Jake Thomas Long my tiny tiny baby (sorry if tmi) very long story

It was my birthday and i was 22 weeks 6 days - it was late at night when i threw up - didnt think much of it and went to bed. little did i relize it was the begining of a hard 2 weeks. the next day (23 weeks) i was really sick. a virus had been going around town and i through i had picked it up. by 7pm i could not even keep water down and i had bad chest pain. i went to hospital where i was put on a drip given a pink lady (milanta and anastetic) and some maxalon and eventually sent home. i was bearly eatting through the week and my DS came down sick that thursday so was looking after us both. DH (had been made redundent 2 weeks earlier) had been offered 1 weeks worth of work starting saturday through to the following sunday leaving home at 6.30 and getting back 21.30.......friday night i ended up in hospital again..they were so busy it took 2 hours to be seen and i just agreed to the pink lady so i could go home. saturday morning i went to the chemist to try some zantac for the chest pain. he refused to sell me any until i had seen a doctor (i will be thanking him the next time i see him). so off i went to the doctor and was seen straight away. my doctor advised me it was reflux (which i knew it wasnt but just wanted some releaif from the chest pain) she wrote me lettle to take to the hospital with me if i went again and ordered blood tests. went back to the chemist and was given zantac.
On sunday i decided to call my inlaws to help look after DS (whos 7) as i was still not well. was alternating between zantac and panadole every 6 hours. they agreed to come down to help out. Monday i went to pathology and had my bloods taken. monday afternoon my father inlaw arrived and i even ate a little bit of dinner - well that was a mistake up it came and with in 1 hour i was in hospital with chest pain. gave the staff my letter and was again treated for GORD. but this time i was admited. spent the whole night in pain was given milanta milk and ice.
tuesday - 24 weeks - spent the day in hospital OB stopped by to check on me and i advised him of the blood tests...was upset i had not had them done at hospital as they would now have to chase them. at 14.30 was advised the results had come back in and they wanted to transport me to a larger hospital...got husband to bring son straight in so i could say goodbye. hubby was sent home to pack a bag for me was not told much (or maybe i dont remember it) was put on the trolly and wheeled out. told them hubby was coming with a bag for me and could they wait and was advised no - had to be moved asap...hubby got there just as they loaded me into the ambulance. i waved goodbye thinking i would see them the next day.
18.00 arrived at the hospital and was taken to delivery suite and had doctors nurses midwives and NICU leader arrive to talk to me - they advised me they needed to remove my son tonight and they were prepairing a theater. i was shocked they explained i had liver problems and hemagolbin problems and that removing my baby was the only way to stop it. i rang DH and told him to come straight down that they were taking my baby. it was a long hour later that they came back in and advised me i had stablized and that they would keep him inside of me if i didnt get worse. hubby made it to me and we both breathed a sigh of releif. the next day i was taken to fetal monitoring and given an ultra sound. My son was mesuring 2 weeks behind...had a hole in his heart....and that my placenta was under strain...he was also mesuring 480grams i was told because he was under 500grams if he was to be born there was a change he would not make it. i was moved to antinatal and had bloods taken every 6 hours and monitored every 4 hours. they said it looked like i had HELLP syndrome but with my BP being normal i was ok if my bloods didnt get worse. In fact by friday i had packed up my bags and was waiting on a discharge letter when i was advised i was not to be leaving. my bloods had crashed again. the chest pains returned (turned out it was pain from my liver) and i was back on the pain relief.
Monday - 24 weeks 6 days - sitting in the tea room with all the other long time antinatal paitents we are talking about why each of us were there how long etc when my inlaws came by to visit (didnt know at this point my BP had started to go up) - we went back to my room and had a chat - wasnt feeling sick was in every scence fine walking comunicating everything when all the doctors poured into my room - it was bad....11.30....we are going to have to remove your baby at 14.30 you will need a platlet transfusion before you go in. you will be under general anastetic as a epidural could cause a blood clot. i called my husband straight away and told him to move as he had to pick up our son on the way and it would take 2 hours to get to me. i was moved to delivery and blood transfusion started. hubby gets to me 10 minutes before they take me away. hubby leans over me and i whisper to him "if i dont make it make sure DS knows i love him and that i am sorry" hubby says not to stress but he had missed all the talks so i dont think he relised how serious it was. DH and MIL walk with me to surgury and they wait for our son. i am wheeled into the operating room and prepaired i think its about 14.30-15.00 and i have a mask put over my face and asked to breath. i can breath in but cant breath out and start to stuggle - they do an ajustment and i can breath. they want me awake until the last moment so baby doesnt get to much anastetic. at last i was told to take 3 deep breaths and i smell something horrible before i fall asleep.
i wake to a huge pain i dont know if i wake straight away or drop in and out but i eventually wake long enough for them to move me to my own room in delivery at 20.00 (was told it would only take 2 hours - dont know what happened for 4 hours) hubby advised me jake made it 520grams and is fighting strong. i see a picture of him on DH phone and am told i will see him the next day. i have a midwife in with me for the whole night monitoring me. DH sleeps on the bed next to me as i doze in and out
Wed - i see jake for the first time he is so tiny and so perfect. i get to see him a second time i cant believe his so tiny. i am moved out of my single room and into a double (still in delivery). hubby cant stay with me and my room mate is very rude. the next day my room mate is tranfered and i am left to myself - my cathada is supost to be reoved as well as my drain but it takes upto an hour for anyone to see me when i buzz for help. DH and my friend get very angry and we again request to be moved (am told there is no room in post natal or antinatal for me and i later find out i am in the delivery exam room) i eventually have it all removed and i walk to NICU to see my son. I spend another night by myself and end up seeing a social worker the next day to try and get me moved again told there is no room. i am sore and tired and very angry i agree to be discharged and am moved to Ronald Mcdonald house i know i still should be in hospital but it was a night mare i needed to escape. I apparently had a very rare form of HELLP syndrome. i still have to have a blood test to be given the all clear which i hope to get this week my son Jake Thomas was born 24 weeks 6 days weight 520grams. his a fighter and has been doing well even gaining 19 grams from birth weight within 3 days. he takes 1ml of ebm every 4 hours and i know in 15 weeks i will be taking him home

