First (Unplanned) Preg and scared out of wits!!!

Hi All,

I have just joined the site and this is my first post...

To tell my story..... Have been on contraceptive pill for last 4 years (roughly), no missed pills, missed two periods and went to Dr because I thought something was up with the dose of pill (that has happended to me before) and I wasn't really concerned.

The Dr said have to do pregnancy test just to eliminate pregnancy...was happy to go along with it, b/c I thought of course I couldn't be pregnant. Dr said she would call me with the result.

Next day..(Wednesday last week) Dr called and told me I am pregnant...nearly fell off my chair. :doh:

Long story short - told my partner - both of us freaked out completely - went back to see Dr - had to go for ultrasound to determine how far along - thought about 8 weeks given two missed periods - NO, WRONG - 12 weeks pregnant. Couldn't believe it!!!

Needed to decide what to do by this week (ie keep or terminate). Fainted in supermarket yesterday, rushed to hospital by ambulance, saw baby on ultrasound screen, with healthy heartbeat (they said) and here I am....keeping my baby.

I am so scared of this. Of knowing whether or not I am making the right decision. But I can't shake the picture of the baby, that made it so real to me.

Dear All...please help calm my nerves:pray:

Aww.. Baby Pike, sometimes the unplanned ones turn out to be the best surprises!

You have come to the right place anyhow, as everyone is so supportive here and always offering good advice! Welcome and have a happy and healthy pregnancy! ;)

Thanks Catherine,

I am getting excited about it now. And Partner is extremely supportive.

Now I am just worried about the baby. I haven't taken any Folic Acid and I was on the Pill until last week.

The Folic Acid pack says it should be taken a month before pregnany and best effective up to 12 weeks of pregnancy - i've missed all those timelines! Do you think that will be a problem?

Also I haven't taken any other vitamins.

First baby (on my side) in the family - and I know my famly are going to be over the moon!!! :D

oh honey first of all CONGRATULATIONS!!

it is all so fresh, new and unexpected for you. we had a similar experience with my first pregnancy. i hadnt been regular with periods for a long time and went to the dr after just 1 day of heavy painful bleeding. he did a preg test and it was ++++ next he said it was probably eptoptic and sent me for scan. i was 12 weeks and 3 days preggers!!! DH and i werent married, going through a bad patch and i was working two jobs to pay rent and car loan. i didnt know what i was going to do until i saw a little hand waving at me on the ultrasound screen. unfortunately bubs arrived too early, but he brought DH and me back together and we now have a beautiful family and excellant relationship. i know im waffling on, but you are doing a wonderful thing.. you will obviously be a loving mum as you have made all the right moves with your health and you are already protective of the little image and heartbeat. dont worry, you have another 28 weeks to get used to the idea! you will find plenty of support here at BB and best wishes from me!!!!

oh and the fainting may be lack of iron. try taking elevit or blackmores pregnancy vitamins.. sometimes if you have eaten plenty of healthy cereals etc, they contain a lot of Folate anyway.

Everyone one of my bubs was unplanned. It took us both by surprise, and I can understand how you are feeling. Congratulations on already making it to 12 weeks. Do you realise your almost in the second trimester already!

As far as pregnancy vitamins / folic acid goes just start taking them now, and really begin to get your head around the hole thing....

Thats why I think pregnancy is 9 months. Its to prepare you for what's to come....CONGRATULATIONS!!

JAC

BabyPike - you must be VERY fertile then!!! CONGRATS!!!!!!!! How exciting!!!!
I'm glad your partner is very supportive :) it would be scary going throught his on your own.
You have come to the right place for support and advice!
With the folic acid tablets, i believe they are most effective in the first 3mths of the foetus development (1-12weeks) however if you took them now it would still help i think. you need to talk to the doc about that straight away. if i were you, i would start taking Blackmores "Pregnancy & Breastfeeding Gold" tablets. you can get them from chemists and woolworths.
All the very best for a safe and healthy pregnancy :)
It was meant to be... XX

Hi Baby Pike,

Congratulations!!

You are not alone in feeling freaked out: for many people this is a normal reaction to a life changing event. I was freaked out and our pregnancy was very planned! It is a huge adjustment to come to terms with.

There's often not really a "right" or "wrong" decision: sometimes all you can do is what you feel is best, and others have to respect this regardless of which choice you make. The choice is ultimately yours and yours alone. You need to allow yourself to have confidence in your choice (regardless of which choice): you will have made it for a reason. Focus on the reason and there's why it's best for you. Trust yourself: you are your own best friend, not your own enemy.

