Your Memory after children?

My memory is so shocking at the moment it is really starting to worry me.
I will be half way through a sentence and honestly can't remember what it is I was talking about until a few second/minutes later . Sometimes I can't remember at all and it makes my brain hurt lol, and I feel completely stupid !!

I can't even go shopping anymore as when I get in there, unless I have a list I will buy things I don't even need and forget the ONE thing I went to the shops for..Nappies!
I get back to the car an DH asked me where the nappies were....ummm on the shelf in Woolies!

Yes I know that some people say having children scrambles your memory a bit but for me it's getting really weird.
I have sat down at the computer about 4 times tonight and started looking at things and forgot that I came on here to check my email, still haven't checked it yet :doh:

Has anyone else experienced this or am I loosing it?

eeerrr yep! and it goes off the beaten track, over the hill and far, far away for the 2nd as well!

I would end up calling DH when i was at the shops, even when i had a list and he went through the trolley with me lol. I also forgot the word for ... eerr Ground - do you know how hard it is to explain to your boss over the phone that you are trying to say 'ground' and you can't think of the word, or any associated with it!!

I really struggeled with my first. I"m now used to being a half wit. I also explain to people if i look at them blankly, it's not them, it's me :)

You're not losing it... Mummy Brain exists I swear it!!!! I'm not sure if there's a physiological explanation for it, but I think DS takes over my subconscious which leaves my conscious with all that excess baggage the SC used to deal with, so I can't remember simple details... like where I put the keys, or why I'm pouring lemonade into the iron. (And what was I ironing?)

If you're seriously worried, get a notebook and write lists. That way if something needs to be done, you've got it there on paper to remind you.

Which reminds me... I should probably feed the dog.......

where was I?

Absolutely terrible! Lol. I struggle to remember what I did yesterday, and don't even try and ask me what I did a week ago... I just feel so stupid sometimes, but mine is mostly related to events rather than things iykwim.

Krystals- sorry but I had to :rofl: at lemonade in the iron..fizz fizz!

ETA: I just remembered (LOL) I have trouble speaking too..as dumb as that sounds. My words just seem to get all tangled up when I try and say something and end up all jumbled! I know i'm doing it and know how stupid it sounds, but I just can't seem to speak properly!

You are SO not alone!!
I was a fairly articulate intelligent gal with a really good memory before I had children - now Im a bumbling mess who forgets EVERYTHING!
I really struggle with it, especially not being able to communicate clearly - but its like my brain is just really s l o w and I often have what I call a "brain fart" (theres nothing there all of a sudden!)

I really hope it gets better, or someone finds a cure!!!

perfect example from right this minute....

Wondering why, after getting up to plug the laptop in, it still wasn't charging.... not only had I not flicked the switch on, but I'd actually plugged in the lamp :rofl:

:rofl: thats almost as good as pouring lemonade into the iron!!

:redface: maybe im just a ditz and it has nothing to do with memory :p

:rofl: I feel a lil less silly now. Silly lamp cord, it must have plugged itself in!
I hope you didn't burn your clothes with lemonaid.

oh great, now i feel like drinking lemonade - i prefer not to iron :ROFL:

see Deedles you aren't alone - there's a lot of us half-wits out there! Depressing isn't it hahahah

Deedles yep hear you, it does get better.

It's all about your processing memory, it's like you don't have quite enough RAM. The good news is the brain has been proven to have excellent re-wiring capability, so your faculties will return, I promise!

Interestingly, women's brains GROW by about 25% when pregnant. They do not lose this extra brain-power. (OK, brains don't actually grow, but the neurons inside develop and link and do stuff to give us extra brain-power.) However, research also shows (and I wish I could remember the paper, but how apt that I can't!) that once the baby is born, 50% of the brain (that's 50% of your 125% brain, so just over 60% of a non-mummy brain) is focussed soley on your offspring. So you are working the rest of your life with just over 60% brain-power.

