My kids just won't eat the meals I cook!

I didn't know if I should put this in the food area, or here, but I'm thinking it's more of a behavioural issue than a food issue. But move it if needs be!!

As the title says, my kids just won't eat the meals I cook. I ensure they are healthy so yes there are lots of veggies, usually meat and pasta or rice, nothing terribly fancy or spicy. I tend to use similar ingredients regularly, so its nothing unusual for them. But most nights DS just doens't even try it. He will just upturn his bowl and throw it everywhere. He will not eat much meat or veggies. DD is slightly better and will sometimes try the food, but regularly won't eat a meal. I don't serve alot for them. The only meals I can guarentee they will eat is spaghetti, home made fish fingers and chips and ham and bean soup. Occaisionally they eat sausages. DD will eat lamb chops or cutlets and homemade chicken nuggets (as will DS sometimes).

Tonight I made chicken with pasta and veggies all mixed up with a cheesy sauce. They barely touched it. I manages to convince DD to try some chicken and a few bits of pasta but that's it. As usual DS just threw it everywhere. I sit and eat with them and take about the food being yummy and what it is etc. We don't sit for ages to eat, usually about 20-30mins. If they don't eat I don't make a big deal. They will get fruit is they ask for it, but I won't offer it. DS is still BF so I'm not terribly worried about him he has a big feed to sleep and 1 overnight and one in the morning and maybe 1 through the day. They often help me cook. I feel like I have tried everything and nothing is working.

What can I do? are your 3 and (almost) 2 yr olds the same? Do I just ride it out and be confident they are ok because they are healthy, and just persevere and eventually they will learn to eat it? I'm just getting so frustrated making these time consuming meals for them to turn their noses up at it.

i have no advice for you but thought i would let you know that sometimes i feel your pain!!!
I have been told that no healthy child will starve themself, as long as you continue to offer them healthy balanced meals they will be right ( soooooo much easier said than done!! lol)
Good luck!

My 2 are extremely fussy as well. A favourite for them is a pasta dish with the following sauce. Chop 1-2 apples, onion, 2 x carrots, some sweet potato, some garlic and add a big spoonful of tomato paste and about half to 1 cup of chicken stock. Cook down untill everything is mushy and then add some zuchini, cook for another few minutes. Blend and cook some pasta - my 2 love gnocchi (the fresh stiff in the deli at the supermarket). Cook the pasta and then add some sauce, mix it all up sprinkle with some grated cheese and that's it.

It's a winner! And full of vegies too.

My DS1 who is now 6 went off my cooking around the 3 year old mark, he will eat spag bol till it comes out of his ears but he pretty much eats everything we eat now and if he doesnt he will at least try the food. Before he would only eat fish fingers, chicken nuggets and spag bol, that was his diet and no matter what I did, I never won the battle with him. DS1 eats different food now like paw paw salad, laska soup and the hotter the better, he loves chilli, he will also eat a salad sandwich with the lot, onion, tomato and all. DS1 will only eat apples and grapes though wont eat any other fruit. I am currently dealing with my DS2 who will only eat fruit and yoghurt for dinner he is 3 1/2 I figure DS1 came around so I'm hoping DS2 will aswell. Good Luck.

Do they have any snacks in the afternoon? We and try limiting any snacks after 4pm.. and drinks except water

My kids love to eat the veges raw as I am chopping them up for dinner.

I can't really offer any other advice as I don't have any food issues in this house..

Spag bol with grated zucinni and carrot is a great way to hide veges..

Also have you tried them on salads?

Not sure if I can be of any help because Brendan (3) has never been a big eater. He will eat just about everything just not a lot of it.

My DD who is 18 months is the same. She will eat Spag Bog, most pasta meals I make, anything with mince and nuggets. She doesn't eat anything else I cook. I always offer what we are having.

mmm.... it can be so hard sometimes, can't it?

My DS1 eats his veg - but not if it is paired with 'yummier' food like pasta and chicken. I have to feed him the veges on their own first, then when he is finished that, he gets the pasta, and then the 'yummiest' - the meat. Its such a pain when I just want to dish it all up and eat.
I would maybe try vegies or nothing for a while (at dinner, that is). Maybe some grated cheese on top or a natural herb seasoning to make it a bit tastier. They are unable to grasp the concept of vegies being the healthiest food for them, so i think when they are grouped with pasta and meat they just think, "why would you offer me this not so tasty stuff when there is this better tasting stuff? Just give me more of the better tasting stuff!"
I would also replace fruit snacks with vege snacks ie - carrot sticks, celery, cauliflower, etc. Fruit is full of goodness but also very sugary, so it can bring their taste bar up quite high - and subsequently everything that falls beneath this level of tastiness becomes bland and boring.

Just a suggestion! Sometimes kids are a science that no philosophy seems to work for!!

XX

Thanks everyone, seems like it might be fairly normal then!

