Help! Baby hungry but upset/frustrated - what's going on??

Hi all

My DD is four weeks old. Breastfeeding has been going pretty well up until the last 4-5 days, when she started pulling off the breast for most of the day feeds.

She nurses well for about 5-10 minutes and then stops, roots frantically, re-latches, and then either sucks for a few minutes or as she gets more agitated, red-faced and starts crying. Sometimes she kicks her legs against me in frustration.

I thought it might be wind as she gets a bit 'gulpy', so I take her off more to burp (sometimes she refluxes a bit) and then re-attempt. Cycle above repeats but she gets louder. She's clearly still hungry as she constantly mouths my neck and face when she's on my shoulder. Day feeds are taking up to an hour or more and I'm concerned as a) she never seems to finish a feed (I take her off as she gets too worked up, and keep trying with more frequency/trying the other side) and b) it's throwing her naps out so she gets really over-tired.

During the night this only happens occasionally when I change her nappy and she wants to play - otherwise she feeds well, possibly because she's drowsy and relaxed.

Any idea what could be going on? Initially I thought it was reflux, as sometimes she'll arch her back and scream when I sit her up to burp; but then sometimes she's trying to look around and possibly getting either distracted or over-tired, and maybe can't concentrate...? Is my flow too slow? Or is something developmental going on...she's become a lot more alert over the past week and is harder to settle :wall: I really have no idea, it's so frustrating for both of us.

I'll contact the ABA tomorrow but in the meantime - help!

There are a great many possibilities. :) When she comes off after 5-10 minutes, do you offer her the other side? If you're concerned about how much milk she's getting, watch her nappies. The ABA will be able to give you more info and help, too. You can call them right now if you want :)
It's quite possible that it's a developmental thing - at least in part. They change so rapidly and frequently at this age!

Hi Buffy,
I am certainly no expert but I can offer you my experience.

My DD is just over 6weeks and she also frequently pulls off after about 15mins then will reattach then pull off then reattach etc etc with a lot of fussing, she seems like she's still hungry but doesn't want the breast. I have found its an indicator that she is tired. I just persevere with her fussing while we cuddle and rock and usually within 5mins she has settled & is on her way to sleeping.

They are such confusing little cherubs to figure out sometimes aren't they.



Sent from my iPhone... Probably while feeding our poppet.

Hmm my 9 week old does this sometimes and in fact I think she did it a lot at around the 4-5 week mark too. For me I suspect over tiredness and/or some sort of tummy discomfort. Re is she having enough I worry about this too I guess all you can do is keep putting her back on. I hope your nipples are holding up ok.

https://www.breastfeeding.asn.au/bfi...wonder-weeks-0

My little man still does this and I've found it's usually when he is trying to get a poo out lol. Once he has got that out of the way he is happy to go back to feeding. I'm sure if this was the case it would be more obvious but just though I would share my experience

Thanks everyone. I rang the ABA, counsellor said it sounded like a forceful letdown.

This afternoon I tried different positions, skin to skin and snuck in a BF while she was sleepy.

Then tonight I had total breast refusal - screaming, starving baby. It was so upsetting, I cried.

We tried a formula top-up, she drank 40 ml without fuss but just projectile vomited all over DH and is struggling to sleep.

I don't know what to do. She's been gaining weight beautifully until now, no upset tummies etc.

Expressing hasn't gone well, I can barely get 40 ml per session and it hurts.

I'm seeing my GP tomorrow and will try an LC as well.

I feel awful and so sorry for DD :(

As was suggested above, do you offer the other side when this happens? I can't remember exactly what DD was like at that age, but I remember at some point that DD would do this and I eventually worked out that she wanted the other side where (I'm assuming) the milk was more free-flowing.

I hope you get an answer soon!

Thanks chody. Yes, I offer both with the same result unfortunately.

Oh Buffy :( x

I'm sorry that things aren't going well Buffy. I hope things can get sorted quickly for you xxx

What is her nappy output like? Has it decreased?
There are lots of reasons why a 4-week old might be crying or upset, it doesn't necessarily mean it's an issue with feeding - even if it's happening at the breast. She is happy to feed when sleepy? So maybe concentrate on offering when she's just woken up or feeding to sleep. If she doesn't want any more, try something else - cuddles, rocking, or wear her in a sling.

Expressing is not a good guide for your milk supply, if that is what concerns you. It only tells you how good you are at expressing (or how good your pump is). Also, even very well-fed babies will often apparently skull down a bottle of milk - simply because it flows so much faster and easier than the breast. The fact that she power-chucked afterwards may be an indication that she was actually over-full.

