Do you think your mind has a lot to do with going into labour?

Howdy :D

Just wanting to ramble off some random thoughts, cos I'm sure Jess is sick of me talking about it on facebook.. lol

I have thoughts that the reason why I didn't go into labour with Miss M was because of the pressure that surrounded me at the time, from friends, family etc - and negative influences as well (eg friends saying, oh you won't go through with it, you wouldn't be able to handle it, you'll be begging for another section blah blah blah) so I really think that stalled any chance I had of being mentally prepared and actually "allowing" myself to go into labour.

PLUS - I had thoughts in the back of my head at the time that I would go overdue - because my mum went overdue with all us kids (3 weeks over with my brother, 2 weeks with my sister and was induced on due date with me because they didn't want to let her go over again) so it was already planted in my head that I would go over.

What do other people think? Is that enough "baggage" to stall labour from happening?

So here I was thinking, oh yeah, I'll go overdue each pregnancy because my mum did - and it only just occurred to me the other day - I was around 37 weeks pregnant with DS and I started losing my plug in small amounts. So... maybe I'm not like my mum and I can do this? I had DS by elective c/section at 39 +1 because of a few reasons, but mainly because I didn't think I was capable of giving birth naturally (few reasons that I won't go into). So maybe because I started losing my plug at 37 weeks with him, its possible that I can actually go into labour on my own this time? Especially because I'm planning on the RLT, EPO and acupuncture/acupressure stuff. I tried acupuncture with Miss M but I don't think it actually had any effect because I was just too... stressed. But maybe if I hadn't of been in the position I was for my first pregnancy, maybe I would have gone into labour on my own eventually.

Oh I dunno - just random thoughts chucked out there. Nobody has to reply, its pretty disjointed thinking.. LOL

OMG sweetheart... yes, yes and YES!! Completely. I'll have a chat to you about some things ;) xoxo

I think your mentality can make a huge difference, if you keep telling yourself you can't then you won't. I don't know how into visualising you are but try to imagine yourself (when time comes) going into labour and birthing your baby your way.

My old dance teacher use to make us visualise our successes, how we danced each routine etc so I definately think it makes a difference.

Nae x

definently

i also think you can put yourself in labour
im sure i did this with tay i was so scared of going over i kept telling myself i would have her by her due date and kept having labour on and off for 2 weeks id go in then when i got to the hospital i got scared and thought nope not ready and it eased off and stopped naturally every time lol

ended up being induced because she was getting cranky in there lol

but yes i agree your mental perception and position has alot to do with it.

you can definently go into labour this time mel. i know it :D

I think our mental state has a lot to do with it... not that I have gone through a labour or birth just yet but this line of thinking is a major reason as to why I am getting my brain in the right frame of mind IYKWIM

Definately babe.

Will BBL after sports with the kiddies, to tell you about NOT wanting Kane to come out...... and how it stalled me.....

Yes, absolutely!!!!

Both times I had my induction booked & I went into labour within hours. I think that because I had an end date I relaxed & that was it.

Well I was completely convinced (due to family history) that I would go overdue with DS...but he surprised us by arriving 2 1/2 weeks early! So in my case, no, I don't think my mind had a lot to do with it...he was just ready to arrive. That's not to say that in some cases it doesn't influence proceedings though.

I defianetly think emotions and your mind have a lot to do with it... I was stressing about going into labour and not being able to say goodbye to my granddad, or going into labour when we were staying with my parents (and away from our hospital).

I found out my granddad passed at about 4pm, by 8pm I was on the phone with the hospital letting them know I was havinf irregular contractions and midnight my waters broke. I definitely think in a way my mindset was stopping me going into labour, and once my granddad had passed I felt a real release, that it was over and he was at peace, and I went into labour.

i agree with everyone coz the same thing happened with me on the monday i had BH for like 6 hours and they just went away and till thursday i was telling myself it gonna happen and sure enough thursday morning i had pain and my wateers broke at about 9:30am i think the walking definately helped i walked all mon tue and wed and i kept getting told he cant come on my sisters birthday and that he had to come by friday and sure enough he came on friday lol and on his due date 2

I always thought from the beginning that I would go into labour early.... had my hospital bag packed early, bubs room done, all the clothes in the drawers/cupboard etc.
I had my boy 3 weeks early! As it was kind of a shock I was ready to deliver my baby.

yeah, i reckon the mind is a powerful gift/curse. just look at the whole 'nesting' thing we do when we are preggers...

it's inevitable i reckon for us to compare our mum's experiences with our own. they are the closest to us to have gone through birth (i know that i def thought my labour would progress very similar to hers...BUT it sooo didnt).

may be a silly question, but have you looked into hypnotherapy or some kind of hypnobirth thing? might be cool to see if there is something out there that can help break any concious/subconcious walls that might stall labour.
and you're right, there was alot of pressure last time, from all corners (btw, i can't believe that someone actually told you that you'd be 'begging for a section'...seriously, that is totally bonkers and soooooo not true!).

would be cool if there was some pregnancy/birth meditation course out there...i would soo be joining up for next time.

It is my belief that your mind is your biggest birthing organ. If you're heads not right your Hoo Haa is going to have trouble dancing... It's a fact.

We are burdened of stories of mothers/sisters/aunts of births that went wrong - for some sadistic reason everyone wants to share their horror story. If you are like me and profess to loving labour and birth - you are often seen as freaky! ;)

We need to get away from this - to psychologically separate ourselves from this baggage. Don't underestimate it's load... :hug:

When a woman says: "I think I'm going to hve an issue birthing because mum did - you can be sure she will"... Of course not always but often.
Because our minds are powerful powerful powerful organs. They can manifest disease, pain & difficulty birthing to name but a few...

