Ears that stick out???

DDs ears stick out. If you put your fingers behind them and try to push them forward, you can't, they are at permanent right angles to her head... and she is almost totally bald. DH doesn't like her sticky-outie ears at all, he is sort of paranoid/obsessed about them, I think they're cute and I'm not at all worried. He wants them pinned back ASAP, I think he's being completely, utterly ridiculous. When we saw the pediatrician for her four week check I asked him about them and he suggested we wait until she has hair before making any decisions.

Any comments? Anyone been through this? Am I being ridiculous or is my DH?

ETA: my ticker photo doesn't really capture her in full ear sticking glory, I'll see if I can change it to a more recent one.
ETA: changed the pic, this is the best eary one I could find.

I have seem some babies with real wing nuts ;) and she really doesn't look that bad. She will look different once she has hair though and you wont notice it as much. Plus once she grows into herself they might not look like they stick out at all.

I was looking at your ticker just a day ago thinking that she was utterly gorgeous. I don't think you need to worry about her ears now. Wait until she's older and has some hair before doing something so drastic.
One of my friends was the same as your DH. She always had hats and beanies on her daughter to cover her ears and make them sit flat. Now she's a gorgeous little girl and TBH I haven't ever noticed her ears and I doubt I ever would have if her mother hadn't mentioned them.

ETA - LOL at wingnuts. I haven't heard that in years. No, they're definitely not wingnuts.

LOL Dach, it's a family trait on my Dads side to have humungous ears that stick way out and it's always one of the first things Nan ever asked about the new babies in the family ROFL - "does he/she have the ears?"

We took Lachlan to the pediatrician at a few months of age as one of his ears has very minimal cartilage so it flaps around everywhere, his ear also did not have any shape to it (the lobe was actually just flat no ridge on top)
His recommendation was to leave it for now and see how it goes, his ear now has shape but it still has no hard cartilage in it. So his ear either sticks right out or gets curled up.
Lachlan has a fair bit of hair , basically we where told to leave it till he was older.

My DD has sticky out ears too.

I'm just waiting for her to grow hair so we can cover them up. If you are looking at her, you can see the sun shining through her ears.. LOL

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LOL Dach, it's a family trait on my Dads side to have humungous ears that stick way out and it's always one of the first things Nan ever asked about the new babies in the family ROFL - "does he/she have the ears?"

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Same in my family - and DS has them ;) I think they are cute and the men in my family with the ears are gorgeous men who grow into them beautifully.

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My DD has sticky out ears too.

I'm just waiting for her to grow hair so we can cover them up. If you are looking at her, you can see the sun shining through her ears.. LOL

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My DD has one ear a lot more sticky-outy than the other but I have noticed the gorgeous golden glow of sun beaming through hers also. They are a little bit pointy on top too :)

I love them. I never noticed my dad has them too till someone pointed out that she has his ears. She has hair, not enough to cover them up but enough to disguise them and no-one has mentioned them in months now. I couldnt care less and wont do anything unless she starts asking for it in school. They are lovely and I like to kiss them (and if I'm honest, I give them a little suck every now and again if I can :lol:)

Both my babies have sticky out ears, Jayden has kinda grown into his now but they still stick out a little, but Ashlea's are still out there. I used to put headbands on her when she was younger, not only to keep her ears back but because they looked gorgeous on her. I wouldn't worry about, your DD is still absolutely gorgeous!

DD2's stick out a little too, mainly at the tops not the whole ear if that makes sense!

Thanks so much everyone. So the overwhelming consensus is that DH is being silly and I am right, it's nothing to worry about, she'll grow into them/hair will cover them, and it's even cute! Just as I thought, sorry DH :p

:lol: Mel, sun shining through, yep we get that too.

Brontide, thank you so much for your lovely compliment. I'm sure you know too, there's nothing that makes a Mum feel more warm and fuzzy than beautiful words about their children. *mwah*

I changed my ticker pic and here is another one in the gallery https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...4&ppuser=10122

Rach can I just say that Harriet is completely adorable :)
DH is being silly!

we joke that the only bit of DD that looks like daddy are the big ears, although they arnt really sticking out much.
My sister always had rather prominent ears when she was a baby, now she is 13, has beautifull ears and is gorgeous, although she doesnt wear her hair pulled back to tight or they do look a little large still!! like everyone else said, leave it till she is older, and my mum always made sure no one mentioned the ears to my sister, the worst thing that could have happened was for her to become consious of them as she grew up!! then it WOULD have been an issue!

