2yo refusing day time sleep

I'm sure there will have been a thread about this already, but I haven't found one yet. Jack was 2 in Feb and we have recently hit the "terrible twos". He has always been such a great sleeper so the biggest shock for me is his recent refusal to stay in bed for his daytime sleep. I have tried a child proof gate (which due to design and location of his door was a big PITA as it opened outwards into a narrow corridoor), which kept him in his room ok, but not his bed. He is also very bright so bargains/bribes such as "if you stay in bed you can have a coin for your money box" used to work well with him, but don't in recent times. I am currently working on the "take his hand and walk him back to bed" strategy. Unfortunately we have had a couple of weeks with lots of interruptions (ie MIL baby sitting one day, being out for daytime sleep one day etc) and I haven't achieved much. I try for an hour (which is spent constantly walking a laughing 2yo back to bed), then stop. The first day I did this, after 20 mins he calming told me "Jack pushing boundaries" - where on earth did he even learn this phrase?

So, my questions are - do you think this approach is the right one? and if so how long do I keep going (in terms of duration each day as well as how many days/weeks to continue for without a result)? and if not can you suggest another approach?

Interestingly, he still sleeps during the day at day care one day/week, or if MIL babysits at her house (but not if she does it at our house).

OH Melanie!

I don't know if I could have kept a straight face if DS had told me at 2 that he was pushing boundaries! :doh:

I would stick at it if you know you have a good week or 2 that will be without the interupptions to routine

The only thing I found that worked was to sit with them till they fell asleep. As annoying and sometimes really impractiacal.. it was a sanity saver. with my youngest I just lay with him till he falls asleep now. I know if I didn't he wouldn't stay in his bed either.

Probably not such a practial idea for you but ti works.. or maybe you could sit in the door way and each time he gets off his bed tell him No! lay down.. slowly move away from the door each time

ah Melanie, welcome to my life of daytime sleeps. I work on the objective of getting Matilda absolutely smashed by doing some full on activity in the morning or going to the park for an hour in hopes that she's so smashed she will HAVE to fall asleep ;) didn't work today, or yesterday or Wednesday LOL but works sometimes. Maybe Jack & Matilda can wear each other out???

LOL Christy - bring it on!! We still haven't managed that catch up at Carindale! I will have to email you to set it up but I have no email atm. I have tried wearing him out. I even invented a game which involved Jack running up and down the backyard! Still didn't work!

Rayray, yes, it was hard to not start laughing! I would still love to know where he got that from!

Nic, unfortunately that doesn't work either! He won't lie still if I am lying with him, or even in the room.

I guess it's an age related thing and I'm not alone!

How is he sleeping at night?
Is it possible that he no longer needs the day sleep?
I only say this because my brother ceased all daytime sleep at about 16-18 months of age. My mum tried to force the issue and if he did take a daytime nap he was then awake until about midnight - only to still wake at 6am. But if he didn't sleep during the day he was in bed by 7pm and slept 12 hours!

Just like some people take longer to sleep at night or sleep lighter some kids stop their daytime sleeps earlier. I don't mean to be the bearer of bad news but he may be one of those kids. Of course persist if you think its a phase but it might just be that he is one of those kids that prefers a bigger chunk at night than a small nap during the day to keep him going. I have gf's who's kids were like this. My Paris on the other hand had 2 sleeps till she was nearly 3 and had 1 daytime sleep till um now, even on weekends if she's a wee bit tired she'll ask to have a nap and take herself off to bed. But as for my friends who did have kids that dropped the sleep early they still kept this time as "quiet time" so the children had to stay in their room they could read some books or play quietly on their bed but no running around or jumping. In a way it was a way to teach them to have some "relaxation time". Most of these kids I now know to be well adjusted 5 & 6 yr olds and their mum's did survive ;) Its hard to let go of these things I think as its another reminder that they are growing up *sniff*. I think you are doing a great job, and as ray said I would have first been gobsmacked then would have found it hard to keep a straight face. I think you have a very bright spark there. Maybe his mind is racing so fast he finds sleeping overrated ;)

*hugs*
Cailin

my youngest still naps now for up to three hours and he is 3 1/2!! but my 4 1/2 year stopped napping at two. after all the different ways you have done i cheated! i gave him a small cup of warm milk, tucked him into MY bed and put on a kiddy movie (usually Dora) and within 15 minutes he would fall asleep.
every child is so different. its 8.40am and my 4 yr old has been up since 6am and my 3 yr old is still fast asleep (im sooo jealous of his sleep ins!)

good luck.........

A friend of mine was visiting us last week with their 2year old. And he sounds just like your 2 year old Melanie (and his name is Jack too lol). He dropped his day time sleeps as soon as he turned 2, he is so full of energy that no matter what they do to tire him out, he just doesn't stop. But if he's at daycare, or being babysat by someone else, he'll have day sleeps. What's worse for them, is every since they introduced the bed, he's stopped sleeping well at night. So both day and night are absolute nightmares for them.

They're still trying to find an answer, so I'll keep an eye on this thread and let them know the suggestions.

Thanks gals. I admit that I really don't want him to stop daytime sleeps, but also I think he still needs them. On the days that he doesn't have a sleep (pretty much every day lately), we have a terrible afternoon with a 2yo who is grizzly, noisy and very naughty. And of course because he is noisy, Tom gets woken up and then I have two tired, grizzly boys! Often he then also falls asleep on the couch at around 5 - 6pm and sleeps through, so he misses DH and dinner. When he does have a day sleep, he usually sleeps for 2 -3 hours and will still go down for the night around 7 - 7:30 with no fuss and sleep through. So I think this is pointing to him still needing the day sleep. He has been in a big bed for about 10 months now and we have had no problems with his sleeping until now.

