40+4 weeks... Now what?

So I had my DS at 33 weeks... A natural spontaneous 3 hour birth.

This time I was very happy to get to 36 weeks and didn't expect to get much further than 37-38. And now I'm here... Almost a week overdue, and feeling a month overdue!!

I spent so much energy on being organised and ready for a 36-38 week birth, that I am now in unknown territory and totally deflated.

My fears now are that things will start to get dangerous for bub in there, or that another natural birth will go out the window... On one hand, I like that booking an induction will give me a date to look forward to, but at the same time I fear intervention will just lead to more intervention.

I am sooo bored at home... And every little thing irritates me. Ahhhh I'm over it! And if 1 more person calls or texts 'Any news?' Or 'Baby?'... I will smash my phone!! Do they really think we wouldn't have told them??

Yeah not fun going over! With DD I went 40+6 and with DS 42weeks...the waiting can be annoying and stressful.

You don't have to go induction route, just opt for extra monitoring instead. But if Bub is still moving about fine all should be good. Good luck, it shouldn't be much longer now!

Pay attention to bub's movements, but all should be fine. S/he is just comfy ;)

My girls were all over due. 41+1, 41 & 40+5. All were spontaneous labours. Don't stress just yet, all babies, pregnancies & births are different.

Have you tried natural induction methods? EPO, RLT, DTD & nipple stimulation? All mine got going after a good long walk. Acupuncture can help as well I've heard.

It'll happen soon :)

:hug: It sucks, doesn't it? When you're ready so early and don't just go past that date, but past anything anyone expected! It's hard, but I made a conscious decision this time to actively enjoy every last day before baby, because I knew this time what to expect, how much life would change for all of us. I tried to do special things with DD because soon I wouldn't get the chance.

As for the dangers, if you're worried you could ask for more monitoring. Does it help to know that it's completely normal to go overdue? I can't for the life of me remember or find the stats, but a pregnancy over 40 weeks is still very normal, I just can't remember what the research said you could go to! Hopefully I'll find it with a bit more searching or someone else will know, but it seems that the 40 weeks thing is not the standard for most women.

Induction can be scary but it's not all bad. I was induced for both of mine and they were good births. I had gels only for both, and labour with DS was just under three hours. I'm still writing up the birth story, but if you look through the birth stories forum here for the induction ones, there are plenty that don't involve too much intervention.

People texting and asking where baby is - I hate that! First time around I completely withdrew, ignored everything and basically didn't exist on the phone or fb. This time I posted inane everyday things, so people saw my life was just going on as per usual. This time I only got asked once, compared to the multiple questions daily last time :)

You can safely go up to 42 weeks before things start to go down hill. It is very unlikely that you won't go into labour before 42 weeks, but it has happened. A friend had 2 of hers at 42+2.

The placenta can start to deteriorate around 42 weeks, so there'll probably be talk of monitoring/induction before then. But my gp/ob wouldn't consider induction til 10 days past due. Even then it was only discussing it.

If worried you can be monitored every couple days to be on the safe side :)

I totally get you. My first was premmie at 34+6, and I was told I'd be lucky to get to 28w with DS2. So at 28w I celebrated. And at 32w. And at 36w. And again at 38w. By 39w I was huge, and over it. But I wanted to try for a VBAC so hung on. And on. By 40w I was definitely over it. By 41w I was really getting cross. At 41+1 I was admitted to hospital with a raging frontal lobe headache (typical for pre-eclampsia which was why DS1 came early) and the doctors and XH decided he was coming out by c/s the next day. I still wanted my VBAC but it wasn't to be. So nine days over. And over it. Completely.

I totally get you. Totally. Sending you much love and support. Minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day… it's another minute/hour/day closer to baby being born.

Best wishes.

That must be a very difficult head space to be in.
You're not technically post dates till you're 42 weeks, so that's still within the 'normal' range, but that doesn't mean it's easy, and particularly if you've been expecting it for weeks and weeks already, I imagine!
'Things' can happen at any time, it's not really something you can predict, you've just got to go with what your'e feeling and what you decide with your carers is going to be best for you.
Can you talk to your caregiver about how you're feeling?

Aw :( hugs to you! I went to 40+10 with my first (9 years ago but feels like yesterday). It totally sucked. Especially all the text messages. I ended yo avoiding going out to places where I knew I'd see people I knew lol.

I'm suggesting, if you have a little cash to spare, make an appointment for yourself for everyday in the next week. A pedicure, a massage, reflexology session etc or even go to your local pools for a mum only swim/float around. It will give you something to treat you each day while you wait, and something to cancel when bub arrives (which may sound silly, but when you're overdue with a bub it's nice to say to someone "sorry I'm in labour & won't be able to make my appointment" lol).