We don't give them snacks after about 3.30/4.00 because we eat early, at about 5.30ish. Then it's the bath, books and bed routine. Between 6.30 and 7.30 they are in bed and asleep. They do eat all day, particularly DD who is a mega grazer. I guess in the grand scheme she is eating well. It's just that she won't eat veggies, the only veggies she will eat is raw carrot, occaisionally lettuce and potato. I make potato and pumpkin or sweet potato mash and she will eat that. I sneak grated veggies into everything I can, like grated carrots, zuccihni, mushies, pumpkin, onions...anything I can grate really!! Salads are very unpopular inour house, lol! Except if it's my potato salads with tuna, which DD will eat (also has grated carrot and corn niblets in it). I make sure I put in bits they can see too though so that they can get to know what tastes like what. I hate that I'm making a nice meal every night and having to throw half of it out because they just don't eat. I feel so 'Why bother' most nights. Especially when DH is on arvo/night shift, which is half of the time he's working. And especially if it's something I know they just won't even try, like a baked dinner.

Kris, thanks for that recipe I will have to give it a try!

Mmm i dont know any kids that like lettuce (i.e salads), so i wouldnt worry about that.

Great idea with the grated veges...zucchini slice is my secret for that. They just think the 'pie' has egg in it...little do they know its full of carrot, zucchini, and potato...LOL...

TBH....i wouldnt get too hung up about them not eating an array of veges...my DD#1 only eats corn and carrot....and sometimes snow peas. Thats it. So if we're having them, i serve them. If not, she just has a plate of pasta for dinner. Im like you, my DH does night shift, and im not cooking 4 different meals at night. So if we're having spag bol...she just has pasta. If we're having stir fry...she just has rice. I got over the 'OMG your not having 5 veges a day' thing. She eats fruit, she drinks water, she's generally a a healthy girl....youve got a lot of years up your sleeve to try out the veges...if i were you...i would stick with what they like......introduce other things slowly....like really slowly.
GL!!!!

Lilias, I agree with mbear. but would go a bit further and a few nights a week forget about figuring our what the kids might like and just make stuff that you and DH like and work around that for them. It will be less frustrating for you and you might be surprised at what they will try.
We have never made different meals to us, for our DD. she is not great with veges but we persist and she is getting better.

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Lilias, I agree with mbear. but would go a bit further and a few nights a week forget about figuring our what the kids might like and just make stuff that you and DH like and work around that for them. It will be less frustrating for you and you might be surprised at what they will try.
We have never made different meals to us, for our DD. she is not great with veges but we persist and she is getting better.

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I do regularly cook meals just for DH and I when I get bored of the basic meals. I made some yummy lamb shanks the other night in the slow cooker. Naturally the kids had nothing to do with it! DH isn't fussed with what he gets to eat though, so he's pretty easy to please! I usually cook meals I feel like when DH isn't home unless DD asks for something which she is occaisionally starting to do.
I don't cook meals especially for the kids either. They get what I cook. I do try to make at least one thing each night they will eat, like we had sausages pumpkin/potato mash and corn on the cob yesterday (sausages and mash at DD's request!). DD ended up only eating the snags, mind you she had 2! DS ate a small cob of fresh corn and 2 bits of sausage. That was it though. But better than usual! Tonight I thought they'd at least eat the pasta, but no luck :(
Tonight I caved and gave DD some apple and carrot before bed becasue she was crying she was hungry. I tried to convince her to eat her dinner but she was adamant she didn't like it. I try not to make it a regular thing to give them more food every night, but DD went to preschool today and she's often more hungry after that. And when she ate her apple and carrot peices, she told me 'Mmm, mmm, mummy, deeeelicious, all in my tummy!! Now my tummy is happy!' so I think she was pretty geniuine in saying she was hungry! :lol:

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Mmm i dont know any kids that like lettuce (i.e salads), so i wouldnt worry about that.
GL!!!!

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haha well my 3 yr old DD LOVES salad! Before her birthday I asked her what sort of cake she wanted and she said that she didn't want cake. I said "But what will we put your candles on?" Her reply - "A salad!" :rofl:

both my girls are fairly good eaters, but they don't eat everything, so I just work with what they like. One thing they both love is sushi - great for lunch - and full of veg!

Ahh it's a pain hey! I was going to suggest limiting snacks and eating early, but 5:30 isn't that late really!

Some of my other tricks are to eat the dinner meal at lunch time, or (probably a bad habit in the long run) to sit them in front of a movie/tv while eating (I set up little ikea stools as tables and have little chairs) - then they're not focussed on the food and it gets eaten while they're entranced. That's usually a trick for if they haven't eaten much all day.

But yeah really, mine tend to eat the most at breakfast, moderately at lunch, and then seem least hungry at dinner time. Crazy kids!

I think everyone has pretty much covered everything.

Just wanted to say, have you thought of keeping a food diary? I think you might be quite surprised as to how much healthy stuff your kids actually eat.

You did mention they like sweet potato mash, carrots, lettuce potatoes, cutlets, chops, spag bog etc.. well IMO i think this is pretty good for kids their age :) and you do grate veggies into most things so i really don't think you have anything to worry about, sounds like they are a couple of healthy normal children :)

Just keep cooking meals you and dh like and the kids will eventually begin to learn to taste new things. The worse thing you can do is stress about it and make a big deal over them not trying things, cause this will prob make them less inclined to try things etc.