Jodi, how interesting about your friends' boy. He does sound a lot like Jack. I wonder why they sleep at day care but not at home.

Cailin, I think you are right with what you say about his mind racing. He doesn't like to miss out on anything and even has trouble sitting still to eat - he's always trying to grab at things etc. Actually, now that I mention it, this sounds like me - I can't eat, watch TV etc without doing something else at the same time. Ooh, lightbulb moment!

I think atm I need to perservere and hope that he just gives in one day soon!

Maybe Jack is ready to drop his daytime sleep. Some kids drop their sleep but still need a day or 2 a week where they may still need it - so maybe his daytime sleep at day care is the day! I must say I miss my sit down cuppa now Mackenzie doesn't sleep duirng the day but the 7pm bed time is also wonderful. If she does happen to fall asleep on the way home from somewhere we pay for it with a problem bedtime at night so I find it easier to keep her up and active for the trade off! Good luck in whatever you decided to do - perserver or just go with the flow.

Another solution that worked with my eldest. I darkened the lounge for day sleeps and popped a movie or a quiet type of show on and lay down on the floor and eventually he nodded off. not everyday though.. But you never know it might work..

Melanie I have days where Matilda will fall asleep in front of ABC kids around 3.30pm and then I wake her up at 4.30pm because otherwise she won't go to sleep until 10pm. She won't fall asleep if I put her in bed, but she gets so tired she has to rest at some point, otherwise she tantrums from around 5.30pm-6.30pm and falls asleep a mess LOL

Maybe we need to get them together after they haven't slept ;) run them ragged for a good night LOL

LOL Christy, even better - after they haven't slept we leave them with our DHs and we get together ;) . I'm so tired atm, Tom is sick and was awake most of last night. Tonight DH is out and Tom is waking up crying every 10 mins. I hope he settles before I go to bed. Luckily Jack has been asleep since 7:15pm and hasn't been woken up by the crying - I guess one benefit of him not having his day time sleep yet again :rolleyes:

Zander is the same at the moment - for the last week he has not slept in the day at all. He seems to want to sleep in of a morning & go to bed at normal time rather than sleep in the day. I think we're going to keep trying with day sleeps & if it continues to not work he'll just go to bed a little earlier I think. Poor daddy will miss out on seeing him, but he gets so naughty & over tired if he doesn't sleep in the day.

Sorry Melanie, not much help to you LOL! But I do totally sympathise ;)

Tehya's another one trying to ditch the day time sleeps. It's killing me, I so need a break from her in the daytime. If she doens't have a sleep she is one overtired and super cranky little girl. Even though she has never been a big sleeper, even her daytime sleeps we only get a maximum of 1 hour out of her. Hardly enough time to get anything done.

I find it hared too because my big boys would have a daytime nap nearly everyday of up to 3 hours. Right up til they started school. Noah and Tehya on the other hand. Well, some days I can get Noah to have a nap, and he will go for afew hopurs too, but never Tehya.

Goodluck hun, I think you are doing the right thing persisting, even if it's just for some quiet time. You need a break too. Oh yeah, I would have lost it when Jack told you he was pushing boundaries. Atleast he know's what it is he's doing. LOL.

What is with all these 2yos suddenly refusing their sleeps!

Well the lastest update is that Jack is currently asleep for his second day time sleep in two days. But I think it's more luck than anything LOL. Saturday night Jack was awake most of the night so he fell asleep on the couch yesterday around 10:30. We moved him into bed and he slept for 2.5 hours. Today he has still been tired and also DH is home sick. DH put Jack down at 12 and he went straight down. I guess we have to wait and see what happens tomorrow when things are back to normal.

LOL Zander slept today as well for 2 full hours!! I think wearing him out in the morning is the key here...

I hope it continues for you Melanie :crossfingers:

My DS swent through this too. I introduced "quiet time". Wehre he lies on the couch/fall at 11am and watches t.v. He falls asleep everytime without fail. Sometimes it might take an hour but other times withing 10 mins. He now sleeps in his bed during the day again. Good luck with it.

Ellie

Oh well, I'm sorry to report that he hasn't slept the last two days. I'm almost ready to give up but not quite. We are all of us sick atm, hopefully I'll get renewed energy when I feel better.

I am so relieved. Jack is now asleep for his third day sleep in 3 days! Hooray. Fingers crossed that that phase has passed!

How is everyone else doing?

yay... and how did you get him to sleep in the end :)

I can now say that we are definitely back on track. He is going down easily for his sleep again. In honesty I think it's just that the phase passed, rather than what I did. But I did start telling him he would get a coin for his money box if he stayed in bed. And I used a very firm voice telling him that he had to stay in bed or he wouldn't get a coin.

I had on occassion raised my voice with him when he wouldn't go down and I think this did more harm than good. As usual, using gentle approaches and being patient were far more productive.

So good to know it's not just me!! It's only been a week so far, but I think the midday sleeps have gone :( DD isn't sleeping at Kindy either.

MelanieR: does DS actually sleep in bed now or is it he just stays in his room and has quiet time? The first couple of days were a struggle to get DD to stay in the room but after having a very stern discussion with her after I found her naked in her room and had just pee'd on the floor :wall:, I don't think she'll muck around anymore. Still doesn't sleep though.

The weirdest thing is I kind of thought this would be a gradual thing where they start to reduce their sleeping time until it becomes nothing. Up until Sunday, she was sleeping 2-2.5hrs for her midday nap and then as of Monday, nothing - not a wink!! She did change into a 'big girls bed' recently but she's been in that for about 3 weeks without a hitch.

Arrrr, farewell peace n quiet. Guess it's got to go at some point but didn't expect it to be this early.