DD touching herself

My DD is 22 m.o and she has started the habit of sticking her hand down the front of her nappy and sticking a finger 'down there'. I know that its normal for little boys to play with themselves but girls?? She sometimes does it when im changing her nappy too. She doesn't stick her finger in her vagina she just grabs near the top near where the clitoris area is. Is this normal or should i be worried?? When she does it i tell her to get her hand out or it move her hand. Should i be doing this or should i just ignore her?

Tehya still does it. I think it's one of her favorite toys. She rarely has pants on though so maybe that's why she plays with it alot. Why should a little girl be any diff to a little boy, just because their bits aren't the same.

Just leave her be, unless she has a dirty nappy on. I wouldn;t go cranky on her, that just brings more attention to it. It will pass, eventually, she is female afterall. It's the boys that never stop playing with it ;)

This doesn't answer the OP, but thought I'd just say - the MCHN actually checked to see if DS reached down to touch his bits when we took his nappy off! implying that if he didn't there was something wrong! LOL.

When my DD used to do it, I'd just divert her attention to something else without making a fuss. She eventually grew out of it!

Kimberley used to do this so much and it drove me crazy but now when i see her doing it i ask if she is sore and when she says no i say leave it alone then.

I wouldn't be worried about it i was to start with but now i know it's what most children will do at some stage.

Since DD has been TT, about 5 months ago, we often see her sitting with her hand in her knickers.. i find its normally when she is tired and resting on the lounge.. we have decided not to tell her to stop doing it, as it does only happen when she is very tired..

Mackenzie will be 3 in June and has started the same thing. It seems to be more when she has no knickers on or I noticed when we were on holidays when she was swimming (maybe the swimmers were annoying her in the pool?). It drives my DH nutty but I just tell him not to worry about it. She seems to touch and then sniff which is grose but I'm not too worried about it - I'm sure she will stop soon. (heres hoping anyway)

I have my Mum old Mothering book from the fifties. It is so funny and it says "if when bathing your child they touch areas not appropriate for public behaviour, do not scold them, mearly turn your back and polish the taps!". It also says you should always be dressed, wearing makeup ans shoes when DH comes home though LOL!!!

what a classic Rachel!

i dont know from experience - but i would think that to them, its just another body part, and if you make a deal over it, they wont understand why, but, they will just realise that some sort of fuss is made - and it might encourage them more. Just my opinion.
Perhaps like has been said, try the distraction method.

i guess the best way to deal with it is to ignore it and not make a fuss... lmao at the comment of boys never growing out of it. It's SO true :) thanks for the advice ladies, at least i know now that its normal for toddlers to 'explore'

i must say gals i am slightly offended by the discriminatory remarks about boys touching themselves. all children touch all parts of their bodys and it is normal and natural. it is like them poking at their eyes or ears or exploring their fingers. boys do not touch themselves more or any less than girls except, i guess, if society sees it as a 'not nice' thing for a girl to do. all of my boys have explored their penis' and as they got older i told them it was ok to do but in private. i never see my older two boys touching their penis' in public so hence they 'grew out of it'? or is it just like the girls they only do it in private?
beckles

It's all normal. If dd is a bit red down there, I get her to help put cream on the areas she's red. I'mm assuming this gives her the idea she needs to look after herself. Likewise with TT, I get her to wipe but I mimick what she needs to do. When she puts her hands there during nappy change I just tell her "that's where you wee from", and the same if she's venturing toward her bottom, I'll tell her "that's where you poo from". Boys pull and poke because their bits get very uncomfortable being cooped up all the time. Ever enquired with your male partners? They'll probably tell you their bits get sweaty, cramped and do need airing. Boys also pull and poke because it's an extra appendage, like anything else that sticks out... fingers, nose, ears, arms, hands, feet... etc. Slapping their hand away for a boy or a girl will only bring about the feeling their is something wrong and it's taboo and dirty. That could lead to problems in adulthood. There simply is nothing taboo or dirty about one's own body. It's the vehicle that gets us all through our own path in life and is to be treated as best and kept in as best condition as we possibly can.

