At what age did your baby/toddler/child first stay away for the night?

We haven't had a night away from DD yet, we have gone out for the evening but always been there in the morning, I don't even know if I am ready for DD to have a night away, I would miss her like crazy!!!

But MIL mentioned the other day that she is going to be old enough soon :doh:

In some ways it would be nice to be able to sleep in and not have to wake up when she does, but I also don't know if I trust people to do things how I do them, MIL has given her juice twice and I never give her juice - she is a massive water drinker and I don't want to disturb that ;) Even though it is a little thing I do wonder what else she might ben given.

But this isn't a rant or rave bout her as she is lovely :)

But I was really wondering at what age did you feel ok to leave your baby/toddler/child with grandparents of close friend for the night?

I think DS would have been at least two.
Id have been happy for him to stay at my parents earlier than that but they didnt want to be woken up at night.
He dd stay once before that, but they made me stay too.

I still havent!!!!!!!!! DS1 is 18 months old, even when I was in hospital having DS2 my mum was here to look after DS1 but DH was home every night to put him to bed etc.

I dont see myself letting him stay anywhere for a very long time (as even when I knew DH was at home with him I was still worried about him and my mum doing things same way I do and same rountine etc.)

For us as well it would mean staying 2 hours away with either set of grandparents :o

I think whenever YOU feel comfortable leaving them overnight is when it's the right time :) With DD1, it was very early on - we lived with my parents when she was born and so mum would often 'take' her overnight as I was struggling with depression, sleep deprivation, and just generally being overwhelmed with the adjustment to motherhood... I had no confidence in my parenting ability and figured mum did alright with me so I didn't have any worries, kwim? It's a different story now, DD2 only just had her first sleepover at nanna and poppy's the weekend before last because DH and I got a last-minute invite to go to the Gold Coast and I jumped at it because we've never had a trip as a couple, not even since before DD1 was born. It was a bit hard for me because we were 7 hours away and DD2 is definitely more of a mummy's girl than DD1 (who will go to anybody and be happy lol), but we both survived and I had a great time :)

Ds was 18 months (and feral, and i was pg and felt like cr*p). But that was with my mum, who i completley trust to follow my wishes and take good care of him. I wouldn't leave him overnight with my MIL.

ds was 4yrs and 3 months he stayed away for 3 nights(GPs live 400kms away)
DD hasnt yet

I have left DS with dp overnight a couple of nights (like 2) but that doesn't really count ;) we have my sisters wedding coming up and DS will be almost 23 mnths and MIL is staying at our house to watch DS overnight so we have no curfew but will probably be home in the hours of the morning... :dunno: if that counts.

TBH while your MIL may think your DD is old enough for a night away only you know if DD really is so I agree with others... don't rush if you don't want to and do it when you (and DH) are ready.

Thankyou for your feedback, it is interesting to read the different ages and the different reasons, and what is right for one person is very different to another, which was to be expected.

I know that we won't be doing it once the cooler weather hits, as part of DD right lung doesn't work and even a cold can send her to hospital in respiratory distress and when she does get sick it takes vigilant monitoring and I wouldn't want to put that kind of responsibility on someone else, and we know when to make the call. As she can still have a giggle or smile, yet be in quite a bit of trouble.

So it might not be until the end of the year at this rate as I don't think I will be ready before then :lol:

If anyone else wants to share I would be really interested in what has/hasn't worked for you, and dealing with "trusting" the carer to do what you want :D

:redface: Coz I am shocking :o DD1 was 4.....two nights before her 4th birthday actually, was her first sleep over. DD2 still has not...
ETA It was to my Mums, and I always said to her, she can go when SHE is ready and not before. (Mum and Dad have been waiting since her birth for her sleepover)

DD was 23 months old and I left her with my mum during the day and my brother stayed with her at nights. That was for a 3 day period when I went interstate. She was fine. My brother lived with me for a year when DD was 6 mths to 18 months old so she is very close to him and she is fine with my mum too. I havent allowed overnight stays with her father yet and she is nearly 3.5 yrs old.

well Jack is 3 yrs 4 mths and he wont be for a very long time to come, I have only left him for a few hrs about 1/2 dozen times with anyone except Jase ... my MIL and FIL were talkign about when they retire end of year they want a caravan big enough to take grandkids away, one is 4 in 2 weeks Jack is 3 yrs 4mths and luke is 3mths, they can take the 4yr old but no way in hell will they be takign my boys before they are 10 :lol:

Eleanor had her first sleep over at my mum's about 2 weeks ago - she was just on 10 months. She was perfect, slept all the night through. I only live just around the corner, so I'm happy I can come get her if she really needs me (Mum or Eleanor!). I'm planning on leaving her for the whole weekend soon - I'm more then comfortable with my mum and her ability to look after her.