Thank you for sharing your story. Love and strength to you and your baby boy. Hope you have a smooth NICU journey as you both get stronger and healthier.

OMG I have tears streaming down my face, so glad you & your strong little boy are both fighters & both going to be ok. You sound like you handled yourself so well, you are a very brave lady. Best wishes to yourself, your DH & both your DS's xoxo

Hugs! Thanks for your story. Sounds like you did wonderfully. Best wishes to you all

Wow Hun it seems more real when put in writing like that. We are here to support you xxx

Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful boy!
Thank you for sharing your story.
I hope your recovery is quick and your little man goes from strength to strength with minimal set backs.

Thankyou for sharing hun. I wish you a speedy recovery and your DS loads of strength and love.

Thank you for sharing your story hugs and good health wishes for you both xx

What a strong little man you have, congratulations!

Reading the whole story just makes you realise how scary that would have been... Grow big and strong darling Jake xx

You are such a strong Mumma and I thank you for sharing your journey with us. Look forward to continuing to support you through the good and the tough moments xx

Congratulations on the birth of your tiny son, Jake. I hope his NICU journey is short and smooth.

Just saw this! Good on you for being so strong. I hope little jake keeps growing in leaps and bounds.

Stay strong hun

You are a strong mama. Congratulations to you and little fighter Jake. I hope the next 15 weeks and beyond are healthy and full of healing.

What a story! Thanks for sharing. I hope Jake continues to improve and that you recover quickly also. *Hugs*

Your little man must be a fighter. I hope you are recovering well and are being supported by everyone. What a scary arrival into the world.

Wow, thankyou for sharing your story, I had a little tear when you told your hubby to tell your son you are sorry etc =(. How is your little man now?

His fighting but unfortunently we have been told we may have to switch of support. I am at a loss as this will be my last child and one we have tried so hard for. But we have to do what's best for him now

Oh hon xx I have everything crossed for you that he manages to keep fighting. I hope you're continuing to heal and recover too.

What an incredibly difficult choice to have. Sending good thoughts to you and your little boy. xx

Oh no :( Praying for you and little Jake.

Praying for you huni. All our love to you and precious Jake xxxx

I'm sorry to hear this.

I can't imagine having to make that decision let alone dealing with the emotion that goes with it. Hoping a miracle comes your way.

Thinking of you & your family xxx

Very sorry to hear this. Thinking of you and your family!

thinking of you. xxx

Hi Plagued. I have been through this with my twins born at 24wks then with my 25weeker. I was lucky with my 25 weeker, but with my twins I had to make the hardest decsion of my life. Please feel free to message me or click on the links in my sig if you want to read my story.

Sending strength to Baby Jake. I hope you have lots of support. Go very gentle Mama. xx

Hi Plagued,

I've been thinking about you and your precious Jake. Please don't hesitate to contact me if you need support. I have been through the nicu journey with my earthside bub (for 5 months) as well as having to say goodbye to 2 of my sweet angels. Stay strong mama.

Blessedatlast have tried to pm you but your inbox is full

Plagued I have deleted some messages, you should be ok now. Hope your ok xx

Jake Passed away in my arms 3rd Feb 2014. they said his lungs gave out that there was nothing more they could do. I have since discovered i had a typical hellp syndrome class one.
I will always miss you Jake - you brought so much love and joy into my life in the short 11 weeks we spent together.
Your song Jake - P!nks - Run
One of this time I swear I’m not wasting
All your smile I’m always gonna save it
You’re in the back of my mind,
Whenever I’ma away from you
One of this time I swear I’m not wasting
All your smile I’m always gonna save it
You’re in the back of my mind,
Whenever I’ma away from you

huge :hug: Plagued

I'm so sorry for your loss

Congratulations on the birth of your baby boy, sending loads of strength and love.

Regards,
Dianne

Congratulations on the birth of your little boy and so sorry that he couldn't stay. RIP little Jake. :hug:

Congratulations on the birth of your little Jake. I'm so sorry he couldn't stay earthside with you :hug:

Im so sorry he couldnt stay Plagued.

Im sorry he couldnt stay.

Many hugs. Much love and support coming your way.