Your doing a great job :)

Have you tried giving them 'dipping sauces' for their veggies etc. My 2 love having gravy in a small bowl and they dip in their veggies and eat them like that. I found them much more willing to eat when there was some kind of sauce available, gravy, mayo, tom sauce etc.

I am pretty lucky in what my kids eat, but we go through days when they won't touch their dinner, and I havve just learnt to let it go. We found really cutting back the afternoon snacks makes a difference, they usually have a snack when they have finished resting about 2:30ish, and then generally they dont eat again till dinner time- this has made a huge difference in what they eat at dinner time.

The other thing you could try is not giving them fruit after dinner but to put what they dont eat back in the fridge & if they ask for something after dinner reheat that for them.

Kids eh?! lol

My DS#1 is 3 years old and eats a great breakfast, normal morning tea, good lunch, good arvo tea and small or no dinner.

My DS#2 - who will be 2 in April.......small breaky, normal morning tea, reasonable lunch, good arvo tea - massive dinner!

I used to carry on like a nazi with DS#1 but he is healthy, lively and in a good weight range.

Hope that helps.
xxxx

I too feel your pain. DD is very very fussy and Drs say she is normal and will eat it eventually if she is hungry enough but IMO she is not normal and has become very sick from not eating, low iron and almost anaemic, so we had to find things she would eat and try to make it healthy, for example, she will eat lasagne so I puree vegetables and put them in, grating wont do coz she will see them and pick them out, spaghetti bolognese is also a hit with her and I use the same sauce as lasagne so I do the exact same thing and puree the veg.

So she will eat, nuggets, chips, lamb chops, lasagne, spaghetti bolognese, bread, cheese, vegemite, steak, a little mashed potato, plain white rice, 2 minute noodles, she will eat vegetable soup but I have to strain it because she wont eat the chunks.

So our meal revolve around what she will eat.

What I will suggest to have something he will like one night then some you and the rest of the family like the next that way you know he will be eating a good dinner every second day and hopefully he will start to try the things you eat on the other days.

If he will eat mashed potato you can puree cauliflour or zucchini (skin removed) or any white veg and put it in, bolognese sause I will use whatever veg I have (even just frozen mixed veg if I dont have any fresh) and puree it and put it in. The soup is obviously good even if it is strained as the goodness from the vege's are in the liquid.

She will eat a nice big bowl of Sustain cereal for breakfast which is good and has nuts and dried fruit etc so I figure she gets a little goodness from that coz she wont eat any fruit or veg whatsoever.

DS for me is ok, he will try stuff and I believe he is a normal fussy toddler who will eventually eat something if he is hungry.

I always put the salad and vegies in the middle of the table so if they ever want any they can help themselves. I find that if I ask them they will say no and sometimes crack up so its best to just have it there and let them decide when they want it.

Im hoping eventually it will get better.

So anyway, not sure if this has helped or not but hopefully maybe a little.

I know how you feel, Kel, only I think Natty is worse by the sounds. I can't get her to eat any veges at all and she doesn't even eat sauces so I can't puree veges for her. She does graze during the day too, and lately I have really been trying to only offer her natural, healthy stuff rather than convenient stuff (which she used to have every day). This hasn't improved her dinner habits though. I'm convinced the problem is behavioural also, and that one day she will eat.
I'm sure this is the issue because lately she has been saying, 'I don't WANT dinner' even though I know she's hungry. I have been trying to just say, 'fine. If you don't want it, don't eat it.' and I don't offer her anything else.
I too keep Natty's dinner for her and if she comes to me and tells me she is hungry later then I will just offer her dinner again. (Mind you, I would be happy if she ate carrot and apple as a post-dinner snack. Our issue here is that she wants yoghurt and I refuse to give it to her because it is too much like dessert, KWIM?)
It is stressful though. I wonder why I bother sometimes too, and the wastage is horrible.

Thanks again everyone.

I know that my kids eat fairly well compared to other people's and neither of them are undernourished! I think it's more that they are just fussy. They do eat a variety of foods, but one day I will make something and the next time I make it they just won't eat it! I don't mind if they genuinely don't like something. I don't like certain things either and I choose not to eat it, so if they don't like it, it's ok, but I want them to try it! And if they ate it last week then they like it and don't eat it this week, just because! It's upsetting too that I spend so much time thinking about and preparing healthy food for them and then they don't eat it, but will eat crap like store brought chicken nuggets, pizzas or hot chips, chocolate or lollies in a heart beat.

I am trying to make meals from scratch. Most days I do. We have one take out a week. I sometimes use a jar or packet sauce for dinner. I keep DD's meal for later if she tells me she's hungry. Sometimes she eats a bit more, somedays she tells me she doesn't want it. If she asks again then I will get her fruit (but not 'special' fruit like cherries of mangoes, it's boring old apples, carrot or pear!) No yoghurt or anything else. I was making a sandwich for DD for a while but it got to the point that she refused to eat dinner and was asking for a sandwich. I don't make a big deal about it if they don't I just remove it and put it away, or in the bin. I always put a little bit of everything on their plates, even if I know they don't like it. Maybe one day they will try it!