Help! Nap-time issues

My 11 month old daughter has for the last few months always had 2 naps a day, one in the morning and one in the arvo, for at least an hour each time. She has ALWAYS self-settled to sleep in her cot.

The last week or so however, she has dropped her morning nap which is fine... I know it's normal for them to drop a nap and only have one instead, but getting her to have a nap in the afternoon is painful!

She will start screaming if I put her in her cot for a sleep, and if she doesn't calm down within a minute of me leaving her room i'll go and get her and try to settle her to sleep on me. This usually takes ages as she's too busy looking around or trying to play with my face/hair/clothes and when she finally gives in and I get her into bed, she only has about 30 minutes! I know she's tired and needs it, and she's getting really cranky at night now because she hasn't slept enough during the day.

My mum told me I should let her cry longer, that because she knows i'll come if she cries this is why she does it... but I don't think I'll be able to take listening to her cry. It's not her "complaining" cry either, it's her "I'm serious" cry.

Is this normal behavior? Is there something that might have caused this sudden change? What can I do to get her back into her self-settling habit and to perhaps get her to have that nap a bit easier?

If she's still doing this when the next baby is born I'm not too sure how i'll juggle the demands of both.

Your advice is appreciated!

Just sounds like separation anxiety hun, could you go and lie down with her until she falls asleep?
It sounds like she just wants you with her.

Sue x

:hug: hun... it is so so hard and each child is different, can i just ask a few Q's?
What time did she used to go down and what time are you trying to get her down now?
Does she have a feed (bottle, BF or food) before her sleep?
Does she have a comfort toy?

:hug: It's so frustrating when they suddenly change when something was working so well, isn't it.

Have you tried putting her in her pram to nap? My dd has only slept well during the day in her pram for months. If I put her in her cot it's usually 30 mins max, whereas she sleeps for up to 2 1/4 hours on a good day in her pram. I don't wheel it around, just feed/rock in arms to sleep and then pop her in the pram in the hall at home unless I need to go out. She sleeps fine in her cot for the first few hours at night (and sometimes all night), and then into our bed, where she self settles without a problem.

Over the months, when babies in my mums & bubs group have had daytime sleep issues they've tried sleeping them in their prams and it often works. One was having problems in the evening and for a few weeks she put her DD in her pram until she went to bed, when they would then co-sleep - it gave them their evenings back where previously they'd been holding their DD and taking turns to eat etc.

yeah - is the afternoon nap at the same time or is it a bit earlier? sounds like she's a bit overtired by the time she goes down for the afternoon nap & maybe that's why she's having trouble settling?

i've also found that my DS will have weeks occasionally where naps go out the window & then he'll revert back to how he was - is she walking or does she seem close? i know DS' naps were horrible a couple of weeks ago for a few days & then he started walking & now he's pretty much back to where he was.

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:hug: hun... it is so so hard and each child is different, can i just ask a few Q's?
What time did she used to go down and what time are you trying to get her down now?
Does she have a feed (bottle, BF or food) before her sleep?
Does she have a comfort toy?

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Just typed it all out then lost it! Here we go again...

Her routine was:

9am - wake, formula & brekky
11am - nap
12noon - lunch & water
2pm - nap
3pm - afternoon tea & formula
5.30 - bath
6pm - dinner & water
8pm - formula & sleep (falls asleep on bottle)

Now she won't do the morning nap, doesn't even get tired. By 1-2pm she's getting tired & cranky and becoming velcro baby...I start trying to get her to have a nap without success. at 3pm I give her the bottle and try to put her down again without success, then try to get her to sleep in my arms which usually she does by 3.30 or 4pm and will have 30 mins. Then she's overtired and cranky at night!

She has one toy she loves to cuddle but doesn't depend on it.

Balmaingal - I haven't tried the pram but she's never wanted to sleep in the pram even when tiny. She refuses to nap in it if we're at the shops too... I suppose it wouldn't hurt to try, but usually if I lay her down in the pram when we're out to encourage a sleep she just cries and tries to sit up.

Sloane - I try to make her arvo one earlier, but although she's tired I can't get her down until way after her arvo nap used to be! Not sure how close to walking she is... she can walk holding one of my hands next to me and can balance for short periods of time... is a pro at her push-walker and "cruises" around alot on the furniture.

OK - so it seems to me that after dropping that morning nap she is well over tired by the afternoon time where she is only napping 30 minutes (classic over tired nap length)....extending it is impossible because she is not relaxed enough to move into that next sleep cycle and then by bedtime it's horrific - you will also see early wakings and night wakings (where they may not have been there before)

My advice (coming from experience with my 2 year old who used to be a shocking napper) is to try to get her to take her 1 nap at around midday and try to keep her sleeping for around 2 hours.

Do this by any way you can at this point - the self settling will be picked up once the habit of one longer sleep is in place. If you hear her stirring after 30 minutes to an hour, go in and attempt to settle her in her crib. If she needs to be picked up hold her til she's just about to close her eyes then try putting her back in bed. If that doesn't work, hold her until sleepy.

It does get better and she's about to hit some major milestones so sorting this out now will help later xxx

Does she have a blankie or dummy?

Aww hun your doing everything right they can be so stubborn sometimes.
I found when DD1 dropped to 1 day sleep (prob around 13-15mths) i had to time it just right, i found that by giving her an early lunch around 11:30 then putting her to bed by 12 worked well, she would then sleep b/w 1.5-3hrs and be up and refreshed for the afternoon.

Eventually the time altered by say 15-30min and she now goes to bed about 1 and sleeps roughly the same length of time.
If she didn't have lunch she wouldn't sleep as long and often wouldn't go to bed until she had eaten.

We found a gorgeous little baby cabbage patch and she sleeps with her now, she cuddles up and hardly budges, there were times where i would have to go and lay with her or cuddle her to sleep but now she's in a big girl bed (we needed the cot for DD2) and she loves it, doesn't get out, is happy to hop in enjoying a good rest.

I hope your DD is back to normal ASAP, the transition is hard but once you've got the timing right and she comfortable again it will be great!

Thanks for the advice! I might try putting her down today for a nap straight after her lunch and see if that helps at all!

Will let you know how I go :)

Update

Well Miss E had a slight sleep in this morning so got up at 9.30am, had brekky/play and by 11am was rubbing her eyes and grizzling. So I tried putting her down which resulted in a cry, so back up she came and fell asleep on me for 20 mins. I tried to move her back into her cot but she woke up and started crying again. She wouldn't go back to sleep on me but is now on her playmat and keeps putting her head down and laying down! I know she's tired, why won't she sleep!?

Lunch is due within half an hour, i'll try again after that... it's just strange behavior.

Aww hun... maybe give her lunch, read a book and have a cuddle then try popping her in?
Do you have a chair in her room, maybe relax in there with her for a bit and then try???

Hope it goes ok, might take a while, could she be teething?

It's possible she's teething, I thought she might be when she started being grizzly this week, her gums are a little red but no sign of a new tooth just yet, she hasn't had one in months! Her amber necklace is back on just in case though.

Poor bubba - something is certainly up!

How is her eating and drinking?

Eating and drinking is normal... however her poo has been more solid than usual and she's had heaps of wind???

The poor thing... maybe try some brauers stomach calm or something gentle like that to help settle her belly?
I know when DD1 was teething she was a right PITA to get to sleep so maybe some teething relief or neurofen if she seems extra grumpy and sore?

GL hun, hope it all sorts out soon.

Infants Friend is also a lovely complimentary medicine that will help keep her bowels soft - you can pick it up in Coles, Pharmacies etc