Please help me get DS to take an occasional bottle of EBM

DS will not take a bottle of EBM - ever! I really need (would like) DS to take a bottle every so often...I'd like a full night sleep every once in a while (DH is happy to do the 1 night feed on Saturday night) and when my mother-in-law sits wso I can run out and do errands without DS (which she kindly does once a week) I'd like to be able to not worry about how long it's been since the last feed.

What amazes me is that DS had to take a bottle in the hospital - because he was early and weight loss would have meant admission to special care - we gave him a bottle for the 5 hospital days (both formula and then EBM when it came in). Once home, for 2weeks we gave him EBM tops ups via bottle at almost every feed. Then we stopped because I was so worried that he'd reject the boob and only want a bottle - and now, he'll only take the boob.

I think I have tried every type of teats made and have spent at least $200 on teats in the hope that one of them would work with DS.

As a last resort, I am hoping that at about 6-7 months he will take EBM via a sippy cup as an alternative to the breast. Do you think that is possible?

you poor thing...that must be tough

i cant really offer any advice as both my boys were bottlefed from the get go...

Try the sippy cup now too - he may be able to manage it OK.

I had a similar thing - a bub who had mostly ebm for his first couple of months, and then decided bottles were horrid. This is what worked for us.

1) give bottle when he was not being cuddled or sitting on me - either with him propped on a cushion on the floor, or in his baby-chair or pusher.

2) get him sucking first -on a finger or the leg of a teddy (ew!) and then swap for the bottle

3) We had to have bottle days - I'd make 6*20 ml ebm bottles, and try for a few minutes each feed - and if it didn't work then move on to the boob.
eventually we got there - over several weeks. And it was a few weeks more before he would take a bottle for someone other than me.

See if he'll take it from a cup now, or even a spoon. Plenty of babies skip the bottle. My little girl certainly isn't interested, no matter how hungry or cranky she is, but will take 20mL or so from a spoon, enough to tide her over until mumma's back with the real thing.

But I just feed her right before I go anywhere, and I don't go for more than three hours. My heart starts aching after two anyway :)

Audax - I do the same - feed right before I go. I usually am not away for more than 2 hours either (and isn't it funny how you miss them so intensely even for a short period) but this past Saturday we were looking at childcare centres as our area had an "open day" of childcare centres and we got a call from the inlaws who were babysitting that DS was crying (hungry? who knows!) and we had to rush home...it had been 2.5 hours since last feed and we would had liked another hour. Walked in the door, put DS on the boob and all was fine but I wish we could have finished doing what we set out to do.

Have you tried the Pigeon bottles? My DS initially took a bottle of EBM, but then after a couple of months he refused. We tried Avent and Tomme Tippee, and I had just about given up when someone recommended the Pigeon. He still wasn't a big fan, but he would take the bottle eventually.

I agree with the sippy cup suggestion. Both my boys refused bottles but drank from a cup from around 3 months. If that doesn't work either, pop back in and let us know - there are a few other things I can suggest.

Its a nightmare isnt it??

DD would not take a bottle at all! And like you I spent so much on different bottles and teats to no avail.

I finally tried the peristalic teats by pigeon as they are supposed to emmulate the action of a nipple. She took it!!
I did have to be completely out of the picture so she couldnt smell me let alone see me then DH took her to her room and sat quietly with no distractions and she was sweet.

Now at 13 months she is hit and miss still. If she knows I am home then forget it but if she is aware Mum is out then she will take a bottle no worries (little madam aye)

Hopefully you havent tried these teats yet and they work for you like us.
Good Luck

Defo try the sippy cup.
I've had an LC feed W at 2 weeks from a normal cup.. It was so weird but it worked. She just held him and chatted and poured little mouthfuls in his mouth. You could give that a go.
I've also heard of people putting a bottle of ebm under their arm and switching from the bottle to the breast... Perhaps this would work in the reverse too.
Good luck!

i have tried different bottles, different cups, different positions, different temps, different people, diluting the EBM, adding fruit but my DD just spits it out once she tastes it. From 6 months she would drink water but not EBM no matter what i have done.

I havent read through all the replies so sorry if im repeating ;)

DS would only take a bottle of EBM if i wasnt there......and that means even if i was in the house and he knew he would refuse it flat out, if i tryed there was no way or if DF tryed and i was home he just wouldnt do it. It wasnt until he knew i wasnt there that he happily took it!

Thanks all. We've tried peristalic teats by pigeon - no luck...and DH has tried when I wasn't home (I got a phone call during my 2.5 hour movie outing with the girls !)...but we haven't tried the sippy cup - it sounds like that should be next. I think he really doesn't like "fake" nipples - he won't let a dummy near his mouth either.

