Dummy Weaning

Hi!

My DD Briley is 17 months and is totally dependent on her dummy. I am OVER IT! She won't go to sleep without out. Won't be in the car without and when she is grizzly walks around crying for it if she has lost it. I try not to let her walk around with it during the day but with a 3 month old to tend too the dummy sometimes because a nessessity.

I have reached my tether today with it. I knew she was tired so i was going to put her in the bath and then to bed. Before that i made a bottle for her and she spotted it! BIG MISTAKE!! She chucked a major tanty and i could'nt find the damn dummy. She screamed and carried on the whole time i was looking for it. I finally found it and she went to bed without a bath and with the dummy!

Anyways....getting to the point....My question is....

How to i get rid of it???? Does anyone have any methods i could use to wean her of it. I would be willing to try anything at the moment.

All replies appreciated!

TIA!

You could try either limiting it to sleep time use only, or going cold turkey and getting rid of it completely. I think whatever method you chose will be hard for her and you at first. So you're going to have to be completely reading to do this. I got rid of the dummy at 12 months, but Nina was showing signs of not wanting it anymore. I decided she didn't need it anymore and threw them all out, that way I couldn't give in. And maybe replacing the dummy with another comforter, like a teddy or something?
I hope whatever you chose to do works quickly for you both.

A friend of mine told her son that at christmas time you have to leave your dummy on the christmas tree and santa will take it and give it to the new babies at the hospital. And in return santa gives your daughter presents (of course).

It worked for her son and he never asked for it back. Hope this helps worth a try all kids love presents. Also get rid of them out of the house in the bin so then you can't give in and she can't find them.

Nikki

Hey Sara,
We were talking about this in mothers group the other day. Some mums had heard of the technique where you get your bub to swap the dummy for something else they want - ie, literally getting them to hand the dummy over to the check-out person in the shop, in exchange for a toy or something (with you obviously slipping some cash to them as well, LOL!). Also leaving the dummy out for Santa to take away was suggested (if you can hold out til Christmas?!) Or making a big deal about throwing the dummy away on a particular day, having your DD put it in the wheelie bin herself, and then using loads of praise. The rubbish man then is the baddy for taking the dummy away, not you.

But as you know, my DD is still very young and I have no experience with a 17 month old, so I'm probably no help!! My DD uses a dummy for getting to sleep, so I am sure I am going to have to deal with weaning too sooner or later.

Good luck!!

My DS does use a dummy for sleeping and he also has a 'blanky' - a piece of cloth about the size of a pillow case. Overnight he drops the dummy but can always find the blanky which he is happy to suck on.
You could go with something like that but then it may just be substituting another problem. I really like the santa idea.

Hi sara i dont have any advice on taking the dummy away from Briley, but i can tell you that Archie is exactly the same with his dummy and there is no way i could have the heart to take it off him, for me personally i would feel it would be cruel to take something that makes him feel comfy and secure away from him and expect him to deal with it. That said, i now most mums take the dumy away around this age and thats fine, each to their own, whatever works blah blah blah. If you are interested there is a very interesting article on the CYH website about comfort items.'

Good luck, if you do decide to get rid of Briley's dummy i hope it goes really smoothly.

I'm currently going through a similar situation. DD is 2 yrs 6 months now & I've been happy for her to use her dummy for sleep time or comfort when she is sick. I have told her that Santa will be taking them this Christmas as she is a big girl now in her big girl bed etc etc She seems ok so far but I dont think she's actually understanding that it means NO MORE DUMMIES lol

I love the idea of hanging them on the tree, yes I did say THEM, she has about 6. I honestly haven't had a problem with her using them for so long, I just think that as she's approaching 3 next year its a good time to get rid of them.

I wish you heaps of luck!! I know these things can be hard, not only for the child but so so hard on the parents too!

Thanks so much for all your advice and comments girls. They are all great.

I really like the Santa one but i think that Briley might be a bit young to understand yet. I am happy to give them all a go though.

Briley is going through a stage at the moment which i am not sure is an early terrible 2's or if its her teeth or something else. She has been waking up cranky after every sleep lately and throws a major tanty. If you try and go to her she kicks her legs and carries on crying and screaming. She woke up at 1am thismorning with one of the "episiodes". I am almost pulling my hair out!!! But thats another story altogether!!!

So i am not game to take the dummy away yet!!

sara, probably a good idea to let her have the dummy for a little longer. Wait until you are both ready (like when she's not sick, and happy). Maybe if you can slowly get her out of the habit of having it during the day? So maybe during the day when she's happy, make sure it's put away in a cupboard so she can't see it.
Good luck with the tantrum throwing, can't help you with that one, we haven't reached that stage just yet.

