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So i'm thinking about a natural birth. Only problem is i have a VERY low pain tollerence, I had a good chat with mum who had 4 natural births and said that it was good pain.
Is there such a thing? haha I dont know if i can handle the intensity my OB father just tells me women do amazing things but you dont know what your in for and he is quite pro ECS. I have so much to consider but what were your advantages of your birthing choice. No matter what i do i do want it at a hospital. Thanks :D
Hi Lauren,
I think I have a low pain tolerance too, but I managed to have a completely natural birth with my son. With My DD I ended up having 2 shots of pethadine and gas, but I was induced with her and I went from having no pain or niggles, nothing, to full on 3-4min contractions in about half an hour. I managed the pain for about 16hrs before I couldn't stand it and asked for pain relief. I think I did pretty well considering. With DS I had some pretty serious prelabour for about a weeks or so before hand and then went to hospital 8cm dialated! I was so proud of myself and had convinced myself that I wasn't in actual labour. Because I believe I have a low pain tolerance I was telling myslef not to be such a wuss and to get over myself!! LOL. I was so stoked that I did it all on my own without pain relief. It is really amazing what you can do, and it is alot of mind power too, as well as good support people who believe in you.
I dont consider myself to have very good pain threshold, but I managed from begining to end (over 30 hrs) without anything till the very end (peth), and in hindsight I could and should have done without it.
Go in to labour with the expectation that you probably can do it without drugs, but knowing that they will be available should you find it too much. You can put this in your birth plan and do a bit of research first to see which drugs you would prefere over others. And have support people with you who can encourage you and believe in you.
I get what your Mum is saying about the good pain. It's not so much that it's a 'good' pain, but more like it's a constructive pain - you know that you are working for something at the end of it. It is hard to know how anyone will deal with labour and contractions as I know women who think they could but really struggled to stay focused and others who thought they wouldn't be able to deal with it do super well. IF you think that you will struggle, it would be well worth looking into doing a calmbirth or hynobirthing class as it will teach you how to focus through the contractions and manage the 'pain' of them more effectively. That's not to say at some stage you wont feel like you need pain relief, but if you can use calmbirthing or hypnobirthing tools to get you most, if not all of the way through that's great, because you really don't want to be turning up at 4cm dilated and screaming for an epidural kwim?
ETA - it might also be worth looking into getting a Doula to help support you through the birth too.
I have had both a c/s and a vaginal birth, and I would definitely recommend not having a c/s unless you have to. The recovery was much harder with the c/s simply because you require your abdominal muscles for just about everything you do. So while it doesn't hurt to actually have the baby, the pain overall is worse.
I opted for the gas towards the end of my labour, but I get what your mum says about good pain. Every contraction is achieving something. Yes it hurts, but in between the contractions there is no pain and you know that each contraction will end. I also found that the nervous excitement I felt about being in labour kept me going for quite a long time; the pain didn't matter so much because I was going to meet my son soon.
There are always the drugs if you find you can't deal with the pain once you are there. A good epidural and you shouldn't feel a thing.
I think the whole process is worse for the men, they just feel kind of useless because they can't make it faster, or easier etc. They can only hold your hand and telling you you are doing a good job. I think this is why men often think an elective c/s is an easier option.
Hey, I've always believed I've had a low pain tolerance and still think I do. I knew labour would be very painful and thought I most likely wouldn't cope and would end up asking for an epidural. Because I thought this, when I was in actual full blown labour I didn't believe it, I just thought I was being a wuss and that I had hours to go! Turns out I almost had my baby at home - by the time I got to the hossy and into my room I was pushing. I had my own midwife and she told me I was 7cm dialated before we left my house for the hospital. Oh I might add, DS is my first and he was 2 weeks early so I really wasn't expecting it so that also made my belief that I wasn't really in labour stronger! Point is, labour is a really DIFFERENT pain and I don't think you can measure your pain threshold in this circumstance - I went from thinking I'd have an epi, to having no time for one even if I wanted it.
I guess believing I have a low pain threshold worked for me and might for you :D I just kept saying to myself "no this can't be it, I've got hours to go, stop being a wuss" and "if I can't manage now, I'm going to crumble by the end of it!" LOL
You will seriously suprise yourself. I know this sounds really cliched, but trust your body - it knows what to do! And if you do need some relief or help to push things along, so be it, your body will let you know.
