Non medical Elective C Section

Hi All,

I just wanted to hear from ladies who opted for the above and how and why they made the decision, and whether it was positive or negative experience.

Thanks

Just popping in to tag this thread as I'll be really interested to hear people's responses too :)

I cant speak from experience, but someone I know is so scared about the pain of birth that she is looking into perhaps having a c/s. She is that petrified that emotionally it is looking like the pregnancy would be a more positive experience for her if she has a c/s. I know that majority of people dont agree with this and there are numerous reasons why it is safer to have a vaginal birth etc. But she is seriously thinking about not having children (even though she really wants them) as her emotions about giving birth are so huge. I dont know what kind of decision she will make, but I do know that for some people it's not about being too posh to push. I think we as women judge too much and while I would not reccomend an elective c/s without medical reason, I dont think it is my right to judge a woman for doing so.

I hope that some people with actual experience can come forward and let you know their feelings.

A friend of mine took 7 years to conceive, and had gone through so much stress with trying, ivf, believing she was infertile, and worrying about miscarriage that the stress of labour was something she just didn't want to think about. She seemed to be very happy with her C-section and it made her pregnancy less stressful for her. She went on to have twins (naturally conceived), also by C-section, but went into labour initially so at least she got to feel what it was like - and I think she was pretty happy not to go through it!
Not for everyone, and not for me, but for some people I think they feel safer with CS.

My elective CS was for medical reasons (and I didn't like it) but a friend of mine had an elective CS with no medical reason. She is early 40's and it took her a few years to conceive through IVF. She wasn't opposed when her OB suggested a caesarean and to my knoweledge she has no regrets. Everyone is different though. You have to make the right choice for you.

My DS was delivered by c-section - with no medical reason. From things that I had been told - I didn't believe I could have a child naturally.

I didn't regret it, nor feel the desire to have a vaginal birth until he was 4 months old.

Recovery was ok - i healed well - although was perhaps more painful than needed to be because I was told the wrong information about pain relief.

Well u may have guessed the reason i asked is it is my dilemma. I can relate to your friends who did ivf as this is the way we conceived after almost 3 years of trying and several early miscarriages.

When i fell with this one i had had enough of the strain of ivf and resolved that it would be the last try. And funny how things work out, it was a big surprise. I still get worried something might happen but i try to be positive. The main reason that i am considering an e c/s is that the women in my family have all had traumatic vaginal births with 3 of those babies almost not making it. Luckily for emergency c/s they were ok. This scares the cr@p outta me!

Im not thinking of it to avoid pain of labour as it is a natural thing. I guess im worried that what if they dont do the emerg c/s fast enough if you do run into probs.

Maybe i should ask how common it is for siblings or related women to have similar birth experiences. A friend of mine is the one who got me thinking saying that i should be considering that family ties could determine my experience.

Thanks for your responses.

Nyrad
I'm so glad I read your post. We have had a similar journey. After 10 years and losing 6 babies I couldn't face anymore IVF/ICSI...so I gave up...finally accepted it wasn't to be...packed up and moved to the country...and then 6 months later we fell pregnant naturally. It has been a wonderful surprise but I have been struggling with anxiety and worry. I too am considering an elective C/S purely based on my current anxiety issues...I am more scared of labour and me having a panic attack and harming our baby. My Ob and GP have both been so supportive and not asking me to make any decisions right now but have both assured me that if that's the way we decide to go they understand. Just having the option has been a huge weight off my shoulders. I never thought I'd actually write this all down through fear of people judging me but our journey has been tough...and seeing Dh's face as they had him say goodbye to me as they rushed me off to surgery with a ruptured ectopic .. litres of blood already in my tummy ...was the scariest experience of my life...I don't think he or I can cope with something like that again. Thanks for listening :)

Congrats on your pregnancy Ellie, nice to hear from someone who i can relate to. :) I think experiencing the trials of the ivf process can make us more anxious about everything and more worriesome. Thankfully i have not had to deal with an ectopic though, you are a strong lady!

I would like the same as you, an obstetrician who will be open to my choice should i decide to go that way. Its good that you have the support of your gp and obstetrician. Hopefully mine will be the same when i see them in a few weeks time.