As you posted that you have decided to go ahead, here are a few thoughts which I hope might put a smile on your face:
- You're 12 weeks, so have probably bypassed all that hideous 1st trimester discomfort, esp morning sickness! Yay - really a reason to celebrate! (Man am I jealous)
- You have a loving partner: a readymade start for a family!
- This baby will be the most wonderful surprise you and you partner have ever had!
- YOU JUST SAW YOUR BABY ON ULTRASOUND!! What a blast!
- This site is full of non-judgemental people who will respect the decisions you make. welcome!

Also when you are ready, think about joining a BellyBuddies group on this site, where you can chat to people due around the same time as you.

Good luck (and congratulations again!)

xxxx

PS: When I started typing I thought I was the first to post - l;ook how many people have rushed in to support you in the meantime!

oh yeah - it won't hurt to start taking folic acid JIC. Remember that PLENTY of people have surprises and still drink, take the pill, don't take folic acid, etc etc in the meantime, and still give birth to healthy babies. You can always start taking care now.
You might want to start thinking about antenatal care options - talk to your GP? plus what sort of environment you would feel most comfortable giving birth in. (When you have a spare minute for anything else, of course!)

Baby Pike, I just wanted to say congratulations and ((hugs)). What an amazing time this is for you.

Please don't worry about the folic acid thing, just make sure you eat right from now on and take a good preggy vitamin like Blackmores Pregnancy & Breastfeeding Gold.

I can understand you're a bit scared and freaked out (!) but hey, I'm a bit scared and freaked out and this is my second child (LOL = Laugh out loud)!! :) You have come to the right place for information and support, no matter what decisions you might make from here on in!

The very best of luck, and hoping you have a healthy and happy Pregnancy!

Baby Pike - i agree with Sonya, Elevit is great, and it contains folic acid, iron and everything else that bubby will need! Lucky duck you are i think - you musn't have experienced any morning sickness or any yucky symptoms! Just think - your already a quarter of a way there... Definately start getting excited - you didn't even have to go through the worry of whether or not you'll make through the first trimester because your already there!!

I'm so glad to hear you have a great partner to support you.. what else could you possibly need! ;)

I am a blubbering mess - and there have only been a few replies!!

Its nice to know I can come here to chat. Queenie you reminded me - I saw my baby!!!

He was moving his legs in and out - and Drs said he was moving around so much it was hard to catch him on the ultrasound.....just like my partner!!!

(I have been referring to it has "him"...I just have a feeling!)

Has your dr advised you of anything they would like to test for or talk to you about any effects the pill/ lack of folic acid may do?

What pill were you on if you'd like to share? I think some can have a higher risk than others of causing problems.

If you decide to terminate, which it sounds like you've decided to keep it? Then there are a lot of support here and a private thread you can apply to talk in to other people who have made the same choice, if not there are many people and many threads full of lots of wonderful supportive people who will be happy to answer any question you have no matter how silly you think it may sound :)

Many woman had many babies before we knew the benefits of folic acid, baby gets what baby needs from mum, its just important mum keeps up those multivitamin levels for her own sake. If baby wants calcium and you dont have enough it will get taken from your bones etc.

Best of luck with everything and hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy. If you are finding it hard to cope talk to your dr they can send you and your partner (if wanted) to a counsellor specialising with coping with pregnancy and the life changes that are going to happen etc, just a thought.

Take care and keep well,

Love, hugs and belly rubs :)

Celtic

That's just like what happened to me with my first. Very unplanned and i was only 17. Thought i was about 9 weeks but no i was 13 weeks. Decided to keep her and have never looked back since. She's the best thing that has ever happened to me.

I wish you all the very best and congratulations!

Hi Baby Pike,

Congratulations & WELCOME!! As some of the others have said, it can be overwhelming & scary, even when pregnancies are planned!!

If you're worried about the folate thing, it would be a good idea to chat with your doctor & put your mind at ease (and, yes, start taking a pregnancy supplement with folate). The thing to remember is that folate is to prevent neural tube defects - but the incidence of these is not that high (particularly without genetic history of such defects). So, more than likely, your bub will be fine, even though you haven't taken the folate yet.

First of all, Congratulations Baby Pike :)

I understand how you are feeling at the moment. I had a similar experience. My pregnancy wasn't planned either. I actually never ever wanted children, and I made that clear to everyone around me. The idea frightened me a great deal.
I was absolutely shocked when I found out I was pregnant, and I also didn't believe it because I have Polycystic Ovaries.
When I found out I was 9 weeks pregnant I was surprised because I thought I knew I was 4 weeks! I wasn't sure if I was going to keep this baby because I was absolutely scared out of my wits!, but as soon as I saw my little bubs on the screen and her beating heart ,when I went for my dating ultrasound, I knew I wanted to keep my baby. Even though things around me were not ideal I knew I would make it work somehow. Baby Pike, if you listen to your heart you cannot go wrong. Trust your feelings. That's what I did and now I am so so grateful. And things will seem less scary once you start learning more about your pregnancy, and you will. There is plenty of wonderful information out there :)

Don't worry about how your diet has been and that you haven't been taking folic acid etc. My diet wasn't the best before I found out I was pregnant and my baby is perfectly healthy. It's never too late to start, so like a few other people here have mentioned, drop by your local chemist or supermarket and pick up a pregnancy multivitmain. I use Blackmores Pregnancy Gold.