What needs to happen is a reprogramming of the mind. As a Woman your body knows inately - with the DNA imprint of millenia how to birth a baby. Your mind however doesn't.

The same often happens with breastfeeding - mum had trouble so will I... "I come from a long line of women who can't feed"...

You need to recreate your reality. The reality is you have a Womb, A Cervix, A Vagina, Pelvic Muscles - your body is made to birth. What you need is focused intent.

When the I can't happens - question that. Why do I feel that? Could the opposite be true? How would I feel if I didn't have that belief". If the opposite could also be true isn't it wiser to focus on that? The answer is yes.

Don't be hard on yourself Mel - this is something that you have had passed on to you - and many many many women have it. The thing is it doesn't need to be the same. It can be different - I truly believe heart and soul that it can be.

You need good quality care - that is loving, supportive and truly gets where you are coming from.

Many of us gestate longer than 42 weeks - losing your plug is a good sign that your body is preparing for birth. Bless your body for that! It knows Mel how to do it - this time your head has to come into line with your Hoo Haa! I was 2 weeks late with my first, on time with my second, 10 days late with my third and on time with my fourth - there often is no pattern. Believing that your mothers birthing history dictates yours sets you up for failure...

Stick up affirmations around your house - everywhere! Get some books and make them your Bible do not allow any negatives to reach your ears. Friends who goad you & say you can't do it are not being good friends. Granted not everyone has the same ideals around birth - but don't discuss your birth with anyone who will not hold your goals in the same energy that you do. Have a mantra to deflect the comments: "I don't want to discuss birthing this baby - let's talk about something else..."

Sending you loving support... :hug:

I believe it does to a degree. My parents always come to stay with us the week or so before my due date (they live 4 hours away). After a week or so of waiting around and nothing happening, my dad's had enough of the city and heads home.

Both times i have gone into labour the day after he left (both babies born 10 days over). I've always said that my babies don't want to come when poppy's here! But the more I think about it, the more I think it's ME that doesn't want to labour with my dad around because I don't think he would handle seeing me in that state. I am not comfortable to labour with him here. I remember saying to my mum last time that the baby would not come until Dad went home.

I am going to ask my mum in the nicest way possible to leave him at home this time, or ask him to leave before my due date...my own little psychological experiment if you will ;)

I believe our minds are powerful tools, and some people just don't realise how powerful.

I don't we can actually put our selfs into labour by just wishful thinking, I believe it is a lot more complex than that but I do believe we have the energy forces to make positive outcomes too.

Of cousre you will be ale to go into labour, our bodies are also very powerful..

I was 12 days over with my first labour and with my second I went over by 5 days technically arccording to my obs dates but i worked out DS would come on the 18th and he did...mind you just scrapped in as he was born 20 mins before midnight...

Good Luck, positive thinking has a lot to do with it all

I ABSOLUTELY believe that !

With DS#1 i was extremely nervous about giving birth. I was having alot of really painful pre labour/contractions and it started to freak me out. So i think my Vagina went :o then it went :sick: ! :rolleyes:
I ended up being induced and he was forceped out cause i didnt have any energy left from a huge lack of sleep from stressing. I also had an epidural.

Then when i was pregnant with DS#2 i was so busy running around after DS#1 that i didnt really think about it too much. I was very relaxed about the whole thing.
I went into labour 10 days early and had a great birth.
Show -6am
Contractions started about an hour later
Started timing contractions at roughly 3pm
Waters broke -6pm
Hospital -8pm
Delivered - 9.53pm
Obviously my body was ready but i do believe that alot of it also had to do with my relaxed state of mind.
I was very happy with how it all went ! No pain relief.

Then DS#3 - whole other story - alot of pressure to perform and in alot of pain. Went past my EDD and was induced cause i couldnt take the pain anymore.
This was the worst birth of them all. No pain relief and i didnt cope cause he was bigger than my other two and i started to panic from the pain.
Also after they broke my waters they left me for a while to see if the contractions would start. Around 3 - 4 hrs later they werent quite regular enough for their liking so they wanted to put in a drip to make them regular. I kept saying NO. Managed to stall for quite a while. Then as soon as the Midwife left the room to organise the drip, i thought "oh my goodness, i need to push". She came back in and got quite a surprise. There was no way i wanted that drip. I knew i didnt need it.

Sorry this has turned out to be so long, but i was trying to show what type of birth i had in relation to my state of mind.
Next time round, i wont let the "outside" get "inside" - IYKWIM

You go girl ! - I hope you get the birth you long for ! You can do it ! :cheer:

Yes , yes and yes, will come back to read all of the posts and write more but what I do suggest is 2 weeks before your Due date, shut yourself off from those sorts of people, dont answer your phone and just enjoy your time being pregnant, soak in the bath and think of labouring your child and keep BB switched on at all times. Spend this time with just you, DH and your kids, be a family and think of your new little one coming to join you.

We put enough pressure on ourselves that we dont need the unwanted pressure of outsiders.

Lots of :hug: to you. Rambled thoughts are always the most interesting and meaningful.

Not sure. I wasn't really thinking about it since it was 2 weeks early. Took me about 6hrs before I actually realised what was going on! Was a really easy labour and she arrived another 6 or so hours after that without a tear or graze or any pain releif.

I am a pretty laid back sort of person for the most part and usually perform my best when I am not overthinking things!

ETA: My Mum and several other females in my family had their babies early so I always thought that would happen to me. I hadn't really heard any horror stories so I wasn't stressed out at all haha.