What age did u let ur DD shave their legs and dye their hair?

So my beautiful lil dancer will be 9 in june, and she is growing up so fast.!

atm we are in discussions over her shaving her legs, i originally said 15, then droped it to 12, but she does have quite dark hair on her legs and its very noticeable.
She is also a dancer and although they do wear shimmers for most routines, for cheerleading stunts shimmers are not allowed.

We have thought about various hair removal products and have decided the veet cream that has the plastic leg shaver, just to get started, before we move on to a real razer.

We are also talking about having blonde foils put in her hair to give it some definition as its a real boring brown, and as a dancer, she needs to stand out a lil bit, however she is only 9 and i think its a bit young.

so im after some input from others on what age they let their dd shave their legs and dye their hair?

tia

Would you consider getting her legs waxed instead of shaving? Would last sooooo much longer and not to mention the others benefits of waxing over shaving.

I wish my mum had taken me to have my legs waxed right from the beginning, rather than shaving. I think i was 11.

yes i did think about waxing, i only wax and epilady my legs, but i wondered if 9 was too young to feel the pain of the wax ripp!

She is very self aware, and has asked for over a yr now to have the hair removed, she is growing up so fast.

Her hair would be a lot finer hun and she wouldn't feel it as much as we do. Just make sure you take her to someone who is very good at what they do. They can start in an inconspicuous area and if she cant handle it, they can stop.

GL! :)

I told my DD who is 7months older then your DD she can wax her legs as soon as she is ready. As I don't want to run her of to the beautician every 6weeks Ill do it myself (I've done my own for years) and it will be so much cheaper this way. I wish my mother made us wax not shave. I figure when she is ready she will want the hair of so much she wont care about a little discomfort. At the moment she is happy with her hairy legs but it is blond and fine. When I do mine she occassionals says can I do one strip for her which I do and it doesn't really bother her although she doesn't come back for more lol well not until the next 6weeks when I am doing them again.

Foils sound nice. The school my daughter goes to doesn't allow anythinkg like that so it wouldn't be an option for my DD until she was in high school. If your happy and she wants them I don't see why to wait.

I haven't gotten this far yet, DD is only 5.

But I have to say, I think 9 seems really young for this sort of stuff?? I understand you are concerned that she is becoming self conscious and that must be hard.

I definitely will not be letting DD dye/colour her hair at 9. No way. There is plenty of time for that later on. I think little girls grow up waaaaay too fast these days and the things I have control over, like dying her hair, I will be delaying as long as possible. JMHO ;)

I think I was about 12 when I started shaving my legs. I wish I'd waited in hindsight and will be encouraging DD to do the same.

I dont have a daughter yet (der)

But Id let her wax her legs or shave them

but definately not dye the hair. Its something she will never get back to the normal colour, Id hate her to regret it :/ or you

Boy shes growing up so fast isnt she :/

Thanks for all the replies :)

I might hold off on the hair foils a lil longer, as the hairy leg issue is a bit more important to her right now.

Hmm, interesting that most of the replies say to wax? Maybe i should look at doing that instead, my sister is a beauty theapist, so i know she will feel a lil bit more comfortable, but im in my 30s and waxing still hurts me, i guess i might have to sit back down with her and ask if she wants to try it?

My friends DD just started shaving her legs at 9. The friend didn't know & if she had she wouldn't have let her just yet, but she's decided at her DD's age, she needs to pick her battles & this is one she'll leave alone.
Her DD did have quite dark hairy legs & she was getting self conciouse about them, as well as having other girls mention it.

I, personally won't be letting DD1 til she's older. High school probably. She'll be 11 then. Same age I was. She is blonde though. DD2 might be different, as she's darker.
The hair thing I think I'd wait. Mum permed my hair at 12, it was dyed the first time when I was 16. I let them put hair spray etc in, & might let them rinse in high school, but I don't think I'd let them dye til they are about 16 either.

But mine aren't there yet, so you never know.

9 is definitely too young IMO. There is a girl amongst DD's peers who does this and she has had her hair dyed unfortunately it hasn't been well received by the children, parents or teachers. I personally think it's way too young, and DD won't be doing any of that till she's left primary school at least IMO. If the hair is embarressing I can understand but dying hair is completely unnecessary. They are only children for such a short time.

I was 13 before we were allowed to get out ear pierced or shave our legs, and weren't allowed to gye our hair until we were 15 and even then, it had tp be done properly at the hairdressers and mum had to approve.

9 IMO is too young to dye one's hair.
With the legs, I would wax them if they were very dark and causing her greif. You could perhaps look at a silky mit - it may work for fine hair. I would be hesitant about using chemicals like Veet on her skin though.
I had very dark hair on my legs by the time i was 11 and it wasn't fun, I think my mum gave in and let me shave at 12. In the long run though, it didn't hurt me - hair is there, it is natural, it is human and she will live ;)
But Charlotte won't be dyeing hair, shaving legs or piercing ears until she is 12

I'm a beauty Therapist, my DD is 8. I've told her she can remove hair from her legs when she is old enough to handle the pain of waxing. To give her a slight idea, once when i was waxing my eye brows i put a tiny blob of hard wax on her leg the size of a pin head and told her to rip it off. It took one hair out and she carried on like a pork chop. Being that she is quite the little sook when it comes to pain, she wont be waxing legs for a long time. She's never seen me shave legs and probably wouldn't know its an option!