Gem is 18 months and as soon as we get her nappy off she does it! Shes fasinated by it and by our bits too!LOL Corey had a shower with her one night and while he was washing his hair she grabbed his willy!LOL boy did he get a fright!

i guess we are all different, some people get offended by sexism and some don't. saying boys never grow out of touching themselves, i believe is sexist and raising 3 sons i have an opinion on this. are we saying, as women, we never touch ourselves? i think i am intitled to my feelings don't you think?
beckles

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Slapping their hand away for a boy or a girl will only bring about the feeling their is something wrong and it's taboo and dirty. That could lead to problems in adulthood. There simply is nothing taboo or dirty about one's own body. It's the vehicle that gets us all through our own path in life and is to be treated as best and kept in as best condition as we possibly can.

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Thats what i wanted to say to - just couldnt get the words out. I grew up in abit of a taboo household, and i believe that it has affected me as an adult.

or maybe women just lie about it?
beckles

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This doesn't answer the OP, but thought I'd just say - the MCHN actually checked to see if DS reached down to touch his bits when we took his nappy off! implying that if he didn't there was something wrong! LOL.

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geez thats strange!!MCHN's are so amusing. glad he passed their test and they didnt find it as a reason to stress you out!:cryinglaugh:

okay cant edit my post but to the OP - its totally normal for both boy s and g i rls to explore their bodies. ignore it. as they get older you tell them its not socially accepted in public and ask them to go to do it someplace private.

Like everyone has already said...its a perfectly natural thing for both boys and girls to do..nothing wrong with it ..perfectly ok.

Jo

Beckles, I too am a mother to 3 boys and a sister to 3 brothers. I come from plenty of boys. Fact is boys play with their penis's, girl's play with their vagina's. The were no comments that were meant to be taken in a sexist way. My comments were said in a humerous way.

Soon enough when your boys reach teenage years you will find that their hand will end up on their bits once again. I guess teenage girls are abit more discreet about touching their vagina's. Boy's like to brag about it.

At the end of the day, in response to the OP, children of both sexes touch their bodies, whether it's their hair, ear's, nose, leg, penis or vagina. To them it's one of the same parts of their bodies. They know nothing wrong with it. You wouldn't tell them no for touching their toes so why their "bits". Of course once they start to get older I go along the lines of telling them that they shoudn't do that in front of people. It's a private thing.

okayyyyy glad you weren't meaning to be sexist. i have 6 brothers myself so have had my fill of brothers around me.... when my boys are 'teenagers', ummm i hope they are like my brothers and don't do it in public!

beckles

LMAO Brooke, hey the way I see it, DP can play with his all he want's as long as he is leavingme alone I don't care what he does with it. Well, within reason of course.

Beckles, glad to see that you understand my comments :)

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But boys well men / both its a well know fact that men do *touch* their bits more than girls/women.

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Yes... that's because their bits are dangling between their legs and require a bit of adjustment.

And as for women not admitting to *touching* themselves... I ask how do these women handle their monthly's if they don't touch there? Has any woman had to deal with heat rash (men do a lot!).

On a lighter note, I've read somewhere some women even shampoo and condition their especially if going on a date. They claim it makes the pubes nice and soft rather than coarse and wirey. lol.

Sorry to deviate from the original topic.

Brooke, lmao. My DH is the same.

Nothing sexist here. I agree that a lot of men masturbate more than women.

Kirsty - hilarious
DD saw DP get out the shower the other day, pointed and laughed. Since then she keeps trying to look up his shorts! I think he got a bit of a complex from her laughing at him because now he shuts the bathroom door when he has a shower. lol

'ALL' children regardless of sex go through a phallic stage, it is the next developmental stage after having to put everything in their mouths. Believe me, we all did it! It is self exploration, how do they learn what is what if they aren't allowed to explore it.

You are doing the right thing, don't make a big deal about it and definately dont make your children feel naughty for doing it. When they are old enough to understand you can then teach them about what is acceptable in public but until then go with the flow.