Once Zander hit around 1 year old we taught him that dummies were for bedtime only. He got to the point where we'd walk in to get him out of the cot he'd spit the dummy out LOL!! Now a 2.5 years old he still has it in bed, but will be leaving it out for Santa in a few weeks time.

We weaned Lexi to having her dummy at sleep time only..... then just a month ago I stopped giving it to her at sleep time too.... only had a ouple of sleepless nights & she only asked for it twice....

She still has her cuddly rug though.. but that is only for sleep time too!!!

Good luck

We took DS' to the beach when he was 2 and we buried it in the sand for the "sand fairies" he was fine after that :)

Jesse only has it at sleep times now. Ive got him into a habit of when i pick him up out of his cot and say put your dummy in bed, he will pull it out of his mouth and drop it in his bed. I'll praise him and thats where they live now. That might be a starter, just to get her to only associate them with sleep to start with, then perhaps give them to santa come christmas. But the rule is.. once theyre given to Santa, they dont ever ever come back. So you cant go back on the idea otherwise it will make it harder.
Best of luck.

Hi,

I know someone who snipped the top of the dummy off so it just didn't feel the same. Also you can have a hook by your door and hang the dummy on it when you go out so it cuts that part out, then slowly let them use it less and less.

Tehya STILL has her dummy and yes it is driving me crazy too. It's a major comfort thing for her. She is my only baby to have used a dummy so I've never had to go through the whole weaning or getting rid of thing. To top it off though she still has a bottle for naps too. Up until a few months back she would just have a bottle whenever but I have put my foot down on that one.

I too am thinking of leaving the dummy for Santa. My only issue is with a new baby right before Christmas is this going to really upset the apple cart and what if bub has a dummy, is Tehya going to pinch it ???

I tried the cutting the end off the dummy thing too... but the little madam still sucked it!!!!!... so she had to go cold turkey LOL

Lexy has a milk bottle for sleeps & naps too & 1 in the morning 1st thing!!!

my mum just cut a milimetre off the end of the dummy every 2 days. my brother never noticed the difference at first, but by the time it was half the usual length he just ditched it as it wasn't very satisfying anymore! try this.

lots of kids get so addicted to dummies - I seriously don't understand why people have a baby and then just presume it needs a dummy?? why do people use them so frequently? I know some kids really benefit, but I don't think as many NEED them as get them. I mean I've heard people say that they packed a dummy for hospital when they were only going to be staying overnight with their newborn.

dd has never had one ever (at almost 6 months), neither did I nor my sister. mum felt my bro needed one though as he was miserable all the time due to severe reflux and the dummy helped to keep him calm. even though dd clearly is fine without one, I've had all sorts of friends tell me how I should give her one and how it will make my life so much easier - but she's fine already without! can anyone enlighten me on why people keep pressuring me to get her a dummy? am I missing out on something?????

Nicole, for me it wasn't something I pushed my daughter into having. As I said none of my other children had a dummy just Tehya. Why ?? Because she was a huge comfort sucker. It was not feasible for me to have my nipple in her mouth 24/7 so I got her a dummy. And my nipples got a well earned rest.

As with all things in parenting, it is up to you to decide what is right for you and your baby.

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I too am thinking of leaving the dummy for Santa. My only issue is with a new baby right before Christmas is this going to really upset the apple cart and what if bub has a dummy, is Tehya going to pinch it ???

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Trish, I worried about this with Nina as all the other babies at daycare had dummies, but once it was gone and she got over it, she never bothered with it. She found one in her toy box the other day and didn't even suck on it, just threw away.

Thanks Jodi. I only hope this is the case. Maybe I can try the whole big girl / baby thing with her too. Not sure if that will work though, she asks for a bubba's nappy or bubba's pyjamas lately. Think she is digging her heals in.

Trish,
I agree in cases like tehya's it's a great way to get a rest when they can't settle without a suck and they won't take a thumb, and it should be a mum's own choice.

but why then do all these mums keep telling me I am crazy not to get her one (when she almost NEVER cries?) She's like the only baby I know without one - adn lots of them are just as happy and easily settled as her - but the mums keep trying to push it in their mouths to stop them from making normal baby noises (i.e. babbling and squealing) when the mums are talking to other women etc. Others are trying to "train" their newborns to take one. Why??? I"m seriously puzzled. surely if the baby needs to be "Trained' to take it - it doesn't really want one - therefore what's the point?

ugh. We're at this stage with Caty. She only has it for sleeps, and even then it's only under duress that I give it to her. Two weeks ago it wasn't an issue, but somehow we had to give it to her a few sleeps in a row and now she goes nuts when she doesnt' have it. Crazy that it only took a few sleeps to get her to that stage. We'll try the snip I think :) She screams blue murder....

Next baby there will be no dummy! I so hate the look of a dummy rather than a cute little mouth....UGLY!