I think they look like she will grow into them as they aren't too sticky outy. My cousin had ears that stuck out and so did his daughter - they both got them pinned back when she was 16.

Just bumming this way, way, way old thread ‘cos DH is still banging on about DD’s ears. :wall:

This is the conversation that we always have (and I’m way, way, way paraphrasing).

DH: We need to do something about DD's ears.
Me: They’re fine, there’s nothing wrong with them, I think they’re cute and they give her character.
DH: But she’ll get teased and become emotionally scarred. It’s our responsibility as parents to look after her, protect her and do the best for her. We should do something about her ears sooner rather than later.
Me: Kids will get teased about anything and our DD is no teasing target, she’s feisty little punk and she’ll take on anyone.
DH: I disagree.
Me: Well she’s due for her 3 year bluebook check soon so you can come to the appointment too and raise your concerns (with our GP who is also a paediatrician who DH thinks is excellent and is just totally lovely and will completely agree with me! :lol: ).
DH: Yes, I will that’s a good idea.

Comments? Specifically about her ears. https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...mg-1558-large/

Aw, Ep she's adorable!! Completely gorgeous!! I think her ears will be fine once she gets older and has more hair. Maybe her head will grow a bit more (not that she has a small head... this is coming out wrong!!) and her ears won't. I think they're fine!!
Beautiful beautiful girl.

OMG she is so cute!! That photo is just wonderful.

She does have large ears but they don't detract from her appearance at all.

I think that in your place I ask DH to weigh up the emotional pain of knowing that your parents have issues with your ears v's the possibility that she might get teased about them.

I certainly don't think there is any pressing need to do anything other than wait and see.

OMG they're cute!!!!! She's adorable!! No, I say leave them alone! She would look totally different if you changed them and they really suit her. She's beautiful. Tell your DH to relax, this is her, and she is gorgeous.

She's adorable.

How about waiting to see if they are an issue for her? She may not get teased. She may get teased and learn how to deal with it. Or she may ask for something to be done herself.

I had severely buck teeth as a child which I was teased about. I eventually had a lot of orthodontic surgery as an adult to correct my jaw, but it was something I physically needed doing. My confidence improved once it was done and my profile changed and I no longer hid my face in my hands. I could also properly eat thing I hadn't been able to previously.

I don't have issues with cosmetic correction. I do think if you focus on an imagined flaw, you can create a problem where there may not be one. Right now, does Harriet have a problem with her ears? If not, I'd say leave them alone. She gloriously beautiful as she is.

ETA - was your DH teased as a child? Or teased others? I ask because I think if you were badly teased as a child, then you are very conscious of protecting your baby from that happening to them. I do think being able to handle teasing is a confidence thing. If you dont care what people say about you, life is so much easier.

What a gorgeous little girl!

Epacris, she does have quite prominent ears. Personally, I'd be inclined to leave them be until (if) she starts to complain about them herself. But if your DH is concerned, I don't think there is any harm in having a consultation with a plastic surgeon to discuss the procedure (ahhhh... I can't remember the name!!) oh... otoplasty??? Anyway, why don't you all go see a plastic surgeon (get a personal recommendation if you can) and get his/her opinion on a) whether the procedure 'needs' to be done and b) what age is best to do it, if you decide that you want to.

I think she looks quite perfect just the way she is!

What if you get it done and she hates it? You can't reverse it. I think it's like any other enhancing surgery - wait until she is old enough to decide what she wants to do with her body. They are her ears after all. Maybe suggets to your DH that it is your job as parents to love her just the way she is and help her also love herself in that way. IF she has an issue with her ear when she gets older then start to discuss the prospect of surgery. I personally don't think it is your job as parents to protect her from the world but to teach her and enable her to deal with the world in her own way.

She isso sweet and if they were pinned back most likely kids been kids will find something else to tease about you cant escape teasing unless you are the bully

Honestly, I think she looks gorgeous and they're just ears. Ear pinning is plastic surgery, remember, would you get her nose sculpted if it was a bit big?

I personally think it's the quirks that make us interesting. Think about Jennifer grey (dirty dancing). She had plastic surgery on her nose and lost what made her stand out in Hollywood. She says she has regretted it ever since.


