Parenting After Loss or Miscarriage November 2010

Welcome to Parenting after Miscarriage or Loss. In this thread you will find women who are navigating the sometimes difficult but joyous challenge of parenting after saying goodbye. This can present many challenges. In this thread you will find friendship and a safe place to share your experiences.

We are eagerly awaiting the news of Kelly's baby as we continue to support our long time member Michelle through parenting her Earth children after the tragic loss of her husband earlier this year.

We have seen Jayne off to China & we continue to look forward to news of her family's adventures & her adventures in parenting in a new culture. Some of our members have recently had miscarriages & we continue to support & love you on your way.

As always we welcome with sad but open arms new members to our thread & hope very much you find the support you need to parent after loss.

If you have any concerns within the thread please email/ PM any of the following Moderating/Admin team for this forum (all emails & PM's are treated equally & confidentially) :-

Rogue
Mistyfying
Inanna and
Spring Angel

Their email addresses can be found here.

Please note - To receive thread notfications click the "thread tools" button at the top of this post and click "Subscribe to Thread" there is no need to post in order to get notifications.

Here's wishing each and every one of you, a happy and easy going parenting journey after a difficult ride to get there!

You will find the previous thread HERE

I'm first I'm first!!! But I feel so heavy in my heart for Freya's friend.......... I know I'm helpless, but I still wish I could help.

KELLY _ Rest up tonight my sweets, my heart is beating wildly for you already!!! I can't wait for that magical text!!!

Well, it's official, I have some new friends. lol. I went out with one of them today & off with a group of them tomorrow & then off to a lantern making craft afternoon on Thursday with all the kids & then Zumba on Friday morning......... I feel relieved beyond relief that I now have something constructive to do during the day, lol. My apartment is so sparkling clean though! bahahah

Love Jayne x

Kelly I'm wishing you all the best for your little one's arrival and can't wait to hear all about your little bundle in a couple of days time :)

Freya I'm so so sorry for your friend and her family. I wish I could offer some advice but nothing I can say will help. I do like the sound of that little website you've found though. Maybe a little pendant or bracelet would be suitable for your friend.
I hope you are ok..you know we are all here for you too :hug:

Jayne Well done for making friends already..I hope you have fun tomorrow and then at your lantern making class too..sounds like fun :) Oh and how clever is Jess at writing in Chinese symbols. How is Curly settling in? Is she still loving school?

Hi to everyone...Not feeling very much up to doing more personals tonight.I do hope you are all ok though :hug:

HI Ladies,

I need your advice. Curly is having an absolute BALL at school, only she gets anxious getting ready in the mornings & complains she doesn't want to go, but once we are there she is fine. We have had 2 crying episodes but have sorted them by me participating in the class for around 30 minutes each morning, & then she is happy for me to leave. They don't allow you to do the 'disappear' thingy, they make you say goodbye to the children, so the children are clear that you are gone. Anyway, on Thu they have an excursion to the dentist & the mere mention of it to Claudia has sent her over the edge. She panics now every morning going to school that it will be 'dentist day', so tonight I have told her (& I gave Jess the option), that she can stay home from school on Thursday. Is this bad?? Jess had a visit to the dentist about 2 weeks before we came over here, & Claudia is only 3 & had no issues with teething, etc... so I highly doubt there will be any issues in her mouth. I know that dentists are important, but honestly, the poor child has just moved country, started full time school & is adjusting to having Daddy here every night. Do you think I'm bad letting them stay home on Thu? Plus, we are still dealing with 'I want to be with Mummy' issues after Jessica's big stint in hospital. Although she coped beautifully being away for me for all those nights, she is still glued to me every chance she gets. So I'm pretty sure she is still getting over that big separation.

I think I just needed some reassurance.....

Thanks as always ladies.

Love Jayne xx

Thanks for the advice guys. I tossed and turned all night thinking about how much pain she must be in right now. Im going to go with the charm bracelet idea.

Kristy, Im glad you popped in because I thought of you when she told me. I was umming and ahhing about asking if I could pass your number on to her so she has a connection in person with someone who understands how she feels on a stronger level than just sympathy if she needs it. Your military too so there is that added dimension.

Jayne, Im going to ring her on the weekend as Im not sure when exactly this all happened, she was about 7-8wks infront of me so Im guessing it would have been in the last 2wks. I didnt know whether it would be rude to ask if it was a boy or a girl, she didnt mention it so I thought maybe they might have chosen not to know. Its so hard to know what the right etiquette is for a situation like this so Im trying very hard not to step on toes.

