How old were they when they stopped feeding to sleep, and was it their decision or yours? Was it an easy transition? Were they able to settle easily without feeding, or did you have to teach them new settling methods?
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How old were they when they stopped feeding to sleep, and was it their decision or yours? Was it an easy transition? Were they able to settle easily without feeding, or did you have to teach them new settling methods?
My DS stopped feeding to sleep when he was about 14 months old, it was his decision. I would feed him in the bed as usual but instead of falling asleep he would pull off when he was done and roll over to face DH who would then pat/cuddle him to sleep. It was an easy transition until about a month later he decided he no longer wanted to feed at night time at all. The before bed BF was always my way of settling him down for the night. Now one of us just cuddles him in bed until he falls asleep, he's never self settled so sometimes it's without a fuss and other times there is lots of wriggling and squealing. He is getting better though, we make a big deal of getting him into his jaamies, saying 'nigh nigh' and goodnight kisses for everyone. The past few nights he has gone to sleep without a peep. We just lie with him until he drifts off.
I'll still BF DS2 (10 months) to sleep - it mostly works when he's due to go down for the night (prob 6 out of 7 nights). Until 2-3 months ago, DS2 would also nod off before his mid-morning nap, but his sleeping habits have changed a little recently, so he'll generally stay awake after a feed unless it's his final BF of the day (7pm ish). Have my fingers crossed he'll continue to go to sleep on the boob at night for a while - makes life just a little easier when you don't have to muck (for want of better word) around trying to get them off to sleep. I think with DS1 (BF to sleep for prob 11-12 months) we just kept the same routine and just swapped boob for bottle. From memory he generally self settled though (he never fell asleep with a bottle).
I think Allycat and I are at the opposite end of the spectrum - it's been forever since we nursed DS to sleep.
DS used to fall asleep on the booby basically every feed, and we'd have to undress him, tickle his feet, do a nappy change between breasts, tickle his ears, blow on his face, etc, just to keep him awake long enough to have his full feed!
then when he hit about 6 weeks (not sure exactly when ... some time between 4 and 9 weeks) he just stopped falling asleep on the breast, and I don't think he's done it a single time since ... I miss that "milk drunk" look, and the increasingly warm little parcel falling asleep in my arms with the tiny dribble of milk coming out the side, but he just became more interested in looking and interacting, and so I guess he made the decision himself!
our bedtime routine is now normally that I get home (DH and DS pick me up at the station), I carry DS inside, we have a bath, I feed him (sometimes a little slurp in the bath, but normally just a proper feed once we're out) and read him a story, and then he goes to bed.
He sometimes takes a few minutes to self settle, but the longest it's ever been is 4 or 5 minutes.
We have some CDs we're happy to have playing as he goes to sleep, and we put one on, say goodnight, give him a little pat, goodnight kisses, and then pop the light off.
Oh, and sometimes if he's a little unsettled earlier in the routine, we do a massage between the bath and the feed. But we keep playtime really minimal in the evenings, and I see the whole routine being a settling method - he knows what is coming next, and the whole process is quite soothing.
HTH
Well, I bf DD at night time until she was 3 1/2. If she was tired enough, she would sometimes still bf to sleep at that age! It was bliss - the rigmarole getting her into bed when she didn't feed to sleep was sooooo much more difficult than a quick set down when she was already asleep.
She regularly bf to sleep until about 18 mths at night time. She was only on two feeds a day at that age. When she stopped she'd muck around a bit and we would go and settle her in bed. Story time came after bfing at this stage. Never had any trouble transitioning to not bfing to sleep, she just picked her time herself. Unless she was super tired and she'd crash on me. BTW I really loved it when she did it afterwards, felt like I still had that special bond and watching her sleep on me... awww... *sigh* She would also go back to sleep after her morning bf up until four. Which is partly the reason we kept going - I don't like being dragged out of bed at 6am - much preferred us both going to sleep!
I can guarantee DP preferred it when she bf to sleep. ;)
As a baby she stopped bfing to sleep at every feed at about 6 weeks, but she'd still do it for her early morning bf, her nap time bf and her night time bf.
DS1 was 2yrs 5mths and was only feeding to sleep so he weaned when I stopped feeding to sleep. I said that we weren't having Mummy milk anymore and I'd lie down with him till he fell asleep and he accepted that.
Thanks for all your responses, this is one of those things that I've pondered a lot recently, not because I am planning to stop DD feeding to sleep, just wondering when and how this might stop/change and it got me curious as to how it's worked out for others. Right now I love the convenience of being able to just feed DD until she drops off and the fact that it's so easy (most of the time.... as per my other thread!)
Sometimes DS will feed to sleep other times he won't. When he's finished his last feed before bedtime (whether he's fallen asleep or not) it's in to his cot for sleep!
DS has just turned 2 and is still feeding to sleep, he really only feeds at nap time and bed time and when he wakes in the morning, he can and does occasionaly just go to sleep with out it though.
DD still BF to sleep now at 20 months. We can get her to sleep if she's tired by just lying with her though and if she wakes up in the night. So I think the transition will go ok. I'm planning on trying to get her to start going to sleep without a BF soon before the next baby comes.
P fed to sleep at night and for daytime naps when I was at home (I had to return to work when she was 8mo) until she was 13 months. And that only changed because I chose it. We night weaned at that time.
I agree that feeding to sleep is soooooo much easier than anything else! But we were having other issues overnight and I felt I needed to night wean for other reasons. Then we weaned altogether at 14 months. Is sad - there are times when I wish I could just whip out a boob and settle her down.
