Registary / Courthouse Nuptials

I am sick of wedding planning on a tight arse budget
I am sick of postponing the date
I am sick of trying to work out who to include and exclude to make figures plausible

We just want to be married.

I want the fancy wedding, I do - but I don't want to have to make it a rushed and tight budgeted one either... and I want to be married. In the end I want to be able to call FutureH mine.

I don't want to be thousands in debt
I don't want to cut out half our friends and family to do it
I don't want to wait another five years to be married

A 'wedding' wouldd just be to please our rellies, and I am sick of just pleasing our rellies.


Anyway, I know at least two people on BB who have gotten married at a registary or courthouse then had the "wedding" later on. I just want to know a few things.

• Cost
• What did you wear
• Do you think it is still as special
• How did your family react
• & any other details you are willing to spill

I am tearing my hair out and the date we are hoping for draws nearer and we need to do a notice of marriage soon if we are going to go ahead with it.

TIA :heartbeat:

Just a quick reply - going out, but I'll give a longer one when we get back.

Dress, fees, license etc - less than $1000

We didn't have any money for a reception, so we said everyone could come as long as they paid for their own meals. I don't think my day was any less special - we know that only those who ACTUALLY wanted to be there came.

Be back probably tomorrow morning, feel free to PM me :)

D and I were going to get married in a registry office. The only reason we didnt was that mum was dying and we wanted her to see one of her kids married with the whole nine yards. And we could afford to do it then because she paid for most of it too.
You can wear anything you want to the registry office, you can still say your own vows etc, you can have about 20 people there, so you can have close family and friends - which means that no extended family is going to be offended because you dont have to have any there at all. All you need is yourselves, and 2 witnesses.

I think it is just as special as any other wedding, they just dont make tv shows about registry weddings! lol

There is no reason you cant have some sort of reception after the ceremony. A ****tail party is often WAY cheaper than a full sit down dinner. You can see if you know anyone who will make your cake for you, that will save you about $1000 right there too.
My flowers were really simple too, but they still cost $900 - which is pretty cheap - but the less tables you have, the less you need centre pieces (again, ****tail functions eliminate the need for big sitdown tables.) Also, having only one bridesmaid and groomsman will keep the cost down too - only buying one dress/suit and one bouquet, etc.

Anyway, I know how stressful it can be - I planned my whole wedding in 5 weeks lol - so if you need help with anything, let me know:) Good luck and hang in there - at the end of that day you will wonder what all the fuss was about and just wish you had more time to enjoy each other

A friend of mine got married at the registrar, then celebrated with friends and family that night at a nice restaurant for dinner.
She bought a semi casual white dress and had 2 bridesmaids. They did their own hair and make up, and their flowers were very simple.
They asked their guests for no presents, but for them to buy their own dinner.

They had a fantastic day. The most expensive thing for the day was the photographer, which didn't cost the earth either.

If you didn't want a restaurant setting, then you could have a celebration at the beach or in a backyard with caterers. Or you could find somewhere to have a ****tail reception.
It doesn't need to be expensive. You can either pay for meals, and guests buy their own drinks. Or guests buy their meals and you provide drinks.
Weddings can certainly be done on a budget. I wish I lived closer to you cause I love orgnanising weddings!

hey gorgeous, i assume i am one of those "two"??

please bear with me, one handed typing with baby in arm!

to answer your q's.....

• Cost - wedding registry fee was about $400, then dinner forimmediate family afterward was about another $400
• What did you wear - a green dress with pink accesories! just a dress, not a wedding dress at all
• Do you think it is still as special - hun, its your wedding day, a day you will cherish forever because you are marrying the love of your life, thats what makes it special, not the frills
• How did your family react - if you mean extended family well they understood that with a baby on the way $$ was too short to go spending on frills
• & any other details you are willing to spill

in all honesty we can both say that we are so glad of the way we did it. we hear of friends spending thouands and e just couldnt justify it - we are in love, we are married and thats what is important o us, not a pretty dress that will never be worn again.
kwim??

happy to give you any info hun, ask away :) i'll get more detailed if you like wheni have two hands!

Hey Limey thanks hun :hug:

My flowers were only going to cost $330 including postage. I had silk flowers ordered. I have already had them refunded. We were working with 40 people at most @ $30 a head and still couldn't afford it which is why we're skipping the whole 'wedding' for now. The church alone was costing $700 (because it's a basilica and i refused to have it any where else)

I just want simple and over and done with. That and I got sick of Anthony saying he didn't care what I organised but he wouldn't budge on the money issue. Now we're movving interstate so won't be able to afford the big deal anyway.

