Moving house - before baby or after baby? HELP!

I am 35 weeks pregnant and found out yesterday that we need to move out of the house we have been renting for the last 6 years.

The landlords feel awful as they know I am pregnant but we all dont really have a choice as the house has active termites and has done structural damage to some of the main supporting beams near the back of the house. They need to do major structural repairs and it's just been a nightmare for the last 3 years for the owners. I do really feel for them.

Anyway, it means we have to move out They have said we can move out whenever we like but really by May 1st at the latest so they can begin work.

I am so stressed. We have 2 dogs, an almost 4 year old DD and a baby on the way. There is sooooooo much to pack and clean out, etc and I know it will be difficult to find some where that will accept 2 little dogs even though the landlord said they would give us great references for them.

So I am trying to decide what is best to do. Try and move within the next 5 weeks or wait until free the baby is born?

What would you do?

What/who have you got in terms of support?

Big hugs!

If at all possible, I would do it before the baby came as long as your eldest DD can handle the multiple changes.

Also, I would enlist absolutely everybody I know to help as it is a big job when pregnant.

I would definitely do it ASAP. Ring the real estate agent that you got this rental through and see if they have anything pet friendly available

this is a REALLY really tough one.... really sucks :(. 5 weeks to find a place, pack, unpack, get settled before bubs comes along could be really really cutting it short.. if there was more than 5 weeks i would probably say move.. but i would probably wait a few months

We rent through them privately which I think is going to make things even harder for us. Not sure?

I just can't believe it. Still in shock a day after hearing the news. I had only just finished setting everything up for baby including wall stickers and all. My sister is calling me back after 6pm. She is going to come around this weekend so I might rope her into helping and I know my mum will help. DH is so busy working to bring money in so I know I am going to be the main packer. :(

That's hard, looking for a place is time consuming and stressful at the best of times! If you can afford the expense of a removal company that would my suggestion - get one who comes in & packs everything & then transports to the new house. Good luck!

Not sure if you remember hun, we had a similar thing when DD2 was born (about 3months I think from memory). We waited until she was born. dd1 was in daycare on the day we moved and dd2 was little enough I put the portacot up and/or had her in a carrier while I did what I could to help. Probably would have been easier to do it before she was born buit thats how it happened.

I'm more than happy to come and help you in the evenings when I can.

I would wait so you can save a bit and find a place you like. Moving with a tiny baby is hard, but you just need your mum or an older person to sit and hold baby while you do other stuff. I would also recommend professional packers too.

I would start looking now, but only jump into a pre-baby move if the place is perfect and you can afford professional removalists.

Oh :hug: moving house is so stressful.

I would do it ASAP. I would just want to be all done and settled before baby arrived. Wish I was closer and could help! xx

We moved when DD2 was a week old, wasnt an issue really. Id start packing what you can live without slowly and look then just move when you find something suitable. Having a flexible end date could be a blessing.

Good luck, it must be a huge shock after so long in one place. I hope you find somewhere perfect!

My gut feel would be before as you never know what might come with the birth - you might need a c-section which would put you out of physical action for a while, or you may need a longer stay in hospital etc. I know that sounds paranoid but I guess for me I would consider that there are more unknowns after the birth than before if that makes sense.

What a horrible position to be in - I hope you can find another place easily.

The other thing maybe you could do is ask your landlord (since they are already feeling bad) if they can give you a month rent-free or something so you can take up a lease sooner on a new one and do stuff gradually? Just an idea...

Sorry to hear you have to move :( I'd do it before bubs arrives. Our Dd was hard work and I can't imagine moving during all of that when she was so unsettled and wouldn't sleep. Try to get as much help as you can so that you don't feel stressed. It might be a lot for your 1st child to gain a sibling then move, they might think its the baby that brought about all the change.

That really sux, personally I would try move before bubs but does mean rushing, you'll need find something asap which might not be exactly what you want.

I've moved twice when heavily pregnant and again when DD2 was a few months old. (Hmmm... there's a pattern here! I love this house, maybe no more kids!!) I found moving when pg a lot easier, particularly if you have plenty of support. I suffer SPD when pg so I was pretty useless physically but I could still stand around and boss everyone else! I really enjoyed the nesting and setting up of a new place and it certainly gave me plenty to do in those last few weeks of pg which just seem to crawl by.

