Working mums, how do you keep ontop of the housework?

I work about 38 hours a week in paid employment and I'm a mum to a very active 15 month old. I'm really struggling to keep on top of the housework and my home is a shambles because after a long day at work, both me and my husband (who works 12 hour days) are too exhausted and lazy to do anything.

If you are in a similar boat to me, I would love to know how you cope with the housework? In our house I seem to do most of it.

What systems do you have? do you have time to watch TV or do you just forgo your own relaxation needs so you can have a clean house instead?

Danni, I'm not a mum, but (until recently) I was working fulltime plus driving DH into work as he's on crutches - leaving the house at 6.30am and not getting back til about 7pm. I considered it a good night if I cooked dinner instead of buying on the way home! Honestly, if I felt up to doing some housework through the week then I did, but the majority of it was left for the weekends.

I'm not sure how that would work with a child, but for us it was fine. As long as the mess was contained in the correct rooms - not leaving our clothes in the lounge, not leaving dishes in front of the tv - the house didn't look too bad. I just had to be strict and make sure my housework was done on Saturday before I did anything else!

I don't keep on top of the housework lol! Even when I'm not working (I'm part time) I still can't get it done. E.g. I spend 10 minutes washing the dishes, turn around and DD has spilt her drink, grabbed the jam and started eating it with her fingers and put sticky jam hands all over the walls. So I clean up her hands, wipe up the spill, wipe the jam off the walls . . . and DD has tipped her blocks all over the floor, pulled the pillows and blankets off the beds and pulled all of the baby wipes out of the container . . . you see where I'm going with this ;)

I have a philosophy; it doesn't matter if the house is messy as long as it's not dirty. Even if there are clothes and toys all over the floors I try to have all the rubbish in the bin, spills cleaned up, dirty clothes in the washing basket, dishes done etc. Then when I get time and energy to do more, I do. My house is about as clean as it gets tonight and there are still clothes spilling out of the hamper and crap all over the table, toys on the floor . . .

I find it easier then when I was a SAHM! Weekends are the worst.

DH and I have a manic time at 7pm. One of us does bedtime, which is usually fought against. The other one washes dishes, wipes surfaces, sweeps the floor in the living area and tidies up the worst of the toys. They live out on the floor, but in one area.

If there's washing to be done you can put that in the machine at night and turn on the machine in the morning. Hang it out when you can - DS likes handing me pegs so he "helps". DH puts his own clothes away, I put DS's away when he's in his bath. TBH my clothes and DH's clothes tend to go from the clean basket to being worn without going away a lot of the time.

Basket for paperwork that needs to get done - and sort it out one evening every week or every other week.

BTW, DH is out the house 7am-6pm weekdays, I leave at 8am but study full-time so often don't finish until well after DS is in bed, only I study at home. I also cook a nutritious meal at least half the nights - the other half we'll just have something easy, like tonight it's sausage, mash and veg. Tuesday I'm planning on fish and chips to maximise revision time for Wednesday morning's exam. But I do cook proper meals with fresh food half the time!

TBH, I'd rather have a half-hour less relaxation than have a house that didn't invite me to relax. I find I do a lot better with a neat house. Or at least neat living space: we're in the middle of renos atm so that house is a bit of a tip, but it's a tip that's causing the minimal mess possible.

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I don't keep on top of the housework lol!

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:yeahthat:

We are in a bit of a different boat as we have older children who 'should' be helping... having said that they weren't & DH & I decided it was too stressful nagging them all the time, so we canned their pocket money & said, right, we'll do it ourselves.

At that stage I was still working roughly 37 hrs /week (I have since cut back to about 32 at this stage of my pregnancy, and some of that is at home)...and yeah it's hard!

Most of it gets left for the weekend, we just do what we can at night. Occasionally I will sweep the floor or whatever, but usually it's just dishes, washing & mess, if we can keep on top of that we are doing well. We just prioritise what needs doing vs our rest & relaxation time.

