Little advice please :)

Hi ladies'

Just wanted some advice on how to tackle baby names. I happen to like unusual names ( I named my first son Jett) at the moment if it's a boy I want to name him Foxx, Phoenix, Drake, Neo, or Colt, if it's a girl I'm thinking Matilda, Scarlett, Ebony, or Aurora. My problem is my new mother in law and my husband to be don't like unusual names (as my mother in law is Italian she wants an Italian family name like Leonardo or Costatina). I have had many a discussion with my mother in law on this issue, she thinks of the child being picked on in school. My argument is that kids get picked on for more things than names I was bullied for being skinny, having a British accent, poor parents and an old car.

Do I go with my new hormonal *****ier side and think 'well I've carried this child for 9 months so I'm going to name it what I want?' or do I be a doormat and succumb to family pressure? I just really don't like old boring names, some of those can be picked on too, Richard is shortened to ... well you know. Nobody made much of a fuss when we first heard Tiger Woods or Forrest Whitaker...

I've actually told my husband to be not to mention any of the names I'm thinking of in front of family anymore because I can't stand seeing the smirks and eye rolls on their faces. Why can't they just be happy that I have something to name at all, as it is their son's first child? Sorry I'm a little hormonal at the moment! Jett's grandparents love the unusual name, they think it suits him! (Jett has a different father to this baby) Anybody else have issues like this with family, if so how did you tackle it?

Any advice please :D

A boy in my class comes form an Italian family and his mum didn't like any of those really Italian names so they named him Maximus which is Italian but more unusual and interesting so what about an old style Roman name to please both of you??

I was just thinking about that very name this afternoon! I might have a google tonight and see if I can find something like that, she really wants a member of the family though, see what I can find :D Cheers for replying so quick :)

I think some of the old Italian names might be quite unique, MIL might have to settle for an Italian name you like if there isn't a family name you're keen on, sounds like a fair comment.

Personally I don't think I could name my baby something that I didn't like, good luck:goodluck:

IMO its none of your MiL's business and you don't need to please her - but your DH is entitled to some input - so if he is conservative with names I think you may need to compromise in some way.

I agree its your child you should name the baby what YOU and your partner want. And i have to say i love the names Scarlett and Foxx :)

I am one for trhinking its the role of the parents tp pick the names no one else!!

Thanks for all the comments guys :) Hubby to be does happen to like Neo and thats his only input so far lol he's still freaking out a little with the whole baby business although he did buy some baby Essendon socks the other day and a KISS onesie!

He's warming to Matilda too which I think is beautiful, the baby will have his Italian last name at least :/ See how I go in the next few weeks with Italian names, altho it is hard when you keep thinking back to the names you really love lol!

Its for that reason I refused to talk about baby names with anyone while I was pregnant!! I would just say we have a few in mind but we would be leaving it as a surprise for everyone.. if they pressed it I would just change the subject! Its totally your decision as the parents..

There are some pretty cool Italian names, if you do a google search a lot of the baby name sites have an Italian category.. could be worth a look.

I have had a bit of a google and looked at some of the Italian ones in the last few minutes, nothings popping out at me yet .. and jeez alot end in 'o'! :D

I agree with the others here, it's not one's choice on the bubs name but yours and the bubs daddy. But from the point of view that she will be in your life forever, what about an Italian family name as a middle name as a compromise?

Thats what hubby to be suggested, didn't go down to well we just got glares. :/ It's interesting how people can change when there is a baby involved!

What about Leo rather than leonardo.

Sybella


Personally I think its you and DH choice of name MIL has had her turn and picked what she wanted!

Hubby to be already has a cousin called Leonard, I didn't want to use my family names as they are Phyliss and Norman..not my cup of tea! She did have her turn and named my hubby to be James...not really an Italian name..or a family one..oh well we are keeping our suggestions to ourselves now :)

I agree with Feeb. MIL chose names for her own children, she should stay out of it.

Good luck with names though. Me and DH argued for ages...til week 38 actually!

Thanks for all the comments girls, onlyjoined 2day and you've all been so friendly! I just wanted to get that off my chest as it's been irking me for a few weeks! Once again, thanks for the comments and inputs I will think about everything that was said :) Might have to pull a name out of a hat in the end hehe:p

I think its nice to have some meaning like that behind the name, but I do not agree with you choosing a name to keep MIL happy!
I do think the idea of an Italian name you like could be nice.
I didn't use names that meant something here, my only plan was a name people have heard, but aren't too common, & I wanted 'cool' names & nick names.
I sometimes wish I'd searched more & found nice Gaelic names or something (My fam is Irish). I can't wait for SIL & my bro to have a bub...hanging to go through Maori(SIL) names! They are so beautiful!!

I have Swedish and British background, some of the Nordic names are nice but a little out there (like Thor and Freya) lol dammit!

I think someone got it spot on early in the replies......its YOUR child not your MIL. She has name her child/ren!
I'm sorry but I do not get along with my MIL so I always wonder why someone would do something to please them! also do you have family? Mother etc? Cause what makes her think she has all the say then, what if they have a traditonal name?

At the end of the day this is your child & you are the one who has to be happy with the name not your MIL. In regards to the father of the child then YES he should be happy with the name also, so perhaps you can come up with something together....just don't tell anyone else what.

Thanks Erin,

My family names are not really my cup of tea Phylliss, Norman, Frank, Bernard and Brenda. I'm not going to call my child any of the family names my MIL suggests as I really don't like them either. I've been looking for some other Italian names but I really can't find one that pops out at me. At the moment we are keeping all the names to ourselves my fiance like Neo for a boy so far, which is different and I like it too. I think he is a little scared of his mother to be honest, after all he's never lived out of home we are building our house at the moment only to find out MIL has bought land to build in the next street to us! Argh! It's like Everybody Loves Raymond! lol

If hubby to be can't think of a name by the time little one is born I am going to have to choose it myself, after all he won't be in the labour room as he has a weak stomach, and not comfortable with MIL or SIL being in there with me, they just don't feel like family, more like people I know.

I think it is definately up to the parents to choose a name and it's hard enough without people turning their noses up at your choices.

I agree with some of the girls maybe there is a compromise, google old italian names etc and see if there is something you like that you can say to MIL is part of their heritage.

No matter if it's family or friends there is always someone that will questions your choice, my BIL actually came out and told our cousin he HATES that name, how f*ing rude... so they went ahead and used it anyway and it suits their boy so much.
The same BIL called his daughter Eve and we were all allowed to call her Evie as soon as they had a boy named Alexander and he didn't ever want it shortened we were told he name is EVE not Evie and we were to stop calling her that.. funny how every b'day card and present we ever had was from EVIE up until that point.

Go with your gut, you will find the best choice for your little one.

Have to say I like Thor (Torr).
I grew up with a kid called Thor.

firtstly CONGRATULATIONSSS!
secondly- love the name Jett, that was on my short list of names :)
and thirdly i dont think it has ANYTHING to do with you MIL, name you baby what you want because there is no point in you being unhappy just to make MIL happy.
really as bad as its going to be at the start she will eventually get over it! right?

but i do think there are some really cute italian based names (my mother is italian) she wanted me to name my son something italian based instead she is about to recieve a grandson by the name of Oscar haha and my family has tried and tried to put me of the name by reminding me of oscar the grouch etc... but just ignore them :)

i have a few cute (italian) names

girls

Arianna.
Mia.
Isabella.
Zaira.
Elena.
Amalia.
Aida.
Allegra
Lucy

boys

Dante.
Lucca.
Matteo.
Rocco.
Antonio.
Romeo.
Orlando.

hope this helps you a little:)
goodluck x

i dont tell ppl the names till baby is named that way its tuff luck, i dont care what family think of names its our child so i go with what i want but just to stir the pot we will be telling mother inlaw that if our baby is a boy we will name him after my uncle Wolfgang lol

I've always been a strong believer that a child's name needs to be chosen by BOTH parents ... even if you are the one carrying the child for 9mths and giving birth BUT like my DP pointed out to me that he and some other men kind of wish they too could experience what we get to have in being pregnant (maybe not the birth part, LOL) ... so if you want an unusual name & your future hubby an Italian name i truely like MrsMac suggested you could come up with a gorgeous unusual sounding Italian name :dance:

P.S - I too agree that you both don't tell anyone of the chosen name !! We chose an unusual name for our DD & didn't tell a sole cause if we did we wouldn't have been able to handle the rolled eyes or sniggers too and didn't want anything putting us off the name either. NO one is game enough to roll their eyes when the bub is here, LOL ;)

How irritating! I feel for you my IL's are Greek and my BIL STILL asks who my girls are named after :rolleyes:. It was expected we would name any children after MIL/FIL - and none after my family...grrrh. We compromised with DD1 and used MIL's name as a middle name and a greek first name. However DD2's name is of Hebrew origin and they still can't/won't say it correctly.
Just make sure you and your DP are on the same page. It certainly was the beginning of us being a separate family unit in some ways. Having said that it can be quite a stressful thing, sounds silly unless you have been there. Good luck!
PS - This is just my experience of my IL's no offence intended to anyone else! :)

ETA - I also agree with keeping names quiet until bubs has arrived - then they are who they are IYKWIM, no discussions entered into....