Bring out your best poo stories!

Because it seems that there's nothing better to do as a mother than compare notes on your baby's bowel motions... Your most amusing/entertaining/gross poo stories...

We had one today... Sam has just discovered his penis... every time his nappy is off he just grabs for it (and some of the things he does with it look sooo painful!), so as you can imagine, nappy changes are getting interesting.

Today, his poo smooshed forwards all over his penis, his scrotum, all up the sides... ick! Of course, he grabbed for it, poo and all and got a hand right in there... clean up the hand and give him something to hold on to in order to distract him... worked a bit, kept his hands out of it, unfortunately, I gave him the tube of bum cream and he knows what it's for and decided to be helpful and put the tube where it belongs... in the poo! Nice try, but I can do without that sort of helpfulness, thanks. It was a major battle to keep his hands out of his mouth when they weren't in the poo - I guess this is why DH refuses to change dirty nappies solo and always yells for me to help.

We got there in the end, bum clean, hands clean... and I even used the alcohol sanitiser on his hands afterwards as he'd decided to fill his nappy in the middle of lunch (self-feeding time, vegemite toast).

Speaking of vegemite toast - theres nothing more disturbing than changing a dirty nappy after lunch and finding what you *hope* is vegemite smears on your baby's hands as you were fairly sure he didn't get his hands in there while you were changing him...

BW

hahahahaah!! ahhh he's a treasure. I don't have a poo story of my own (well nothing interesting unless bath time poos are interesting!) but my sister was changing her first born one night at 4am - in the semi darkness, and she couldn't see if she had got everything - leaned closer for a better look - and BAM - right in the face, hair, pj's, bed - with new poo

PMSL...

ahhh.. it was worth her waking me up at 4am with the shrieks of disgust coming from her for the years of enjoyment I've had out of that story ...

teeheehee

:rofl: these are so funny.

Dunno if I should be sharing this BUT my Aunty was changing me one day and left the nappy a little close and I grabbed a handful and yup you guess where it ended up alright :redface::lol:

I had my long hair fall into a pooey nappy once :sick:

Mine is not as funny but when DD was like 8mths or so i was practising elimination communication.

She had that straining look so i quickly took her to the toilet. Somehow my hands got into her poo and i was reaching the toilet paper with one hand (holding DD in the other) and some poo smudged into the wall.

I didnt realise until my friend came over and said why is there dried poo on the walls!

Both my dd were projectile pooers from day 1 (well mabye day 3 when the mecconium was out their systems)

I was at a gf's house before a family dinner one day and needed to change dd1's wet nappy, she was 6 weeks old. I put down the mat and started the change someone spoke to me as I was changing her so I turned my head and bam she squirted poo all over my head and the side of my face, my hair and clothes. All the guys bolted, I left df to clean up and ran into my gf's shower. I was very graateful my mouth was shut for once

DD'2 was a middle of the night poo, I was changing her in her bassinett with a change matt under her butt, leant over to get a wipe and she pooed straight over the top of my shoulder and it landed on my bed and pillow! Had to change all our bedding

DD1 was really interested in my changing dd2's dirty nappies until the day she got poo in her hair when dd2 decided to share the love with her sister.

Thank god for solids and solid poos!

Oh this is mine, but I'll just link you to it on my blog here This is the worst one i've had and it waited until #3 to come along!

:rofl: think I would have just gone out & bought a universal remote & sent that one to the bin!

We've had a few but nothing major, Charlie did his first black poop all over the nurse from neck down just after he was born & she was checking him over. Funniest thing was she claimed it's the frist time it's ever happened to her!! That's my boy.

We've had a few on the floor when it's been a nappy free time but he never plays in it...luckily. The other day we were outside together when I remembered he didn't have a nappy on as he stood up & said "bye bye wee's" as he was weeing through his shorts onto the deck. I quickly grabbed him away so he didn't step in it & ripped off his shorts not realising he'd done no 2 also, it rolled everywhere....some on his shoe, my socks eeewww was gross.