And I don't (anymore) stress too much about what others think. It's different if I know we have people coming, I will try to get things sorted but if they drop in on a mess, well that's just how you find us :)

I dread to think what will happen after bub gets here and I go back to work!

But I think the best rule to live by is go with what you can live with..if you need it tidy to be able to relax (and it does make it easier for sure) then do it...but don't kill yourself with housework for the sake of others (I used to).

Most working mothers are in the same boat. Actually, so was I before I was working...so let me amend that - most mothers are in the same boat :lol:

Good luck finding a way to keep on top of your housework because I'm yet to find a way to keep my house respectable. We are like RF. One of us done the bath/dress while the other does the dishes/kitchen. We both put the toys away after DD has gone to bed. I try to do washing every second day to keep on top of that. Bathrooms get wiped over when being used like I clean DD's when she is having a bath. Realistically I try to vacuum during the week but it usually ends up a weekend job. My whole house gets cleaned over the weekend while DH is here to distract DD.
Just do the best you can that's all we can do isn't it???

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I have a philosophy; it doesn't matter if the house is messy as long as it's not dirty. Even if there are clothes and toys all over the floors I try to have all the rubbish in the bin, spills cleaned up, dirty clothes in the washing basket, dishes done etc. Then when I get time and energy to do more, I do. My house is about as clean as it gets tonight and there are still clothes spilling out of the hamper and crap all over the table, toys on the floor . . .

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Yep! this was my aim as well! i worked 25 hours a week/4 nights.
as long as there are no dirty dishes around the house, leftover food in the bin, and rubbish bags taken out, dishes done (or at least rinsed and stacked neatly!) im happy. also clothes. i try to wash everyday, so i tend to do a quick clothes pick up forst thing in the morning. anything else is a bonus!
i find that i can spend all day cleaning and tidying.... only to have a clean but messy house by the end of the day!

I find it's harder now that I'm at home....just do one job/room/task each night. Then there's rarely much on the weekend except washing. Even that can be done in chunks if you have an airer.
That said I don't have much interest in the TV, so if everyone else is distracted by it, I liked to do a few jobs so I didn't have to do them on my days off.
Oh and often I would cook a few meals on Sundays so that the weeknights weren't so hard.

We're the same - not too bothered about mess, as long as the house is clean.

I work from home so in some ways it makes things easier but DS is a very light sleeper so it limits what I can do while he sleeps.

The evening rush is hammer time for housework. DH plays with DS and baths him while I do the dinner/dishes/clean-up runaround. It works well - we both collapse on the couch once DS is asleep.

I also do at least one load of washing per day.

I've found asking someone to come around once per week to look after DS helps me to do the 'once over' on the bathroom, toilet, floors etc. Can't always happen though so we just manage the best we can - no-one is dying from poor sanitation so we're ok I think!

We do things like tidy the lounge before we watch TV for the night .. the kitchen gets done while I'm cooking tea (so usually a night behind all the time) and the bathroom about every 3 days. Washing I try to do 2 loads a night - one load's in the machine and another in the dryer at all times! we also have a cleaning lady, just 2 hours / week but it really helps, and I'd rather have her than bought lunch every day!

damn it, wrote a long reply and then DD decides to slam the comp shut

Anyway, I work full time too. 12+ a day (lucky 2 days from home)
On the other days, mum looks after DD at my house so she sweeps the floor.

I think it really comes down to what can be left unclean. Like the other ladies, trash will always be taken out, dishes washed before bed.

I wash the clothes in the wee-hrs of night as our washing machine sucks, then put them out early before i go to work (in the dark now!) Or leave them for the weekend.

I use to have to pack DD's toys up before i go to bed, now i just leave them and tidy a bit since she will pull everything out tomorrow anyway.