I have a wedding band and we would have enough to get FH a band no trouble I just can't be bothered with the rest of it. In fact I would be happy to have just our two closest friends as our witnesses... BUT I have no nice clothes or dresses that really fit well enough to even have nice photos of our 'real' wedding day to reflect on.

I should just stop ebing so fussy and pedantic :rolleyes: Argh I am not even making sense.

I was too slow ;)

thanks Jodi and Kitten. Yup C I was thinking of you :) Thanks for the info too.

I'll have to come back DS is crying

Ash, how much $$$ have you got to spend?

We did ours really cheaply - depending on what you want to spend for your 'wedding' it may be possible hun - I can help you with some ideas ;)

If not, you can always do what friends of ours did - just invited us around for a Sunday brunch bbq... halfway through they went & got changed, had an MC announce there was something special happening, and they hired a celebrant to arrive at the right time.

They had already asked the two witnesses - so had no bridal party.

Was VERY easy & very cruisy... but was one of the best weddings I've been to because it was just so down to earth & real IYKWIM?

We still had a wedding, but it was very toned down (difficult for everyone in the families to get their heads around... especially DHs as they are Sicilian & his is the first born son, so they were expecting something like from 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding' :lol:)
It was amazing... and very easy.
We didn't have a bridal party either, just 2 witnesses & three kids.. but you could even tone it down further than that & just have you & DP & A.... let me know if you want any ideas ;)

The bridal registry sounds like a good idea too, can't help you though cause I just don't know anything, sorry hun ;)

I am getting married on Feb 28th and we wanted something small. First it was to be a suprise in a garden. Then our option was a lovely garden in Mornington for the ceremony (costs approx. $350 incl. photos for ceremony) and we were not going to have a reception. I wanted a dress for me and DD, suit for DF, simple flowers and a celebrant. (no bridesmaids etc. just us and DD) I was to invite 11 people. Parents, Grandparents, Siblings and Neices/Nephews.

My cousin then sent out engagement party invites for the date of our wedding (she didn't know as it was still a suprise) and it was the only day they had free for the garden until March.
Now... we are having a bush wedding in my Aunties LARGE yard, ceremony as above and a reception of a spit roast and desserts. I plan to have only 2 tables (for the elderly and pregnant etc) and some picnic rugs, I want it to be a casual affair and for everyone to interact which I do not believe will happen if they are 'allocated a chair'. We plan to spend under $2000- and we now have 50ish people coming as we included Aunties/Uncles/Cousins.

Sorry for the long post just thought I would throw out some ideas.

Good Luck with your plans! It is hard to remember it is about 'you' not your rellies etc.

Deanne.

A - we had the bigger wedding because we could afford it at the time - BUT, due to extended family issues, we spoke to our celebrant about doing a private ceremony in advance. all it was going to cost was her fee (about 300 i think) and the registration of intent to marry (which i think was 50) - all we had to do was show up with two witnesses. maybe that's something to think about. just take two friends, and go and get married! there is no need to do a big wedding at all - it's personal choice

family will whinge - no matter what you do - but the important thing to remember is that this is about YOU - no one elses opinion means anything at all! as long as you are happy (well, you and your hubby to be!).

as to what to wear - if you're not going the big wedding, find something nice that you like - it doesn't have to be "gown"ish - you could go a skirt and top or a simple dress - find something you love hun. don't let the traditional expectations take over!

ultimately, your venue and how you're dressed won't change anything - gazing into your partners eyes and declaring your love and commitment will be what you remember for always. i can't remember much of the whirlwind that was our wedding day - but i can close my eyes and picture DH's face when i said i'd be with him forever, i can remember the tears in his eyes when i declared the same to him - THAT is the stuff your memories will be made of

and if you can do all of that and still have a few bucks left from your budget - throw a bbq, invite everyone to BYO, get people to help with salads etc - and party! but if you can't afford that - simply go out with your DH, and share a special dinner with him...

Ash,

BG's first paragraph in her post reminded me that my mum & stepdads best friends got married this time last year - they went away for the weekend (Mum, Stepdad, bride & groom) - and had organised a celebrant in the area.

They went down to the beach that morning & said their vows with my parents as witnesses.... and afterwards the 4 of them went out for lunch at a nearby winery.

The groom wore a nice shirt & jeans rolled up, the bride wore a really nice 3/4 skirt & nice top... no shoes - easy ;)
(And Mum said it was perfect :D)

we went to fiji
all up cost us 3grand and we got honeymoon, wedding and weeks fooda nd drink included that included 2 kids adn teh flights and the dress and photographer.

