Being honest.. I dont enjoy it at all.. Is this normal???

Ok i will admit it I really dont like breast feeding much, I know of all the benefits etc to bub and dont get me wrong i will keep feeding ds for aslong as i can. But i was wondering is it normal to not enjoy it :( ? I have read many posts from women who absolutely enjoy it too no end and i am not sure why i feel this way. Ds has one ebm at night that dp feeds, we started off giving him ff at night for a few weeks until i got my supply up now i express a bottle for the night feed just for a break and i work 2 nights a week were ds had ebm. I only fed my dd(now 12) for 6 weeks and switched due to lack of supply (well back then i thought it was)and support.
I have fed DS for 3 months now and my goal is 6 months and beyond that i hope but need to focus on a realistic goal first.
Am i abnormal or are there other women out there who dont enjoy breast feeding?

Yeah, you don't have to love it :) It's just feeding a family member.. just like some people love to cook, and others just do it coz we have to eat!

I do love the experience, convenience, benefits etc etc. but I certainly don't gush about breastfeeding. So don't feel bad. Breastfeeding is just a normal part of life and good for you for continuing with it :)

Gosh no, I used to hate it. couldn't stand it one bit. Over time I have learnt to enjoy it for the things i get out of it, but i certainly dont love it. When DS was about your ds' age I think I was still in my daily cycle of doing as much as i could to distract him before i ahd to feed him because i was hating it so much.
It does get better. You're doing really well, you should be proud.

i have never liked the feeling of breast feeding its nice to be close to baby but don't get enjoyment out of breast feeding i count the minutes and hope he hurries up! I am also sticking to it but dont like it. Knows its great for baby this is my 4th child and never enjoyed it with them either i do understand where your coming from

You might also find that it grows on you more as DS gets older. Babies can be such demanding feeders in those first few months, and it is exhausting apart from anything else. I never disliked feeding, but I didn't get the warm and fuzzies from it in the same way others do (except when he'd fall asleep on the boob). Now that he's older, mobile, on solids and a much more efficient feeder I really enjoy these times together.

BTW you're doing a great job!

Hun, that is pretty normal. Most of us find we really do enjoy it after the initial "difficult" period is over, others never really "love" it but do it for all the other benefits. I hope that you do start to enjoy it, but if you don't, don't feel bad. Big hugs.

Thanks Girls.. Just needed to know i was not abnormal, well in this way anyway. lol
I think i am just really tired atm and as breastfeeding Ds has been out of routine somewhat the last few days i have found myself dreading him wanting a feed. I have had trouble expressing as he is feeding so often lately.
Maybe just need a good nights sleep but dont we all.

Hi,
Warning - this e-mail might win me a parenting "hall of shame" award!
There's a whole lot about parenting that, if we were truthful with ourselves, we really don't like. But we get on and do it anyway - because we know our children need it, because we know it makes them happy, because we are the grown-ups. Even sometimes because the government tells us. Do not tell anyone this.....but school reading bores me sensless. I think I would rather saw my arm off some weeks than listen to 28 preps read their readers. Soccer practise - it is freezing, messy, boring and repetitive.
Overall, I did love breastfeeding - but not everytime. Sometimes I just though "oh, for goodness sake - not again" You are certainly not alone in not loving it.
I heard a very fabulous quote the other day that made a huge impact on me. Some-one said "Happiness is not doing what you want - it's learning to like what you have to do"
I'm working on loving school reading....
And you are all sworn to secrecy.
Regards
Barb

Your secret's safe with us Barb :cryinglaugh:

No. I didnt enjoy it.
I didnt get infections, I didnt get cracked nipples, DS was growing well. It all went fine and easy right from him latching on and suckling properly as a brand new new born - but it was not enjoyable for me. I think I had some weird hormonal thing too that everytime he latched and the let down would come I`d feel sad and awful. I wasnt 'sad '- and it was 'awful', it just was something emotional that happened to me when he fed. I mentioned it to my midwife, GP and 2 community health nurses, but it was only the last one who said, 'lets do something about this'. the others all said they had never heard of symptoms like mine. Anyway, by the stage someone was willing to help, I had given up and told her not to bother, he was 6 mths and I had just begun weaning him.
All my friends with babies at the time said how much they loved BF, how close it made them feel - how nice it the sensation was etc and of course how they struggled when weaning time came.
For me, I thought I`d BF till at least 1yr, but I begun weaning at 6mth, and got him down to 1 feed in the mornings, then one morning I just told DH not to bring DS in to me, that I was finished. And I did, and I didnt struggle with it at all, and DS seemed not to mind either.