Havent vacuumed in ages, havent wiped the walls in ages and havent cleaned the garden in ages but im happy with that since spending time with DD is more important.

best of luck and hope you find some solution soon =)

Wow, I imagined that everyone except me had perfect houses! This does remind me that I really must do something about my bathroom :redface:

Hey, where'd my reply go? Just wanted to add that everyone with a lazy DP needs to give him in a kick in the butt! Working and mothering is hard enough! I think DPs can cope with the bulk of the housework if you do the bulk of the parenting ;)

I work fulltime, sometimes away. And I'm single (although living with my folks atm).

I did a post in another thread about my "routine", which works for me and two kids (aged 6 and 3). I'll try to find it.

I don't, lol!

I try to do one room properly each day, so today is monday and the lounge room and dining room are on the agenda. I am half way through folding all of the clothes on the dining table (where DH has dumped all of the clothes I washed yesterday instead of folding them, before he went away for four days :rolleyes:). Don't know if the lounge room will get done properly (things like dusting and sweeping under the furniture usually go by the wayside). But it will get tidied up well. I do one of the bedrooms, one bathroom, hallway/laundry, mopping/sweeping/vacuuming. Kitchen is done daily usually.
I refuse to give up my me time when the kids are in bed. It is the only time I get to myself. To do stuff I want- watch tv, read, go on the net, eat in peace, have a bath if I want and for DH and I to spend time together.
I also try make sure I wash the dishes and do a load of washing/folding/putting away of clothes each day, otherwise it gets to where it is today- a HUGE pile of clothes on the dining table calling my name, as well as last nights and today's dishes in the sink. If I can keep on top of the clothes and dishes, then the place kind of seems clean to me, lol! I tidy the toys at night I go to bed. But my place is far from what I would call tidy. It is clean, but never tidy. Is that even possible with kids??

Actually, I like it that DH takes DS out on a weekend for 2-3 hours so I can get the housework done properly like vacuuming under the sofas. Happens once every about 3 weeks, and I really don't mind that. DH has the option of cleaning or playing, I don't mind either. DH usually has a preference for one or the other on that day. Not happening atm due to renos, but in a way it is as I'm taking DS out for the whole day so DH can get the work done.

So we share housework and parenting. And seem to enjoy it.

RH - I'm in the same boat, I take Pip out each weekend so DH can do renos, it means that when we're home on the weekend I am only home when he's asleep ... so can't do loud things!
Doh! Hence why the cleaner ...

I shouldn't be posting in here because I haven't found the secret! We keep on top of dishes, clothes and the kitchen (which if you saw our kitchen is no mean feat!) BUT I can't tell you the last time I properly mopped the floors. If I can't tell that it's dirty then it ain't in my opinion. Sure I will wipe off food DD flings from the high chair but day-to-day dirt that I can easily ignore, I will.

I can't stand stuff on rugs and carpets though and bought a cordless vacuum cleaner. I have a dodgy back so big vacuum cleaners are just too heavy for me and the cordless one is BRILLIANT. No messing about lugging it out of a cupboard and plugging in, you just grab the cordless and things look presentable very quickly. I'm so in love with the thing, I often use it three times a day and marvel at my new-found domesticity.

I would really like a more tidy home but given that DP and I are both quite messy and we currently have very limited storage space, that's a work in progress.

Like someone else has said ... just work out what's essential for you. For me, it's a cleared kitchen bench (so I can cook), clean dishes and vacuumed rugs/carpets in the bedroom plus dirty clothes in the hamper and folded clothes in another hamper or ideally put away.

If someone forensically tested my hard floors, I'd fail miserably but ya know what ... DD has been to the doctors once in two years so I'm all for the dirt building immunity argument.

I am a self confessed clean-a-holic.

I worked 38 hours until recently, which i have now reduced to 30 hours per week.

I prepare my dinner from the night before, so i am always one day ahead.

Wash all the dishes before going to bed.

Always do a load of washing every night and hang to dry (whether it be inside on the clothes horse or outside if it's going to be a nice day the next day).

I iron once a week (in the evening whilst waching tv)

Vacuum everyday after dinner. I must vacuum everyday.

