Husband Cutting the Cord???

First, not sure if this is the right place, but please move if its not.

So, I started writing my birth plan last week and put in it that I wanted DH to cut the cord. Just thought it was a given. Come to talking about birth plan in Birth Classes and DH says that he is not sure he can do it. Not that he doesnt want to but he said the thought of it is really weird to him. (Will spare you the TMI that he said :shock: ). I dont understand this, but the Birth Class teacher said she could.

Has anyone elses DH been like this about it. I dont want to push him but it would mean a lot to me if he does do it. Otherwise, would it be possible for myself to cut it?

Thanks

I would just leave it as flexible - perhaps put DH may like to cut the cord if possible - if not perhaps mum would like to cut the cord ;) He may change his mind when he is there; men go through an amazing transition after the birth of their baby, I love watching it. But he may also feel uneasy, so perhaps leave it an open thing for now. You can always change it later if he changes his mind, even when the midwives are on duty you can tell them then! All depends on the Ob.

Hi Emma,

My hubby was funny about cutting the cord too! Before the birth he said no way, as that was the doctors job - that is what we were paying them for, LOL!

But on the day, he was so overwhelmed with emotion of having seen his son born, that he probably lost his fear (of hurting me during the cutting) that he did it without even thinking about it. I think in retrospect if he hadn't he would be really sad about it now.

BTW, I think by the time they see the bub come out of 'there' and all the bits and bobs that go with it, cutting the cord is not only the least they thing they can do, but it is also the least messy, LOL!

Don't worry - as Kelly said leave it flexible, and mayble, like my hubby, it will be very different on the day!

Best of luck!

PS: About cutting the cord yourself - I don't know about others, but I was so exhausted, and so glad that he was out safely, that worrying about cutting the cord was the last thing on my mind. Besides when they put the baby on your chest, and they open their eyes and look at you, it is such an incredible moment that everything else just melts away....... (and you honestly don't really care what anyone else is doing around or to you - at least that is the way it was for me!)

Dh never wanted to cut the cord, and still doesn't when we have another one. He feels satisfied enough just watching them being born. Plus, he is too busy manning the camera!

ej

my dh cut the cord with our first two children, when i was in labour with my third i remember the midwife asking me if dh was gonig to cut the cord (dh wasn't there - it was all happening a bit to quick lol) he arrived 15mins before the birth and when our daughter was born and the midwife gave him the go ahead to cut the cord - he said he didn't really want to - he ummed and arhhed for a bit and then he said okay i will cut it - don't know what it was all about and i have never asked him why he felt like this when he didn't mind one bit with the other two - the only thing i can think of was that it was such a fast labour and birth and all quite unexpected from him. i must ask him tonight the reason why he originally thought no he wouldn't.

if we happen to fall prg again - and we are trying sooooooo hard lol then i think i will ask if i can cut the cord seeing as it will no doubt be our last baby.

i agree with kelly - keep the options open and just see what happens at the time.

I never thought about me actualy cutting the cord. But i think I will leave it for Dh to do. He seems to really look forward to doing his little part in bring them into the world. hey maybe this time round he may even like to diliver the baby!

EJ hun, I think that DH will be elated when your little miracle arrives that he'll forget about how he feels, knowing that it doesn't hurt you or the baby to cut the cord, that he'll do it as it's really the only thing that in my opinion gets them really involved, I mean we've carried them, birthed them and then the final thing they do it cut the cord, I'll think he'll jump at the chance.

Good luck sweety, hope it the birth that is goes well and QUICK for you...

I've already asked my DH if he will cut the cord for me, since he's done it with 2 of his 3 previous children (wasn't there for baby 3 - didn't even know about baby 3 until after the birth), he says he will happily do that for us.

I'm starting to look at things like that, who will do what in the delivery room and who I want in there - we're not pregnant yet, I'm a project coordinator it is my job to be over organised!!!!!

Schaz

Do you think its the blood that bothers him? My husband cut Seth's cord after the cord had been left to pulsate so the cord didn't bleed when he cut it, do you think that would help your DH?

If he's worried about the sensation I've heard its similar to cutting through a piece of licorice.

But as Kelly says try not to worry about it, the whole thing and take it as it comes, and yes if DH doesn't cut the cord there is no reason why you can't. Just discuss it with your OB first so he/she knows its what you want at the time.

*hugs*
Cailin

Hi ej

I usually ask DH if he wants to cut the cord. Sometimes I think that they are Ssared of doing it wrong. I tell them that I will show them exactly where and when to cut. This often makes them feel ok about doing it. I also tell DH that neither the baby or mum can feel the cord being cut, just in case he is worried about hurting one of them. However some men still don’t want to do it so then I ask mum if she would like to cut the cord. I will usually try to have this discussion in the early stage of labour.

My dh didn't cut the cord with either of our kids as he did not want to be the one responsible for 'severing the bond between mother and baby' in a symbolic sort of way iykwim? I told him it wouldn't bother me but he still didn't want to be the one so the midwife did ds and my mum did Emmas.

My Dh doesn't want to cut the cord either so my sister will be, cause she's going to be there too. Also Dh has said he doesn't want to stand down that end, he thinks he'll be turned off sex forever!

My dh said he didn't want to cut the cord with baby #1, but then he ended up wanting to on the day. He did #2 as well.

My DH has said he does not want to cut the cord. He didn't really give a reason just that he doesn't think it's necessary :rolleyes: I'm not that worried if he doesn't want to, I just thought it would be a nice way to include him. I will see what actually happens on the day :D

Andrew wanted to cut the cord of Kameron, but come to the time he was so white and shaky there was no way he could have and even said "I don't think I can" so my mum cut it. At Lachlan's birth though he was first in line ;)

Love

My DH cut the cord, and reckons it was like calamari rings. LOL. It'll be interesting to see how he goes eating calamari rings from now on! The OB asked if he wanted to deliver the 2nd half of the baby, but DH was worried the baby would be too slippery and he'd drop him. He might do it next time tho, now that he knows the whole process a bit better.

Sadly my DH missed the birth of our son (he was born 5 days ago) as i had a 3hr labour and it was totally unexpected at 27 weeks.. The nurses told him to go home and get me some clothes and he was 10mins late (he's still upset), but they asked me if i wanted to cut it and i just couldn't as too many things were happening in my head.. :lol:

My DH cut the cords of our first two children and was mighty chuffed to do so!!

Then I cut the cord for our third child - was something I wanted to do and kinda symbolic for me I guess - last child and closure of sorts!!

Best wishes

My DH is very hospital and needle phobic. he doesnt think he could even be in the room with me netherlone cut the chord.

He already has my reassurance that its ok that he is not in the delivery room if he doesnt feel up to it. Better to relieve one partners anxiety than have 2 of us panicking at every minute. My Mum and support person will be in there with me.

Having said that, my birth plan will request that he is ASKED first before anyone else.

Hey, my husband nearly fainted while supporting (hmmm is that what you call it) me through me labour. All of a suuden we had midwives attending to HIM!! I take my SIL in with me now and luckily she is not squeamish at all.

HI,,
I think it was Christine who said her dh didn't want to be the one to 'sever ties between mama and baby'. My DH said the same thing. When our first child was born he happily took over the cutting duties. The cord does feel a lot like calamari rings, I would agree!

Our daughter was 5 and a bit when her brother was born and she was at the birth and she cut his cord. This has turned into a bit of a tradition as she has cut the cords of all her siblings since.

I always feel so exhausted and so relieved to have a healthy baby in my arms that I don't think I could manage the job.

Love Deb