DH working away... Who else is in the same boat??

Hey ladies!

Well as the title suggests, my DH works away. He does a 2 week on roster and 1 week home.

I'm having trouble with his roster and my ' TTC roster ' (so to speak!) it's just not a good feeling when DH is at work when and if I ovulate. :(

I know it's going to take a lot longer than the average healthy couple to conceive.

Does anyone have the same situation happening? And if so, how do you cope? Are you by yourself or do you have kids and is it harder with kids or without?

Thanks for reading and thanking you in advance for any replies! I'm going insane! (and he hasn't even left yet he leaves tomorrow morning :( )

Xx


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I think there is a thread with some members who have their other halves working away from them or in the defence forces or mines. I'll see if I can find it and post the link for you

:hug:

Thanks I tried searching before I posted but couldn't find anything.


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Okay so its on defence force families but these ladies may have some fabulous advice for you as I am sure they have faced the same problems as you are facing at some point. Hoe you canget soem good advice.

https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...ad.php?t=70013

Thanks alibaby but not quite what I was after. They are in a bit of a different circumstance than me. So this post will have to do! Thanks anyway!


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https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...=FIFO+Families

Some of us replied here...and there is an old thread in the conception section (like from 2007) about Fly in fly out and conception, will have a look for it...

There are a few of us around though, you are not alone! :)

Hi hun,

You know im only around the corner :) Its a **** feeling isnt it... before we knew we had problems in the fertility department I used to cry and cry and cry the night before he went back to work.

But yes, it is hard. DH was on a 2 and 2 roster when we were TTC this one and it was a PITA as he was away when I ovulated (I have a clockwork cycle so every month was the same)
We did a good 6-7 months like that and it was terrible because although we were technically TTC, it was all but a physical impossibility.
Think I said to you the other day that the bonus you have with the 2 and 1 is that it will rotate through your cycle, so some months he should be home when you O. Still a PITA though!

Where about is he working? Some places you can actually go and visit them, just depends on the the site and the dorm setup etc.

ETA: Oh, and it is MUCH harder having them gone when you have a child and creates so many more issues once kids get old enough to understand what is happening. Lots of issues "normal" people don't have to deal with.

He works for a minesite about 120kms north of southern cross. O can't get up to his campsite... He is 7hours drive away and I don't enjoy flying. I'm a nervous flyer. I had to drive up to southern cross once and never again! Scary on my own!

Thanks Amy and lime for the support. Yes a 2 and one roster still sucks! But yes your right lime! At least he is home for some o times!

He was home for the last ovulation and this one! (just- it helped that I o'd earlier!)

Guess I should be greatful that I had the chance to try to hopefully conceive this cycle.

It's just being on my own I can't handle. I have 3 dogs and they can't even keep me company very much anymore.

Gahh! I hate this. And he's not even gone yet! :(


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:hug: You will settle into it, trust me :)

I kind of like it sometimes now, still have my lonely moments, bedtime is the worst, but it does get better and easier, you will find the good stuff.

What is he working as? That is the hardest thing for me. When DH was doing the trucks, I could handle that no worries. Now he is a shotfirer, it is much harder. But I find things to keep myself busy, obviously DD keeps me on my toes, and will have a nb soon to worry about, but even before DD was born (I was already pregnant when he started) I learned to keep myself occupied.

Besides, will meet you Monday and we are all of 10 minutes away, we can be FIFO wifes together :) lol

The first 4-5 months were the toughest - would cry and cry, but he was just as sad to leave and only made him feel guilty, so you will learn to put on the 1950s wife face. lol

LimeSlice I thought I was used to it! I should be... He's been doing it for 5 years now. And same roster... He works as a mechanical fitter...only qualified for light vehicles but, he will bs starting heavy vehicle fitter upgrade on his qualification through Tafe I think so that means he could be home more.. Fingers crossed :) Are you doing anything before Monday? I'm going to be a mess tomorrow. Might need some company. :( and cheering up. Xx


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DH is back tomorrow morning off nightshift, so will sleep most of the day, but will see how he feels. If is up for watching DD then I will come visit. Or coffee on Saturday would be fab :)

I work thurs fri and sat finish at 4 on sat. So see how you go. If not definitely Monday. :) xx


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My DH works away on the mines too, same FIFO roster. Not as far away as your DH anymore, but it's impossible to go to see him as i dont drive and have 2 littlies in tow. He has been on the mines for six years now and the roster has varied between 4/1 , 3/1 and 2/1 . It was really hard TTC as he was away 85% of the time! We did manage by sheer luck to concieve on several occasions, My first boy, we concieved the day he was due to fly back lol DH never complained much though cos if it was O time and he was coming home he would walk through the door and i would pounce on him LOL sorry tmi!! My second child would not have been concieved had DH's car not broke down the day before leaving to go back, but he did and an extra 3 days home was just enough time to get UTD again :)

It is def harder with kids, for lots of reasons, especially when TTC cos you cant just do it there and then when the time is right, they are just way to nosey lol Also i have to keep a happy face for the kids which is really hard as the sob and bawl when he leaves :( it breaks my heart.

I def know what your going through and if you ever need a chat PM me :) If you do you will sometimes have too excuse my babble, i live in a smallish town and hardly socialise with other 'adults' so after days and days on end of chatting to a 3.5yr old and a 2yr old i crave adult conversation lol

Hope you will be ok tomorrow, be strong and try to be positive regarding the TTC. I will be thinking of you.



P.S. Limeslice My DH will be back tomorrow morning, coming off of night shift too! Just thought i'd say that :)

lol Jessikah - Thursday, the FIFO day!
DH works out at Kal, where are you guys?

Mine left just this morning. He is going to be living in country Vic and I am staying here in Syd. I'm not sure when I'll get to see him, it's a new job and he'll be instructing so will have to work around the courses. I'm hoping for a weekend every three weeks but we will have to wait and see. And we are hoping he can get at least a month off when I have the baby.
I'm a bit if a mess. He's been away lots before but this is long term and so unknown...but I get to talk to him and he will get to come home at some weekends not like if he was deployed.
What I'm most worried about right now is that he rode his motorbike down. He hasn't done a long trip like that on the bike and it scares me.

Mine left last Friday and is gone for 4 weeks. :( he's only home for DD2's birth for 2 weeks then gone again for another 2 mths. when he get's back that time, he leaves for Dubai which will be hard, 3 mths gone, 21 days home! :( Luckily I won't be TTC but It's still hard just the same and I can really hear in his voice how upset he is about being away but sucking it up for us anyway.
I really hope this gets easier!

And he's gone :( 12 days to go... And to make matters worse... Im in my tww! :s fun!


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my df has been short listed for a 3 month on / 1 month off position in afghanistan. i'm dreading hearing him get the job, but financially, we need this. we're on a property, that i hate being on my own on overnight. it's only 2.5 acres, but it's still enough to feel a bit isolated. ahh well, guess we'll wait and see.