Toilet Training - HELP!

I'm sorry, this is long, but...

...HELP!!!

Saturday just gone, we started toilet training DD (turned 2 last month). We decided to start because DD took her own pants and nappy off and was getting her potty out of the bathroom. So Sunday I put DD in a pair of undies as soon as she got up and took her to the toilet every 60-90 minutes. We had a couple of successful wees on the loo and just 1 accident all day. She even asked to go to the toilet when we were at the shops.

The second day we had 3 accidents and 1 success on the loo (although she was happy to sit on loo most of the time). DD told me when she had an accident.

The third day was similar to second.

4th day was at child care. I rang them the day prior to discuss what we were doing and they were happy to do what we were doing at home i.e. undies all day except sleep time and pull ups when in the car (normal nappy at sleep time). When I picked her up, she had had 3 accidents but they were still optimisitc. DD hadn't told them she was wet when she had an accident. They told me this was likely to be because there was too much to hold her attention and she just wasn't focused on her accident.

5th day (today)... same as yesterday. Except I'm getting mixed messages from CC. They rang DH at work to tell him DD had fallen and hit her face. They also said DD had happily been sitting on loo. No mention of accidents. But a different girl (DD has just moved up a room and the girl from the new room had left the message with DH where as her old carer was there when I arrived tonight) told me they don't think this is working. They don't think DD is ready for undies at child care. She told me that DD asked for a nappy during the day (at home she has a tanty when we pull out a nappy). Without actually saying the words, I was being told they aren't happy to support us with undies at CC. I voiced concern at giving up so early and at having one rule for CC and another for home - I don't want to confuse DD. They agreed about needing to have a consistent message. They also suggested we use pull ups at childcare instead of undies...

Now, here's where I need help because I don't know what to do. DD's child care provides all nappies for during the day except the one she comes home in and goes there in. I can't really afford to provide pull ups for them (they don't supply them) on top of her fees (it would be different if we were at home). I do use pull ups for DD if we're going somewhere I'm not sure about toilet access or when she's in the car.

I suggested perhaps we put undies on DD under her nappy so she feels when she is wet and they still take her to the toilet every 60 - 90 minutes. But is this taking a step back for her psychologically? Because she is wearing a nappy...

Do I give in and put her back in nappies all the time?

Do I persevere and keep going the way we're going?

I'm really at a loss and don't know what to do. I don't want to undo what we've done and I don't want to make it harder for her...especially down the track. please help!!!

MG

No, I wouldn't put her in pull ups or nappies at child care. If she's happily going to the toilet both at home and cc there shouldn't be an issue. It just sounds ot me as though the cc workers want things to be made easy for them.

When I was toilet training DS last year, we went through the same thing - went to the toilet at home but got to cc and had accidents. He then started having accidents at home. DS was starting to get really ditressed by this and asked for a nappy. DH and I decided he just wasnt ready for TT so we did put him back in nappies. 2 months later we tried again and he TT'd so well, hardly had an accident, used the toilet for wees and poos and 7 months down the track at 3 1/2 years old is TT at night too.

If I was you, I would put her back in nappies and in say 1 -2 months time, try her again. Even if she takes her nappy off to use the toilet, go with it beacause it is still part of her learning.

There is no rush to TT and it wont happen when you want it to. Give her praise when she uses the potty/toilet and then pop a nappy back on. It will affect her more if she keeps wetting herself than it would if you put her back in nappies.

thanks girls.

I feel the same as you Tinkerbell and it is discouraging.

Ubba - DH and I have (after much discussion) decided to send pull ups tomorrow and Monday and continue with undies at home and reassess Tuesday. If no improvement, we'll go back to nappies and try again in a month. I'm hoping it is just getting used to it at CC...

Same thing happened to me, CC were just "inconvenienced" by the accidents, but it's all a part of learning. I perservered and practically made them keep up with the jocks, because that was my routine at home and that is what they are supposed to provide whilst the children are there.

DS is toilet trained now at 23 months and has been for a few months (except overnight but he is only doing one wee in a nappy now so not too far off).

I would supply underwear - you will know if she has been in nappies or not as she is obviously communicating well. You have to push for what you want!!