How to get rid of the stinking dummy!!

After having spent the day at sleep school yesterday with DS who is 9 weeks old and being told that he is completely dependant on his dummy to go to sleep which I need to hit on the head now before it causes too many problems. My poor little man will not sleep for more than 30 minutes without me putting his dummy back in so as you can imagine I'm just plain exhausted and at my wits end. My DD is 2 and is also completely dependant on her dummy to go to bed.
I've been sitting her all day thinking about how I can get dummies off my two kiddies. So I'm once again asking for some advice, tips, help on how to get rid of my kids dummies. I'm thinking of doing them both at once and just having one shocking time over doing them individually.
So hit me with your ideas/suggestions please. I need some major help!!

TIA,
A very sleep deprieved and desperate Dan.

mmm i was the opposite. the dummy soothed DD enough that i wouldnt mind getting up through the the night to put it back it. If it meant she was comforted without me or my boob lol then i was happy to let her have the dummy.

Even if she had it to sleep now at 2 i wouldnt mind but we took it away at 20 months as we knew she didnt need it anymore.

I took DS dummy away as he wouldnt take to it very well when he was 4 weeks and now he is a thumb sucker. He sucks his thumb to soothe and fall asleep.

People again tell me to tie his thumb down, put things on it to make it taste yukky blah blah,, they are babies and used to be in the womb where is it safe and warm and now they are put in another bed with no contact and are expected to sleep without any way to self soothe or comfort themselves


I know my post hasnt been what you wanted and im sorry.
But if it isnt the dummy i just feel it will be something else, a toy, a blanket, music etc.

As for your 2yo. the way we ridded the dummy finally was we planned a trip away. And we 'forgot' it. And in the mean time got rid of all of them in the house so she wouldnt find them.

We were away 4 nights and even though she was out of sorts not being in her environment when we got back she never asked for it.

HTH

xx

It really wasnt too bad for us to get rid of Miss B's dummy thank goodness cause i have heard some horror stories!
We just went cold turkey - we were over having to get up in the middle of the night constantly to put it back in! i hated the dummy in the first place so was prepared for whatever it took to get rid of it!
She only ever had if for bed time or when whingy! One night we just said no more - and never looked back!
I think she was a bit whingy the first night and maybe a little the second but by 3rd and ever since she has been fine! She sleeps with a raggy doll thing with silk on one side and a rabbits head and she sucks on that if she wants to suck on anything!
Goodluck with it - once its gone its gone - and i think getting rid of them is worth anything u may go thru!

For DS you could replace it with a snuggle blankie, that he can cuddle and/or suck if he wants. He so young, he should adjust fairly quick....
With DD, I have never seen this fail so far...... buy her a little something nice, a favorite character toy, and put it up. Tell her when she's ready to throw out all the dummies herself, she gets her prize. Throwing it out themselves help them remember where it went, and makes it their own responsibilty thats its gone.

Good luck babe.....

haven't read the responses, but i also had to replace my dd's dummy when she was a baby every 45 minutes, it was torture.... i got rid of it when she was around 4-5 months from memory.... you just have to go cold turkey, at 9 weeks there is obviously no explaining to do, there will be a few hard nights for him to get used to it, but since you are up every 30 minutes it really won't be that much harder... after a few nights they forget, honest... just do it and go from there.

now your 2 year old is another story... you're going to have to think up one of those fanciful stories to get her to want to give her dummy away, then once its done thats it, no going back!! good luck! i dare say it will be easier with the baby, as its actually up to you just to do it, and once you've bitten the bullet and made the decision to do it, then thats it done and you just have to get through those first few days trying different ways to get him to settle.......

your toddler is going to remember, you'll have to be strong!

I'm not sure about your DS but for your DD, you could try the dummy fairy. SIL did this with her daughter. She explained that the day after her 2nd birthday the dummy fairy would come to collect all her dummies because she's a big girl now and doesn't need them. Her DD left all her dummies out for the dummy fairy who left her a nice little pressie. SIL said that her DD was a bit lost for the first few nights, cried out a few times, etc but then after that she never looked back.

Did they say the dummy was the reason he wasn't sleeping?

My only suggestion is to go 'cold turkey', a 9 week old won't understand when you tell him it's lost or the fairy took it. The first couple of nights could be interesting though. :hug: I hope you find something that works.