I too am a long term IVFer. I took 4 years and 8 cycles to fall pregnant. And I actually feel the reverse - I'm scared of having a c/s.

I had the advantage though of having birthed 3 kids previously vaginally, albeit over a decade previously. So I guess I knew my body could do it. But I agree that after many years of IVF, it seems natural to leave your birth in your Drs' hands too, just to be on the safe side.

I just don't think it's necessarily 'the safe side' though - the statistics don't support that view. Statistically, women and their babies are safer at birth, and in the days after birth, with a vaginal delivery. I have to admit to being very anxious too, which is why I was desperate to have a VB.

I don't mean to discourage you from a c/s if that's what you want, it's your choice and I respect that. It's just we've become so attuned to not trusting our bodies through it failing us with conceiving, that we feel that we don't have it in us to safely deliver our babies either. But it's not necessarily true.

However, if you decide on a c/s because it makes you more confident about your birth, though, then I wish you well.

Hi my first pregnancy was c-section due to pre- eclampsia and other problems but i loved the fact that it was calm - not a emergency c-section (was scheduled for a date).

My second child i was given the option of VBAC but i declined and opted for C-section purely because i knew what the experience would be like and also that i knew my baby would be safe. I don't see the point of being in labor for many hours and then having to be rushed into theater for a C-section or trying to pull a baby out with forceps and vacuum delivery. I am in a family with a high amount of family members having had C-sections and mostly it was pelvic related problems.

It should be every mom's choice what will work for them - in the one hand if i could have had normal birth the first time i would have opted for it but i'm glad things turned out to be fine and i really enjoyed my c-section experience. I know recovery is a bit longer but by day 2/3 i'm normally up and on the go - nothing a few pain tablets can't cure.

Wish all you ladies the best and go with what you feel is the best option for you and baby.

Nyrad - i haven't been through this, but keep in mind - pychological needs ARE medical needs. having been through the IVF rollercoaster, i can understand the mindset you're in at the moment. i have to and fro'd many times. ultimately, i want to try for a vaginal birth but i'm not opposed to a c/s if there is a need - and that need might be simply a psychogical need as this pregnancy progresses. i'm prone to anxiety and panic attacks, so if it is going to make it safer for myself and our little Gremlin, than i'll have a c/s.

i guess at this point, i really want to have some part of this that i have "control" over kwim??

make the decision based on what you feel is right. you'll have the people saying vaginal delivery is the only way. it IS the way nature intended - but it's not the ONLY way - the ONLY way for you is the way that is most comfortable you to bring your baby into the world

Hi Nyrad, welcome to BB :)

My experience... My DD was born via emergency c/s after being in labour for quite a while, pushing for 2 hours and her being stuck.

It took us about 6 years to conceive #2, and on our first round of IVF luckily enough.

My OB said I would have a c/s again. when we arrived at the hospital for my scheduled c/s, my OB checked me over as I was in pain, and found me to be already 8cms dilated. I still went for a c/s, but I was absolutely terrified of having a spinal, and after chatting with our anaethetist, I ended up having a GA. Part of me wishes I had been awake, but emotionally, I just don't think I would have been able to cope.

As for family ties dertermining your experience, I'm not so sure about that one.
My mum, had a 4 hour labour with me, and a 2 hour labour with my brother. they told her any more kids and she would have to park her backside at the hospital steps a couple of weeks before hand lol. So in my case, my mums experience did definately did not rub off on me in any way.

Goodluck with your decision, and the birth of your long awaited bubba :)

Nic

Nyrad & Ellie, congratulations!
I can totally understand if that is what you choose.... after such a long and stressful period of TTC, with all the uncertainty that goes with it, I think for some people planning a CS makes them feel calmer and more confident, and takes away some of the uncertainty and unpredictability around birth. If it is what makes you feel safer, more calm and comfortable, then make your choice and don't worry what anyone else thinks.

Nyrad, I think you can discount family experiences....I don't think there are ever been a link established. And honestly I would be worried before I had my bubs as my mum was in labour 32 and 28 hours respectively with my sister and I - All my labours have been between 3 - 5 hours and my sisters first came in 7. Both no drugs or stitches.

You have time to research and read up about everything - the facts, stats and the choices available to you. Make good use of BB, there is a plethora of information on here.

xoxoxoxo

Another long termer pregnant after IVF here...

