Applying for new jobs without telling current boss?

So... I hate my job. Not just the general hate where everyone has a little whinge about their work, I seriously hate everything about it. There's not a single redeeming aspect I can find right now, and it's slowly destroying me. The problem is I need to earn money for us to get by and this job pays really well for a four day week.

I've considered dropping to three days a week and finding someone to job share for the other two but I don't think that's going to cut it. I hate my days now, I hardly see DD and I have to bring work home with me. Today I was home because DD is sick, but I had to keep working. Tomorrow's my day off but that doesn't mean work will let up. I'm finding I can't give 100% to anything, the work, DD, DH all suffer. Today I was gettingcranky at DD because she needed cuddles and every work thing I tried totally stuffed up. It wasn't her fault but I just couldn't look after her and try to work, not to mention the house looking like a bomb site.

Then tonight I found a job in the paper. A receptionist position in a real estate office. It sounds perfect for me. I'm easily qualified for the role, I can leave work at work and I've always been interested in real estate - maybe one day I could do extra training and move up in the company? It's also 30 minutes closer to home and 20 minutes closer to DD 's daycare than my current job.

So, I really want to apply, but seeing as I've only been back at work 5 weeks I don't know how they'll take it. And I don't want to tell them in case I don't get the job - they don't exactly treat you well when they know you want to go but can't.

What would you do?

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I have never told a current employer that I'm looking for a new job. Employers understand that their employees aren't going to be there forever. Your only obligation is that, if you are offered the new job, you give your current employer whatever notice period is in your contract.

You spend waaaay too much time working to not like your job, let alone hate it. If I were you I'd apply for the job you've seen. Good luck.

I wouldnt tell your current employer - there's no need at this stage. Nothing wrong with putting in an application and seeing how it goes.

Your current job sounds stressful, i hope you find sonething better/more suitable soon :)

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I have never told a current employer that I'm looking for a new job. Employers understand that their employees aren't going to be there forever. Your only obligation is that, if you are offered the new job, you give your current employer whatever notice period is in your contract.

You spend waaaay too much time working to not like your job, let alone hate it. If I were you I'd apply for the job you've seen. Good luck.

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I agree. I've never told the current employer either. Best of luck with it, there is nothing worse than being trapped in a crappy job.

Kaytee, I think we are in a very similar spot!

I'm in the process of applying for new jobs at the moment, my current job is destroying me, resulting in tears, stress and me being a completely horrible person to live with.

I have had second interviews for 3 different roles and hoping I hear back from one ASAP.

I have realised I have been loyal to my company for many years, but I am
not getting what I need from them. A few years ago, I would have done anything, but I now realise it's time to put me and my family first.

I can't have DS and DH have a miserable mum and wife.
Ultimately no "job" gets the good me.

I haven't told my boss what I am doing, ultimately it's none of their business and if I'm not successful in any of these roles, I don't want them to make life harder than it is.

I think you need to do what is right for you, and if that's looking for a new job now, then do it!

Good luck, I know how tough this working mummy gig can be.

They do not need to know, apply and if you get the job tell them then. You don't owe them the need to stay as you have just gone back you need to love what you do, well at least like it. All you owe them is tell them in required amount of notice.

Sahbear, you've described it exactly! I was in tears for a lot of today, and it's really just not feeling worth it. I feel like it's turning me into a horrible person when I'm not even there.

Thank you so much everyone, I will apply for the job and not feel guilty about it :)

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Don't tell your current employer! It's none of their business and if they thought you were looking elsewhere they could fire you. Update your resume, write a clear, concise cover letter and apply for the other job. If you get it, then you give notice.

Dont think twice about looking after yourself and your family. If you're miserable, you're better off in another job. It will be better for your current employer to have someone who wants to work there as well. So everyone wins :)

Good luck

It's sucks doesn't it?
I worked from home today, and just logged off, and tomorrow I dont work but will no doubt be called all day.

Keeping my fingers crossed for you!

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Sahbear, you've described it exactly! I was in tears for a lot of today, and it's really just not feeling worth it. I feel like it's turning me into a horrible person when I'm not even there.

Thank you so much everyone, I will apply for the job and not feel guilty about it :)

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:hug: Definately don't feel guilty about making improvements in your life. Your current employer will find someone else. FX you get the job & it is a better fit for you.

One more thing, what do I say to the new place about my current job? Do I tell them they don't know, and so I won't be able to start right away? I've worked for the same organisation since finishing uni so I'm new to this.

As for them getting someone else for my role, I'm not too sure how well they'll go. It's getting pretty well known that this particular position is pretty cruddy.

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They will more than likely ask what notice period you are required to give to your current employer, so they can plan.

All of my interviews it's been asked, and all have been okay with the 4 weeks notice im required to give. Their contracts are the same so they take it into account when they recruit.

Eta, if they don't ask, I would let them know what your notice period is.

It's ok to look for something without telling your current job, everyone does it.

Legally you will probably have to give 4 weeks notice and you can tell the new place this at interview, however if your current job lets you leave earlier then you can start at the new place earlier.

It's not your responsibility to find someone else to do your job if you leave, it's up to them, you don't need to worry about this.

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It's not your responsibility to find someone else to do your job if you leave, it's up to them, you don't need to worry about this.

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Absolutely. Please don't feel any sense of obligation or loyalty to them - it sounds like they are sucking the life out of you.

I totally get the not feeling like you are giving 100% to any part of your life. If I weren't pregnant again, I'd possibly be thinking along the same lines as you... something closer to home, where I can leave work at work, walk out and be done.

The receptionist position sounds like a good opportunity. Go for it :)

I'm feeling quite good now, I've updated my resume and cover letter and reckon they kick butt :)

I'll dig out my contract but I'm pretty sure the notice for leaving is 4 weeks. They've had plenty of people leave before, they'll find someone if I go. Maybe not immediately, but that's not my issue.

I'm quite excited to actually do something about this now. Even if I don't get this job at least I'm out there!

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Kaytee: a few things you might want to consider are
- referees from previous jobs or trustworthy ppl who won't tell in current job(?)
- if u want a break before u start new job just factor that into your notice period/when discussing with new job ppl. (some might like it some don't).

But like the others day don't worry abt feeling guilty. Good luck!


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Don't put referees on your CV. Put down 'Referees available on request'. That way they will only ring if you are through to second round or almost being employed and you won't be surprised by them calling your current work referee.


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Ooh good point about referees, thanks! All my referees are from this organisation, and while I do trust my old bosses things still have a way of getting around!

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What FabFiona said - don't put them on, have them "by request" then when you're asked for them, ask for 24 hours to let them know. You're allowed to be up front with the new organisation. Or let the referees know when you've got an interview. Hopefully they're circumspect.

I've only once told my work I'm looking, and that was because I needed an ongoing position, not a contract any more.

Good luck!

Yeah good idea abt not putting them in. :-)


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I'm heading off to drop it in this morning :) Our email server is a bit stuffed and I don't want to post it. I reckon in person will be good anyway, let them have a gawk at me lol. And maybe they'll have a few q's straight up.

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