Printable View
So I have managed, somehow, to avoid having to get petrol while I have DS in the car. But df is going away for 2 weeks soon so it seems my lucky run is going to have to end :doh: consider it a stupid first time mother question, but do I just leav DS in the car while I run in to pay? What do you do?
I have a Woolworths credit card specifically so I can pay at the pump. If I have to go somewhere else I make sure I can move the car to directly in front of the building where the cashier is. I have been yelled at (by the cashier) but stood my ground and she apologized.
My friend was saying she moved her car to a car park right near the door to keep an eye on it and central locked her running car with the a/c on in summer. Her car let her lock it with the motor going though and she was always within sight of it. I don't drive but I really couldn't leave DD in the car while I went to pay. I'm paranoid like that.
It's like any of these type of issues, it is really up to you and as a parent at the time you will be able to make the decision you feel is best & as long as you are happy with that than that is all that matters. I would never leave my children in the car for a long amount of time, nor would I leave them where I could not see them, but yes if I get the pump right out front (the one I always go for) then I leave them in the car. But at the same time we have a coffee shop just a few streets away that is on a corner, I get a take away coffee often & always get kids out to get it as I can never park out front. You will know what feels right for you.
I have the same issue here. DH usually gets it, or I have DH, Mum or someone else in the car with me, or DS is left with someone. I left DS asleep in the car once, but it just didn't feel right. I wouldn't do it again. A friend found a full service station (yep, apparently they still have at least one in the country!) and uses that, even though it's a bit more expensive. It's illegal, and I have heard of people calling the police. They'd have to be pretty mean though.
Can you leave DS with someone or take someone with you? Or just don't drive much, lol!
There was a thread started a while back on the same subject.
https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...t-u-do-158677/
i agree that it needs to be whatever you feel comfortable with. i do leave DS in the car while i pay for petrol - like everyone else it's within eyesight & i run in & out, small petrol station & no queue. it's the only time i leave him in the car though - i know people who leave their kids in the car while they go to the atm or similar but, for me, petrol is the only thing i'm comfortable with.
I try and do it while DS is asleep. I just lock the car and go in.
If it looks really busy, or is one of those 30 bowser truck stop type ones I take him in with me.
I don't often have to fuel up but on the odd occasion I have to, I leave Moo in the car. I never would've done it while he had separation issues :lol: I lock the car & leave the windows up. If it was busy I'd probably take him in with me, same goes if it was hot.
For some reason this is the only time I ever feel comfortable doing this. I take him with me everywhere else, even just to get a takeaway latte.
Each to their own. We don't really have any big petrol stations here, most are small so whichever bowser I park at, I can see the car from the counter inside and if the kids are quiet/asleep, I happily lock the car and leave them in there. If there's a big line-up on a hot day, or they're fussing, I'll take them in (can't leave the a/c on if the keys are taken out), but most of the time it's not busy so I just whip in quickly and pay while keeping one eye on the car to make sure they're okay. I've done this with them since they were newborns, I find it a hell of a lot faster to just lock the car and go in to pay by myself, than to unload one or both squirming kids and try to get them safely into the building:) You'll know what feels right - some days I leave them, other days I take them in, just go by what feels 'okay' for you. FWIW I've never had anybody even second-glance me when I've left the kids in the car, I'm sure most people understand why I do it even if they choose not to themselves :)
I've also avoided getting petrol when with DS - but on the occasions I've had to, I leave him in the car while I pay - it has never taken more than 2 minutes to pay and it completely stresses me out - but I can see the car from the counter. That being said, I was talking about this with another new mother and she told me that someone told her it was illegal to leave your child unattended in a car at a petrol station. Sounds really weird to me, as technically isn't it illegal to leave your child in a car unattended full stop (not that the legality of it all is why we don't!).
I try not to fuel up with kids in the car if I can help it. But otherwise I unwind the windows a crack and lock the car when I go and pay. I know some people feel you should never leave a kid unattended in the car (I used to be one of them) but there is no way I can get all three out just to pay - even if by some miracle they were all being angels and were willing to do as they were told and get back in afterwards. Truth is that it is much more dangerous for me to be getting them out of the car and dragging them into the shop area. I do try to go to fuel stations that aren't very busy too, makes it much easier and quicker.