Best was a friends little girl who around 2.5 was learing to toilet train & didn't like the no 2 in her pants...............after being quiet for some time here father checked on her & ther was poop everywhere, on the carpet, walls, bed, her hair :D. She had apparantly rubbed her bum along the carpet like a dog when it scratches theirs just to get all the poop off as she was trying to wipe if off,he,he. They had to pay a carpet cleaner & he said it still smelt of poop for days after!

I only had poop up the boys backs - it used to fly out !

My nephew in QLD used to play in his room for a while once he woke. He used to be in there for a while cause BIL and SIL were sleeping....anyway everyday he used to poop when he woke and would then take off his nappy and would use the poop as paint. White curtains, white bed linen, toys, cupboards, cream carpet etc. This went on for weeks...finally they figured out that maybe they should get up when he woke up. It was gross but it made me laugh...:lol:

Good thread !

I too have been a victim of the projectile middle-of-the-night poo.
My DD was 3 days old and she woke for a feed early hours of the morning. So not to wake my ex up, I turned on our lamp and attempted her nappy change in the little light the lamp was putting out. I took her nappy off, wiped her clean and then had to reach down to the 2nd shelf of the change table to get a nappy. When my head was at the perfect level DD decided it was perfect time to projectile poo all over my face & hair. My ex is a really heavy sleeper and I was calling out to him and kicking the bed at the same time, trying to get him to wake. Nothing I did worked so I continued with the nappy change, dressed DD in clean clothes and put her in her bassinette and then tore off to the bathroom to finally clean myself up! Urgh... remembering it makes me feel sick! lol

Well, when DD was in hospital after being born, in the neonate section at only about 1 week old. I arrived and started changing her nappy. I opened up her nappy and started to wipe...then I got showered with poo, it sprayed about a metre and a half, all over me, the floor and some on the walls too...so glad it was the hospital and not home!

I just cracked up laughing...less than 1 minute after it happening my mum arrived at the hospital, took one look at me, the floor and the walls and just about fell on the floor with laughter. The nurses finished changing DD and mum went up to her and gave her a big kiss and said..."that serves your mummy right for doing that to me when she was a baby"...mum's revenge!

Here's mine... http://forums.bellybelly.com.au/foru...91&ppuser=8407

Picture says a thousand words really LOL!

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Here's mine... http://forums.bellybelly.com.au/foru...91&ppuser=8407

Picture says a thousand words really LOL!

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Ewwwww. I love the look on your face! :lol:

Gee I am glad I haven't had projectile pooers!!

When my parents were staying with us a few months back DS1 was running around without his nappy after his shower. He went into the 'guest' room which is normally his room and did a poo on my dad's suitcase. :oops: Well the bulk was on the suitcase, the little bit that falls off after landed right on the edge of a book on the floor and somehow it managed to get up inside the spine. :doh: You would think my father hadn't had children of his own from his reaction. What a sook! :lol:

DS1 has also recently taken to sticking his hand down the back of his nappy when he has done a poo and then shoving his pooey hand up at you and saying 'ooh gross'. I hope toilet training doesn't take much longer!!

Thanks for the laughs! I needed it after today.

We also had a poo explosion in SCN. At one of the middle of the night feeds, the nurse was changing another baby and got a lovely explosive poo during it. I laughed, as you do, but Sam got me back later by doing the same thing to me. Later that same day, the third baby in SCN decided to spray her parents as well.

And when it comes to poo up the back of the nappy - only happened once here. But it happened when I was on the way to an appointment with my GP. I'd been squeezed in, and Sam had pooped in the car, it squooshed up the back of his nappy, getting all over every stitch of clothing he was wearing... I'd nearly not taken the nappy bag, and hadn't checked it for supplies, but was lucky to have enough wipes, a nappy a spare outfit and enough nappy sacks to contain the soiled clothing. Only problem is that in cleaning up Sam I was becoming late for my squeezed in urgent appointment so I managed to get him in a singlet, wrapped him in a blanket and raced in to the doctors surgery so they knew I was there. I'm sure it was a good luck running around in the middle of winter with a baby only in singlet and nappy!

BW

Another explosive poo victim here :redface:!