As for the hair thing, I won't even make a desicion like that until she's a teen, and when she is, then i'll make a desicion. I'd think around 14/15 would be the earliest.

Being that I am a beauty therapst and she sees waxing, tinting lash perming etc all the time, I'm very aware about her thinking she can be some beauty teen princess having all thses things done at some crazy early age. If anything, i'll make her wait even longer just to make a point!

I think 9 is WAY too young to even consider the hair thing...that do they have to look forward to when they are in their teens? Plus, I know a girl who had hair extentions at 10 (Seriouslly) and I was just mortified.

wow... 9 years old... for me it would be a NO WAY kind of thing....
i did what i wanted to my hair around 13 or 14..... can't remember about shaving though... but certainly not 9.... i suppose for me it was around 12, when puberty started (what a fun time!!) - so yeah, for my daughter i would assume the same.... i would be pretty sad if she was aware of body hair etc at age 9, but i have noticed she does have quite a fine hairy line down her back (i am very hair-less) so maybe this sort of thing will bother her earlier....

i don't think i'd let her dye her hair until she could come up with some money to fund the continual trips to the hairdresser.... but age 9 - i am gob smacked.... i've started her at ballet dancing for 3-4 year olds but i am now having a semi heart attack over what this might lead to in 5 years time!!

Is she upset by her hairy legs? If it is upsetting her then yes i would do it. I didn't get to do mine til I was 13 and had been upset by it for awhile before that as I was unfortunate enough to get quite dark hairs early.

As for the foils I would wait. 9 is quite young for that.

I also think it seems really young. Having said that I don't have very dark hair on my legs and I can see how that might get picked on by other girls. Having said that I would want to encourage my DD (thankfully I don't have one he he) to choose better friends than that - easier said than done I bet! Agree on foils and hair damage and wouldn't go there

thanks again for all the replies :)

yes shellbell, she is very upset by the hair on her legs, it is very dark and very hairy, 2 yrs ago, a not so nice girl made a comment that the hairs on her arms were too dark, so my dd attempted to shave them with a razer, it resulted in her cutting her arm a lil bit.
We have had many a night asking to remove the hair, hence why i droped the age from 15 to 12, and now am considering 9!

My hubbys estranged father is hungarian, so i think thats where the dark hair comes from?

i will definatly leave the hair foils till she is much older.

edit- hubby just said no to foils as well, lol,

I would do it then if its upsetting her then, I remember well the teasing from school. I know its young but I'd prefer to do it if she is unhappy by it.

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Would you consider getting her legs waxed instead of shaving? Would last sooooo much longer and not to mention the others benefits of waxing over shaving.

I wish my mum had taken me to have my legs waxed right from the beginning, rather than shaving. I think i was 11.

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likewise! I've noticed a huuuuuuuge difference in growth rate and density on areas waxed VS area shaved. My legs have gone really feral since pregnancy because i didn't want the wax ouch factor and shaved. i regret it big time

All three of my girls have started shaving their legs at 11 1/2 and were able to experience having a few foils put in. I believe in choosing battles and shaving legs is definately not one of them.

Jo

DD1 (although only 4) is also very dark and hairy so this is something that I do think will be an issue for us going forward as well. I shaved my own legs when I was about 11 and regret it so I would definitely be talking to her earlier on and discussing waxing etc to remove the hair if it is upsetting her.

The hair would be a different issue though and I do think 9 is too young. I was allowed to dye my own hair when I could pay for it - so at 14 when I got an after school job, I took myself off to the hairdresser :D

Hello there beautiful Anila, as you know I don't have a daughter but I think the veet cream with the rubber razor is a good comprimise to start her off with getting rid of leg hair. I can't remember when I started shaving my legs (maybe around 12?) but I do remember a girl who was Yugoslavian and her legs had very dark hair on them a few years before that. I don't 'think it's a problem to start her out at 9 years old if they are dark and she is having a problem with them... Waxing on the other had is still too painful for me :redface: The only thing getting waxed on my body is my eyebrows the rest is shaved, personally I hate the idea of having to wait till my leg hair grew back long enough to wax so I just shaved heaps, it doesn't take long and I'm happy with that method. As for the hair dye, I agree with many of the others, 9 is waaaaay to young, if I have a girl she can put a rinse in her hair when she's in high school and nothing permanent until she leaves school and pays for it herself ;)

It's always difficult Anila & I think it's wonderful that you are seeking out some help to form your opinion... :hug:

Personally 9 to dye her hair is absolutely a no go zone! I believe that we shorten childhood too much now days... She has the rest of her life to dye her hair & let her look forward to doing that.