DD was 3 when we got rid of hers, she kept losing them so I'd hide them as I found them. We just told her they were lost. The first couple of nights were pretty bad for her but she got used to it.

I don't know Dan, unless it's causing big problems for your DS, I'd be inclined to keep it :redface:. Does it matter if he's dependent on it? Whatever gets everyone the most sleep I reckon LOL! You've got some good suggestions for getting rid of DD's dummy though, you could give them a go (although I wouldn't be stressing out about it too much at this stage ;)).

Massive hugs hun :hug:

What my SIL did for her DD was she sat her down and said that she is now a big girl and if she wanted to do big girl things like wear princess dresses she would have to throw out her dummy. The first couple of nights were hard as she was so dependant on it but everytime she went to grab for it or she would whinge for it we would all say "big girls dont need dummys" her DD was so determined to be a big girl that after a few days she stopped asking for it. Though my SIL has failed with her DS he is 3 and still has a dummy but thats her, she cant stand his tantrums so she lets him keep it which i find very disgusting but then again thats why i dont talk to her :lol:

With your DS i agree go cold turkey with him, the first couple of nights will be hard but hes very young still and he will get over it. Good luck :)

Sorry I have no help for you, when DD1 turned three she had to give up her dummy's in order to get her special birthday present (an added extra) She took them to the rubbish bin and threw them all in. I didn't hear about them again.

DD2 is nearly 3, and I don't mind that she uses the dummy still. She now only has it for sleeps and I will do the same when she turns 3 if she needs too. What I mean is, I don't care if it is her comforter for going to sleep... why is that a problem? I really don't understand why people have issues with stopping children from having comfort when they go to bed?

My DD1 is about to have some invasive diagnostic tests for kidney issues.... if she at 5 wanted a dummy, I'd give it to her.... seriously... is it that important?

Sorry I have no help for you, when DD1 turned three she had to give up her dummy's in order to get her special birthday present (an added extra) She took them to the rubbish bin and threw them all in. I didn't hear about them again.

DD2 is nearly 3, and I don't mind that she uses the dummy still. She now only has it for sleeps and I will do the same when she turns 3 if she needs too. What I mean is, I don't care if it is her comforter for going to sleep... why is that a problem? I really don't understand why people have issues with stopping children from having comfort when they go to bed?

My DD1 is about to have some invasive diagnostic tests for kidney issues.... if she at 5 wanted a dummy, I'd give it to her.... seriously... is it that important?

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I don't know Dan, unless it's causing big problems for your DS, I'd be inclined to keep it :redface:.

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I so have to agree.....these people dont have to live in your house...dont see the stress its causing with having no sleep...who care's hon..our children are only babies for a short time and if it means they have a dummy and it makes them happy then so be it!

Lots of babies fall asleep on the boob...Mateauz did, it was the only way he would go to sleep and you know what....I didnt care, if it soothed him and made him happy then I was happy.

VY has just turned 3. Yes she has a dummy to go to sleep or when she is distressed and get's upset with out it so I make sure that I have one. Id rather her be happy then crying and horrible. She'll out grow it when she is ready.

:hug: you'll do whats right for you...happy baby makes for happy mummy

Dan- Funny isn't it, our sleep school said "If it sooths her to keeps using it, as she'll get rid of it when she's ready."
They told me not to get rid of it until she's ready as she's more then likely going to go for her thumb and that is always going to be there. Therefore much harder to get rid of ;)

Annabelle, just last night woke me up with "Mummy, where's dummy, I want it." So I found it, within her blankets and she went straight back to sleep ;)

Thanks for all the tips and advice ladies. I wouldn't care if DS had a dummy but the problem is he is waking every 20 minutes morning and night for me to put it back in and won't settle without it. I can't keep getting up to him every 20 minutes morning and night and still function. I'm completely exhausted.
I'm so lost. DS won't settle without a dummy but I have to go to him every 20 minutes to put it back it in. I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!

I have no help as how to get rid of it as my DS is 2.5 & we are yet to get rid of his. I am currently just not replacing them so they have no appeal left in them.....well that's what I'm hoping.

I didn't have much trouble with him waking for it, but just thought I'd offer some thoughts if you want to keep it. Have you tried different dummies? Our fist dummy with DS was Avent & as it was flat & silicon he would start sucking so fast it would just fly out. I found both nuk & happy baby good as the shape made them easier to keep in. Also (and this is just something I did, don't know if recommended or not....not looking to be crucified) but........we often went the next size up dummy with DS also, seemed to keep it in much better. Just a couple ideas if wanting to keep it.