Ash I reckon go for it! Its clear you and Ant love one another and personally Im more into the small wedding as its more intimate. I always said if I got married Id go to Sunnygirl to get my dress and white was not important. Make it YOUR day, have it as laidback as YOU BOTH want it and bugger anyone else. They want a big thing, THEY can pay for it. Sorry sounds a tad aggressive but make yourself happy darl you deserve it

There are plenty of gorgeous dresses out their that are relatively cheap. Shop around, even look at op shops, you'd be surprised what you'd find there.

rhyb - I got my bridesmaids' dresses at sunnygirl, and they were gorgeous! They have some beautiful dresses there.

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Ash, how much $$$ have you got to spend?

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Nada...
We were looking at max $5k but now we're moving interstate in three weeks so we have nothing. Whatever we spend is what we can manage to save between now and Feb 18th. Which on no jobs is going to be sweet F/A... however MIL has already said she would pay for it if it's what we want because in trade for our wedding moving closer to them means she gets to see her grandson ;) :lol:

& yah BG & I will be Anni Twins (IIRC?) :lol:

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all it was going to cost was her fee (about 300 i think) and the registration of intent to marry (which i think was 50) - all we had to do was show up with two witnesses. maybe that's something to think about. just take two friends, and go and get married!
...
you could go a skirt and top or a simple dress - find something you love hun. don't let the traditional expectations take over!
...
ultimately, your venue and how you're dressed won't change anything - gazing into your partners eyes and declaring your love and commitment will be what you remember for always. i can't remember much of the whirlwind that was our wedding day - but i can close my eyes and picture DH's face when i said i'd be with him forever, i can remember the tears in his eyes when i declared the same to him - THAT is the stuff your memories will be made of

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Do you know where you get the registration of intent to marry from / how do go about it?

I'm half considering just getting something totally me because it would suit. Anth said he wants to hear 'Ashley' by Escape The Fate while we sign ;) so it seems fitting that I could just dress up in my lace up leather boots, some colourful tights... etc. And just be me, us, together.

We thought about going down to W'gong because that's the closest RBDM to where we will be living so we were going to have a picnic on the beach afterwards.

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Ash I reckon go for it! Its clear you and Ant love one another and personally Im more into the small wedding as its more intimate. I always said if I got married Id go to Sunnygirl to get my dress and white was not important. Make it YOUR day, have it as laidback as YOU BOTH want it and bugger anyone else. They want a big thing, THEY can pay for it. Sorry sounds a tad aggressive but make yourself happy darl you deserve it

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Thanks Rhy, I miss you hun :hug:


Does anyone know with regards to renewing your vows - can they be renewd in a church? It's the only thing putting me off. I desperately wanted to get married in the Catholic Church I was baptised in - so I would like to do our 'fancy wedding' as a vowel renewal when we are able to... just want to know if id still be able to do it at st. mary's.

Ash darl, i dont know any of the finer details that you're after, but i reckon do whatever the hell you wanna do, wear what you want, party however you want, at the end of the day, its about getting married to the man you love!!

wear whatever you feel comfy in, get a friend to take pics on a digital camera, have someone else with a video camera (if you want) throw a bbq and relax and enjoy yourself!!

gee, ive almost talked myself into doing that for us ;) not that we're even engaged yet lol

hun, i'm not sure - if you're moving in three weeks, you'll need to arrange it in NSW not vic - which is going to be a logistical nightmare if you're down here - maybe contact births deaths and marriages NSW and check it out. i would be contacting a celebrant in the area you're going to and arranging something there - that way you don't have to travel. perhaps you can exchange vows in yass (i vaguely recall you saying that was where you were going) and head into canberra for a fancy dinner - or maybe even go into canberra... i might be wrong though - i'm pg and have lost my brain!

definitely get onto it next week though - you need to know how to lodge it all. ours was done through the celebrant about 6 weeks before we got hitched (very early Jan from memory) - she got us to fill it out and took the money and sent it off. we had an awesome celebrant though - someone i've known for years kwim?

i don't know if you can renew your vows in a church - i think it would be up to the priest at the time. i can't see why you wouldn't be able to - essentially you're paying the church for a service...

Hunny, I havent read all the past posts, but why don't you have a river cruise? Or similar....

You just hire the celebrant, and everyone else can pay for their dinner?

Do it interstate!! We got married in NT and only had our parents andour one sibling each with a few friends who were local. It was beautiful, we used a celebrant in the park , can't remember the cost sorry then walked across the road to a big hotel and had a buffet meal in a seperate part of the dining room. Guests paid for their own alcohol. Mum made my dress cause I was 5 months pg! A lady at work's friend made the cake for $50, my brother is a wedding photography so we were lucky we got fantatsic photos free!
I am in Sydney and on school holidays so if you need anyone to do any phoning or enquiring for you I would LOVE to!! I can ask my brother questions too since he is in the business, although he is wayyy too expensive for nayone on a budget LOL

Yup to Yass we go

Might have to make some phone calls on monday... wish i had a job already though.