So, I do think, as you say, its sooo important to keep feeding them even if you dont enjoy it for as long as you feels right for you and your baby.
Im not sure if you just dont like doing it or if something more like my experience is happening for you, but your right in hoping that not everyone 'gets off' on it (sorry - hope that doesnt offend anyone, but thats really how from my perspectve at the time I felt my friends were enjoying it), not everyone does enjoy the experience .

I think your doing a great job to still be feeding even though you do not enjoy it and are working part time too -thats so much credit to you!!! What a smart and loving woman you must be! :clap:

Im the same as Cookiemonster. At first I didnt enjoy it. The only thing that I liked was feeling close to my baby. It just seemed like such a big task, one more thing on a long list of things to do kwim. But I have to say to be doing it this long PLUS working you are doing a fantastic job!!!!! :clap:

I found breastfeeding really boring. :P

I thought it was okaaay with #1 (he took forever though), I enjoy it more with #2. Barb is spot on though, I have found myself getting impatient and blah about it, and then taken a deep breath and tried to enjoy it. I look at my little guy and he's so little and cute and dependent on me, and then he pulls off and grins at me, then lunges back on...

So I guess it's normal, everyone has their things they like and don't like - see, I like changing nappies and many people don't. :P

Always knew you were weird Nelle :p

If it wasn't for the interweb I would find feeding quite boring, thank goodness for fakking. Now I love it because it's the only time I get to spend on the computer. :cryinglaugh:

You watch yourself Miss Suse, when I finally meet you I will have saved up all your whoopin's from insults like that and you will be in big trouble.

Perhaps Suse is onto something Abb (in spite of her insults :P). Can you do something you enjoy during feeds? Have chocolate that you can only eat at feeds? A good book? Browse the interweb (as Suse and Jeremy Clarkson call it)? So that you look forward to it?

Promises promises Nelle :p (BTW, you know I mean it in the nicest way - I like weird)

Or, how about sitting down to a good DVD? I've got through almost the entire series of the West Wing feeding!! That way you can focus less on the task, and more on seeing it as some 'you' time.

I hated feeding my first son.. I didn't enjoy it at all.. I found it boring to be honest. and I hated being the only one who could settle him.. I gave up at 3 months..

Now I enjoy it.. I enjoy the break I get from feeding. Sometimes it is the only time I sit down..

I feel proud of the fact I can breastfeed with very minimal drama.. Of course there are times (especially middle of the night) when I wish she was bottle fed..

I remember when I succeeded feeding Son 3 that I would feed till 6 months. We got there and thought oh well keep going.. We hit 12 months and I thought wow. I was one of those women who thoguht it was gross to feed beyond 6 months :lol: We finally stopped when he was 21 months.. Now I roll my eyes at my own comments I made many years back

Thankyou everyone :hug:
I am pleased to know that i am not alone with this feeling.
Suse and Nelle thanks for your advice i have set up a table beside arm chair that i feed in for laptop so i can search the "interweb" lol suse.
Salsa i have never had any of those things (cracked nipples, infections etc) i had a bit of trouble around 6 weeks but other than that all has been good except for the not liking it much which is why i have felt guilty really, as you hear and read all the story's of people on here with mastitis etc and they work on through it all so they can continue feeding for 12 months or more. I will focus on my 6 month goal i think and see where we go from there.
Barb lol at the soccer and reading. Thanks for the reference to the qoute it is a good one.
Big :hug: to everyone i know i wouldnt have made it this far if it wasnt for belly belly, i am from a family of bottle feeders mostly so as soon as i hit a bump in the road its always said why dont you just put him on the bottle.

ABB34 i have never made it past 8 weeks with out formula as well and never past 12 weeks breastfeeding. My goal is 3 months then 4 5 6 months. Keep up the good work. Do you find it extreamly painful when your boobs fill up i do i scrunch my face up and breathe through he pain it's very uncomfortable!:(

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Do you find it extreamly painful when your boobs fill up i do i scrunch my face up and breathe through he pain it's very uncomfortable!:(

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I actually have no pain at all now, i had some intial uncomfort in first six weeks but it does improve, the first 6 weeks of feeding i think i thought about giving up every feed, the thing that got me through was belly belly and i have nowmade it to 3 months and hope to continue as long as i can. I think it is a real achievment to Breast feed as it is so easy to take the easy road and give up so you are doing really well especially feeding with the pain but it will improve. Good luck

yeah, I never loved it, it was kind of a novelty at first, then became something that I just did automatically and some days I found it really exhausting. I thought I would breastfeed till 6 months but made it to 10 and now with another one on the way, I am thinking, 'blah blah breastfeeding again' - which makes me feel kinda bad. But on the good side, it is so easy (if it is going welll), convenient, no bottles to wash........you are doing a fantastic job, but certainly don't feel bad because you don't love it.

