I think we may have a problem here

The other week at my daughters daycare I witnessed a child how was doing the wrong thing by jumping off his chair while eating so the teacher grabbed him by the arm and sort of dragged him a bit and then he feel over. I was a little taken back by this but thought "oh no Im over reacting a little here". Anyway yesterday when I got to daycare to pick up my daughter, I was walking up the corridor and saw my daughter walk outside. She was followed by a teacher. She was then dragged by an arm back into the room (not very far about 2 metres) and she lost her footing though. I then walked in and the teacher looked up and it was like she was waiting for me to say something. I was sorta in shock and just stared at her and she went on about how some teacher had Leahs hair up and it looked really good. I dont know if I should take it as she was pulling Leah back into the classroom or what. I know at that age kids do tend to be pulled around a bit but I thought I was the only one allowed to do that and Im not allowed to do it forcefully. Leahs case was less aggressive than the little boy but the look on this womans face as she was doing it was just cranky so Im starting to get a little worried now. Do u think im being a little protective cos of the raging pregnancy hormones?

Uh no dont think you are overreacting..id be furious if someone touched my child like that!

Jo

I dont think you are overreacting. And I wouldnt let anyone treat my child this way. You have a right to speak up. :)

Its hard to comment without seeing how it happened.
At DS' creche, they would take him by the hand and walk back into the room, or pick him up if need be. I've never seen a child dragged though, not sure how I would react.

I think the fact that she looked at you, waiting for you to say something says it all. Makes you wonder just how 'rough' they can get with the kids if they are playing up or if the teachers are in a bad mood.Do you know the mum of the other little boy? If you want to take it further, talk to her about it and see if she will support you.

If grabbing by the arm and dragging or pulling/yanking the child then I would find a new daycare. That place should be shutdown or the staff fired for that garbage!

speak to the boss or change daycare. our children are there in our trust that nothing will happen to them and nobody will be rough! i dont drag my own kids by their arm. i stop and speak sternly to them then walk them back by the hand. i would expect my childcare to do the same... obviously this woman is a bit short tempered.

I would definately say something & I'd probably start looking at other daycares around. I'd also ask other mums (mothers group, playgroups, family, friends etc) if they can recommend anywhere, you'd probably be surprised with what other daycares are out there & how they treat the kids in their care.

I wouldn't be leaving DD there though, thats just the occasion you've seen, I'd hate to think of what may happen any other time or day. It makes me furious just thinking about it. DD is a month older than Leah & I would flip if I saw that happen to her at her daycare, we've been lucky enough to find a nice friendly daycare centre first go, but secretly I do try to sneak in (& sometimes peek through the window before entering) just to see how everyones acting while parents arent there, I cant help it haha. Maybe try to sneak a peek before you go in?

But my suggestion would seriously be to change daycare, I hate the thought of children being dragged like that & the fear they'd be feeling, it really does bring tears to my eyes (& ANGER!)

I keep thinking well what if she was just sorta hurrying her up a bit or maybe Leah was fighting it so it looked like she was getting dragged in but she still shouldnt of done that.

Not on... I would personally be looking elsewhere for care.

I would definately be asking some questions as to why they dealt with your daughter that way. ;)

I don't have kids, but after reading that, i would consider changing day care for sure. your children are too precious to risk anything like that there are no excuses for her doing that no way

Oh dear, I'm not pg and I would be totally upset by this!! My DD is looked after by one of my best gfs and her nanny throughout the week and I know they would never do this with her. Likewise when I am minding my gfs DS for the day.

I would make a complaint to the manager. Right away and in writing. And if you're not satisfied with the response, I'd be looking for another childcare centre. In fact, I'd probably be looking anyway, just in case I didn't like the response. I think your instincts as a Mum are spot on. How does Leah behave towards the teacher in question?

God, this is why i'm too worried to put Smee in dyacare - it's such a little thing on the one hand. NO-one harmed, no crying etc. And yet i just feel sick at the idea of your little one having to deal with crankypants carer all day :(

I sometimes grab smee and she loses her footing (she's only been walking about 6 weeks) but i then wait for her to regain it. If she's in danger (edge of road) i guess i might drag her/yank her but in a corridor?

I don't think you're overreacting - Sherie's right - she was waiting for you to react so she KNEW she shouldn't have done it.

B

I dont think that you have over-reacted at all. I think the fact that the teacher looked at you waiting for you to react says it all. She obviously knows that she was wrong in what she was doing. Nessa is right they are not allowed to do anything like that at all, my SIL works in one and they aren't even allowed to say no(silly concept to me) so to pull a child by the arm, that's a definant no, no. I agree with what a few of the others have said, put in a formal written complaint and start looking elsewhere.

