I had an in labour caesarean.
Unnatural, cold, scary, nauseating, unnecessary, like being a paralysed puppet with people pulling my limbs around. The pressure on my fundus was massive and I had no idea at the time why that was happening.
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good aspects of the surgery?
None. I didn't actually need it. Personally I can't imagine a good aspect to any surgery, I didn't enjoy my appendectomy either but at least it was necessary.
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not-so-good aspects of the surgery?
PTSD nearly four years laters and counting - nightmares, depression, flashbacks, hypervigilance
being suicidal when my baby was 6 months old
a scar
a scalpel wound on his head and damage to his neck and head from the forceps used to lift him out
not giving birth to my baby
not knowing I had been given a suppository of a major narcotic to which I had not consented or that my legs were splayed open and a swab inserted in my vagina to check for bleeding which left me with painful scratching
having a catheter although I had it removed asap when I got out of recovery
my baby not having an optimal start to life, being cut off his cord way too early and handled under bright lights by complete strangers who didn't love him
having people tell me it was no big deal when it shattered my life
staff refusing to allow my baby in recovery even though I was the only woman in there
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involvement of your partner/DH?
He was wonderful. Right there, holding my free hand, then had skin to skin with our son while I was alone in recovery being mocked by the staff for wanting to breastfeed my newborn
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amount of time between the surgery and holding your baby?
About three hours. No medical need, they just refused to allow him in recovery. I will never recover from the grief of that.
Physical recovery was totally fine. I went home the same day as the surgery and had no difficulty at all. I took a bit of panadol now and then.
Emotional recovery is much harder. i worked very hard at it and made sure I had dealt with everything I could before I conceived my second child. That was exactly two years after the surgery.
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tips for good recovery?
Take lots of arnica because the bruising is extreme from having all those layers of muscle cut
lots of Emergency Essence/Rescue Remedy for physical shock
lots of vit c and zinc to aid soft tissue recovery
insist on immediate skin on skin while you're being stitched up, insist that you baby is in recovery with you, you can never get those hours back and they are crucial to your baby and you and especially breastfeeding
make sure you have a good probiotic for you and one for your baby. Their guts are permanently altered by inappropriate colonisation from not being born vaginally hence their higher rates of asthma and allergies. Breastfeeding the recommended minimum of two years will also help there.
Make sure you have a long babymoon with massive amounts of support in case you need extra care or are readmitted to hospital with complications. A freezer of meals and friends on rotation can help.
Spend every moment lying with your baby, having skin to skin, breastfeeding and trying to get those hormones into gear to avoid PND.
Make sure you have lots of emotional support to debrief.
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any issues with breastfeeding?
Despite being able to latch him onto my oedematous nipples (epidurals do that to you, the ABA has information on some ways to help your baby deal with it) I had no milk making activity at all until day 8. I had a great deal of support from my MW, a LC, and my naturopath. We used a feedline for about 48 hours with formula. He breastfed till he weaned himself at about 2 1/2 years.
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tips for getting yourself psychologically ready for a c-section?
Get as much information as you can about whether or not it's necessary. Many complications of birth are far more likely than UR even in a woman whose had multiple surgeries. Once you've had one you will always have that scar and the ramifications of it in the current poorly evidenced hospital environment.
In a medically necessary caesarean, have a birth plan and involve the hospital staff so they are clear with your needs. Do not let anyone tell you "hospital policy" means you can't have certain things. It doesn't. You are not a hospital, therefore hospital policy does not apply to you.
You can have skin on skin, a lotus birth, no hep b and vit k or whatever YOU want.
Insist on no comp feeding if your baby has to go to SCN with breathing difficulties. This is not unusual with c-sec babies. My son had a few weird breathing experiences but I think this was largely because of his premature placenta removal as he was actually less mucussy than my vaginally born daughter.
I wish you much luck if you choose surgery and I hope you have lots of support for your recovery. My vaginal birth was long and hard work and I'd do it again in a heartbeat.
