Printable View
We are about to host a 5year old birthday party. What is the protocol for opening presents?! Does the birthday child open them on arrival? Do they put the on a table and open them in front of everyone later? Do they put them on a table and open them once the guests have left?
At DS1's 5th birthday last year (the first we've had with school friends) we let him open them as the guests arrived.
I don't think there's really any ettiquette involved at that age :)
I think it is rude to wait because the giver (particularly if they are little kids themselves) love seeing the joy their gift has brought.
So far we have managed to keep them for opening later, it's been easy enough with them both being so young. Moo is going to be 4 next birthday so not sure if he'll be able to wait!
Some parties I go to they open right away while others wait like we have done. I only wait as I'd hate for anything to go missing when he's only just received it, plus I like to write down who gives what for thankyou messages etc.
Yep I reckon it was DD's last birthday (4) that was let her open them then and there. More fun for all involved. Especially when you have excitable younger gift givers saying things like "it's a car!!!!!!," before birthday child even has a chance!
We usully open them after cutting the cake. All the kiddies help out with dd's permission of course.
I let my girls open then as they get them. That way you they can say thank you straight away to the person and it be a proper thank you in stead of just a nos/smile sort of thing when everyone stands around watching you open them. Plus, the last couple of birthdays my eldest has gone to the presents have been put on a table and left for later. DD has asked before we have left if I could ask (host) to let (child) open so she can watch them. The giver can enjoy a present just as much as the one getting it.
I think it's wrong to give a gift if you're only doing it to see the birthday person open it and see their face.
When/if my kids have birthday parties, they won't be opening them in front of guests.
Can I ask why you think it's wrong?? Why wouldn't you want to see the joy on their face??:
We always wait til guests have gone and the kids are a little calmer otherwise they don't stop and look what they have received, but rather rip and move into the next present
It is wrong to give a present only to see the reaction it brings. Who would do that???
I think it's bad manners (according to me) not to share the authentic and immediate joy a gift has brought you. I don't understand why you would want to deprive the gift giver of that :dunno: Unless you are worried about your/your child's reaction to the gift????
My DD has never ripped into any gift and has always given each gift thoughtful consideration and appreciation because that's how she was raised.
We usually put on a table, and open in a group after the cake. Kids love seeing the parcel they brought being opened, and it gives the giftee the chance to thank the giver immediately.
But I'm aware that this is a very culture-specific practice. In some other countries it is considered the height of rudeness to open a gift while the guests are there, and elsewhere it's highly rude not to open it on the spot. I think we just all need to be aware in this big melting pot of a country that there are many ways of doing things, and many different ways of being polite.
W have opened afterguests have left.
If I let DS open them while the guests were there, he would want to play with certain things and not engage in the party.
DD1 went to a 6th bday party on the weekend. There was a gift table and presents were not opened at all.
There were 20 5/6 year old there, TBH I would think it huge waste of time to try and open 20 presents and keep 20 5/6 year olds still and interested through the process, in a 2 hour party.
I would/was not offended - nor was DD - that our gift was not opened in front of us.
I let DS1 open presents as he received them. I never got the whole "present table" it always seemed a bit egocentric to me. Nine times out of 10 the kids wanted to play with the toys anyway. I did though, try to notice what he got so I could write on the back of the cards so he could do thank you cards to everyone.
I think there was a thread on this no so long ago..
But I let mine open as they receive, and if they happen to miss one due to receiving more than one at once, they normally open before the guests leave.. at the parties amongst our friends, I find most kids are asking the birthday child to open their present sometime throughout the party..
At DD's party on the weekend she opened her presents after the cake with all her friends sitting down sharing the joy with her. It was just gorgeous to watch.
I don't mind them opening whenever, but I do like to see kids open presents while we're there. I like to see if they like what we got them :lol:
5yo party a few weeks ago & we were late arrivals, so present was forgotten. But I was texted a photo the next day to show me she loved it :)
I think presents are to be opened, kids are taught to be thankful but get very excited so some they open when kids give it to them, some are opened later in the party. This weekend DD has her party with 5 little friends and I think she could just open them whenever!!
But part of the joy of giving is the pleasure of seeing how much the person you've chosen the gift for, loves it. It seems a rather selfish (to me) idea to not allow the giver pleasure of giving and also to encourage the person receiving the gift to thank the person for it.:
l ask for no presents, but I think it depends on size of party and age of recepient. I have not been to a party yet where gifts are opened but oldest party is 4 So I think that is part of it. A large number of gifts l think is better use of party time to party and not wade through opening. If I went to a 10 year olds party with only 4 guests say l might find it odd not to open.
I like giving presents more than receiving them! I love seeing the joy on someone's face when they open them and I like to put a lot of thought into gifts that I give.
I think it's nice to open them as you receive them when you are a child. I don't like kids presents being opened in a group incase a child feels sad that they may have given a smaller gift.
After cake and eating, so kids are less likely to be restless. Doing it that way means that everyone can see the joy and excitement, and it makes it much easier to write a list of who gave what, so that the birthday child can write thank you notes :)
Some of the comments here are a bit harsh. At the end of the day does it really matter?
There are lots of reasons for and against opening during the party v opening later. I don't think any mother thinks 'oh, let's see how rude I can be by not having the presents opened during the party'.
I opened DS's at home afterwards, for several reasons - including reasons to make my guests more comfortable:
I knew there would be a variation in the amounts spent on presents. I couldn't care less about that but did not want the parents who had spent less to feel uncomfortable.
I didn't want to embarrass anyone who brought the same gift as someone else (which did actually happen).
I hate a roomful of people watching me while I open presents.
People who want to see the joy of a child opening their present must never have given a present to a child they didn't like! Yes, yes, all children need to be taught to gracefully receive presents, but that's a skill learnt with age. ;)
Surprised - when i was young mum couldnt afford presents for other kids parties so mine was the cheapest crappiest there was. I hated present opening time and was always embarrassed when it was time
Mum2SweetCs... Hugs. You were probably the only one who cared (in that no-one was judging you and the kids didn't have a clue)... But it's a horrible feeling.
we don't open at party we come home and open and I take a pic of my child with pressie and tag the mum on FB if we are friends or send them a pic wth thank you.. I am a bit fanatical and can't stand the tear presents open and not know who it was from business but that's me