It is actually a 'grey' area under the law. It isn't downright illegal, but depends on circumstance and discretion. Basically it isn't illegal to leave children in the car provided they are still within veiw of the guardian / parent. But the law is very much open to interpretation. If any police officer ever tried to charge me with such a thing, I am pretty certain that I would be able to get that charge overturned in court. ;) In some states in America it IS illegal, and I think this is another area of the law where people get confused because so much of our media comes from overseas.:
Yes it is illegal, by the letter of the law. It differs in each state. This is just an example of NSW legislation. In most States if you move more than 3m away from the vehicle it is classified as unattended.:
NSW
The Children and Young Persons (Care and Protection) Act 2000. Section 231 of the Act reads:
A person who leaves any child or young person in the person’s care in a motor vehicle without proper supervision for such period or in such circumstances that:
(a) the child or young person becomes or is likely to become emotionally distressed, or
(b) the child’s or young person’s health becomes or is likely to become permanently or temporarily impaired, is guilty of an offence.
The maximum penalty is $22,000.
I only go to petrol stations where they put mine in for me and take my money. So I just need to make sure I have cash, which isnt hard. That way, i dont even need to get out of the car, let alone walk away from it.
Well guess I don't break the law then as I always take the keys, lock the car and go in and pay. and my girls never get distressed or become impaired.:
I do wait for the pump closest to the door or I move the car.
There is not a chance I am going to take my 2 and 3 year old out while I'm 38 weeks preg and drag them inside. I'm having enough trouble just getting them in the car at the moment.
I used to always go bp and use pay at the pump bur they have taken that away now. :(
This thread is sure to turn into a **** fight as all the others have before, so before you pass judgment remember what you do with your kids is your choice, likewise for others. I have no probs with people taking their kids in to pay, but it's not something I do. :)
I fill up, then move the car to somewhere I can park it (so I leave the pump free so I dont potentially hold someone up if the come in behind me) and take DS in. The central locking on the car is broken, so I cant lock it so definitely dont feel safe leaving DS in there. But even if I could lock it I would still take him in. I'm a bit paranoid haha
It is just common sense, you basically do a risk assessment of the situation and make your decision based on that.
Things like:
State of the kids, are they awake, restless, sitting quietly
Distance from where you are to where you need to go, like have you been lucky enough to get a pump close to the door
How busy is the service station
The weather of the day, hot, cold, wet, dry
I have done both, left kids in the car, taken the keys with me & locked it, and other times dragged kids out of the car to pay for the petrol, which can be a nightmare because of all the sweets/lollies by the counter. I make a judgement call for myself in each individual situation.
You do what is best for you, in your situation, at that point in time.
I agree.:
It is not very often I don not have my little ones with me and with a 17mths old, 2.5yr old and a 3.5yr old it would be much more dangerous to get them out then leave them in the car.
I always use the closest bowser to the doors and they are never distressed or upset when I go.
If only have one then I tend to take them in (very rare occurrence)
I never ever leave the kids in the car to pay. Even if there asleep. Too many times you see on the news storys of how parents did do that only to have the car taken. Yes the likelthood of that is small but i always think how would i feel the one time i do that that happens. Theres no price you could put on your childs safety.....and for the extra 5-10mins it takes to get them out, i dont see why you would risk it. BUT that being said that is MY choice and my reasons why. Each parent needs to choose whats right for them
I have 3 kids 4 and under. I always leave them in. I lock the doors and make sure they are in sight. Fortunately I dont have to get petrol that often when they are with me.
For me I see chances of my kids getting hit by another car is greater than somebody stealing your locked car without keys. (not questioning your choice family of 3 just offering a different view point :D)
i've only got one child. I fill up, with her in her carseat. Then get her out, and we go into the petrol station together. The thought is always in the back of my mind, that some idiot will hotwire my (old bomb) car for a joyride, take off with my DD in the backseat, while i'm paying for petrol. i always tell her, "you can replace things, but you can't replace people".
We don't have car a/c, so in summer particularly, the car is so hot (another reason i can't bring myself to leave her in the car).
i haven't paid too much attention, to what the law is on this, i just do what i feel is right for me and DD. Maybe i'm just a paranoid single mummy.
i do make attempts to fill up when DD is in kindy, to avoid the situation when i can. But when i see petrol cheaper than usual, and she's with me . . . . then we go in together.
Sometimes i go to an out of the way petrol station, to get driveway service, still have to go in to pay though.
When bilby was smaller, i had to put an animal harness on her, to go in and pay. I cannot imagine going in with multiple kids, that must be such a challenge.
i can't think of one petrol station that lets you pay at the pump, maybe i am just ignorant about that service. Sounds good.
I am like RB with a 3.5, 2 and 9 month old I dont feel it's safe to get the kids out at the service station. I can see them and I don't have to worry about keeping them away from cars and also the lollies inside. I always have the keys and lock the car.
I don't fill up. And I never will. My DH does it, and if there's no fuel, I walk.
Audax, that would be a dream! If only the petrol fairies would fill mine. I hate getting petrol.
