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My mum asked me today if she could come to the 20w scan. I think she only wants to know what sex the baby is but I dunno I feel a bit weird about it? She did say she does want to attend an ultrasound. But I'm having alot of scans so there will be a few more she can come to anyway. Did anyone else have their parent/s come to their scans?
I had my mum come to one scan with me, but other than that I had no parent or inlaw geographically close enough to me to come. However if you are feeling funny about your mum coming then perhaps you should go with your gut and invite her to a later ultrasound instead.
My mum came to a few when it was early days and I was having issues but DH came to most instead.
Are you going to find out the sex at this scan??
Personally, I'd wait. If you're having more scans then I'd just say that they can come to a later scan.
How far along are you?? Is this your first scan?
Df would be coming too. I don't mind her coming to the later ones. We will find out what the sex is. I'm having another scan at 16,20,28,32. I'll even ask for one at 24 too. Maybe she just doesn't want to feel left out? She has to fly over from Perth for it anyway
Mum came to DS2's 20wk scan when we found out he was very sick. I think that was traumatic for her but then it was for us too. It helped us that she was there. She was then able to do the phone calls etc to family as we werent up to it. Later on, she was there at his birth. For us, it was fine that she was there. She was also there for DS1's 20wk scan.
We had a 3d/4d ultrasound at 32 weeks (I think) that we invited my mum to. She loved it :)
My mums was super excited and came along to DD's morphology scan.... She came in for the first part and then left when DH and I found out the gender! Was lovely to have her there!
I think it's because she hardly saw me all DD's pregnancy and look the way it turned out. :/
I think I'll just let her come. At least she asked right?
*hugs* hun! FWIW we had major dramas at my first scan with DD1 - my mum wanted to come in and just assumed that only 1 person would be allowed, so she actually had the gall to take a few digs at DH in the clinic waiting room, suggesting that he should just stay out of it because *she* was the grandparent... in her defense, DH and I had only been a couple for 4 weeks when I fell pg so nobody was really convinced he was going to stick around, I think mum was just trying to establish her authority over him in the relationship stakes (she's always been a little narcissistic like that, everyone must defer to her and give her whatever she wants or there's hell to pay). Anyway, long story short, I just asked the u/s tech if we could grab an extra chair and it was all good, both mum and DH got to see our little parasite wriggling away and waving arm and leg buds around.
But yeah, if you don't feel comfortable having her at the 20wk scan, let her know she's welcome to come to a later one - tell her it'll be better that way because she'll be able to see more detail as bub grows bigger :) Your pregnancy, your rules... but try your best not to leave your mum out, she is probably trying to make a really good effort this time because she probably feels guilty about not having spent more time with you while you were pregnant with Hayley. xx
I'd let her go to at least one of your scans....if you don't feel comfortable with her being at the "big" 20 week scan, invite her to another. Who knows, baby maybe not spread his/her legs at the 20 week scan and she may not miss out after all if she goes to a later scan?!
My mum came with me to my morphology scan with my DH. My sister came to an emergency u/s I has at 14 weeks due to bleeding. I'm very open to anyone and everyone sharing the experience lol
Are you going to have a 3d/4d scan done at some stage?? Because if you are going to you could say come to that one intead because its more than just an ultrasound (if that makes sense).
:hug:
My mum came to 20 week scan, because DH wasn't able to come, and I wanted someone there JIC there was something wrong.l
Mum loved seeing the bub.
My mum came to our 12 week scan - I invited her as she worked in the hospital where we were having it done. To keep things 'fair' we then invited my MIL to the 20 week scan.
I'm actually really glad we shared it with them, as it's been 25+ years since they had babies, and things had changed so much they were just in awe. It meant also that they asked all the questions of what was on screen etc, so DH and u could listen when we rated, and just focus watching our little one together.
My parents (and DSD) were able to come into the Ob's office to watch my last u/s. They loved it, was very emotional for them.
I wouldn't invite them to the 20w scan though. For such a big scan, I just want my DH there.
She'll find out the sex soon enough hun, maybe see if she can come to your 24w?
My mum only came to one appt of mine, and it was because she asked too. Weeks afterwards she told me that she had an instinct that she needed to be near me, not necessarily to 'see' the baby, but to be near me. Im so grateful she did ask me and DP. It was the only one she asked to come too, and the only one I ended up needing her for.
Im so happy for you and your DF Ahurani. Enjoy it as much as you can.
xxx
I second the 3d/4d one if you're going to have one done - it's a lot less of a medical/diagnostic situation and more just for fun/bonding. Or a later scan if you're uncomfortable with her being at the morphology scan.
We decided against having DD come along to the morphology scan just in case something was picked up and instead booked a 3d scan at 25 weeks - the pressure was off, there were no surprises and she thoroughly enjoyed it. Bit of a different situation with a grandparent I guess but may be a suitable compromise.
My mum came to the first 3 babies 20 week scans, but mainly cause hubby was at work, she was in awe of how things had changed in the years
My mum came with me to a scan for dd1, but I was having weekly US due to IUGR so by then DH was sick of coming lol
My mum came to all of DD's scans (we had four) and the first of DS's. I'm not too sure why she came to DD's - if she invited herself or if we asked her, but we wanted her there and she wanted to be there. It was wonderful that she was, as we found out things looked really bad and I needed my mum.
DH was great of course but he was just as shocked and devastated as I was so he was a little bit lost to me, ITMS. Mum held my hand, let me cry, stroked my head, made soothing noises and gave me tissues. General mum behaviour.
She then came to the rest to make sure things were ok. She came to the first of DS's scans but everything was fine and she didn't come to the second one. I think she looked after DD :)
Good luck hun. You do whatever you feel is right for you, DF and junior.
my mum came to all 3 of my 18 week scans with all 3 pregnancies. I liked sharing it with her and DH.
Its a personal choice and if u decide not to let her just tell her ur only allowed ur partner in with u and u can show her the dvd
I've invited both the Mums to the 20 week scan (in 2 weeks time). I would love for the Dad's to be there too... but I think have 5 guests in the room is pushing it a bit.
My SIL invited my mum to her 20 week scan and mum was amazed at how the technology had improved. Hence why I want the mums to come to mine.
DH couldn't make Liebling's 19 week scan, so I invited MiL. Bless her, she thought she wouldn't be allowed into the scan room but came anyway. She'd never seen (or had) an ultrasound before. (BTW, I still haven't told my own mother about this.) I mostly invited her because sitting around waiting a couple of hours for a 5 minute scan is my idea of boredom and I wanted someone to chat with.
DH got the 8w, 12w, 21w and ~30w scans though, so all was good there.