Perhaps you could ask your current landlords for some rent relief to put towards the cost of removalists?

Good luck, I hope you find a lovely new home.

Things are just so hard... :(

I am so tired, dragging dd around to look at places that seem good on (website name removed by moderator - please read guidelines) and turn out rubbish. I have started the whole throwing stuff out process when I have energy but I am just so tired.

I had the biggest cry tonight as I took down all the wall stickers and all the nursery stuff that I took so much time placing up for this bub. It just felt so depressing and overwhelming.

I know moving before bub will be easier but right now it all seems hard.

To make matters worse, last night I threw up in the bath and today I threw up in the car while at traffic lights. I grabbed some serviettes from centre console but it wasn't enough, so I cried all the way home with Dd telling me it's ok mummy. Not sure whether it's stress related or morning sickness back.

I have plenty of offers of help from family and friends which is great but it's limited what they can do at the moment.

My mum is coming over tomorrow with about $100 worth of boxes and packing stuff that she is shouting me and is going to come with me to look at places, then my sister is coming over in the Arvo and is going to stay the night and help pack some stuff. I am really lucky to have them.

I just feel so lost, unsettled and in limbo land. I hate it :(

Sorry for the vent. Just needed to get it out. :(

That really sucks. You poor thing, I really feel for you. I'd definitely move before the baby arrives though too. We moved 6 weeks before DD2 arrived and it was really tough but we did it. Mum and I did most of the packing and all our family pitched in on moving day.

I'd avoid moving after the baby is born if you can because firstly, packing with one child to look after is hard enough (I've done it three times with kids, twice with just DD1) and secondly you just don't know what's going to happen with your newborn. DD2 had a tongue tie, annihilated my nipples which lead to an array of feeding issues and 7 weeks of exclusive pumping. She also had reflux. That thrown in with the usual newborn stuff and sleep deprivation, well yeah, moving wouldn't be easy.

Good luck hon. I'm so sorry this has been dumped on you unexpectedly.

Thanks taurean. It is reassuring to hear others have been through similar situations.

Fingers crossed we find something today! Then the next step is to have our application accepted! Arrrhhh! With 2 little dogs it might be difficult but I can't lie about them.

Think positively hon. We have a dog too and got the first house we applied for. Quite remarkable in the current Perth rental market (it's mad over here!). Will be thinking of you!

oh, what a loop you've been thrown, i can understand you feeling overwhelmed, i would be too.

i had to move, when six months pregnant (but no pets, no other sibling), from a great rental property, due to the termites (and the physical reactions i was experiencing due to the chemicals used, each time the landlord treated the termites). It was an awful experience. i had to pack up most of the house, shed, garden etc, by myself. The week before the move, the money i had saved up for removalists, got used up to fix my partner's car, which suddenly needed an expensive repair job. So stressful, trying to move using cars and a few hours of a hire a trailer for bigger items. So many trips, so much lifting.

Was very ill after the arrival of my DD, if we hadn't moved BEFORE she arrived, i wouldn't have been able to move prolly until she was around one. This is obviously an individual thing, you might have an easy labour and be just fine.

If you have a helpful mum, family and friends, USE THEM. Get them to pack up the stuff you are NOT using now. Pretend you are camping, ONLY keep unpacked the stuff you use for day to day. THIS season's clothing, basic dishes and cutlery etc. Get family/friends to start cleaning stuff that gets cleaned rarely (E.g exhaust fans) so that when you DO move, it'll be a much quicker cleaning job.

You may or may not find somewhere to live, within five weeks, so the choice of WHEN you move, may be more dependent on WHEN you find somewhere to live, rather than your choice. So the more you chip away at the decluttering, the packing etc (with family/friends), the less you'll have to do, if you suddenly find a great place, two weeks from now.

Some landlords say "no pets", so i'm guessing, when you find a landlord that does allow pets, you may have to jump on that listing.

Be kind to yourself, relax your expectations. Yes, the new bub's nursery may not be set up when they arrive, but that baby will still be loved and cared for, your family will be together, that's what really matters - the rest is gravy. Your health, the baby's health is the top priority. SO whatever you can do to de-stress - will help.

Let your family/friends know what will help - if you'd rather babysitting (of the 4yo), so that you can pack - tell them.