For me, I'm aiming for a vaginal birth unless my doctors suggest otherwise (and I have a pro VB OB, so I know if she's suggesting it, it's warranted). Part of it comes from the fact that I'm more scared of surgery than I am of labour (I've experienced minor knee surgery and have no desire to go through major abdominal surgery), and a desire to give my body a chance to prove that there IS something that it can do right.

However, if pushing for a VB means putting myself or the Munchkin at risk - hell no. But I think that like Nic I'd be opting for the general as the fear of needles going into my spine is even greater than the fear of surgery.

I also suffer from anxiety problems (fortunately for me it has subsided significantly in pregnancy), and want to add that everyone responds to their anxiety differently and deals with it differently. The right choice for one person isn't necessarily going to be the right choice for someone else.

BW

Hi there,

I had a c/s with my DD. It was elective as I was told that I can't birth naturally. Whether I can or not, my DH and I have personally decided that we have no desire to find out, and will be having a c/s when we have another baby.

Whilst I do agree that VB is the natural way our bodies intend for us to have a baby, after all the fears I had with having a c/s, and for me, it turned out great. I have no regrets that I had a c/s and feel within myself that I wouldn't be able to phsyc myself for a VBAC. I spoke to my OB and anathesiest (sp?) about my fears, and they, along with the theatre staff, did all they could to help me through it. I also recovered really well with not too much pain. Yes I was lucky, they don't all work out so well..

GL with making your decision, do plenty of research and I am sure that you will make the right one. And remember, whatever you decide is going to be the right decison for you!!

I requested a c/section for my second child after having a long, unbearably painful, and traumatic medically-intervened birth with my first (left me with post traumatic stress). The thought of going through labour again made me want to crawl out of my own skull, and I flipped out completely when I saw the labour ward rooms at my hospital since they looked so similar to the place I'd had my first birth.

Going in the CS I was very anxious about having another brush with death, but the anaesthetist, anaes registrar, theatre midwife and even the orderly who held me forwards while they were doing the spinal injections were so reassuring and compassionate that I felt very safe and TBH after months with pelvic instability pain I was quite euphoric once the spinal took effect because it was the first time in months that I was completely pain free and comfortable. I also asked to the obstetric consultant to remain in theatre for the duration of the operation and he did, which also helped with my anxiety. They respected my birth plan involving skin to skin contact in theatre and allowed me to feed my baby in recovery, she was with me the whole time except for maybe ten minutes while I was waiting for orderlies to take me up to the ward.

Afterwards I was glowing for days, I felt so blessed and lucky to have had the birth that I wanted, even though it was a c/s I felt so empowered and powerful, and it really helped to heal my previous experience. My recovery afterwards was very slow however and I had a lingering wound infection, involved another trip to hospital and weeks of ABs. Despite that I'm really happy with the birth I chose and there is no question that I would elect to do the same again if I were ever to have another child.

I suggest you get yourself a copy of the excellent and balanced book, "Delivery by Appointment". It really will help you to make an informed decision. Good luck! :)

Thank you all for sharing your personal experiences and kind words of support. It really is not an easy decision. A part of me thinks i should just leave it to the experts to decide, but if they could predetermine who would have complications during birth and who wouldn't, there wouldn't be any need for emerg. c/s.

Marydean i will definately go get that book this week. Thanks for the tip!

I second Marydeans suggestion on getting "Delivery By Appointment" it is definately a good one to read.
I guess when it comes to birth (VB or CS) we have to try to remember that anything can happen. I had an elective cs due to my OB's recomendation because I had pre-eclampsia. I thought I'd made peace with having to have a caesar (I'd previously always thought I'd have problem free VB's, never a CS) but then for me something happened that I hadn't really bargained for. The anaesthetist could not get the epidural in so consequently I was one of the 1 in 100 people who needed a general. This to me was a real disappointment. I felt completely ripped off! I didn't have a birth experience, I didn't hear bubs first cries or even see her til she was 1.5 hours old and everyone else held her before me. One minute I was pregnant and the next minute I wake up and I'm not. There was kind of no transitional period for me. But that's just my experience.
Do what you think is going to be best for YOU emotionally. Because either way, bub will be just fine.