i don't know what to do anymore

My DD has been yelling and screaming all day. The last few days its getting worse. It can't be teething as there are no bumps and none are cutting. She is 11 months old. She will not sleep, unless in the pram in a five point harness so she cannot roll over. In her cot I have to strap her into a Safe T Sleep and pin it to the mattress on both sides, as she rolls over and crawls out the top and then stands up and cries hysterically. She won't let me hold her and constantly bucks and kicks out of my arms. She plays happily for short times then gets very upset, especially if I leave the room. On saturday night she goes back to her father for six weeks. I'm at a friend's place for 2 weeks, and I am thinking of just taking her back with me early as I don't think her father can look after her well. Its taking me 3 weeks to settle her down back into a happy baby with a routine. With her father, he thinks routines are unnecessary and I'll probably have a worse problem when she comes back as then she'll be a toddler.

Please help! I'm at my wits end with her.

oh hun, I can't offer any advice - but :hug:

Oh hun :hug:

The only thing I can think of is that she is teething, babies teeth can move in their gums for months before erupting. Brendan was teething for months before he got the lumps and then cut.

Big Hugs.... I hope you can settle her.

Aww Catherine :hug: . That sounds really tough on you. Have you had your DD checked over by a GP incase there is anything causing her pain/discomfort (maybe an infection or something)? Would you be open to getting her checked over by a paediatric chiropractor? We took our eldest DS to one when he was younger and found he had a dislocated right shoulder from birth that was making him really unsettled and clingy. He was a different child after it was corrected. I'm not saying this is your DD's problem, but a chiro may be able to help? It could also just be a phase she is going through or maybe her teeth are moving, just not cutting yet. Have you tried giving her Panadol? Babies are such a mystery sometimes!

Sorry I'm not much help. I just know how frustrating it is when you don't know why your bub is behaving a certain way. I really hope she settles down for you soon. :hug:

Catherine i am so sorry to hear that - when my little girl comes back from her fathers we call it "deprogramming" until she is herslef a gain (no routines there either). Just hoping its not something else ike an ear infection, she is probably in pain by the sounds of it.

try to keep her at home till she is better - babies need their mummies when they are sick!!!

oh mummycate!! its so hard when they cry and you cant work out why.. big hugs to you!!

has she been sick lately?? or pulling at her ears?? maybe she might be coming down with something??
DD got like that before she got her ear infection!!

or maybe she can sence you getting worried about her going to her fathers for so long??

Just a thought, could she have sore ears? That always used to turn my bubs into terrors!

Hope things improve for you soon.

i would really see a dr,

as the other ladies as said, ear infections can turn a child into a monster and you dont really see any other signs apart form that.

and with regards to her dad, are you going to be seeing her while she is there for six week cause she may be feeling your tenseness over that situation

trish, that is a great idea... I had brendan seen by a chiropractor when he was about 7 months and his neck and back where both out, it also seem to help with Brendan's reflux.... he still has reflux but it is no where near as bad! Definatley a much happier baby after that :D

Hi Catherine, sorry to hear you're going through such a rough patch at the moment! That doesn't sound pleasant at all.

Have you considered the possibility that Elouise may have an ear infection or UTI? Both of those things can send a baby that way. Annika has had both, and was excessively cranky each time.

It could also be a wonder week, many babies go through these at around twelve months old. Maybe she's going through hers early?

If you do think it is teething (and boy do I know those back teeth cause them to kick up a stink!), you could try a couple of different things - wet wash cloth in the freezer, frozen banana, teethers cooled down in the fridge, baby panadol

maybe the routine your trying to get her in no longer works? and it needs to be changed as babies change all the time....
why wont you let her on her tummy? she is very active(obviously) it might be where she wants to sleep and her crawling around the cot might be looking for the best spot? i know i never stay in the one spot over night

will she sleep next to you if you lie down with her? then maybe move her to her own bed?
if you let her play and play would she just go to sleep on the floor? does she have to sleep in her bed atm?
just trying to think of ways just to get her to sleep then you too can rest and come up with some ideas that might work?

I have tried letting her fall asleep by herself. She decided that every ten minutes she'd have a 2 minute nap. But now she's at her dad's I don't know how he'll cope and he's not wanting to follow any routine. I'm just so depressed and angry at him and upset.

How long is she there?

BIG HUGS :hug:

Take Care and do something nice for yourself.

she's with him until no later than the 25th of feb. so 6 weeks total.

Catherine, thats ridiculous! I dont think nay courts would allow shared care where the child was to be taken from its mother for 6 whole weeks, especially at that age! Or it that what terms you guys have agreed to? DId he pressure you into that?

will you see her for her 1st birthday?? if you do then the 6 weeks wont be so long!

He does pressure me. I signed the piece of paper to get him to let me take her to Brisbane. Because I promised to bring her back. And I did and now he's doing this. I could stay to see her on her birthday. I'm just so overwhelmed. I have all my stuff packed in boxes in his garage (he and his mum packed my stuff) and i don't know whether to go through it and sort out what's going to charity etc, as if I have to stay in Sydney to be able to keep her, then what's the point of going through it all and repacking?

I'm going to suggest through mediation that he move to Brisbane. I can afford it, he can afford it, there is much more places available and he has said how easy it is to transfer uni. I think its the best solution.

Sending lots of strength your way - but dont miss out on her first bday, you will never forgive yourself!

I hope you get a solution that suits both you and El.

:hug:
Take Care