induced next monday, and about to be left alone by my husband

Hello, my name is Caroline, I'm 40 weeks pregnant in 2 days and booked in for induction next monday. I can't wait for this blessed moment! i need to get back to life, I'm so depressed right now and it's been like that almost the last 9 months... I'm French, with all my family in France, and I'm married to an Autralian man, since last April when I actually felt pregnant. He used to be the most loving person and for the last 9 months, no one has never been treated me that bad in my whole life.. I've been suffering from depression because of feeling so lonely and having no support at all from him. he basically left me alone all the time, ignoring and running away from all my pain. Now, he announced me two weeks ago ( 38 weeks pregnant) that he wanted to leave me, that he've been thinking about it for 3-4 month and that he wants his freedom back!.. I just can't beleive this is happening and I'm stuck here, got nowhere to go, got no money, and just have to handle staying with him, letting him making me feel like the biggest piece of ****, and I just can't stop crying.. and I'm so worried that all this is affecting my little princess coming out so soon. I just can't beleive he's doing that to us..i'm so hurt.. I try to keep up for my baby, but it's so hard.. don't even know why I'm writing all this now, I just don't know what to do...

You poor thing :hug: I feel for you. Whereabouts are you? Do you have anyone supporting you for your birth?

OH you poor darling that is such a sad situation to be in.

Where are you in Australia?

Oh whoa. :hug: Yeah whereabouts are you? xo

:hug: hun. This is such an awful situation.
DO you have any family coming over when you have your princess? Do you have anyone to support you at the birth?

I can't even begin to imagine how your feeling. And how unfair of your DH to leave you with this. ( I won't go on here as there is other things to be worrying about at the moment, like the birth of your LO)

:hug: If i was/am close I'd help you out. :hug:

Hello, I'm on the sunshine coast. He still wants to be here for the birth, I'm just not sure myself now that I want him there after what he did to me, or to us I shoul say. i've got one good friends but i just don't feel like annoying her with all my problems and I hate crying in front of people I love... I don't know.. i'm so lost right now, and scared and disappointed.. it's too much for me at the moment, I'm too weak. I'm usually pretty strong but now I just feel that i'm losing it.. I just want my little bubba to be here with me and love her with all my heart. I justy want her to be healthy and safe right now and then I 'm just hoping that I'm gonna be able to handle all this and be strong enough for her.

:hug: What a difficult situation.

i was under a lot of stress when i was heavily pregnant and my baby was just fine. :hug: Your baby will be ok.

Can you get any support? you poor thing.

Big :hug: for you. I can totally understand your situation, when I was having DS2, my partner at the time, had left me, I was induced at 37 weeks, and had him all by myself, not one person could be with me. It was awful. I only had the midwives with me, and thank goodness for that! His father came to visit after he was born, but didn't stay long because he was hung over from the night before.

Can your friend help you thru your birth instead of your husband? Because it is totally your decision if you want him there or not. They won't allow him in if thats what you want.

I am in Brisbane, if you need to chat, i'll listen :D

Thanks everyone for your concern. it made me feel better to write it all down. i'm looking for some help i can get around the sunshine coast like groups or associations. 4 more anyway and i'll be with my little princess!! this is all i need to focus on now. I haven't told the situation to my family, it's too hard, and I don't want to make them worry. we're so far from each other, they would feel too bad not being able to be there with me and I love them so much, i just want to spare them the pain.. I'll go through it. thanks a lot to all of you xxxxxxxxxx

Oh my goodness! How painful for you, how scary for you! There's really no advice I can offer you, you need to work this out in your own way, and you will.

Lots and lots of love to you.

i am so sorry hun. I hope things work out for you. Please talk to your friends she wont mind!!

Have you thought about a student doula? They can provide birth support, free... or you could hire an experienced doula. They will be with you before, during and after the birth and provide emotional and physical support for you... I can give you some names?

Thanks belly belly, i don't really know what a doula is but i'm already googling it and gonna have a look at it. yes, i'd appreciate a lot if you've got some good numbers, it could be useful. thanks a lot Caro

Ok leave me to it, I will put the word out to my contacts... I will post some details soon.

Great news :) I have been able to get in touch with Vicki Chan, a midwife, who is incredibly amazing - she is an independent midwife who works in hospital births and homebirths and is an absolute inspiration - if I was in QLD I would want Vicki at my birth :) She has a French friend too! She asked me to pass on this:

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Send her my number. Between me and my French couch-surfer who just attended a beautiful homebirth with me on the weekend, I'm sure we can offer some support.I'm at Buderim on 0402140769

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You have come to the right place Caroline.

This beautiful group of men and women in here will be a great support all the way and for as long as you need us.

The Doula BellyBelly has for you sounds wonderful....it may be the best way for you at this time as your DH is not sounding too reliable.

:hug::hug::hug:

You are going to be a fantastic mummy...you already love your little baby with all your heart, you wouldn't be here asking for the best possible outcome for you little treasure if you didn't.

Take care Caroline

:HUG:

I am so sorry for the experience you are having!

Congratulations on your pregnancy and expecting a little princess!

I am a doula and supported a hospital birth where Vicki was the midwife, she is wonderful and amazing and very very respected in the field!! I so so so so so so strongly recommend you get in contact with her! I wish you the most wonderful wonderful labour and birth and early days with your daughter who you will obviously love more than anything! xo

Once she comes nothing else in the world will matter and you will feel better with her in your arms. Im sorry he is being so horrible and you are feel alone. Im glad you found this site and im sure you will have all the support you need in the future.
Best of Luck with your induction. When she is here.... You wont ever need anyone else anyway

I have no words, you poor thing. All the above advice is great, the Doula sounds wonderful, I just wanted to post so you knew how many people are thinking of you and sending good energy.

So soon you will have an angel in your arms and everything else will fall away. You are going to be a magnificent Mother and that baby is so lucky to be born into your love.

Just keep putting one foot in front of the other x

I second that. Vicki Chan is a wonderful woman... Where abouts on the Sunshine Coast are you my love?

all I can say is that he sounds like an absolute piece of %^&$. I hope you get the opportunity for an awesome doula and dont be afraid to ask your friends for help because im sure that they would want to be there. Is there any chance you might get to go back home for a little while so you cna be with your family?
I'm in newcastle but I have rellies in Montville... I think sunshine coast is a beautiful place especially if u have kids as there is so much to do.
Best of luck with the birth of your beautiful bub... you have a long journey ahead of you and I'm sure it will be tiresome but lots of fun at the same time (with the bub) and well worth it.

Caroline - just wondering how you are doing? Probably offline because you now have, or are very close to having your bubba. I hope that all is going well for you (as well as it can be given your situation), and I hope that you can come back to let us know how the birth went when you are ready. Know that there is a lot of support here if and when you need it :hug:

I couldnt read this and not post, i feel so sorry for the way your husband has treated you, and left you feeling so alone and upset!!!
Where do you live? Im on the sunshine coast too. I know how hard it is being so far from your family, mine all live in the UK.
Im sure its hard to reach out to people you dont know and it sounds like you feel you would just be a trouble to those who love you, you need support from the people around you. Thats what friendships are all about, im sure your friend would be sad to think that she wasnt there for you when you needed her!
Huge hugs to you. xxx