Just last Friday in fact, in the middle of a nappy change when the poo started sliding out of his butt, so I (thought I was smart) and used a nappy wipe to place under his butt as DF had already binned the old nappy. Then I hear a little fart, and something came over me - I stepped back and with the next fart there was 'follow thru' - it landed all over my t-shirt, slid down my right leg and what poo didn't stick to me fell to the floor!

OMG I totally forgot about the time DS did a projectile poo on me! what made it so gross was he was around 16months old!!!!!!!!! eeeeekkk...........he was lying on the change table when I did the usual lift of the legs & out it came like someone just turned on a hose. All over me & I was jumping up & down screaming. DH thought it was sooooo funny!!

Also when my Sis & BIL came to visit, she was 7months pg with her first bubs....so they looked after DS for a few hrs one day whilst I worked. He did a poo & neither wanted to change it, but after 10mins couldn't stand the smell LOL. BIL said "here, I'll change it that stinks".....went & lay him down on change table, opened up nappy.....screamed & ran!!! LOL.......whilst my sister is yelling "you can't leave a baby on the change table". Too funny.

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Oh this is mine, but I'll just link you to it on my blog here This is the worst one i've had and it waited until #3 to come along!

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:o - that reminds me of my sisters #3 DS smearing his lovely poo in their just decorated xmas Tree!

Baaaaaaaaahahahaha nothing like a good old poo story to cheer you up!!:ROFL:

A poo stories I have quite a few

Ds1 was only a week old and I put him on the change table to change him. While the nappy was off he peed all over himself and my hands, then he pooped a great poop at me and it hit the wall behind me and landed on the carpet. Dh was a great help. He fell over in the doorway laughing at us lol

Ds2 was 3 weeks old. I decided to attempt a walk with my 2 sons for the first time on my own. I failed to check the nappy bag (big mistake) I got down to the beach and we were sitting there enjoying the view when Ds2 decided he was going to do a massive poo. Nappy bag had no nappies and only one wipe. Poor child had poo up to his neck literally. I cleaned him as best as I could and wrapped him in a blanket and walked home promising myself to never ever leave the house unprepared again lol

Ds3 was 3 months old. We had just bought some beautiful new couches. Had them a week, He did a huge poosplosion. It was ll over me, him and the couch. I jumped up and I was dripping in poo and it was going all over the floor. Yet again Dh was a wonderful help. He laughed and laughed till he snorted.

DD apparently gets the poops when Daddy bathes her because without fail she poops in the bath 99% of the time. hehehe.. revenge is sweet I stand there and laugh while he dry retches

Well I've had a number of poo stories at work. My least favourites are the ones where you pull out the back of the nappy with one finger to have a look for a poo and get a long fingernail full!!! EWWWW.
I had an atomic pooer last week- bub was on antibiotics which notoriously make things runny. Anyway I checked him - very narrowly avoided the above and it was everywhere. All up his back to almost his shoulders, out the legs of the nappy inside his onesie, a bit up the tummy. It was a bath job for sure!

Oh, then my favourite, I just remember. One year old girl was playing outside, carer smelled something, baby was wearing loose trackies. Carer pulled back of nappy and trackies to check, and plop, very large solid chunk of poo fell out of leg of nappy and down trackie leg onto ground. It was the funniest thing I've ever seen and we all were in histerics.

And one final one - I walked into the bathroom to discover Miss 3 with the small plastic hand mirror (from the hair brush set we have to tidy up after rest time), holding it behind her bottom as she bent over trying to look in it. "What are you doing xx" - 'I'm trying to see if I got all the poo off' - soo funny and cute too.

I had the projectile poo too when DD1 was only few weeks old. Lifted her legs to change her and squirt, all over me the change table the wall the floor, it went everywhere. Thank god Df was home I didn't know where to start with the clean up. Luckily too we'd already booked for carpets to be steam cleaned the next day!

My poo story is referred to as the 'Bunnings Incident'.