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Jude 07/10/2008 | Lilac 16/06/2011

my dh has sticky out ears as a kid, really bad, thought my son might get them but they dont stick out anywhere near as much as his dads. but my dh has grown into them and i dont think they look that big or stick out. his brother still goes on about them but hey i think they have to pick at something. but they were definately worse when he was a kid. and he has a crew cut now. so dont despair. she is still young enough for things to change a lot.

on another note i think she is absolutely gorgeous and that they add to her character. honestly they arent that bad. she is a little cutey and looks like a happy child so why change that. wait until she decides what she wants done.

I was a kid with a sticky out ear. To be honest as a small kid I didn't know or care, but by about the age of 8 though I hated it. I begged my dad for 5 years to have it pinned back before he finally agreed. I was so happy with how it turned out. The actual surgery wasn't too bad but as a kid that had never had anything like that done before It seemed painful.

Honestly I would leave it for now and if she mentions it in the future that she wants it done then I would let her get it done. But before that I wouldn't bother. I do agree with your DH though that it can be emotionally scarring. I was teased - mostly by my siblings and it's still a sore point with me.
That's my opinion anyway.

I would be suggesting DH sit down and talk about his own demons that are causing these fears, because she is gorgeous ;) But that's the just me... always wanting to talk everything out ;)

Like others if she asks or is upset by it then you can do something, until then I wouldn't worry xx

To me it looks like she will grow into them. Unless there is a medical reason to do so, I would leave them alone.

Epacris, your DH needs to get over the idea that she doesn't look as good as she should. She's a wonderful little girl and her appearance (which is completely adorable, not that that's the point) is only part of the package.

Does he really think he's gotten to where he is today because of his dashing good looks? ;) Or that he was held back in life somehow because of the way he looked?

Teaching any child, particularly a girl in our society, that they should be concerned about something that is a natural feature (and not in any way impeding them physically) at such a young age has much bigger repercussions than what a few shallow children in the school ground tease her about! And btw, i think your DD is pretty self-assured and sociable and can't see her being picked on any more than the kid whose ears are any different.

And I would also tell him not to talk about her like this when she's around. She's a smart kid and she'll know Daddy thinks her ears don't look 'perfect' (even though they're perfect for her).

For some reason my DP has this thing about whether our next DD won't look as 'pretty' as DD1. Maybe it's a male thing, wanting his daughter to have an easy time and seeing appearance as something that helps that?

Awesome post Jen. :clap:

Thank you all so much for your extremely well considered replies. You have given me lots to think about and talk about with DH.

Charlotte- I know exactly what you mean about her head growing into her ears. I look at baby photos of me and my ears were huge compared to the size of my head. My ears are still large but they fit my head much better now. Mine don’t stick out as much as her’s do though. :lol:

Onyx – Thanks. :D

Heaven – She is such an imp, so yes, I think they suit her too.

L&B – I don’t know if DH was bullied as a child. I assume not, but maybe I should specifically ask him and ask if anything he has experienced is clouding his judgement about DD’s ears. I too don’t have any problems with cosmetic correction. If it was a prominent, unusual/abnormal mark or growth I think that would be different. But they’re her ears and IMO they still well within the realms of normal. She definitely doesn’t have a problem with them at all, she is totally unaware of them being anything other than just her ears. Thanks for sharing your experience. :hug:

Nickel – thanks for that suggestion. I think we’ll start with our GP (who is also a paediatrician). DD has her 3 year bluebook check coming up soon. I’m sure we’ll all be able to have a good chat about the whole thing.

Nai – Yes, I totally agree, what if she thinks we took it upon ourselves to change her character (and not for the better). And I totally agree with your outlook on parenting too, but there just seems to be something about DH wanting to “protect” DD. I actually think our DS1 is more emotionally fragile and that he is more in need of our protection and refuge. DD can more than hold her own with anyone.

Aligater – Thanks. :D But Hmmm.... I think bullies have their own issues (that also need addressing) don’t they. Life can be a hard road for bullies (and their parents) too.

Kuraiza – That is a very interesting point about Jennifer Grey (I remember her well) and her nose.

Bskilner – Thanks. :D

BubbaT – Thanks so much for sharing your personal experience of this. I’m so sorry that you still feel hurt. Could you talk to your siblings about how you feel? :hug: Do you think that aspect of your experience could have been “managed” better by your parents or others?

Rouge – Thanks. :D

FJ – Thanks. :D

Jen – Ahh what a great post and great advice. I’m LOLing at my DH’s dashing good looks getting him to where he is today. And I really appreciate the point you make about little girls and beauty in our society. And I’m sure your DD2 will be just as pretty as your DD1.... and in her own unique way.