At night, ds was still BF to sleep at 14 months, and then he stopped. Whether it was from moving house, or it was just his time, I don't know. I cried.
Thank you all for your contributions :) Did you find that night waking only stopped once you stopped feeding to sleep?
Cass72 - have you always popped him in the cot from the beginning? Does he go to sleep okay then?
Snacks - what method did you use to night wean? Did it take long/was it hard?
Sconeonamission - I'm sorry you found that change hard :(
We still do it. Mostly it is great, sometimes it is annoying. Never as annoying as trying to make them go to bed, because lets face it - a two year old NEVER wants to go to bed. It's pretty much torture for me to get her to sleep at night without feeding her... :rolleyes: So yeah... I thought she was growing out of it and actuall weaning a few months ago, turns out I was WRONG!
She started sleeping through this time last year. No corelation between feeding to sleep. She just started sleeping through for the first time EVER. She stopped sleeping through about two months ago when we all got pretty sick. She now wakes up once a night, around 3am, and calls out for us, and then she comes into our bed.
I will say though, anyone else can get her to sleep without feeding. Just not me.
Hi Swoop. Goodness no it wasn't always like that. I just persevered with it. If he didn't settle after a while I would re-swaddle him, give him a top up and then put him back down. Sometimes he had to be fed to sleep and that was ok too. Now we are (finally) at the stage that bedtime is bedtime and he will either fall asleep at the breast or he will self settle if he's still awake. I make as little as fuss as possible, just tuck him in, a quick kiss on the forehead, say goodnight then leave the room. Now we are practicing on getting our daytime sleeps sorted!
Oh I should add too that he still wakes up twice during the night and I do the same after each feed.
Bedtime is the only routine I've had any sort of success but hey its better than none LOL!! One last bit of advice.........my mantra: we can always try again tomorrow!! :)
Hi Swoop. Nope, DD sleeps through every night now (finally!) since around 16 months and we still feed to sleep. We did end up night weaning but still fed to sleep and I now feed her again if she happens to wake in the night. But feeding to sleep didn't stop her from learning to sleep through. I think it was just an age thing, she just eventually got it. Won't be long for you now :hug:
My DD slept through the night from a very young age (less than six months). :hide: So there was certainly no correlation between feeding to sleep and sleeping through. She went through a dreadful stage at about 16 mths with a lot of night waking, I bf her for a little while and then night weaned (clearly she'd done it without bfing for a long time).
Leasha - DD still comes into bed with us every night, any time after midnight, sometimes as late as 5am. But she's always there, snuggling into me, when I wake. :) It's a bit easier when they can do it themselves without waking you.
Grrrrrr...... you better hide under that chair!!!! :rofl: Seriously though, lucky, lucky you! What a precious little DD you have!:
I'm still feeding my DD to sleep (she is a week from 20months) and have no plans to stop. I figure whilst she is breastfeeding I might as well reap the benefits! it will be something we do until she weans completely or stops it herself I think.
:D I do know how lucky I am, Cass. But it seems like a distant memory now, in the whirl of school preparations and four year old attitude. ;) *sigh* I do miss cuddling that tiny baby that seemed to have so few needs. I guess that's one reason older wiser souls than I used to tell me not to sweat when she slept, fed, etc, that cuddling to sleep and feeding to sleep only lasted such a short period of their little lives that you'd look back on it with sentimentality. And I do!:
Ah, that's really sweet, and definitely just struck a chord with me :):
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TBH, she had kind of stopped feeding to sleep when we put her down for the night, except when she was REALLY tired. Most nights she would have a long feed in the dark in her room and then she'd fidget, come off the boob and smile etc etc. (So cute!) So I started feeding her until it was obvious she'd had enough, then I would put her in her cot because she was happy as larry with a full tummy. She always sleeps with a wrap, even though I don't often wrap her up anymore. She cuddles her wrap and I stay in the room playing a game on my phone sitting next to the cot or on a chair. I used to have to stay until she was asleep but nowadays it's just until she stops fidgeting around. I can leave and she is usually happy to settle herself (although sometimes she still wants me to stay or wants more cuddles etc. There's no hard and fast rule.):
Snacks - what method did you use to night wean? Did it take long/was it hard?
Through the night though, she was still feeding and taking at least half an hour to do so. I didn't mind this (gave me a chance to catch up on telly I'd recorded!) because with a full tummy she would usually sleep a good 4 hours at a time. But once this changed (and it wasn't just a phase - it was for a few weeks before I realised it had really changed) she wasn't drinking as much and taking longer to settle and waking REALLY frequently. So I replaced the feeds with cuddles, patting, rocking etc. I just did what worked.
It did take a while, over a week.
It was hard, there were many tears. She really didn't understand why she couldn't just snack on boob all night long. But I had made my decision so I have worn that responsibility. I provided plenty of love and company in exchange for the boobs. If I were more gentle I doubt I could've done it, TBH.
The other cost was that she weaned altogether shortly afterwards as my supply dropped immensely and I was working 3 days/week without expressing.
I HTH some. FWIW, I believe that if you are committed to a decision then you and baby can work through it regardless of which 'habit' you are trying to 'form' or 'break'. But if you and your DD are enjoying the pattern you've got going then I'd say hang onto it for as long as you can! :)
ETA: She still wakes up some nights, although with cuddles she settles quite quickly (usually within 15 minutes) UNLESS she wakes around 4:30-5am, in which case the only way she goes back to sleep is if I wrap her up and cuddle her for about an hour! If I try to put her down before she is REALLY asleep at this time then she just wakes up straight away and is unhappy.