I just keep thinking about silly things like I wonder if she got her VBAC and that it would suck to have it under these circumstances, whether the baby was a boy or a girl, if they named him/her, were they going to do a funeral or something because she was past 20wks so I think the law is that they are recognised officially? Did she have the support she needed, if they had got around to telling their DD (when they left here she was 16wks and still hadnt told her because of their previous miscarriage).

I just so wish I was up there :(

Of course please pass on my details. If she is defence I wonder if our paths have already crossed. I can arrange kid free time to go and visit her. Anything at all I can do I'm here.

Time to start stalking Kelly me thinks

I'll pm you here name Kristy just in case you have already met her.

Is someone updating for Kelly or is she going to update us herself?

I'm still here guys!!!! LOL. Not going in until tomorrow morning!! I'll have the laptop with me but Janie is in charge of any updates as she'll get the text messages (as will anyone else that I have mobile numbers for)!!! Super excited but I've been struck down with another migraine this morning, so not feeling very good today... sooo frustrating... can't I just enjoy my last day ever of being pregnant. Not that I'm letting it stop me. It's such a surreal feeling, know that I'm going in and will meet this baby tomorrow!!! So crazy.. after everything we've been through.

Freya - OMG.. I'm soooo sorry to hear about your friend but think the bracelet is a wonderful and very thoughtful idea. Massive hugs.. must be really hard for you right now too. Why is the world such a cruel place sometimes.

Jayne - I think you're doing the right thing hun... it's been a MASSIVE change for the girls and you really need to think about the big picture and do what you feel is right for them. They've been through a lot. Good luck.

Mako - Hugs hun.. still thinking of you.

Well.. I'm starving, so off to pig out as much as I can before I have to start fasting - LOL. Then I desperately need a sleep... my damn head is killing me. Still haven't packed either, so really should get onto that!!! I'm just so excited. Can't wait to share my news with you all!!

Kel xxx

I was just coming in to say my excitement got the better of me & I'm a day in advance! :pmsl: Sorry Kelly!!!
Just read everything I wrote for you today Kel!
Love Jayne x

Jayne you know you little girls better than anyone else so if you think the day off is best them go for it. You're right, they've been through so much change that it might be hood to have a special day with Mummy.

I'm so glad you're making friends, I'm sure before long you'll have a buzzing social life.

Kelly: I got swept up in the excitement. Enjoy your pig out and your last day of bring UTD. I hope your headache passes soon.

Spring xx

Hi girls,

sorry for the lack of personals, am shattered after clinic tonight...

but coul not post and say KELLY good luck tomorrow babe, it makes my heart flutter, the thought of you meeting your new baby.... such a perfect time..... will be stalking you tomorrow lol....

all my love hon, Lee xoxoxo

FREYA - was so sad and sorry to read your news about your friend, thats just crap xoxo

Aaahhhhhh... I'm getting really nervous!! God knows how I'm going to be able to sleep tonight. I've finally finished packing my bags (well... my suitcase actually) - I've got WAY too much stuff but who cares.. I figured I may as well fill the suitcase.. no point taking it half full!!!! LOL. I'm just in a daze... and still can't quite get my head around the fact that I'm actually going to meet this little bub tomorrow morning. I don't know why I'm so nervous but after everything I'm just a bit anxious. I hate the thought of getting sliced open but can't wait to have our little bub safely in my arms... and I'm glad we don't know what we're having now!!! It's very exciting.

Anyway I'm babbling now so will go.. just couldn't help but post one more time. Hopefully I'll feel up to a quick post tomorrow avo but Janie will be sure to keep you all informed!!!

Kel xxx

I'm super dooper excited for you Kelly! I can't wait to hear your lovely news. Gawd it makes me want another one already.

I am super excited too! Spring or Lee or anyone can you text me tomorrow? I'm going to be away from the computer all day...

All the best for tomorrow Kelly. I'm so excited and don't know how I'm going to go having to wait until I finish work tomorrow to find out all the news :)

Kelly - I wish you all the very best tomorrow hun. Can't wait to hear your news.

Freya - So sorry your friend has to go through such a lose. :hug:

Jayne - So glad you've made some friends. I didn't doubt for a minute that you wouldn't. I think you'd be a very magnetic person. I hope the girls are ok and go with your gut hun.

Hi all

Ahhhhhh Im so excited, good luck Kelly!!!!!

(Dont worry Kris, Im clucking too ;) )

Ahhhhhh Im so excited, good luck Kelly!!!!!

(Dont worry Kris, Im clucking too ;) )