I'm another who sooks a lot when I have any sort of pain, I can have a man-cold better than most guys I think. But I was surprised at how effective my body was at labouring - all the hormones meant I was focussed, able to breathe through contractions, used warm water as pain relief, had great support. I always thought I'd be resisting the temptation for drugs (I really didn't want any except for maybe gas, since I'd researched the effects of these drugs and decided they weren't for me), but it never once occurred to me to ask for drugs in my first labour. Honestly!
So I wouldn't judge your ability to birth confidently and well on your every day pain threshold, because when you stub your toe you don't have all those amazing hormones running through your body, or a good support team. :p
I have a very low pain tolerance too, and i've attempted 2 natura births but had morphine both times. I tried to use hypnobirthing techniques the first time, they didn't work for me. I'm not one for relaxing and visualisation. And while it is a productive pain, it still damn hurts. I found it uncomfortable and unpleasant. And to be totally honest, having gone through it feeling absolutely everything, if i ever had a third i wouldn't want to feel it again. I didn't enjoy either birth, particularly because they were so painful, and it created a very negative mindset, and particularly the second birth i believe a factor in my PND. So if there was ever a third labour for me i would go all the pain relief i could get. I realise this isn't a popular choice, but i'm just being honest!
I have a very low pain tolerance too, and i've attempted 2 natural births but had morphine both times. I tried to use hypnobirthing techniques the first time, they didn't work for me. I'm not one for relaxing and visualisation. And while it is a productive pain, it still damn hurts. I found it uncomfortable and unpleasant. And to be totally honest, having gone through it feeling absolutely everything, if i ever had a third i wouldn't want to feel it again. I didn't enjoy either birth, particularly because they were so painful, and it created a very negative mindset, and particularly the second birth i believe a factor in my PND. So if there was ever a third labour for me i would go all the pain relief i could get. I realise this isn't a popular choice, but i'm just being honest!
I don't really think pain tolerance has much to do with it. It's really about how you labour. If you are active and find good positions, and use your breathing to help you focus, then it's much easier. And afterwards it's the best feeling to know that you've done it - it's something you can't understand until you've experienced it. I highly recommend the book New Active Birth by Janet Balaskas. It is a fantastic way to prepare for birth and help achieve a natural labour.
It is almost impossible to imagine how you will cope in labour. I wouldn't even let a nurse drain my bruised thumb nail because I couldn't imagine it not hurting. It doesn't hurt but my mind just couldn't wrap its head around the concept. The thought of labour was much the same -- how could I possibly do this? The thing with it, though, is that you have to. There really is no way out, you can't run away from it. The baby has to come out, one way or another. I never thought I would be able to do it but when you are in the heat of the moment, you just have to! It is hard to explain but you can do it, you know? I went in with the mindset that I would just "see how I go". In the end, I didn't have any drugs. I also didn't do much research into it all because I am one of those people who tend to overthink things. Sometimes you just gotta trust your body and let it do its thing.
I think the most important thing is to think about how YOU handle things. Are you better when you are aware of all the possible scenarios or do you cope better when thrown in the deep end and working it out as you go? No one way works for everyone so take the time to really think.
Oops double post.
I think some people just don't cope with pain. New Active Birth was my bible with DS1, i practiced the positions, i had a plan, i surrounded my self with women who'd had natural births. I also spent the entire labour having showers, being on all fours, birthing ball, (17 hours of alternating), listening to hypnobirthing cd, music, being massaged. And ended up 2 hours pushing sitting on a birthing stool (supposedly great position as gravity works in your favour). Well it still hurt like hell! and is not something i enjoyed or ever want to experience again.
edit,
and i thought that my second labour would be more tolerable as i'd been through it before. I repeated all the same things, and it was equally painful. I guess i just don't do pain. :(
Have you read the info sheet on CS from RANZCOG? A CS is major abdominal surgery. I have had 2 VBs and am planning a CS for this baby as I physically cannot do a VB this time. There are usually less risks with a VB and recovery from a VB is much faster. If you are really concerned about the pain factor then drugs would be more beneficial in terms of pain than a CS because the pain of recovery after Abdo sugery is more constant than a contraction. As soon as labour is over in a VB, the pain stops. You may have some contractions while BFing to get your uterus down to normal size, but you would get those with a CS too.
Some Ob's dont have the same level of faith in the ability of a womans body as others. Some men in general can't handle not being in control of the situation (some women too ;)). Seeing as your dad does have a special interest in your pain levels I would very stongly recommend that you see a different Ob because I would be concerned that he would be too emotionally involved to make the best clinical judgement.