I can't help with either case Dan. Sorry. But I wish I knew the answer because I feel I need to get rid of DD's dummy as well. We had 10 in this house at one point - she has systematically lost them and is down to 2. I refuse to buy more. She lost these two today and was asking me to help find them. I told her they are her dummies and she lost them so she has to find them or no dummy. She moved on to something else, came back to the dummy issue, moved on to something else, came back to dummy issue (this happened about 4 times with her looking when she was asking about dummies). Eventually, when she REALLY wanted them, she remembered where she had put them (in her creche bad :rolleyes:) and is happily sitting with one in her mouth as I type. What irks me with her though, is that she doesn't have one at creche at all! But as soon as we collect her from creche - she demands one!!!!!! And has it on or near her all day at home! :wall:

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Thanks for all the tips and advice ladies. I wouldn't care if DS had a dummy but the problem is he is waking every 20 minutes morning and night for me to put it back in and won't settle without it. I can't keep getting up to him every 20 minutes morning and night and still function. I'm completely exhausted.
I'm so lost. DS won't settle without a dummy but I have to go to him every 20 minutes to put it back it in. I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!

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Try it - u might be surprised at how he goes! we thought the same with Miss B when we were getting up every 30mins - but we have never looked back! and like pretty butterfly suggested those snuggle blanket toy thingys are great!

Actually

I remember in hospital the nurses wrapping Mateauz a certain way which kept the dummy in...if only I could blasted well remember now :lol:

DD2 was the same, I spent all night replacing it, drove me nuts.
At 4 months I'd had enough and went cold turkey, was better than I thought it'd be. Of course at first she would be looking for it and wasn't happy but I stayed with her and patted her, rocked her on her side, rubbed her back, til she settled. I also gave her little blanket as a comforter which she now always sticks in her mouth when going to sleep.
Getting rid of it was best thing for me, she stated sleeping longer because she was able to settle herself.
I think some babies the dummy works cause they use it just to settle but with our bubs they relied on it to sleep not just settle thats why they keep waking.
The way I thought of it was I was alreday not getting any sleep so what difference would it make if i was up settling her for a few nights.

can you wrap him so his arms are up near his mouth, he can then suck on his fists etc.. to self settle again :hug:

TBH - i would leave the 2yr old for the time being...plenty of time for that later. My nearly 2 yr old wants her dummy ALL day....i have this little voice in my head that says 'dont give it to her'...but i give in. Why ? Because i have a 3 month old to tend to and he needs me more ATM - there is plenty of time for me to wean my DD off the dummy...just right now isnt a good time. Thats what i tell myself anyway....(thats the other voice in my head !!! LOL......)

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can you wrap him so his arms are up near his mouth, he can then suck on his fists etc.. to self settle again

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....i tend to agree with this idea...

Also, do you b/f??? Im thinking you do. My 14 week old always, always goes to sleep on my boob...thats how i put him to sleep- day and night.

I would tend to go cold turkey too...dont they say after 3 nights of a new routine, it will then become habit ??? something like that.

Sounds like things are tough at the moment...hope you get some rest this evening....

I think you are all right with not worrying about DD's dummy at the moment. I've got so much on my plate at the moment why cause myself another problem for no reason. I don't know why I let everyone else's opinions affect me so much. DD can sleep with her dummy if she wants. I'll tackle that at a later date.
I need to concentrate on my stubborn (but incredibly cheeky and gorgeous) little man for the time being.

Dan, we had the same problem. We were getting up all night to DS to put the bloody thing back in.It also became a major issue in the car-so much so that I kept a stash on the front passenger seat so that i could jam them back in - while driving- i know- so dangerous, :redface: but I would have to pull over 20 times otherwise. We just went cold turkey.
And I did it in the morning so I could cuddle him to sleep for the day. TBH, it was really no problems, he cried for about 1/2 hr the first time and less after that. We had 1 2am-3am screaming incident, but that was all. And boy, am I glad we got rid of it, life is so much easier. Although Lil Man learned to suck his thumb instead...... but hey, so long as I dont have to wake up and put it back in who cares :lol::lol: