[VENT] She stole my baby's name!!

I'm not impressed.

My sister just rang me to tell me that her SIL had her baby last night. She was fuming on the phone and proceeded to tell me that SIL has used my DD name. Not just her first name, (first names are fair game) but she has used my DD first name and middle name. My DD middle name is my middle name and my mum's middle name and has absolutely no relevence to her family. She was asking a while back about DD middle name and we knew then she was considering her first name but we didn't think she was asking her middle name so that she could use that too. I'm really annoyed about it, we thought long and hard about what we were going to call our DD and I understand that somewhere out there there would be another little girl with the same name but not in our family. My sister now has 2 neices with exactly the same name, my nephews now have 2 cousins with exactly the same name!!!! It's just weird, isn't it?

Not just weird but a little scary as well. That fact that she actually asked what your DD's middle name was 'because' she was thinking of using it as well. Not cool - and slightly unhinged.

That's so random! Weird that she would insist on using both first and middle name when your DD is already here! I mean, 'stealing' a baby name when someone is still early in their pregnancy or not expecting yet, I can *kind of* understand (not really, because I think it's a really pathetic thing to do - what, like there wasn't even ONE other name out of the hundreds of thousands of names in the world that you liked even a little bit?), but for her to use both names for her newborn when she knows full well there is already a Xxxx Xxxx in the family (even extended), that's just outright creepy. Gah!

Totally weird!!! I'd be really angry too.

that is very weird and i would be ****ed off big time

Weird. I am assuming that you don't also have the same last name? I can understand that would be frustrating as it seems so deliberate.

Different last name, that would be even weirder again. I'm really not impressed, surely there were other middle names out there she liked the sound of. I just wouldn't do that ever.

Weird. So weird. I would be peed off too.

That's not ok. I'm going with a little bit unhinged too...

I'm thinking Single White Female unhinged - she hasn't started getting her hair cut like you has she? :shakehead:

Very very weird!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And the poor other kids that have to cope with 2 cousins with the same name that are not that different in age!

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I'm thinking Single White Female unhinged - she hasn't started getting her hair cut like you has she? :shakehead:

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LOL now that would be freaky.

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I'm thinking Single White Female unhinged - she hasn't started getting her hair cut like you has she? :shakehead:

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I hope not, it's so odd. I'm not sure what I'm going to say when we see her at the next family do or what she will say. "Oh hi, I stole your baby's name".

Well at least the family will know that you had the name first so it automatically makes her look a little odd for doing it in the first place. However my own SIL (as in married to DH's brother) has a brother and a sister who both had baby girls 3 months apart and they both have the same first name. I just don't get why you would do it in the first place?

Weird. Very weird. Not on.

My brother and his wife were pg 4 weeks after us, so we actually discussed names quite early on to make sure we *weren't* falling in love with the same names! And we let each other know what names were off limits (because SIL and I each had one name we'd set our hearts on a few years prior) ...

I feel bad for their daughter ... I think there's going to be embarassment there for the rest of her childhood, quite seriously. she will be the second, the copycat, the "other" Prudence Grizellda (that's her name, yes? ;)) ... because your daughter is already here ...

I just feel bad for her - and peed off, on your behalf!

What were the parents thinking? That no one would notice?

Even if the name is perfect (and hey, clearly Prudence Grizellda is) there are other fabulous names out there. Like Wilhemina Lollipops. Or ...

Whoa. Too weird and to ask what your DD's middle name is and then use it. WTF?!

I don't get why she'd even do that.

Defeinately SWF.

At a function, I'd probably say, "poor baby, not getting her own name. What were you thinking?" Then step back and watch the reaction.

Poor poppet. It is sad she doesn't have her own name. it's not like there's only a couple to choose from.

wtf? How creepy!

tashy- love it! I wanna be a fly on the wall if that were to happen.
Definatly weird.

I just got a call from my sister and because she got so upset about her stealing my DD name they have changed her middle name, thank God. Maybe she did it just to cause a stir!

If she will change it that easy obviously she wasn't that attached to it.

That's very strange and I can see why you are upset. My BIL did something similar so kinda know what you are feeling. He always said it was lame that we were planning on using a family name as DS1's first name, but when he had kids he used it as his firstborn's middle name. Then when he had another son he gave him DS1's middle name as a first name, and another version his first name as a middle name. I dread to think what they will call, their next child :(

She sounds like an attention seeker. I'm glad she changed the name.