I also think 9 is too young to shave/wax. However, I am blonde with hardly any hair so I cannot know how it would feel for her. I would try & stretch it out a little longer. I also would perhaps try a different tack? That we humans grow hair & it's normal to have some - that when you reach puberty it can get thicker & then as a young Woman she can decide if she feels comfortable with her hair or not. Then there are methods of removal - waxing is by far superior to shaving... (I have never shaved always waxed)...

It's difficult if she is conscious of how much hair she has but perhaps trying to help her see that we are all different & she is beautiful with or without hair? Good luck :hug:

my mum made me wait until I was in high school (13), I had thick blond hair. Very self conscious about it. She took me to a beauty salon one evening (it was dusk - lol I remember!) and got them waxed. Only the bottom half though. I think she wanted me to have them waxed everytime. She was very disappointed when I found her razor and dug a great big hole in my shin.

No idea when my sister started....

Just a thought, could you try bleaching the hair on her arms and legs? I've used those bleaches before and they're pretty gentle... Might be a good interim alternative for a little while... GL

i was 13 before i shaved my legs, and even then, i did it behind mums back, naturally she found out and i got into a lot of trouble for it. Then she hid all the razors for awhile then evenutally she brought me some but wasnt very happy about it.
I wasnt aloud to dye my hair. period. I left home when i was 16.. one of the first things i did was dye my hair jet black :shakehead:

I think her shaving her legs at 9 might be alittle younge but you said she's a dancer and i can undertsand that. I think when DD is in high school then ill let her shave her legs :) but if she really really wants to eralier (depending on how much earlier) then ill probably let her, i know what its like to be held back over something so stupid.
as far as dying her hair i think 9 is too younge. Again i think ill make her wait til high school, ill probably try to put it off for as long as i can.. its so bad for your hair :(

Thankyou all again for replying

I spoke to my mum last night she was shocked that this was even in discussion at our place and told my dd that she thought she should wait and gave her all the reasons like growing back darker etc..
She was concerened that a cream is chemical based and she is too young for that

What we didn't tell my mum was the emotional reasons behind wanting to do it

we have two months till she turns 9 so I guess we still have time to make the right desision

as for foils in her hair hubby has said no not for a long time he also told her she is not alowed to date till she is 40 lol

I really appreciate the repiles it's good to have an idea of what other mothers have done or will do !

My DD1 dyed her hair & removed the hair on her legs for the first time in the days leading up to her year 6 farewell, so she was 12. It was almost a rite of passage for her; she was leaving the primary school girl behind. She didn't do a permanent hair dye however, just a semi permanent that has now faded.

9 does sound young , i think i was 10 or 11

I recently tipped Dudies hair, seems puberty has started early for him and he's quit mature in many ways ect. He turns 10 in July and is getting very concious of how he looks ect. I really dont mind.....its only hair and it will grow out.
Dee I love, love LOVE how you have made a 'deal' with your DD in regards to getting her legs waxed. I think that is awesome.

I wasnt allowed to dye, pierce, wax me legs...let alone breath half the time. It pushed me away with the control issues in my house and put a bigger wedge in my relationship at the time with my parents and I left home at 15 with a bad taste in my mouth. I dont want my own children doing the same. I think we need to listen and trust our children sometime with what they would like to look like and let them express themselves and allow them to develope into the person that they have stashed inside, even if we dont like it.

Anila...your a wonderful mum for doing the 'research' and trying to do the best. :clap: well done hon

My DD has just turned 9, and I wouldn't let her dye her hair or shave/wax her legs yet. We'll be waiting until she leaves primary school for the legs, and I hope to convince her to wait until she's left high school for the hair dye, if possible.

I think it would be a shame to "normalise" waxing/shaving so young - if one child did it, others would probably want to follow suit at that age. Perhaps we (as in the societal we) should work harder at letting kids be kids, no matter what they look like.

But that's just my opinion :)

I would start her on waxing.. as when she is 25 she will have much softer hair and there is a chance of less..
Coloring her hair. i was 16 before i was allowed to.. and it was ok , I was a figure skating dancer.

I did have to wait till i was 11 to pierce my ears.. and I will do the same with my DD.

Good luck.. whatever you choose will be fine!

If some of this pressure that she is feeling has come from the cheerleading side of things, maybe you could get together with a few other Mums and see how they feel about it? I'm not sure I like the idea that the cheerleading is putting that pressure on them at such a young age, because they are meant to have hairy legs at 9 kwim? However, I had really dark leg hair so I'm sympathetic to how she is feeling about it :( I even shaved my arms too at one stage because I hated it that much and it wasn't even that bad in reality! It was just how I perceived it. maybe you could try some natural bleaches like lemon juice and sunlight to help lighten the hair on her legs? I was 11, nearly 12 when I started shaving them so the longer you can get her to hold off the better. That said though, the woman who waxed my legs had a client who had just started taking her 8yo for waxing because she had dark hair too and she said that there is a much better result when you start that young, but I think that it is far too young IMO. It's a tough one though :hug:

As for the hair, well that is easier. If you feel that she just needs that extra 'zing' for her performances, could you get some of those clip in hair extensions and you wouldn't even know the difference if you get the really good quality ones.