Queen ... i'm not far behind you as our 3yrs+7mth old DD still has not slept overnight at anyone's home :shakehead: ... So Queen you give me hope, lol ;)

2yrs 3 months for DD1 and only because DD2 was being born, it was a disaster so only recently 3yrs 2 months we retried and wow i wish we'd tried again earlier!! she loves going to my mum and dads

Vic, I have left DD overnight with the Bear for 3 nights (two nights in November and one last week when I was in Melbourne for work), but I wouldn't leave her with someone else. I just don't think she would feel safe and comfortable and I'm pretty sure she would give them seven levels of hell if she woke up in the night (which she still does quite a lot :rolleyes:) and neither of us were there. I think its up to you, but it would have to be someone you trust 100%, someone DD knows really, really well and feels totally safe with. But with N's health issues I can definitely understand your caution. No rush ... and of course you need to be ready too!

I've left both kids early on.. around the 6 month mark. DS shared 10 days in between both sets of grandparents when Hubby and I went away on our honeymoon interstate. DD was 5 months old when we went to a wedding and both DS and DD stayed at my parents for the night. That was close to 48 hours away from us.
I'm veyr lucky that my kids are more than happy to hang out with any of their grandparents and are pretty relaxed with most family. They've only ever stayed at grandparents places though.

DS was 4 months when he stayed overnight at my Mums as we had a wedding and wouldn't be getting home till late so didn't want to disturb him in the middle of the night to take him home. I didn't really get any extra sleep as I was BF so my boobies woke me up still LOL.

DS is going to stay at Mums again overnight next weekend (only the second time for the WHOLE night), as DH and I have decided we need a night out - and again I'd rather he sleep there than us disturb him in the middle of the night. My Mum is awesome though, she has babysat him many many times and follows our routine to a T and respects our parenting ways and DS LOVES her to bits. She also doesn't mind if I ring a million times. I would never leave him with the ILs though, they would probably feed him very inappropriate food and I would be concerned for his safety, they seem to lack common sense (dont seem to respect routine etc) and have clearly forgotton what its like to look after a baby.

Last time Mum had him, I was SOOO Excited to see DS the next morning that it was like Christmas LOL - You'll know when you are ready Beema, dont let anyone pressure you to do it before you are ready as you will just worry and fret the whole time

i never had people to leave my kids with - family zillion miles away ...

DS1 was 5!!
DD hasnt spent a night apart from both of us she is nearing 5
DS2 - nope!!

lucky ducks to have that support xxx

DD1 was 18m as DP and I had the flu so badly we were incapable of looking after her. My mum drove 100km to pick her up and she stayed for 3 nights until we were better.

She has been to stay regularly since then - she loves going to stay with my mum. DD2 hasn't stayed away yet.

DS had just turned 2, and he only stayed away cos it was our wedding night. He stayed with my sister & BIL, who have a little boy just a few weeks older, and they're best pals (for 2yos), so I was very relaxed. And he had a ball, from all accounts.

I'm guessing he'll be having a night away sometime in April too, cos I don't think watching me in labour is going to be all that much fun for him.

DD was 1 year, 3.5 months. We had a wedding to go to that was 4 hours away and were gone two nights. When we got back, we walked up the stairs, she looked at us and went 'oh, it's you guys' and went back to playing with her bucket of water.

She was at my parents place - they are 2 hours away from us so when we see them we are staying at their place. We had already been there for a week before we went away and my mum had done the going to bed routine etc. DD managed just fine with it all.

Since then she has had plenty of overnighters with MIL (who is only 20 minutes away). We are planning on going away for 3-4 nights when she will be 2.5 - staying with my mum again.

DD was around the 7month mark - both DH and I were in a bridal party and thought it was time we had a night off so to speak! I still woke well before 7am though so no lie in for me! It was with my parents though, and she had slept there before with us, so I knew she was comfortable there. Plus, I knew that I could tell my parents exactly what to do and know that it would be done. She still hasn't stayed at the MIL's only because I don't feel comfortable with that yet.

You'll know when you're all ready for it - no point giving in too early -because you won't enjoy it as you'll be too worried about DD to relax.

Jensen was 2years 4mths ( and to be really specific - 8days)

DS is nearly 2.5 and I haven't left him overnight with anyone, even DH. I am sure that he would be fine with DH though, it is just that I have no reason to go out at night by myself lol. We haven't left him with anyone during the day either, except once when he went with the neighbour when I was feeding the baby and then I went over 20 minutes later.

If I had someone that I could trust and that DS was comfortable with then I would probably leave him, but as it stands we have no family nearby so he hardly sees them and no close friends here either.

We are having our first night away from DD next month. We are driving up to my sisters (2 hours away) and leaving her there as we are staying near her house (20 minutes away) that night. I am hoping that as DD will have 2 little cousins to play with she wont even notice we are gone. Of course I still feel nervous about it.....

The only oneof my children that has been away from us over night is the eldest and he was 6. He stayeed with j's parents for a night and that was a one off. He has since stayed at his friends and had school camp.

Its not that I dont trust anyone...I dont have the opportunity and have never been asked. Family live to far away or are to busy with their own lives to offer.

Having a special needs child also doesnt help because it might be more bother then its worth with him. I really dont mind....as I did have my children for me to enjoy :)