All the best :thumbsup:

As for drinking, taking the pill etc when you don't even know you are pregnant, i would try not to be too worried as you can't turn back time anyway. (easier said than done i know :( ) reason i say this, is because i have read many times, that the baby only accepts into the placenta, what it needs and disregards or rejects the things it doesn't need or doesn't want. the body is amazing for what it can do.... my friend, she found out she was pregnant at 8 weeks and she'd been drinking lots on weekends and even taken drugs once or twice (naughty!) and her little boy is fine and he's nearly 4 now.

xx

Congratulations!! You lucky thing being 12 weeks you have fast forwarded and won't have to wait so long!! Don't stress about what you did/didn't take before you knew, when I was pg with DD1 we didn't even know about folic acid! (she is fine by the way LOL) I took Blackmores, as advised by others here, throughout my last pg and beyond, Coles has it as do chemists and healthfood stores.
Good luck with the rest of your pg you will find so much support and friendship here, you'll love it.

Hi Babypike,

First of all Welcome to BB its a wonderful place. Congratulations on your pg wishing you a wonderful and healthy pg.

Welcome to BB!! A huge congrats on your pregnancy. With vitamins i never took them before we tried for DD and i stopped taking them with her cos i was constantly vomitting them back up-she is healthy now.

With new bub now ive been taking them since 6 weeks....

Goodluck :)

Hi Babypike!!
Congratulations, just wanted to wish you a happy & healthy pregnancy!! Once the thought of having a baby settles in you'll be so excited & wont look back...
Babies are such a blessing & if you weren't trying it must be meant to be!! :)
I hope everything goes really well for you. The members of this forum are great & you can talk about ANYTHING if you need to so always feel welcome to look at all the different posts (this website beats reading any baby book for advice!!)
Enjoy the pregnancy because the time will fly... :) :) :)

I know exactly how u feel! My DP at the time (now DH) and i hadn't been together for very long when i found out i was 4 weeks preg it was such a surprise to us both and he was in victoria i was in sydney so it was hard to come to terms with!! I was pretty anxious and scared thru the pregnancy but excited expecially when my DS started kicking and moving around and every night without fail he would get hiccups not long after i got to bed and i would watch my belly move up and down! He is almost 3 now and i woudn't swap him for anything!!
Best wishes for a healthy and happy pregnancy! Isn't it amazing watching them on screen in an ultrasound? I go for my second ultrasound in a few weeks for baby number 2 and can't wait!!

Welcome to BB and CONGRATS to your pregnancy. Sometimes, the unplanned are the best events that happen in our lives!

Did you Ob ask you to do a NT test? I had a friend who did not take folic acid until she found out she was pregnant at week 14. I agree with CelticMoon that you should have a discussion with your Ob regarding the pills you were taking and also the lack of folic. At least, this will give you a clear idea of your pregnancy and also to be on the safe side.

Pregnancy is one of the best gift a woman could have. Of course, this package comes with some discomfort, but in the end, it's so worthwhile being able to hold your little one!

You have found the best site to get support, encouragement, and advise. When I was in distress (this is my first pregnancy), I searched for a site to find support. BB has given me so much support...

I wish you a healthy pregnancy!

Hi Baby Pike.

My wonderful lad wasn't expected quite yet and believe me, he is the most perfect thing to ever happen! Well done for deciding to keep your baby, I'm sure you will be truely blessed with this child.

So many things, like breakfast cereal, are fortified with vitamins and folic acid, plus it naturally occurs in some foods, so don't worry about not taking supplements just yet. After all, healthy babies were born in the days before supplements, right? I didn't find out until I was 8w along, although I'd been taking folic acid most days, but not all the preg vitamins and I'd been eating peanuts, a big no-no in pregnancy with a DH with allergies. I'd also been helping fit a bathroom, including shifting the new basin and bath, being banned from using the loo for a day and various other heavy lifting stuff that I shouldn't have done. Some things are just meant to be and there's nothing we can do to change that.

Hey Baby Pike, my first preg was unplanned, I didn't find out til I was 15 weeks!! During that time I was smoking and partying. I even helped my mum move house was picking up bookselves and beds. Anyway I ended up with a healthy little boy and I wouldn't have it any other way. Congratulations on your pregnancy and don't stress too much about not taking the supplements, as Ryn said "healthy babies were born in the days before supplements"


Ellie