Your thoughts on TTC #2 (or 3, 4 +)

This is a bit selfish I know, but I can't get the thought of trying for number two out of my head. Maybe because DS is coming up 1, and two mothers in my mother's group are UTD already.

I know that there is one lovely LTTTCer who is just doing an FET now and I kind of wish i was too!!

To be honest I'd love to be conceiving number two baby now, but there's a hitch...DS is still bf. And the FS has said no way to an FET while still bf. I understand why, but it's been so hard to ween DS, and he's still so little. It seems mean to stop feeding him. I wish he'd just take a bottle. DH says go cold turkey on him, but I could never do that!

I've got it in my head that the frosties aren't going to be successful, so i want to get started as soon as possible. I know I would feel differently if we weren't so fortunate to have frosties - contemplating a third full stim cycle right now would be different.

Anyway, I guess I am curious about those of you who are LTTTC and when you are thinking of trying again, and what your thoughts and feelings are.

Jo

I know exactly what you mean! I haven't even asked about FET while bfing or anything, but the thought of 'cutting him off' prematurely just to try and get pg seems so selfish. And I do really enjoy bfing, so there's a part of me that doesn't want to stop either. That said, I think your little boy is a lot closer to weaning than mine (with his 8-10 feeds per day!).
If I'm entirely honest with myself I have to admit that I'm holding on to an irrational hope that I might just get pregnant by accident. It would be so nice if it could just happen like that. Deep down I know it's highly unlikely, but I still cling to this as a way to avoid the issue of weaning and returning to IVF for now. Even though I also fear that it'll take years to get pg again...
Not sure if that makes sense at all.

Hey my sweets! I dont know what to say - it is a hard choice!

They way i look at it and it may be completly wrong but a) dont want to wean L as then he really is growing up! and b)not wanting to delay starting AC again only to have to wait so long as you already have?

I would be torn between too, let me know if you want a chat?

Hmmm wonder who you were referring to in your post Lenny??? lol

It is a tricky one isnt it? I worried about it from when Celeste was around 6months with wanting to try again but BF. She weaned herself at 8.5months which I found really emotional and hated but that was the only reason we have started again.

Also, I think another reason we have been willing to go into it already is that we have frosties. If we were going straight into a fully stim ICSI cycle with all the hassles of trips to adelaide, early bloods, EPU, the hassle of drugs and the emotions I think I might have wanted to wait.

I am really in two minds about it all even now. I feel guilty about taking so much emotional energy away from Celeste and enjoying her time now. I am spending so much time and energy on the "what ifs" again. I dont wnat her to be an only child if I can help it but if it is to be that way then why am I going through the crap involved and having her live with the stress involved in the process?

Sorry, I have been absolutely no help at all..... I guess what I'm gettting at is:

Enjoy the here and now. You have waited for this for a long time and deserve to enjoy every minute of it.

Love your BF while you have it and are enjoying it as it is really for a very short time.

Use this time to be ready for when you are able to get on with things. When the time comes you will be super ready and excited about it.

It is usual with planned natural conception to wait till the older child is turning 1ish. Most siblings are at least 20months apart so you wont be that far behind the "norm".

Ah, I'll stop now, I'm rambling.
Sazz

Hi girls I had this exact dilema 2 years ago I was bf my IVF princess and had 1 frostie left. I was concerned it would take us as long to concieve #2 as it did 1 and didn't want a big gap. I ended up deciding on a date and I hate to say it came down to $ I decided to do FET before the next storage fee would have been due (dd1would have been 10months then). As it turned out when DD1 was 5.5 months old I ran out of milk she actually started losing weight so the decision was made for me. I went back for FET when DD1 was 8months and our only frostie took and DD2 is now 9 months old.

Not sure if that helped but wanted to share my experience xox

Hi
I saw my FS on Thursday and am on OCP ready to start a full stim IVF cycle. I am starting injections in a few weeks and need to have my 6 month old weaned by then. Hence I started weaning on thursday. I have severe endometriosis and really need to have my babies (hopefully) close together as my endo is very aggressive. I also think i would have chosen to have my children close together even if I was blessed with normal fertility. I have dropped down from 5 breastfeeds a day to only 2 breastfeeds today. I had problems with sore BBs for the first 3 days but they feel ok today. From day 2 of weaning I have been feeling so sad about weaning. I feel like I am grieving. I feel like my baby is growing up too quickly. I feel like he won't need me anymore once I stop BFing. I feel upset that I have to make this choice. If I didn't have to choose between breastfeeding longer and having another child I think I would feed until my baby weaned himself. I feel a bit cheated that I can't do things the 'normal' way - it is now cheating me of breastfeeding for longer. I never thought I would feel that way about BFing and I used to think that I would be happy even if I only BF for 3 months. I don't think I realised that it is about more than just the milk - it is such a bonding experience. Luckily my baby is coping with it much better than I am. He is not fussing over the bottle (although he only just worked out how to suck it properly today! He hasn't really had a bottle before this!). I think the hormones due to the weaning and the OCP which I am not good on at the best of times are a lot of what is playing havoc with my emotions.

I need to remind myself that I have given my baby and myself 6 months of BFing and he has really thrived on it. I also need to remember I really really want to have another child and focus on that. Thankfully last time I didn't have any emotional side effects from the injections so hopefully it will be the same again. Of course I experienced all the stress and anxiety that are normal with AC but I didn't turn into the ***** from hell I have been known to become with PMT!

So sorry for ranting!

Hi jbub,
I share a lot of your feelings. It sometimes seems unfair that i have to make the choice. BF had just become so easy and DS seemed to really need it.
But I am actually feeling a lot better about all now. DS is nearly 12 months and although he's not the biggest of bubs, he's fine. I will begin to try to wean him again very soon. He and I have had a good 12 months and i am grateful that I have some little icy-bubs to try with before i have to throw myself into a full stim.
Today I am just feeling thankful that I could even bf for 12 months and that I have my one beautiful child.

Good luck with the stim cycle - it's rough, but hopefully you get a BFP really soon.
:hug:

Yeah, it's not fair. Sounds like you're taking a good view on things jbub. Hope your cycle goes well.
Glad you're feeling good about it all Lenny. Hope very much to see another pg announcemnet from you soon - in say, the next 6 months or so...?:)