Our baby is gone :(

In July we were excited to learn we were expecting our second child after trying for about 6 months

Things progressed smoothly, we moved house (at 5 weeks preg) , I found a new GP to see and we were making plans for our new future....

On saturday 4th September 2010 (at 11 weeks pregnant) I went to the ER because when I went to the toilet and wiped I saw blood.

After 5 hours in emergency and lots of crying and my husband starting to get mad that they were making us wait

the triage nurse gave me a blood test and sent me home to see what happened (and told me I had no chance of seeing a dr or getting an u/s on the weekend.)

On Sunday 5th September, Fathers Day I had a miscarriage at home with my husband/son not really knowing what was going on. ( I told DH but he didnt REALLY understand what I would go through alone)

It was the hardest thing, to be alone, not knowing what was going to happen to me/the baby... all the what ifs and The overwhelmong grief that suddenly all our plans for the future had changed...

The only support I really had over that time was on here , The BB ladies as usual helped answer my many questions and offer support that I am so grateful for :) (Love you all xxxx)

my mum called but didnt really GET IT
My MIL didnt bother to call at all and still hasnt (which is a huge suprise to me)
and Evil Step MIL had her fair share of comments for me too

DH was an angel but now I feel so alone again
Everyone else is moving on
and im stuck :(

I lost our second baby at 11 weeks and 3 days
I will never forget that short time or DS kssing my belly willing you to grow


Thanks for reading

:hug:

The pain of losing a baby at 5 weeks, 10 weeks or 40 weeks is just so raw. Keep coming and talking to us. We're here for you :comfort:

:hug: :hug: sorry for your loss

I am so sorry :hug: :hug:

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your precious little one:comfort:

________________________________________________
:angel: Noah Thomas 20w5d :angel: 8w2d :angel: 5w2d
& 4 earth angels

So sorry for the loss of your precious baby.

Regards,
Dianne

:hug: So sorry for your loss

I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious bubba :( - know that we are all here for you :hug:

so sorry for your loss :hug:

I'm so sorry for your loss.

:hug: very sorry for your loss babe.

Iam so sorry huni. Massive hugs and you are in my thoughts xxx

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I'm sorry your precious babe couldn't stay. :hug:

How terrible for you, having lost 2 myself, I know exactly what you are going through hunny. Take one step at a time, as they say time is a great healer, but lest we will never forget our angel babies in heaven. I am thinking about you and your family at this very sad sad time. :hug:

:hug: :hug: :grouphug: :hug: :hug:

So sorry for your loss, we are all here...

I have no words, I'm just so sorry

Sorry for your loss sweetie. I was watching and praying for you to have different outcome through this - and may your angel baby be watching down over you xx

I'm so sorry for the loss of your much hoped for baby. Sending you giant cyber hugs and the hope that you never feel alone again. Thinking of you. Be gentle on yourself. :hug:

So sorry you have to go through this :( take one day at a time and look after yourself. xxx

I'm so sorry sweetie, huge hugs :hug: :comfort:

So sorry for your loss. :hug:

I'm so very sorry for your loss :hug: We are always here for you whenever you need x

I'm so so sorry for your loss.:hug:

xoxoxox

I'm so very sorry for the loss of your little one :hug: be gentle on yourself and give yourself the time you need to grieve :hug: so many people just don't know what to say when it comes to miscarriage, so they don't say anything at all. If only they knew it's not what they say, it's just being *there* that can help.

:hug::hug::hug:

I'm so sorry you're going through this and feel alone. You know that we're all here for you....

I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious baby. :hug: :hug:

I am so sorry :hug: I found out at 11 weeks and 5 days that the baby was gone (via u/s) but i started bleeding at 11wks and 3 days too.
I know u feel alone, its hard when ppl dont understand, (it didn't really hit my partner hard until this loss) but know that u aren't. There are so many ppl that have never met u and feel ur pain......it doesnt help straight away, nothing does, but i know writing it down on BB and having ppl reply validated my feelings, which does bring comfort to me now. Its also really hard to grieve with a 2 yr old (i have one too- 14/02/08), and i felt guilty for being so upset in front of him, but a dear friend of mine said to me that even though my baby isn't here anymore, i still have to divide time between them because they are both my children. I agree with that. Take care, i am here if u need to talk
xox :hug:

that is sooo sad i really hope you feel better soon even though it will take time ive had loses also and i know the pain of thinking about the future that they were meant to be involved in...

it seems our hospitals are really starting to fail us pregnant mothers in so many ways due to the fact that even though you showed up producing signs of m/c they still sent you home due to it being a weekend and low amounts of dr's... this is the worst part... i cant believe that you had to go through that at all.. i thought when you present with thesse sympotms you were meant to be a priority.. im sure they still have the equipment on at all times for emergencies ie. emergency room!!

i wish it had of been a different outcome and that you were still in bliss..
your angel will always be with you forever i believe they are your guardian angel...
i hope ur DS and DH will all be ok also **big hugs**

What you are going through is real, it matters and it has to be validated.

I'm so so sorry for your loss, and although you haven't had the support you needed in RL, please know that my heart goes out to you. I hope by sharing this with us, we can relieve even the tiniest amount of the burden of your pain and as each day goes on, your hopes raise again for the future, and the sorrow of today becomes less and less intense.

Never feel like you have to forget your baby! You were, are, and always will be that angel baby's mother. You deserve to take great pride in that.

Being stuck can really feel like there is no way out, no light at the end of your tunnel. Even though it probably doesn't 'matter' to you now, I urge you to keep in the back of your mind that as each day goes on, you can allow a little more happiness in.

You're lucky to have a hubby who loves you, and I know, they think differently, react differently and express things differently to us, but in his heart of hearts, he has probably been at a loss of how to help you. Sometimes, nothing helps, and he probably knows this.

Nothing will replace your baby, and nothing should.

It's time to take care of yourself. Let yourself heal. Cry, laugh, scream....Anything that lets you have a release. I will never understand why grief is so hard when it is something every person will experience in our lives, but take what you can get from it and remember that beautiful baby and keep your heart alive with love.

Take care, sleep well and know that you have like-souls here who will help you carry the weight of your burden when you don't think you can carry it alone anymore.

kimmi xx

I just wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss :hug:

I was in the TTC thread with you when you got your BFP (I think I had a different name then incase you don't recognize me), and I just wanted to let you know how sorry I am that this has happened to you.

I'm not sure what else to say so I will just send you some more :hug:

Im so sorry for your loss.

So very sorry for your loss.
Go gently.

I understand your feeling of being alone...no-one can quite understand the silent pain thats felt during and after a miscarriage except for those that have experienced it. Although you feel alone, I hope you find some comfort in the words people have shared here.

I am soo sorry for your loss

:hug:

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious baby :hug:

Thank you ladies for all your continued support :)

Im feeling a little better now Im concentrating on my hubby and son and trying to let my body heal....