Goodluck with it all hun.

Love

I havent read all the post to this thread YET.but i wanted to say that what you have observed is an act in braking the LAW. And it should be reported and if you choose not to and just remove your child from care then you are not protecting the rights of other children that may even take your childr place. I know this is a scary thing to do. But even i work in children services and if i see something and was not comfortable discussing it with staff then i would phone DHS AND REPORT WHAT I HAD SEEN. they will them follow this up with a spot check. This may sound harsh and no one likes Dhs to visit but they have their job for this reason. Also is this service accrecated.

I would talk to the director of the childcare, I would be very worried if this happened to Maria

Make yourself heard, hon. They are suppose to look after your child, if you don't feel comfy with what's going on - speak up!! Letting it slide once, next time it could be worse. I agree with the everybody, look around for a other alternative
Good luck!

Has anything else happened with this? Hope there have been no more dramas.

Jo

Yep I second everyone else. Find somewhere else, then make an official complaint. Thats disgusting. I have never ever dragged my child even at their worst and there is no need for it whatsoever. I would have totally ripped her head off if that was me. You are definitely not overreacting, you have these feelings for a reason they are there so we protect our children from harm. Its mothers instinct, trust it.

Goodluck hon, not a nice feeling I'm sure!

*hugs*
Cailin

this is why im not going back into child care!! the horror stories i could tell would shock some of you!!:( but on saying that there are some FANTASTIC childcare workers out in the field!!!
i would see the director or staff member involved and voice your concerns!

Once again, it is not mandoritory that you report in Victoria but it is your duty of care above and beyond that means that who ever you are this need to be reported or you are as much to blam, the other ctsff at the service are not doing there jobs properly if they do not report this

I feel very strongly about this and will not stand for it, and at time it has almost cost me my job, but at the end of the day there is no one that would not agree that i was working for the interect of the children.

I hope something has been dont

Leah, I think if you haven't now that you should report this incident. I understand your apprehension cause I am a full time mum and have no choice but to use the child care system and I think there are some very good reason's for sending kids there my kids enjoy going it's great for their social outlet that I could never give them at home (if that was an option - which it is not).

One of the carers where my kids go was caught out pulling on a child's ear this was not taken lightly by the director and they would never have known about it (cause they are generally not in the rooms) if a parent hadn't spoken up.

You need to say would I handle my child like that and if you have a niggling feeling of doubt you should and must follow in your instincts that's a part of us parenting and it's our obligation to protect our children and sometimes this unfortunately means we have to put ourselves in a confronting situation and speak up to protect our children.

Quote: "this is why im not going back into child care!! the horror stories i could tell would shock some of you!! but on saying that there are some FANTASTIC childcare workers out in the field!!!"

It does saddens me though that someone that has worked in the child care industry would make a remark as such when you would know full well that sometimes parents must place children in child care and saying things like this scares the living heck outta every normal parent - what do you do not send your kids to school either cause it could happen there.

Having worked in the child care industry myself I can assure you that although there are some bad eggs out there (because that's just people good and bad in every nationally) this is not the norm. People don't generally work in child care for the money they usually do it cause they have a genuine love of children. If their temper starts to get the better of them or they stop enjoying it they must consider another line of work because they are looking after our children - after all.

Little Sproket,

I am an early childhood teacher and I agree with the other posts. I don't know where in the world you are from, but here in Sydney that is not allowed. At work, I would be in serious trouble if I ever laid my hands on a child like that. And besides the fact that your DD may have been 'escaping' the room there is no reason to drag her anywhere. I am sure there would have been a better way to deal with the situation, like to pick her up and bring her in if she was struggling. If I were you I would firstly talk to the director/owner/boss! And tell them about both of the incidences you witnessed. If they don't take it seriously, take it further. If your child is really happy at the centre I don't know that I would take her out. It might just be the carer who has the issue not the centre. But if your gut tells you that moving her is the right thing to do- listen to it! Noone knows what is best for your babies better than you.

ETA: dd311, I totally agree with you that this would be a rare occurance, and having worked in childcare for 11yrs, I am confident enough to tell parents that. Things like this do not happen often and it is sad that other childcare workers have had bad experiences in bad centres. I have worked long term in many centres (about 5) and done work experience in more and I have only once come into contact with a situation I was not comfortable in and which was not appropriate. And it was dealt with swiftly and appropriately, because staff and parents did the right thing of reporting the incidence to the director.