I'm relieved too, It's a really weird thing to do!

:hug: hun, i am glad they are changing the middle name and i think it is a little odd to have both the first & middle names the same especially when they know it's exactly the same as your DD.
However when i was younger my dad had a very close friend (my godfather) who also named his daughter L (i was born first), iw as given my mums middle name as a middle name but it also had meaning to them as a family (although at the time my mum didn't know that), in the end they decided against it (as i was already named that) but to this day we joke that i am his L.M :)

If she has done it as an attention thing i think it's so so wrong, if they loved both names and it DID have significant meaning to them then i still find it a little odd but we all have our reasons for choosing our babies names, who is anyone else to decide why we can't use a particular name?
I'm not downplaying your feelings at all, i completely understand why it would be so frustrating (i'd be annoyed if it happened to me) but i think it comes down to personal choice, if they want to confuse everyone and make it hard for themselves then i say play it up.. take it as a compliment and brush it off.... but you don't have to worry, they are changing the name now :)

must be the time of the year for it
my SIL just had a bub the other day and called its name nearly identical name to my oldest son!!!
WTF
and more stranger- when you shorten both names- they are shortened to exactly the same name!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and they are both really unusal names too!!!
I was soo peaved off when i found out
and my son was upset that she called the baby nearly the same name as his!!!!
FFS- there are plently of names out there!
so my poor kids grandparents have 2 grandkids with the same name!!!
xmas is gonna be fun!!

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How frustrating! I don't understand why someone would do that? :shakehead:

It's just plain weird! I agree so many names out there, why is it necessary!

That is very weird and even weirder that they were so willing to change it, why even choose the name to begin with??

I found it weird that my DP has a cousin who is about 10 (give or take) years younger than him with the same name.. i found that really odd. My DD has a similar name to one of my nieces and i did ask my SIL if she minded we called her that name and she just laughed and said she didnt care which was great as we were stumped for names!

But to deliberately seek out a baby's name and then use it on your own is just plain WEIRD!

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Very very weird!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And the poor other kids that have to cope with 2 cousins with the same name that are not that different in age!

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I have two cousins with the same name. It's never been hard for me to cope with.

It's a little odd, but you haven't used something like Ann, Lee, or Rose, have you? Those are pretty common middle names.

Sounds like she might have already thought of that name, couldn't remember if you used it or not, and even after finding out you had, decided they loved it too much to think of something else.

I'd take it as a compliment on your awesome name choosing abilities! ;) Does your family and DD have much to do with her? (FWIW, we like one of the names of my cousin's DDs and given the difficultly we're having in choosing names, we won't be ruling it out based on that).

But I can understand that it seems a little odd...

That is bizarre!! Glad she changed it :)

My brother has 2 god sons, one is DS and the other is his friends son (who I haven't even met let alone have any relation to) but they both have the exact same name.

I just thought of something... a good friend of mine was pg, while she was pg her cousin's cousin or something had a little girl and my friend told me that they had named her the exact name that she had picked out for her bub if it was a girl. :o

It was just a random, freaky coincidence! They hadn't discussed names... it just happened. So my friend was all torn about what to do and decided to deal with it when the baby was born, as they didn't know if it was a boy or a girl. Guess what, it was a girl!

So they named her what they wanted to. They hadn't copied, it was a geniune name they chose before this little girl was born. Its a more distant relative than what it sounds like yours is Babyluv, but it can happen - it can be just a coincidence.

This thread has happened sooo many times in reverse,the first thing I thought was your SIL on another forum when you announced your DD's name:

SIL: I'm so upset, my SIL just said she's naming her daughter X Y, I've loved that name for a girl since I was 5 years old.

Others: Are you sure it's the same name, you should check.

SIL: I checked, it is.

Others: Just go ahead and use it anyway, are you really close to her? Do you see her all the time? I think it'd be a really nice bond between cousins, she should take it as a complement, nobody owns a name etc etc.

:rofl: that was my first (silly) thought :)

On DH's side of the family it is tradition to name the first boy after their grandfather. There are five cousins including DS16 with the same name, they actually think it is special. They all have nicknames though to avoid confusion when all together lol.

Regards,
Dianne

It's VERY weird but unfortunately totally out of your control. You may as well start making the jokes about being flattered etc........which is sucky but they aren't likely to change the name. It's something I would never ever ever do though. I feel sad for you.