Mothers have better brains, but only for their children!

(FWIW, my memory is now getting stronger and I blame a wonderful childcare centre with fantastic carers so I don't worry about my son much at work - I'm assured this happens to other women once children are at school or grown up, they need less of your brainpower on them at any one time.)

I'm so relieved to find this thread. DH and I were talking the other day about whether I would ever get it back.

That's all I have to say about that... On iPhone, and without the benefit of scrolling back I have no clue what you all just said! :rofl:

I agree - definitely related to having a busy brain and more stuff going on the in the background. I also reckon it is related to sleep deprivation - well at least here it is! xxx

Yeah that's true Mak, when sleep is good my memory improves.

A colleague told me about this article when I was pregnant with DD.

Kinsley, C, & Lambert, K 2006, 'THE MATERNAL BRAIN', Scientific American, 294, 1, pp. 72-79

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Pregnancy and motherhood change the structure of the female mammal's brain, making mothers attentive to their young and better at caring for them

Mothers are made, not born. Virtually all female mammals, from rats to monkeys to humans, undergo fundamental behavioral changes during pregnancy and motherhood. What was once a largely self-directed organism devoted to its own needs and survival becomes one focused on the care and well-being of its offspring. Although scientists have long observed and marveled at this transition, only now are they beginning to understand what causes it. New research indicates that the dramatic hormonal fluctuations that occur during pregnancy, birth and lactation may remodel the female brain, increasing the size of neurons in some regions and producing structural changes in others.

Some of these sites are involved in regulating maternal behaviors such as building nests, grooming young and protecting them from predators. Other affected regions, though, control memory, learning, and responses to fear and stress. Recent experiments have shown that mother rats outperform virgins in navigating mazes and capturing prey. In addition to motivating females toward caring for their offspring, the hormone induced brain changes may enhance a mother rat's foraging abilities, giving her pups a better chance of survival. What is more, the cognitive benefits appear to be long-lasting, persisting until the mother rats enter old age.

Although studies of this phenomenon have so far focused on rodents, it is likely that human females also gain long-lasting mental benefits from motherhood. Most mammals share similar maternal behaviors, which are probably controlled by the same brain regions in both humans and rats. In fact, some researchers have suggested that the development of maternal behavior was one of the main drivers for the evolution of the mammalian brain. As mammals arose from their reptile forebears, their reproductive strategy shifted from drop-the-eggs and-flee to defend-the-nest, and the selective advantages of the latter approach may have favored the emergence of hormonal brain changes and the resulting beneficial behaviors. The hand--or paw--that rocks the cradle indeed rules the world.

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Although this study involves rats, they are researching this in humans too. I comfort myself with the fact that my bad memory and ditzy-ness make me a good mother :D

I have a bad long term memory anyway, It sucks actually I don't remember things about how the kids did things as babies or things from my childhood. I even had to think before I could recall how DH asked me to marry him at one point!
But since having kids its just getting worse. Its that bad, that my oldest DS asked me where something was once & when I replied I couldn't remember, he asked me if I was pregnant LOL.

I can't remember what memory I had before I had the kids.

All the time. I forget what I was calling someone about as soon as they answer the phone.

I forget words, it's not as bad as it was right after having (each) DS. But things like ' DH can you pas me the, um, you know the stuff in the bag and you make sandwiches with it. Bread, that's it' are not uncommon at my house.

I went out and forgot to close the front door on more than one occasion, it was wide open for over 30 mins both times.

I also got money out at an ATM and left without taking it - lucky the person next in line was honest and called me back.

Paid for groceries at the shops and left without them.

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I can't remember what memory I had before I had the kids.

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:rofl:

ah I am so shocking at the moment, but i think its the combination of children and a busy lifestyle.
The kids always have something on and lately I have been forgetting everything..my phone and diary are now constantly on me
I do things like leaving the car unlocked and the keys in the ignition over night.