What bad timing with a move and wanting to get married around the same time. :wall:

Id still be interested in heading down to Wollongong but i guess i need to find out some other info first.

if you get the licence in nsw won't matter who marries you hun! or where!

there are some awesom places in ACT though - i would love to have exchanged vows at top of Mount Ainslie = the view is awesome up there!

I did our whole wedding on a budget of $5,000

We hired out a community hall from the local council, and they let us go in late late on the friday night at set up all the tables and stuff ready to go. We did the ceremony there, and gave a friend of mine insturctions when we went to have photos done, to pull out all the tables and had the reception there too.

We used friends for alot of stuff - hubby is heavily into cars and his best man owned a 55 chevy - hello wedding car! and a good friend of mine was a good photographer - not professional but they look fantastic and he only cost me a slab of beer.

We had a catering company come in and do a 3 course meal for $15 a head and they did the dishes afterwards!!

We hired a juke box instead of having a band - it had the same affect and we didnt have to feed the juke box like you traditionally do with a band.

We bought all the alcohol at Dan Murphys liqour super store when it was all on special, I even went into well known bottle stores, picked out expensive wines and asked the person behind the counter what tastes just like it but is cheap as, then bought it in boxes of 12 - each bottle only cost $3 but tasted like it was $30.

I used E-BAY for EVERYTHING!! found a couple who do wedding invites - we picked the design and they printed them up $2 each including the envelopes. I found a listing on e-bay for a wedding store that went into liqidation and needed to get rid of all their stock, I paid $1 each for my black organza chair sashes and 50c for the organza bags and filled them with lollies from the darell lee's factory seconds store as the gifts to guests.

Got my dress off e-bay for $60... brand new still with tags and original price tage ($650) off a lady who bought it but found out she was pregnant and was going to be 7 months by the wedding and couldnt wear it but needed to sell it asap to buy baby clothes!!

The cheese cake shop did our 3 teir wedding cake - carmel mud with caramel icing, for $150.

So it can be done, it takes alot of research though. If you want some help just let me know :)

ash, all you need to do in nsw is hand in your intent to marry form one month before you do so.... if you are moving, why dont you organise a celebrant to meet you at a lovely spot along the coast? if you are going past wollongong (where are you moving to?) check our Mount Keira - such beautiul lookouts, you and two witnesses in the rainforest irst thing in the dewey mornong! ah so special!!

then you can have the party later down the track, when you have the $$. bright side - you will get two dresses that you can wear again, instead of one that you will never use again! :D

the celebrant will organise the intent to marry form for you and file it too.
there is a celebrant website that is like a registry - has a whole bunch of celebrants from all over the country, lists what services they offer, whenre they are prepared to travel, etc. Something like 'celebrant-e" dot com.
If you do go the registry route, you will need to do it yourself. you can print the form from online, and you need to submit it (in vic) one month and one day before the intended ceremony. You will need full original birth certificates (not extracts or photocopies) and ID to lodge the form.

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then you can have the party later down the track, when you have the $$. bright side - you will get two dresses that you can wear again, instead of one that you will never use again! :D

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but i still want the dress i will never wear again!!

i jusdt talked to anth again and he has changed his mind. whats the point of getting married when the way we do it wont make him happy.
looks like im waiting until we can afford it, which given we are roughly $6000 in debt due to the move is going to be a long freaking time

HI
Just an idea as an alternative.
Our wedding and honeymoon cost under $3000 and we had 150 guests.
Keep in mind that our wedding was in '99, so prices will have gone up somewhat, but the biggest cost we avoided was for catering. Even if catering has increased significantly it wouldn't affect the cost to you if you get your guests to pay for their own meal as we did.

Dress - $170 made by a friend, bought material and pattern from Spotlight - looked great!
Flowers - Only had a bouquet for me and one bridesmaid - paid for by a friend but only cost around $50 anyway, artificial flowers. looked great.
Cake - Didn't bother
[B]Bridesmaids dress - paid for her own
Celebrant - $80
Reception - Cost $400 to hire the Ballroom at Noahs on the beach - Newcastle - gorgeous venue. Had the wedding on a Sunday so it was cheaper! Included overnight stay in a spa room.
Food- asked guests to pay for own meals instead of buying us a present. $32 per head for a 3 course meal.
Alcohol - only supplied soft drink and non alcoholic wine, but the bar was open for guests to purchase their own drinks if required.
Music - Hired a jukebox - can't remember the cost but not very much
Honeymoon - 4 days on a houseboat on the Myall Lakes - under $500
There were other expenses such as suit hire and some table decorations, I did the invitations on my computer so only paid for the paper from office works. Cars were borrowed from a friend. Photos and video also by a friend who was learning photography.