DH, DS and I were at Bunnings one weekend looking at paint. I was holding DS when I heard and felt some 'butt rumbles'. I thought nothing more of it, until suddenly DH pointed out some sloppy poo that had dripped onto the floor. I held DS out, and there was poo starting to stain his pants. DH used the spit up cloth we had with us to wipe the poo off the floor, then we quickly went out of Bunnings to go and change DS in the car. The poo had stained everything he was wearing, and had run down his legs... but then I got to his nappy and there was hardly any poo in the nappy!!! I think most of it had escaped the nappy! :rolleyes: Fun, fun, fun.

Teehehehehehe thats my little sister Danni LOL!

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Teehehehehehe thats my little sister Danni LOL!

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:redface:
Sorry.
Actually, the fact that it was your sister and not you just makes it even more funny...for you I guess.

Heheheehe, these are funny!!

On the day we bought DS home from hospital, DH was being helpful and changing Bailey after a feed, (he put Bailey on the couch and was kneeling on the floor himself), you'd think it would have been an easy nappy change as there was only wee, and Bailey started to wee some more as Dad was changing his nappy so Dad quickly covered his 'firehose' with the new nappy, only to have Bailey then aim a poo-plosion all over Dads front. Poor Dad was holding a 'wet' nappy in each hand and was covered in poo on his shirt and called me for help. HAHAHAHAHAHA Talk about a 'welcome home' :ROFL:

I have a few. Eldest DD was a projectile poo-er. She squirted all up the wall near the change table on several occassions.

Little DD went through an obsessive poo stage once. She rolled her poo up into little balls and had a poo ball in all my shoes. Like 10shoes had a poo ball in. I could smell it but couldn't find it for ages although I knew she had being playing in it as her hands were covered in it. She also ate it on several occassions and had poo stuck in her teeth (she has gappy teeth totally disgusting)

But the funniest and most embarrassing one was when we were at ALDI and were travelling and DD poo-ed. I had to change her in the parking lot and as I was doing it her poo was hard and round and rolled out of the car and onto the foot path. I didn't realise at first till I noticed the old nappy didn't have a poo in it and when I went looking for it I witnessed a lady step into it and it got stuck to her shoe. I quickly got in the car and told my mother to drive off quickly whilst trying not to laugh and being very embarrassed. The poo rolled towards the back of the lady's car parked next to ours so she didn't see it as she walked around the boot and trod in it. She didnt notice straight away. I was so embarrassed as I would have scooped it back up if she hadn't trod in it. So eeewww

After reading all these stories, I am sooooo grateful to have never encountered a projectile poo...

My story is - when DD was trying out a big bed for the first time at about 18m, I always had to be careful opening her door after she'd been down for a nap because she tended to wait right behind it. So I opened it slowly one day as normal and could smell right away that things weren't right, and could see her face peeking around the door. So I pushed it open a little further to get my head in, and there was the pile sitting neatly right behind the door, and DD smiling sweetly with brown on her hands, face, chest....
I had no choice but to push the door open through the pile of poo to get in. Needless to say, it wasn't a pleasant clean up job.

Well I have a few too. But the best (or is that worst?) was when DS1 was 2 1/2, and DS2 would have been 1. DS1 was going through a phase of pooing in his pants and then taking it out. Everything else I had tried wasn't working, so I tried not giving him any attention - not commenting, just cleaning up without a word. He decided to up the ante - he waited till I left the room for a couple of minutes, pooed, took it out and smeared it all over everything - walls, floor, toys, books and his brother!! When I walked in he said "look, sunscreen!" - and I burst into tears. The worst thing was the scale of it - and the fact that he'd smeared it on the bean bag I had just washed. It had literally taken hours to get all the beans out and back in again and there it was dirty again within a day :(

DS1 just gave me reason to revisit this thread.
I was downstairs putting a load of washing on and he came downstairs without his nappy on and poo all over his bum and the backs of his legs. I wasn't fast enough to grab him and he turned laughing and headed back up the stairs, but he can't reach the door handle from outside so went through the catdoor. Not very pretty to watch with all the poo:lol: but the poo also got all over the catdoor and some of the screen.:doh: I have just finished cleaning it off... not fun!