Clean the toilets once every 2-3 days, clean the baths, sinks and showers once a week.

Mop the timber once every fortnight.

Make the beds straight after arriving home from work.

Help with DS's homework whilst preparing tomorrow night's dinner.

I threaten DS to pack his toys away or they end up in the bin.

I am constantly doing something ar home. I never sit or relax. DH is fantastic too. He helps me with the chores. I usually do the bulk of my chores on my day off or on the weekend. DH never used to help me but with constant nagging he's turned out to be a gem. i like seeing my house like a display home.

We are a work in progress on learning a routine, but we are getting there. DH likes to read a book or watch TV (especially if Top Gear is on :rolleyes:) for an hour after the girls go to bed to de-stress from the day, and then he gets right into the cleaning. The first thing he does is load the dishwasher, and then he loads the washing machine. While they are running he cleans the toys up and all those other bits and pieces that accumulate. I have written a list of what *should* be done and how often it needs to be done, like the daily, weekly and monthy chores. When I am back on my feet the chores should be much quicker to get done, as when DH is doing them I am inspired to do them.

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I am a self confessed clean-a-holic.

I worked 38 hours until recently, which i have now reduced to 30 hours per week.

I prepare my dinner from the night before, so i am always one day ahead.

Wash all the dishes before going to bed.

Always do a load of washing every night and hang to dry (whether it be inside on the clothes horse or outside if it's going to be a nice day the next day).

I iron once a week (in the evening whilst waching tv)

Vacuum everyday after dinner. I must vacuum everyday.

Clean the toilets once every 2-3 days, clean the baths, sinks and showers once a week.

Mop the timber once every fortnight.

Make the beds straight after arriving home from work.

Help with DS's homework whilst preparing tomorrow night's dinner.

I threaten DS to pack his toys away or they end up in the bin.

I am constantly doing something ar home. I never sit or relax. DH is fantastic too. He helps me with the chores. I usually do the bulk of my chores on my day off or on the weekend. DH never used to help me but with constant nagging he's turned out to be a gem. i like seeing my house like a display home.

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Can I adopt you? :lol:

I am going to try and clean the bathroom while DD is having her bath at night and tidy up the lounge while watching TV. I decided that starting tonight I'm going to get DD to "help" me pack up her toys in the lounge (that's where they live) before her bath.

I think TBH the clutter in my house is too far gone now. We're moving as soon as we have enough money for a bond or in October (whichever comes first) so when we are in a new home I'll start fresh.

I recently bought DD (22 months) a little basket for her to carry and collect her toys into. I turn it into a game.

DD also helps me out! She can say "help, help". She helps me hang the wet clothes up to dry by giving me a peg or giving me the pieces of garments to hang. She carries the peg basket in and i carry the laundry basket. She also helps me put the dry clothes in the laundry basket when i get them off the line.

She helps me empty out the dishwasher, by giving me the plates and cups to put away (from the dishwasher).

You have to train them whilst their young ;)

I told DH that starting tonight I'm going to start teaching DD to pack up her toys before bathtime. I'm expecting for the first while she'll pull toys out as I put them away.

Good on you Danni. If you persist, Jazz will soon learn. They are smart little creatures!

Yes in deed they are. I'm thinking about giving her the duster today. Then again, she's sick and I don't think dust flying around will be a good idea.

Excellent!

i give DD a rag when i do the dusting too. She sprays the windex onto the coffee table and starts wiping it down just like mummy does.

DD gives me the next piece of clothes to iron when i'm ironing. I'm thinking of buy her a toy ironing board and iron.

Just ask Jazz if she wants to "help" mummy ALL the time (when you do something) and try and get her involved. DD has a broom which she uses when i vacuum.

Of course i can't guarantee that they'll help us when they're teenagers though ;)

I book myself each Thursday night for 3 hours to do the housework. I throw washing in every morning and either put it the dryer that night or hang it outside. Kitchen is cleaned every night.