Bring back driveway service I say!
Same here.:
It does irritate me a bit so many petrol stations are removing the option to pay at the pump. If a supermarket can do it, why can't a fuel station? Besides which, having worked as a console operator I used to love them as at least then I didn't have to watch them like a hawk so they didn't nick off without paying (which is incidentally why those who move their cars closer get watched so closely until you come in and pay).
Personally though - it depended on the situation. Hot days or busy servos and I'd bring DD in with me, if she was asleep and everything felt ok, I'd leave her
I leave the kids in the car. I have more than one & its too dangerous to have them running round a servo.
If I have DD on her own, I'll go to the smaller, more exxy servo so she's closer. They often have driveway attendants so if I'm lucky I don't even have to get out!
Its your choice. I take the keys & leave a window down.
I take DS in with me to pay. It's really not that much of a hassle getting him out of the car etc and he likes to get out of the house so that's all just part of the outing ;)
I think it's each to their own. Do what's right for you.
When DS1 was a baby I nearly always left him in the car, but with DS2 I nearly always took him in to pay (I generally did a petrol run on a day when DS1 was in daycare).
TBH my reason (with DS2) was less to do with fear of someone stealing the car with him in it, it was more a fear of DS2 being trapped in a car if there was a fire at the petrol bowser. There was a spate of bowser (petrol pump) fires either before DS2 was born, or just after, and while I'm not a nervous nelly, nor do I freak out easily, it got me thinking about DS2 being in the car if there was a fire at the petrol station. Even now, if one of the boys is with me when I fill up I'll take them in with me. I'm just not comfortable leaving them in the car.
I leave DD in the car to pay. She hates being moved in and out of her carseat so leaving her and locking the car is more suitable for us than dragging her out screaming then putting her back in screaming even harder. Plus I rarely have to wait and can ALWAYS see the car
I've done both - if asleep I'll leave him and dash in, or if he's happily occupied I have too, other times I've taken him in with me, but it is rare that I fill up alone. I tend to fill up on the weekends so DH and I are together and then one of us obviously stays in the car with DS. If I am starting to run low on petrol then that night after DS has gone to bed and DH is home, I shoot around and fill up. As our petrol reminder goes off with about 80kms to go, its rare that I would need to fill up alone. I tend to fill up well in advance regardless of the price of petrol as I'd rather pay a few dollars more and reduce the likelihood of needing to get petrol with DS.
I've also left him in the car to get money out of the ATM, but fortunately our local ATM usually has parks directly in front of it (eg within about 2 metres) so I wind down the windows and chat to him while I get money out and he's completely safe, happy and within sight :)
I would never take my kids in to pay. They are aged 5, three and a half and 8 months. If I fill up I do at our local petrol station. I can see the car and always leave it locked. Like others have said, IMO there is more chance of them being hit by a car in the station's driveway than being abducted with the car (I figure even a good car thief would take at least 30 seconds to break in and start the car, by which time I would be running at them like a banshee ready to rip their head off).
I would be very confident if questioned by police in regards to my decision. I am also quite confident of defending any charges related to child abandonment in court.
I always take DS in with me. I'm not a paranoid mum, I just don't feel ok leaving him by himself.
That being said, my DH fills up, and then (like some others below) moves the car up to the door, locks the car and keeps a weather eye out.
It's one of the few things we do differently - and we accept the validity in each other's POV.
But we almost always now just get gas when we're both in the car, so we don't have to haul DS out for a 90 second transaction, or leave him alone! One of us fills up and pays, the other does the windscreen and stays with bub.
That all being said, I raised the exact same question at our MHCN group when DS was only a couple of weeks old, and the MHCN (and about 1/2 of the group) said not to be ridiculous, and that nothing was going to happen to him in the 2 minutes we were apart. But the rest of the group just didn't feel ok with that answer, and said that they also took their baby with them to pay - even though it's a bleeding hassle.
So it's a valid question, with completely understandable arguments each way (particularly when taking into account multiple children, or kids old enough to run around, beg for lollies, and possibly get hit by another car).
Decide what's right for you :hug:
One more thing to consider is people hijacking cars. Remote possibility I know but it does cross my mind, especially if you have an expensive car. I've left him in their once and didn't like not being in control and him being so far away. He is always within arms reach, it just didn't feel right.
Thanks everyone, it's awesome having opinions from both sides, as majority said I might just see how I feel at the time. I tend to go to the smaller less busy petrol stations and if I time it right I no for a fact it will be quiet so therefore I can either leave him where I can see him and dash in and out in a second or I'll have the time to get him out without holding anyone up, thanks again, it really helped :)