Thank you for all your replies... ive just had such a tough time keeping my mind on track.

And here I am at 1am feeling lots of tightenings, but having no idea of they're labour or more of the BH I've been having for months now. There's no distinct start and end of the contraction or back pain... So is impossible to time them. At the moment it's all feeling constant. Or is this indigestion? I've been passing gas like a trooper and have been constipated for days.
My last labour started with my waters breaking and contractions starting an hour later in hospital. So much easier!!

At this point I'm not overly concerned about the baby because I have been feeling plenty of movement. I guess I just started to worry because I read something about increased risk of stillbirth.

In terms of induction... I am in 2 minds. On 1 hand having an end date will help me mentally... On the other, I fear complications of forcing my body to do something it doesn't seem to be ready to do.

The silly part in all this... I don't know why I'm in a rush. I know what's coming in terms of labour (ouch), recovery and having a newborn! I don't particularly like the newborn phase, but I'm past trying to enjoy my pregnancy because I'm just so uncomfortable and feel useless. I can't play with my DS like I used to, struggle to go out, struggle to do anything around the house, not working...

My poor DH is on constant alert and has been falling behind at work because he's trying to be close to home as much as possible in case something happens.

I'm sorry it's so negative, just so bloody over it!!

I can relate to your frustrations. I had DD at 38 weeks and although I had DS at 40 weeks it felt like I has overdue. I had intense prelabour for a week and was so on edge!

I think perhaps you should think about all the things you need before you feel safe to labour. Is your DH available enough? Are you confident about what you're doing with your DS?

I found I didn't go into labour until DH was home all day Saturday and I got lots of cuddle time with him, then when DD went to bed, my waters finally broke and it all happened.

Do you have a candle to light? Maybe start lighting a candle each night and opening your heart to the baby.

These have all helped me anyway.

Sending birthing vibes to you.

I think I have everything organised... DH has the flexibility to work from home and has been to be close by. DS is equally as frustrated as me - baby's taking a long time to come out mummy! Haha

I have definitely avoided going to certain places where people comment because I feel like I've had the same convo 100 times. My local Woolies is a no go zone! Lol One particular lady there has been commenting through the whole pregnancy and 2 weeks ago told me I'd have a baby next time she sees me... Ahhh no!

I am having serious lower back pain today - fingers crossed its a sign of something.

Sounds like it won't be long now

Oh I really hope so... I just had a bit of a teary because my back is killing me, but I don't feel like I'm having regular contractions in the front, and it all got a bit much :(

Hopefully having a bit of a cry helps release some of the pressure.

Just got back from a visit to the OB.

The good news is that I am feeling much better about everything since we came up with a plan and talked through my concerns.

My OB is on the same page as me and very much hopefully of a natural birth. We have booked in a date for induction, but we all hope I'll go before that and said that it can always be cancelled.

In terms of the induction - he will do an internal and if my body isn't ready he will send me home. Alternatively, he will break my waters and wait, he said he tries to avoid drugs and will hold them off as long as possible. Again, he thinks/hopes breaking my waters will be enough since my body has done it all before.

Of course I'm nervous, but with a plan and more of an end in sight I am feeling so relieved!

Bub is doing well in there, still plenty of movement, and I was having a contraction while we were listening to the heartbeat and bub was not in the least bit phased!

In answer to your question.... just keep swimming :D

RCOG have even updated their guidelines to now reflect full term to be up to 42 weeks and have moved the bar higher saying the longer they are in there, the better. I'll see if I can find the article.

Its not dangerous at 40 weeks unless you are high risk or something gets picked up. But with no evidence showing bub is not happy, then, just keep swimming :)

Good luck Connie!! Hope to see your bundle of joy announcement soon :)

Hopefully you've had bub by now! I had my bub a week ago at 41.2w. At my 39.5w check I was referred for an ultrasound to check the amnio fluid. I am glad I went & done the ultrasound now as I had low amnio fluid (under 5th percentile) & needed to be induced. My placenta was also calcified.

Speak with your carer about concerns. Good luck! I hope it happens naturally for you (if birth hasn't happened yet!)

Just quickly... I went into labour naturally on Friday night just after midnight. By the time we got to the hospital an hour later, I was 9cm... Waters were broken at 10cm and our baby boy was born 30 minutes later.

2hr 45min natural delivery

Baby stats: 3.5kgs, 51cm long, 35cm head, perfectly healthily!

We're home now and so thankful I had another great birthing experience!