Our wedding was beautiful. I don't feel that I missed out on my special day in anyway. The reception centre was just lovely and the meal was great. By asking our friends to pay for their own meal we probably saved thousands and could invite everyone we wanted to.This was actually part of the deal with Noahs, we got the reception room at a cheaper rate but we had to fill it with 150 paying customers. Maybe think about having your wedding on a Sunday or weekday - you will save heaps.
Hope you have a lovely wedding!
L.B.

Ash - if you want the big day, don't let it put you off that you have to wait. yeah, moving now is a PITA, and it will leave you short of money for a year or so - but why not plan in advance - maybe look at your fifth anniv of getting together (i know Feb 18 is important to you - me too!) - or look for the next time it falls on the day you got together cos then you know it will be your anniv to the day (so if it was 06, you can get married in 2012 cos that's the next time it's on a Saturday kwim?) - i know a wedding is an important and very public declaration of your love for each other - but you don't want to do something you'll be disappointed in and regret. it's possible to do the small thing, but if you plan (and start getting bits and pieces now) it's doable on a still reasonably restricted budget

FWIW - apart from "THE DRESS" which was initially going to be hand made, but ended up being an off the rack thing that i loved - and the only one i tried on - our expenses were minimal. we got spit roast catering, friend made the cake, i did all the invites myself (and they turned out fab might if i may say so myself!) - the "gift" for guests was a CD of music relevant to our relationship - which i made myself - cost maybe $2 a couple... i think all up (dress excluded) it cost us around $4000, which included $1000 over the bar, $1800 for catering (for around 115 people), gifts for everyone that helped out (bottle of wine with personalised labels), invitations etc. and was organised on a budget (DH unemployed at the time and paying mortgage/expenses on two houses for four months) from August 05 to Feb 06. it was full on, and i had to put in the hard yards on all the details myself, but it worked out really well.

if you need help with doing the "big" wedding on a budget, i'm here to help - add me on msn and ask away hun!

Firstly, you dont need to spend a bomb or get yourself into debt to have a special wedding day. Your wedding day is what you make of it. At the end of the day, its about you & your man & the love that you have for one another and your DS.

Secondly well done for not going down the whole personal loan track, to pay for a wedding. That is such a bad move, especially for a young family. You dont need to be starting married life with a debt like that over your heads. Unfortunately alot of people get trapped.

A registry wedding to me sounds absolutely beautiful. I have heard some lovely stories. We almost went down that track ourselves, as like you we just wanted to get married, we were over the planning, cost, family input & on & on... You can make it so special.

Otherwise, I'll give you a quick run down on our plans & that could give you some inspiration. We are having a backyard casual affair. Will you have a nice backyard where you are moving, or could you use the MIL's backyard? We have organised a caterer for 60 people its just under $1000. Otherwise you can so easily cater for it yourself....so so easy I just didnt want the hassle on my wedding day iykwim. After our ceremony in a park not too far from home, everyone will rock up at our joint & we've organised party hire (chairs, tables etc) & we will dance the night away lol. Apart from food and alcohol, one of our bigger expenses has been my dress.

So onto the dress, would you consider a second hand dress? Otherwise you can get a stunning dress 'off the rack' in a bridal store, this is what I did and my dress is a couture that was marked down from $2,200 to just under $1000.

We arent using a photographer. Its a huge expense and all of our family & friends have cameras, so they will take plenty for us. We have even though of buying ourselves a new camera to use on the day & at least at the end of the day we will have stacks of pics & a camera that we can use again!!

We are also making our own cupcake wedding cake.

Another idea is an afternoon tea wedding. Pick a nice location & use a celebrant (we found a beautiful park right on the river, and I have hired it for 2 hours free of charge through the local council - there are plenty of free locations around) get married, go back to someones house & provide arvo tea foods, ie cheesecake shop, tea, coffee & nibblies. By doing it this way, its small, intimate & the budget is kept down but its still a classy wedding iykwim.

Invites, I dont know if I am allowed to mention the website here so I will FB it to you, they were $60 all up & are perfect.

What date are you hoping for? I hope you can get it to all come together for you. If you need any tips please feel free to ask me here on on FB, I've done so much wedding research I am going bonkers lol. Otherwise my wedding day is March 7th so look out for my pics for inspiration & ideas!!

At the end of the day, let me just say, my parents were married in a registry office, my dad had to borrow a smart pair of pants from his mate & my mum wore a simple dress from her wardrobe, they have one shocking wedding photo lol, YET they are still together.