Seeing your doctor or an LC is a good idea. Always best to rule out any problems. She could be unwell even, as we head into flu season. If she's been gaining weight and growing well up to now, in all likelihood this is just a little blip and you'll be back on track again very soon. :hug:

Oh Buffy you poor thing:hug:

DD3 has been doing this the last few days. I'm pretty sure it's a combination of wind/reflux but she wants to feed for comfort which actually makes it worse. Sometimes she gets a burp out and settles sometimes it can last for a few hours though :( I remember dd1 going through a similar thing and it did eventually improve. I'm also finding when dd3 is like this offering the slower flowing side or empty side settles her more as she can suck without getting an over full tummy as she won't take a dummy for ucking comfort. We get the back arching screaming red face and scratching hands up to 3 hours on and off then she has a sleep and can wake up like a new baby often after doing a poo.

Sometimes a dream feed before they wake can help as they don't get worked up and gulp the air then get a sore belly

Sounds like going to a gp might be worth while even if it's just for reassurance. If she is not feeding at all then it is important to get her hchecked out poor little Mite. As madb said it may not be related to brestfeeding at all

My DD2 is like this often and has been since birth. In our case, it's because she's finished a feed in that short time (gulping furiously) and my forceful letdown makes it very difficult for her to comfort suck. Most of the time I take her off, make sure she has no wind and then just comfort her in my arms without the bbs until she falls asleep. She wouldn't take a dummy either. DD2 likes to sleep on her tummy and I am now at three months able to settle her in that position for a nap.

When she was littler the only way I could quickly settle her to sleep was to wear her in a sling or wrap. Have you tried that? This still works beautifully for us if I am not at home or frazzled.

If she has plenty of wet and/or dirty nappies maybe she has finished a feed and you might need to find another way to settle her if feeding is having the opposite effect. GL!

Hi,

I'm wondering (with me always more questions than answers at the start) how many feeds does she have in 24 hours? does she tend to have just one breast or both? Just let her come off, have a burp and give her the other side. Try adding in more frequent short feeds, rather than trying to get her to stay on for long periods

Oh lady, I'm sorry W is fussing so much!

I don't have any advice... I wish I did. Just sending you both some love x

Thanks all so much for your suggestions.

She has BF with only minor fussing six times since midnight, finishing feeds herself. Being sleepy must help, this morning was more trouble as she was very alert and worked up. I also took her off after letdown and re-attached, and have been block feeding. I really hope this continues.

MadB, her output is still good. Will keep trying feeds ASAP after she wakes up or maybe dream feed. do you think she's changing her feeding pattern?

Barb, she usually feeds 8-9 times per day. Yesterday only 6 but must have made up for it last night. I was worried that switching sides would mean she wouldn't get the fatty milk? She fusses equally on both. Will keep offering but she gets so angry and distressed when I try to latch her on.

Seeing GP shortly and will go to MCH drop-in later if refusal happens again.

Hi,

yet again more questions...what has her weight gain been like?

buffy, it sounds like she's doing pretty well! You mentioned earlier that the weight gains had been going well, too, right?

One thing I'll add, from personal experience - if she doesn't want to feed, don't push it. just concentrate on the times when she is happy to feed. :hug:

Barb, 250-300 g per week.

MadB, thanks for the reassurance, will try to do just that.

Have a bit of hope that the strike was temporary, DD has been feeding with only minor fuss around the clock today (if anything, she doesn't want to stop). Also very clingy.

GP was very happy with her progress, but due to my PND have been referred to a sleep/feeding school to catch issues early.

Massive!
Obviously I"m not in a position to actually know what's going on with your daughter, but I would seriously consider the possibility that there isn't actually anything 'wrong'. You're both just learning the ropes still.

That's huge weight gain Buffy! You should be so proud.

Great weight gain. I would just assume she's finished feeding when she fusses like that and maybe just wants to comfort suck without the milk. Have u tried a dummy?

Hi again all

Just wanted to thank you again.

Feeding has been much better. I think (with your help, the ABA and getting to know DD's cues a bit better) it was a combo of forceful letdown and over-tired - made for a vicious cycle. She will only use bbs for comfort at night or when already relaxed, otherwise it's the dummy.

I wish these babies (and boobs) came with an instruction manual!

That's great that things are better hun. You are doing really well - but I agree, an instruction manual would make things much easier!

:

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Hi again all

Just wanted to thank you again.

Feeding has been much better. I think (with your help, the ABA and getting to know DD's cues a bit better) it was a combo of forceful letdown and over-tired - made for a vicious cycle. She will only use bbs for comfort at night or when already relaxed, otherwise it's the dummy.

I wish these babies (and boobs) came with an instruction manual!

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Wish I'd seen this thread earlier. As soon as I read it I thought "overtired/overstimulated" My DD was exactly the same at that age, and it happened so easily. We couldn't hand her round for cuddles, and couldn't even hand her between DH and I too often, or this would start happening. It was nothing to do with my boobs or my milk, or her guts, or wind or anything.

What really helped in the end was a lot of babywearing, early in the day. At 8am (as soon as I'd finished breakfast) I would pop her in the sling, and she'd stay in there for 2 hours, hop out for boob, change, little play, more boob, back in for another 2 hours, repeat. That worked so well for us, and her feeds improved out of sight.

Glad things are improving for you :hug:

sounds good!
try and remember this when the next 'thing' crops up - you will figure it out :)