Hey hun, I think she's adorable and your DH is paranoid! Our DS has daddy's ears which are huge but soooooooo cute I would never touch them :)

He also has two toes next to his big toe (on both feet) that are slightly webbed (not all the way, just half way) . I noticed this straight away when he was born, but the doc said it's genetic and someone in the family would have had them, and that it won't cause him any probs. My DF is worried that he'll get picked on at school (I don't think it's THAT bad) but I just can't stand the thought of him having the op. on both his feet just to separate his toes. If he grows up paranoid or not liking them, we can give him the option to fix it I guess......

I would never have noticed that you had bigger than average ears!!

Makes it even less of an issue!

Miss b. My sister has those same toes. She's never had any problems in life. No one notices.

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Jude 07/10/2008 | Lilac 16/06/2011

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BubbaT – Thanks so much for sharing your personal experience of this. I’m so sorry that you still feel hurt. Could you talk to your siblings about how you feel? :hug: Do you think that aspect of your experience could have been “managed” better by your parents or others?

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Thanks, It's not something that I would bring up with my siblings now. I honestly don't think it could have been managed better in our case, thats not to say it couldn't be done.

My sister has lived all her life hating her sticky out ears, would never wear her hair out and then when her DD2 was born and had the same ears she vowed she wouldn't see her go through the same thing. At age 7-8 she had them pinned, day procedure and all went beautifully. They were also able to claim alot on Medicare. Niece is now 16 and I don't think she even thinks about but my sister is glad she did it at a young age.

Good luck deciding what to do, it is so hard with littlelies and wanting to protect them from hurt and teasing. xoxox

She is gorgeous! And I say only if they become an issue for her do something about it but for now they're fine and she is cute!

I think shes just beautiful the way she is. They are similar to my ears.... yeah I did get a bit of teasing from siblings but, I got through it. It should be her choice as to what she wants done with them, so waiting til shes old enough to see if it is an issue is probably best.

I had ears that stuck out when I was a child and I never noticed them until I got to grade 3 and the other kids started picking on me. I never told my parents because I did not know that anything could be done about them, all I did was stop wearing my hair up.

When I got to 13 I watched a program that showed a person getting otoplasty and I wanted it BADLY! My parents booked us in to see a plastic surgeon but freaked out after the consult so I never got it done. I went through high school trying to find different ways to hide my ears, and at one stage even used super glue to stick them to my head so I could wear my hair up. This stopped after the skin behind my ears started peeling off when I removed the glue.

When I turned 24 I finally organized for the surgery myself and have never been happier.

In the end, my parents did what they thought was best for me as they didnt see my concerns as being valid. To them I was perfect and they didn't understand what damage a few kids name calling could do.

Now, with my own daughter, I am going to keep an eye on her ears so that what happened to me doesn't happen to her. I will not put her through surgury just for the sake of it, but if she ever asks it will be considered.

Because of the (possible) psychological impact of having "bat ears", otoplasty is coved by Medicare and if you have private health insurance they will cover the hospital stay and any gaps.

She is a beautiful girl!!! I really don't think you can do anything now and her face will change as will her hairstyle as to how it sits around her ears, etc, etc. My sister had one sticky out ear and was very conscious of it (it runs in our family), when she was 18 she had it pinned back. Until then she would refuse to wear her hair in a ponytail. I just think it is a wait and see thing and really a decision that your little girl needs to make herself when she is older and has stopped growing, you never know how things will work out. kids get teased about anything and everything and it is part of life, I used to wear glasses and got teased about that, also got teased about being too skinny and ....well, lots of things really, I guess what I am saying is, if it isn't one thing it is something else when your a kid, part and parcel and all that. Anyway, after all that rambling, your daughter is gorgeous and your DH is obviously a very kind and caring daddy for stressing about his little girl so much.

I think there is a real grey line between teaching her self respect in this modern society and letting her be the victim of unnecessary bullying. Bullying is real and relentless. I was bullied for my height so there was nothing anyone could do to help me. It didn't teach me to be proud of who I am as women it made me consider killing myself at the age of 11-12.

Only you will know when or if your daughter needs to change things. All I suggest is don't get too caught up in teaching her huge life lessons beyond her years of comprehension!

I wish we lived in a better society but that's what you have to remember, she does have to 'live' within in it every day.

I hope she has a long and happy life where she never notices her ears.