Oooh I am getting carried away now, but just to add, my cousin got married a month ago. She sent out invites inviting everyone to their 'engagement party', so everyone rocks up & they dissapear & get changed into their outfits & come out to surpise everyone & get married. I thought that was a wicked idea!!! This is a way to keep family out of the planning lol

I don't want a big wedding. I don't want the stress or the expense. I either want a celebrant ceremony or a courthouse wedding. I refuse to have my wedding in a church.

I am thinking about dresses, and I don't want to wear white or anything similar (no ivory, no cream, no champagne...) and I don't want a formal gown. I want a simple summery style, very casual. Its so hard to find that online that isn't designer and more than $300! We don't have any savings yet, but that doesn't matter too much as we haven't set a date yet. DD's dress is easy, I can find one online very easily. DF wants a casual wedding as he's just not into suits. His clothes will probably be casual trousers that aren't cargo, and a nice button up shirt.

I was making a list, and family on my side is 21, that's grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins as well as my parents and brother. DF has probably about 20 as well. Add on some friends, another 10 people per se, and its already 50 people. Too many for a small simple wedding. So we decided on just parents and siblings, and some close friends. All of my family are interstate, except for my uncle's family of 4 who are in another part of NSW, several hours away. I have basically given up on the list. Would I offend family by not inviting them, despite the fact they're interstate? My mother's parents are so stoic they probably won't come. Since I haven't made life decisions that they approve of, ie I had DD outside of marriage.

Flowers, well I want real flowers. I want some in my hair, and I want a small bouquet, something I can toss over my shoulder. I want bridesmaids but I don't want it to get formal. So not sure if the bridesmaids would have bouquets.

Cake, well I will either make it myself, or have FMIL do it. Getting a bakery to make one, they'll charge me a fortune. Plus I'm in a small town, there aren't many bakeries.

Invitations, not hard. I can order them online or get nice paper and do them myself.

Reception, now we want a really simple one. Probably a BBQ or buffet style dinner. Not formal at all. Chairs and tables provided (either hire, or borrow from all we know) for guests to sit down if they want, but its not a formal dinner.

Drinks, well we provide food and dry bar, BYO alcohol. Shouldn't be a problem in a country town!

Argh it all looks easy, but it isn't!

DH and I did the courthouse ceremony and we not only planned and pulled it off in under 6 weeks, but we only spent around $3000.
You can find the details on paperwork etc by googling it and finding your state's requirements, we're in QLD and all up the paperwork was around $300. You just file the 'Notice of Intention to Marry' bit with your local courthouse or whatever and that's about $275, then the marriage licence itself is another $65 or so dollars.
We just printed the Intent form, filled it out, lodged it at the courthouse and they asked us to pick a date there and then - we chose a date five weeks from that day (there's a minimum 'cooling off' period of around four weeks so we gave ourselves an extra week just to be sure we had time to put everything in place), and booked it in.
If you do it at the courthouse, they usually have special days when they perform marriages so don't worry, you won't be sitting in the lobby with a bunch of crims awaiting their turn in front of the judge!! Our court days up here are Mon, Thurs and Fri so Tues and Wed are the 'wedding' days.

You can wear whatever you want - be as formal or as casual as you like. The courthouse allows up to around 20 'guests', you can always ask if you want more people there because I'm sure they're happy to have people stand in the back (they go on how many seats they have in the particular room they use). DH and I didn't tell anybody except our parents we were getting married, our closest friends had no idea we were even engaged until we posted the wedding photos on MySpace!! So we had a total of seven guests - two parents and one sibling on each side, and my grandmother.
I bought a simple black cotton knee-length dress for $50 from a local boutique, as I was five and a half months' pregnant and wanted something I could wear again - I still wear it quite often now and it's lovely. I did my own makeup, and a friend of my mum's (who used to be a hairdresser but is now a SAHM and does friends' hair in her kitchen for a bit of pocket money) did my hair for $25. DH just wore a pair of black trousers that were his work uniform when he was in retail, a black button-down shirt, a tie that I picked up from an op shop for $1.50 (it fit with our 'colour scheme' of black, red and white) and his black Chuck Taylors. I had bought my shoes months before for a friend's 30's-themed birthday party and just wore them.

Our wedding bands cost us a little bit, DH just grabbed his out of the case and paid $140, mine was supposed to be the same price but because I wanted it in white gold and it had to be resized to fit my tiny fingers, it ended up being about $195. My engagement ring is a simple silver band with a CZ, it cost me $30 (and another $20 to get it resized).