Accept help and clearly voice what you need to be done. I know it's hard to ask for help, it's hard to accept help too. But i'm guessing your family/friends ask because they care about you.

i lifted and reached and got up ladders ALOT when six months pregnant, i hope you are smarter than me, and utilise the help you are being offered. I had to do a month of bedrest, AFTER i had moved, really regret not having a removalist.

Bending over the large packing boxes (height of tea chest) really was hard on the back too, esp when you have a preg. belly in front.

You make piles or selections of what is to go, let other people pack the boxes, tape them shut, you can LABEL all the boxes, so you can find stuff at the other end, but let other people do the bending etc.

best of luck with finding alternative place hon. Keep some wet wipes in the car, a towel, a water spray bottle.

people do throw up, due to anxiety - moving house is a major anxiety, let alone, in this situation.

best of luck hon.

We had no choice when I was pregnant with DS2. He was 8 wks when we moved & from the day I brought him home I was packing. I believe because of this we didn't have the best bond. I tried making him be the baby who just fitted in (the one everyone talks about) & he was so not. I found it all very stressful ended up at sleep school at 4 months etc because I just couldn't understand him. This could have occurred anyway but do wonder. If I had the choice again I would move before regardless of how big, late in my pregnancy so that when bub was born I could have the baby moon period.
Good luck finding a place it is a very stressful situation your in.

As most have said, move before bub comes. I moved interstate very late in my pregnancy, whilst it was hard, I'm so glad I did. Moving in pregnancy is hard at any stage, but moving once bubs arrives, I think, would be so much more stressful

GL on what ever way you go xx

Just wanted to check in and let you know after 2 weeks of searching and looking at open homes, we had an application accepted yesterday for a new house. It is really nice, although its about $120 more than what we are paying now per week but it will be nice to be in a fresh place. I have been packing like mad the last 2 weeks andthrowing things out left right and centre

We get the keys for the new place on Saturday. I will take us a week to move I think.

The other good news is I finished work today so now will have more time to pack.

Fingers crossed the move goes well and we get the bond back from this place. I am not sure how termination of lease works when you rent privately and how I get bond back wtc. It was lodged properly through the bond board.

Awesome!! It will be so good to be in a new place all fresh and ready for the baby!!

Oh that's wonderful news! Congratulations and enjoy your new abode!

congrats, fingers crossed for moving day, hope you get your bond back in time (to pay the bond at the new place i'm guessing).

what a relief, you know where you're going to now.

Well we have mostly moved house now. We started on the weekend. Most of the stuff is moved but not all of it. :(

DH is being a nightmare. Ok I get he has had to work 6am till 6pm shifts with an hour travel each way mon to thurs. this week but if he had have been more organized for the weekend it could have all been moved.

I have cleaned what I can at the old house but there is still stuff in the laundry and lounge room. The garage. Is still full and the trampoline still needs to be dissembled and taken moved.

I have organised a council cleanup for next Friday morning (couldn't get it any sooner) so all the rubbish, unwanted furiture etc will need to be moved out to the street. DH will need to do this. Physically I can't do it.

I have already pushed my body and mind to much. I am an emotional and physical wreck although i can't Imagine doing This with a newborn so glad we have done it before the baby.

I don't even know if I will get the bond back for the old place at the rate DH is moving. After next week,I am not going back to the old house to do stuff. I have to draw a line. I struggle just going to the shops to get milk as I am physically spent :( how am i going to get through labour and childbirth? Just want to cry :(

I just can't stand how disorganized DH is about the move. He seriously needs to get his act together and move the rest of the stuff before I lose the plot and have a complete breakdown.

:hug: That must be so stressful for you. Why have I not seen this thread before today?? We will be doing the exact same thing in 2 months time and I will be 30 weeks pregnant. I am not looking forward to it at all :( I hope you get everything sorted and get your bond back..

Can dh get a couple of days off work to go hard and just get it done?

Oh Ali :( Can you have a mini meltdown now? Scare him into helping a bit more? Does he realise how stressed you are?

Oh :hug: Tell him you're done and he can organise the rest. That's enough, you need to rest now xx

Thanks girls :grouphug:

I finished setting up the baby's room yesterday. That was a nice feeling.

I am going to vacuum and mop what I can of the old house tomorrow and then that is it. He is doing the rest. He can ring the landlords and take over all communication. I am so over it.