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I have a 10 year old DD who is having issues at school. Normal girly things I guess, lots of gossiping, ganging up on each other. She is at both ends as alot of them are, so one day she'll be gossiping, the next they ditch her and gossip about her etc. anyway, Im looking for a school holiday course or afternoon courses to help her be more assertive, but less bossy. does anyone know of anything, we live in the Syd North area.
thanks xo
My sister has been through this with my neice who is now 12. It is getting better. I cant reccomend any courses or anything. The only thing that helped was talking to my neice alot and helping her with ways to combat it nicley. When it got real bad, my sis would let her have a day off from school and spend the day with her talking about it and just giving her some "away" time.
My almost 5 year old is having the same issues with neighbours girls who are a bit older. I try to help her, but I decided to send her to a martial arts class where she can build her self esteem by being more confident with her own body and move up levels etc so she can see herself improve. Its based for kids with OT issues like sensory integration whatever, but they have different aged classes. If you call Kids OT in Frenchs Forest and ask for info about a martial arts class they can give you the number to phone.
A sport/activity outside school would probably do the same thing, build up her confidence as she develops a new skill. Friendships outside school are really important - esp if they do the gang up thing. It occasionally happened to my DD, (little bossy boots) and I know it took the heat off for her as she had plenty of other friends to hang out with until the cycle started again (anything from 15 mins to 2 days).
Peers are the ones that tend to modify behaviours etc, if she is a bossy boots for eg, she will learn that people don't like it all the time and its ok to share the spotlight etc. - it won't just be because Jane Smith doesn't like her - feel me? A structured activity (dancing, sport etc) gives everyone a chance to shine and is good for discipline too.
DD16 did a 'course' in Yr 7 called Girls With Attitude that was run by a local agency - it really helped boost self esteem and self expression.
One thing about primary school girls - AAHH they are so catty sometimes. They break into and out of groups, they swear hatred and allegiance within the same week, its hard sometimes but I think its best to stay out of it cos they sort them selves out eventually. Giving extra confidence and empathy is always good though.
Good luck finding something that suits!
If you ask at North Sydney Youth Centre, they will have a list of all the different things that are in the area and running over the school holidays.
There is a few programs out there specifically (sp) designed for young girls.
Also, have a look into programs run by Smith Family. I know they run some programs.
If i see any other programs come across my desk i will come back and post again.
Hugs
Xx
I did a program in a high school a few years ago called "Shine" its a self esteem course, but we did it with 12-13 year olds.
I was going to say Martial Arts as well, my nephew goes to build up his self esteem and it's really worked :)
Thank you , they are all great ideas! I will ring Nth Syd council!
DD does actually do dance. She's quite good and this year has started an extension class as well as another local one that she had to audition for. Only prob is two of the girls from her school are in it and she clashes with one. The mother always tells me what my DD says (eg whispers and leaves her DD out) but fails to recognise her DD is the same. Her DD even said to my DD once that my DD was not a dancer... she wasnt' as good as her. I just dont feel the need to dob like the other mother obviously does.
Anyway, I did think it would be good for self esteem, and do still think that, so we'll see how we go. Also my SIL is 11 (can you believe it) and she's a great dancer, so there's quite a bit of competition. MIL is very biased about her daughter and I feel alot of DD's low self esteeem could come from this reason.
Ah the joys, girls were delightful when small, I just forgot that they grow up!! Thank goodness number 3 is a boy, think I'll need it by the time he's a teen!!