After the 10-minute ceremony, we went around town to take some photos at some pretty locations (we have a lookout with a waterfall, and our Botanic Gardens have a lovely Japanese Teahouse and a pretty pond that looks nice in photos) and everybody just brought their own cameras to take pictures. Nothing professional, but you really don't need it unless your family are butt-senseless at taking photos - besides, you can do some amazing stuff with Photoshop and similar programs these days... It was good too because we had full control over what we wanted to do as far as posing etc, we're not the type to do all the cheesy wedding poses so all our shots are just beautiful, natural pics. Of course there were some shockers because only my dad is a professional photographer, but with six cameras aimed at us we managed to get a lot of good ones, and didn't cost us a cent bar taking the USB cards to Harvey Norman to get them printed!

We'd booked a night in a motel room to treat ourselves, get out of the house for the night, so after a quick trip home to get an overnight bag together we went to the motel and had dinner at the restaurant there. Everyone paid for their own meals and drinks (which was good because DH's parents are borderline alcos and DH's brother ordered an expensive seafood platter which he ended up eating maybe a quarter of!!), we'd ordered a slab mud cake from the Cheesecake Shop for around $75 including decorations, and that was our dessert.

We didn't have flowers, or a bridal party, or any of the trimmings that we just don't see as necessary to celebrate a marriage of two people who want to just belong to each other. It was a very fun, relaxed day with no hassles (apart from a couple of days before when my wedding ring still hadn't arrived at the jeweller's and there was a minor freakout about having it on time!! luckily it got sorted out), no *****fights, no pressure to make a big impression or impress people.. no jealousy about picking one friend over another to be in the bridal party, no extra expense of having to provide food etc for people I'm not particularly close to but felt obligated to invite (ie, we didn't invite anybody so nobody could feel left out!)... it was just DH and I, being joined together in front of our families and enjoying the day because it truly was all about US, not flowers, cakes, dresses, jewellery, or comparing our wedding to those of our friends.

I'd seriously recommend it to anybody who's on a budget or has hassles with certain friends and/or family who should be acting their age and know better than to cause trouble. Like I said, it was so much cheaper than these big weddings we see everywhere now, we didn't go into debt to put on a big show for everyone and at the end of the day, it really was just all about being married and being in love and declaring that in front of our families.

I hope that info gives you something to work with, or answers some questions you have about the whole process... if you need anything else just PM me, I'm happy to help out!

Cost - $300 (I think). We had to put down $100 to set the date. You have to give the court 30 days notice prior to getting married.

What did you wear - A $30 dress I bought the day before!! It was a pearl colour and I wore it with a dusty pink wrap and a matching necklace. I wore little kitten heels.

Do you think it is still as special - We don't clasify this date as our real wedding date. We had our symbloic ceremony 3 weeks later in the Greek Islands which we call our wedding date. Getting married at the court house was just legally easier. DH and I both had our Hens/Bucks parties the night before so we were feeling a bit seedy. It was lovely though - short a sweet.

How did your family react - A lot of people were glad to be able to see us get married at the court house because most of those that came couldn't make it over to Greece for our big wedding.

& any other details you are willing to spill - You will have a meeting with the registrar of the court (I think that's what he was called) and they will ask you a few questions and help you pick a date. Ours was in between bail hearings :rolleyes:. It was special in it's own way - we giggled the whole way through and there were no nerves. It's much more relaxing when there isn't a big production. Three weeks later at our "big" wedding I was a nervous wreck - and I was already married!! We didn't tell any of our guests in the Greek Islands that we were already married - we didn't want to spoil it for them! We had our official marriage certificate from the courthouse displayed in a cute little canister on our cake table at our "big" wedding.

Your weddings sound perfect. I think I have decided to not have a bridal party, just guests, I'd probably have my close friend take my flowers, and DF can have his mate hand him the rings, or he could have the rings himself. I've decided on plain wedding bands, that's enough. My engagement ring is four figures, so that's plenty! I think we could have the reception at a restaurant or one of the really good pubs in town, and have everyone pay their own. Not sure yet. The date isn't set until December, but January or February is more likely. I'm trying to spread things out over time so its not a mad dash. We'll see how that turns out later!

Hey I may be a little late but DH and I got married in the Reg office in Mebourne which is in the old treasury building looked just as good as a chruch and we still had 50 people there. It took about half an hour and then we had our friends join us for dinner as a pressie. Also we had a good photo deal with Kate Ramsey Google her she is amazing.

PM me if you want more details

Hi cookiemonster,

Just discovered this too and I know exactly how you feel. We got married in rush in registry, it was organised within a week. Booked Tuesday, squeezed in for Sat arvo left o/s Sunday. The registry was nice but I wouldn't recommend quite the rush. Anyway every since we've been planning the real day and its all such a fuss.

Anyway... you asked about renewals in a church later on. We're planning to do this... one day. They're called "blessing ceremonies" and its all the bells and whistles minus paperwork. I have looked at several denominations and most say that they have a requirement of having at least one person bride or groom must have been baptised in a Christian religion. So don't feel you can't approach any church.

