that I couldn't get him to go to sleep AT ALL unless I was lying with him and he was playing with my hair and even then it took forever. I was going out of my mind.

We spent a week at a sleep school in Melbourne and it changed my life. He now sleeps 12 hours at night and has a 2 hour nap during the day. While we were there I met a mother whose 13 month old would only sleep if she had a bottle, six times a night! After two nights she was going to sleep without the bottle and sleeping through. It was like a miracle and they didn't use controlled crying.

I don't know if there is a similar place where you live but if there is give them a call and be totally honest about how much it is affecting you. The waiting lists are long but they do prioritise.