Labour is different for everyone. Only you will know at the time how much you can handle.
Your Dad is a specialist Ob, so being a specialist he would see more high risk women, and less of the normal straightforward pregnancies. There is nothing saying you will be high risk, so if your dad is doing a quick AN check on you and says you are perfectly fine, low risk ect, then there is no reason to believe that you will need a CS or induction until you are 42 weeks pg. It is normal to go to 42 weeks too ;)
You may be surprised at what you can handle hun, If it gets too bad you can always get more intervention, but if you start wth the max intervention you cant reduce it as easily.
thanks for all the fab advice and suggestions i appreciate it heaps
so i had a very long chat with dad and im going for a drug free vaginal birth. Very full on for the first baby but i figure god invented me to do this so i'll do it for my baby :) i will have the drug option if completley necessary in the birth plan but im gonna try and fight it out after all tiger has fought to hold on so ill fight for tiger :D
thanks gals
xx
Sounds as if you have arrived at a great conclusion :)
I was going to post that if you have a low pain threshold then stick with natural labour plans. I have heard that having a c-section is actually very painful in the recovery period. So even though my threshold got "lower" with each of my 3 births I knew that dealing with the pain for one day was waaaay preferable than dealing with it for weeks afterwards. Bit like ripping off a band-aid; would you do it fast and get it over and done with or drag it out sloooowly? though, at the end of the day do what is right at the time. I recommend drafting up a birth plan... I found the hopsital staff took them more seriously with each one (I had a 12 year spacing with my births). Write down what you would ideally like to happen... but factor in the unexpected. And like Trillian suggested, maybe enlist the help of a doula. I had one for my third birth. She can be the best pain relief you could ever find! Don't underestimate the power of a calming voice and a trustworthyy, constant presence (mid wives are nortoriously busy and you could be dismayed at how much you are left to your own devices). BellyBelly has some amazingly helpful articles about doulas and the role of your partner at birth.... don't forget to check them out ;)
You go girl ;) I'm aiming for the same this time round. i have an extremley low pain tolerance- I've been known to pass out from the pain of banging my finger with a hammer :rolleyes:- and the first time round I had gas and a pethidine shot. In hindsight, they didn't help at all- only restricted my body from doing what it should have been (cause the peth just made me soooo stoned, it was ridiculous). I think it was more panic than pain that made me ask for them.
Good idea Lori :) I agree, I did that too the first time around (asked for peth and gas) and yes: it only made it worse. By the time I had my third I resolved to try to avoid all that and I found that my body compensated naturally by actually giving me far superior natural "relief" in the form of longish periods of pain "lull". Just before transition I found that my body actaully gave me a break... it was weird... I felt tired but the pain really subsided and gave me a good half hours break just before it came time to push. I suspect that taking all that "pain relief" in my first two labours interfered with this process. Let me tell you it was very surprising, and very welcome!
I tend to agree with most of the posts here, and i was secretly pleased to see you have your mind set on vaginal birth. Good for you.
Pain tolerance has little to do with it, it's all about your labour. For me i think the great thing about the vaginal delivery (for me) was that once it was over, the pain was all gone. Even the stitches weren't that bad. I would definitely do it that way again if i can, so that means it can't be all that bad, aye!
Yep, it's painful, but as the other's said, it's constructive pain. And you can always just squeeze DH's hand a little bit tighter !!
Good luck, I hope you have the birth experience that you dream of.
thanks guys
finally getting passed one of the big decisions left me feeling empowered today.
I got alot accomplished and I feel fab :dance:
starting to collect all my info I'm so early and so excited ahahahahah.
thanks again for all your amazing advice BB really is the best for answering all the questions that you need a mothers answer for :D
Oh dear...
After reading all the posts about people with a low pain tolerance handling labour superbly, I'm concerned!!!
I have a pretty high pain tolerance (after all the poop I went through as a kid, I need it!), so I hope the oppsite isn't true when it's my turn and I become a blubbering mess!!! :lol:
Hiya Rooey... I didn't necessarily handle the pain of labour superbly... it was extremely hard (and I too have experienced a fair degree of other types of pain in my life including multiple surgeries and 2 dislocated knees)... but the thing with labour pain is that you can focus on "getting through to the other side" and when you get there it's all worth it. I never forgot my labour pain... but it was more than worth it for the end result. And I also feel an AMAZING sense of accomplishment for having endured it. It made me feel like I can handle anything. That's what made it different from the other types of pain.