Another suggestion we had was to just organise a big picnic in botanical gardens, I love the idea but dh has his heart set on feeding people. One day...

My parents renewed their vows in our local Church when I was younger. They did all the bells and whistles, reception being at home for anyone who wanted to come. There was a simple slab cake and nibblies everywhere. Their wedding was in Dad's parents' backyard, very simple. I guess like what I want, but except I won't be wearing the fancy dress.

Hi there, haven't read all the posts but let me tell you DH & I got married at the registry office and I was still a blubbering mess! It was still personal and special and just beautiful, even if it was in the CBD in an office building! I don't remember looking outside, only into DH's eyes!

We had a party at our place the next day which was our 'engagement' party....or so people thought (except for those special ones that were at the ceremony.....maybe about 10 people, most family)....and we told everyone at the speeches we'd got married the day before. Some people were shocked, but most happy. Then everyone just stuffed their faces with food and that's that!

It was great! (well good enough for a 36week pregnant lady anyway!)

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Hi there, haven't read all the posts but let me tell you DH & I got married at the registry office and I was still a blubbering mess!

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Haha my DH and I could barely contain our laughter... it just felt so absurd to be standing in front of just our immediate family and one stranger (the JP) and doing the whole, 'I take you Simon to be my lawfully wedded husband'... hahaha... DH of course managed to slip in our little joke about my name, my birth cert says Donna-Lee but even my parents don't call me that anymore, I've always hated it, but of course the JP didn't know that so when she asked DH to repeat after her, she said my full name, he was like, 'I take you, Donna-LEE...' and it was just about all we could do to not start rolling around on the floor laughing... The JP was giving us that look, like, smiling like she knows there's a joke but she's obviously missed it, it was so funny!!

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A - we had the bigger wedding because we could afford it at the time - BUT, due to extended family issues, we spoke to our celebrant about doing a private ceremony in advance. all it was going to cost was her fee (about 300 i think) and the registration of intent to marry (which i think was 50) - all we had to do was show up with two witnesses. maybe that's something to think about. just take two friends, and go and get married! there is no need to do a big wedding at all - it's personal choice

family will whinge - no matter what you do - but the important thing to remember is that this is about YOU - no one elses opinion means anything at all! as long as you are happy (well, you and your hubby to be!).

as to what to wear - if you're not going the big wedding, find something nice that you like - it doesn't have to be "gown"ish - you could go a skirt and top or a simple dress - find something you love hun. don't let the traditional expectations take over!

ultimately, your venue and how you're dressed won't change anything - gazing into your partners eyes and declaring your love and commitment will be what you remember for always. i can't remember much of the whirlwind that was our wedding day - but i can close my eyes and picture DH's face when i said i'd be with him forever, i can remember the tears in his eyes when i declared the same to him - THAT is the stuff your memories will be made of

and if you can do all of that and still have a few bucks left from your budget - throw a bbq, invite everyone to BYO, get people to help with salads etc - and party! but if you can't afford that - simply go out with your DH, and share a special dinner with him...

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I would like to know which kind of wine has been afforded on wedding party.I hope you guys enjoyed a lot.Thanks for sharing.

Getting married was a bit of a last minute decision for us so we slapped together a wedding in about a month :lol: we are living proof that weddings do not take years to plan!

We decided on a registry wedding as neither of us is particularly religious so it seemed silly to get married in a church but were too lazy to organise a garden/beach sort of affair...registry appealed to us as they organised the room, flowers, celebrant etc
We are very laid back, low key people, so liked the idea of a small relaxed registry ceremony then a ****tail party at one of our favourite bars afterwards. A starchy do with cars, $100 per head pricetags, white dresses and BIG cakes is certainly not us.

I never really liked the idea of a registry wedding before i started planning our wedding because i was thought the venue would be like a office, all the couples sitting in a waiting room, waiting for their number to be called like when you go to vic roads or something haha but the one in Melbourne is in the old treasury building which is really quite nice. All dark wood and leather.

So to answer your questions...
It cost $250 all up, but we splashed out a bit for the reception that cost about $3500. I wore my mum's wedding sari (i'm half Indian) which was really lovely. I still think it was just as special as any other wedding, we invited family and close friends only. It was very "us" which was very important to me..I didn't want one of those cookie cutter weddings at the chapel/reception centre with mediocre food and so so decor. Our families were fine with it and so many of our friends have commented on how much they enjoyed our wedding. At the end of the day you just have to do what you and your partner want, because it's YOUR special day. Nobody else is going to remember it for the rest of their lives, they're just coming to eat some food and for the free booze hahaha