I'm reviving this because we've had zero luck with anything...except we haven't tried sippy cups yet because I think DS is just too little (he won't suck so we'd need something that doesn't have a valve but he gags if the flow is too fast - he's even done this on my breast at certain times when they are "full"). My MIL has tried, DH has tried, FIL has tried - I've left the house - I've let him go 4 hours during the day when I haven't been home - he'd rather cry than take the bottle of EBM my husband offered. The MCHN suggested letting him go up to 6 hours during the day - I just can't do this - I had a hard time with the 4 (and that only happened by accident because I was late coming home from an app't but had left a bottle of EBM to try after 3 hours thinking I'd be home no later than 3:15 after prior daytime feed). Another MCHN suggested trying with the bottle for 45 minutes even if he screamed - something else I won't do (and nor will DH who would be the one on the front lines).

Should I just grin and bear it for now (as this can't go on indefinitely - see next sentence) - for now, it's really a matter of convenience - I'm not returning to work yet (only working from home part time starting mid-July). However, I will be returning to work in the office two days/week in mid-Sept (DS will be 9 months) and if he won't take anything but boob we will have a problem because I will be away from roughly 7-7:30am to 6pm two days/week. Should we hire a mothercraft nurse to help us? Would the fact that they are a mothercraft nurse even make a difference?

can u just use a syringe?

DS also will no longer take a bottle of EBM, is your DS on solids now?

My DS would take a little of EBM through a sippy cup but would prefer water! lol

You need to remember that if you are sure that you have given him a good feed before you leave that it is prob just a comfort thing and not a hunger thing and when you return he takes well to the breast because he wants you close! (does that make sense??)

I would say that whoever has him needs to try many things before calling you, taking him out in the pram to look at the trees? read a book, sing, anything TBH

does he have a dummy?

My DD wouldnt take a bottle at all. In the end we introduced her to the cups with a straw when she was around 6 or 7 months (I think) We got them from Woolworths.

She would never take EBM though. She would sometimes take formula from my mum when I was at work... and that was the only solution we could find.

I spoke to ABA and they suggested I was being to "hesitant" with the bottle and that breastfed babies are used to the nipple being further down. Maybe try putting the bottle right in his mouth? (Didnt work for us but worth a try?)

My Mum had a tiny bit of success using a spoon, alternating ebm with something she wanted, but bub still wasn't keen on the ebm. Can your carer bring bub up to you at work? This is what we did for awhile, until she was old enough and was eating enough and drinking enough water to get through the day.

Have you tried ebm with cereal?

it sucks i know

Unfortunately, it's not realistic to ask the carer to bring DS to me at work. She'd have to take the train and door-to-door it would be about an hour each way plus the time with me in the office. I think that's too hard on everyone including DS who needs to nap every 1.5 - 2 hours (and, he's a finicky one alright - he really prefers to nap in his cot).

Based on what people have been saying, sounds like my options are down to: sippy cup (or straw) with EBM when he's a bit older or trying formula in a bottle or sippy cup which I really, really didn't want to do as I have plenty of milk and wanted to keep it to breast milk so long as my supply is good but I guess a bottle or 2 of formula 2 days/week isn't so bad although it makes me sad for some reason.

buliej - here's a random thought for you - when giving your DS the bottle, is he just lying in someone's lap? I always BF my DD with her lying on a pillow across my lap (initially because I had a c/s and it was uncomfortable without a pillow, then we continued because she was used to it and so was I! If we're out though I BF without one). Anyway, if that's not something you've already tried, you could try lying him on a pillow and giving the bottle?

I know what you mean re the formula - I'm going back to work 3 days a week in a couple of months, and I had hoped to continue BFing. My theory was DD could have a feed before work and after work, and she could make do with water during the day (she'll be 11 mths at that point). But currently I'm having some BF problems as she has a cold and is only feeding once a day, and I am scared she is starting to self-wean :( I also feel funny about introducing formula, like you I don't know why but it does make me sad. I think because I LOVE the bond from BFing.

I hope you find a solution to your problem soon :)

I've never tried giving DS the bottle myself - it's always someone else who tries and usually when I'm not at home. Even if he took it from me, though, it wouldn't be much help as I really need him to take it from someone else.

Loula - didn't see your post yesterday - he's not on solids yet - he's only 22 weeks (18 adjusted) - and shows ZERO interest in putting anything in his mouth but a boob - OH - or his hands. He occasionally will put a toy in his mouth but not that often and for not that long - he's not into exploring things with his mouth like some other babies I've seen - but then again, he's the youngest baby in my mothers' group so I expect he'll start soon. I feed him 3 hourly during the day and when left with someone else he only starts getting fussy around the 3 hour mark and that's when they try the bottle. My MIL has been great - she's tried all those distraction things you mentioned as has my husband - it does keep DS from going crazy (meaning stretching out the time until I get home but the longest it has been is an unplanned 4 hours). and he will not take a dummy...at all. He can go 7.5-8 hours at night without a feed (not all nights, but recently some nights) - but I try to keep him really well fed during the day.

Sorry don't think my post was clear! I meant getting whoever is giving him the bottle (not you) to try it with him on a pillow :)

Thanks Mrs P - hmm, I do use a pillow when I BF but a BF'ing pillow - DH has tried with a normal pillow but not quite the same position (I don't think I can get DH to put on the BF pillow :) )- he and MIL have both also tired with DS facing out sitting forward/ sitting back - basically every position.