Laurin xxx

Me too. It has never been that wonderful together time for me. Just a chore. That being said, I breastfed DD for over 2 years and I am still breastfeeding DS. It really does get easier and the babies get quicker and you don't have to feed as often. Well done for keeping on going.

God yes, it was such a chore to begin with. And boring. I watched a LOT of tv during those first few months.
However, since around 3 months I actually started to enjoy it... though not always if I'm entirely honest. To some extent, it is just something that you have to do; but it is possible to learn to love it.

Actually, my little secret is that I've never really enjoyed bfing DD, not in the way I enjoy a good book or my favourite TV show - and it's been 2 and a half years!

BUT I did it because it was sooo convenient when she was little (and I'm a lazy sod LOL) and I continue to do it because I know how much SHE enjoys it. I make the effort to kiss her now and stroke her little face and I like that interaction. But I HATE the way she fiddles with whatever she can grab (sticks her finger in my belly button, grabs my nose, pokes my mole, really, it's quite painful!) and I would rather forget the times I was sick with mastitis, etc... I keep doing it now because she is so healthy and so confident that I think bfing must help. She's also the only toddler at preschool that I know that is rarely sick beyond a mild cold and has never had antibiotics. And I definitely love that - so here's hoping she keeps bfing for one more winter until she self-weans!

PS The only time I do like bfing is when she snuggles in bed next to me in the morning and I get lots of lovely cuddles. But that's more about the cuddles than the bfing!

Yep, I have felt pretty much the same as all you guys! Sometimes it's just plain annoying! like when you just feel like you need your own space or when you're exhausted, or even when it's cold!- lifting up my shirt is the last thing I feel like doing at times like that! Or like what Jennifer said, those times when DD just fiddles with everything drives me nuts!

I remember thinking in the first couple of weeks after bub was born 'how the hell do people keep doing this for months? Let alone YEARS!!' But, here we are now, DD 15 months, me 24 weeks pregnant and still bf! Some days it's great, others not so but overall I wouldn't have it any other way.

okay.....i seriously love it, i really do. But dont think anything less of someone who doesnt love it, no way. Like Liz said, its like cooking, some of us hate it, some of us love it, but hey, we have to do it......
I think my DH loves it more than me though.......:rolleyes: (never once has he had to get up for a 2am feed with our children....no wonder he loves it ).

Salsa,

You might find this webpage interesting. The D-MER.org Blog: Breastfeeding Aversion vs. D-MER
Some women find that with the letdown relex comes a dpression- a feeling of gloom that they can't shake.
Warm Regards
Barb

Update...
I am trying to enjoy feeding more, well i distract myself now by having laptop close by, (i am feeding atm) yay:dance:
I have made it to my goal of 4months, so my next one is 5 months..

Thankyou everyone so much for the support, I know i would have given up way before now if it wasn't for all of you.:grouphug:

Congrats on making it to 4 months Abb! :) I also feed at the computer (feeding atm too!).

Yay for you! I'm fak (feeding at keyboard) too. :p

Abb- Glad things are going well... I too am feeidng at the puter... have since i can remember... Hence why i'm on BB so much... LOL

I'd have gone nuts without my laptop, Oliver used to take up to an hour to feed in the early days. I taught myself to be able to type two handed and feed him at the same time by 8 weeks which made it much, much easier on me. God bless the internet, I don't know what I'd have done with out it!

I didn't enjoy it at first either, and I felt kind of bad about it too to be honest. I enjoy it most of the time, sometimes I just want some space though!

Good on you, Abb!!! Congratulations, and I hope there are many more happy months of bfeeding to come :)
I didn't enjoy it much in the first few weeks, then went through phases like others have said, where I did and I didn't. Just goes with the mummyhood territory, doesn't it? There are times when I just want to eat DD up, she's so sweet and my entire world! Then there are other times when I long for a break - where her voice is like a chainsaw in my head, LOL.
Hang in there, matey. You're going soooo well. :)

Thanks girls. I am still feeding and as alot of you said it seems to be getting easier or maybe i am just viewing it differently now. Thankyou all again for the support :grouphug:

Woooooooooo Hooooooooooo:leap::leap::hooray::hooray:
I made it
My goal was to feed until 6 months and i have achieved it.

Still feeding and i have found a way to deal with not enjoying it and its worked so far..

Just wanted to let everyone know if i can do it so can you.

Wow Abb, that's fantastic. Well done on six months of bfing. You have done a really great job.

Thank you for sharing.

Well done, Abb! It's even more of an achievement when it's not something you like to do...

Thanks girls i feel great to have got this far and now hope to continue for aslong as i can.