thread: Not happy with start of Kindy for DD1

  1. #1
    BellyBelly Member

    Sep 2011

    Not happy with start of Kindy for DD1

    DD1 started kindy this year and to say I'm disappointed so far is an understatement.

    DD is very chatty but by no means an overly naughty child, she is a usual 5.5yo.

    I'm not happy with her teacher and I ultimately feel bad that she isn't getting the kindy experience that I thought she would get from a school that I've had so much good feedback about and know SO many people whose kids attend and love it.. I feel like I've put her in the wrong school and she has the wrong teacher and there is nothing i can do about it

    So far this term her teacher has had her put on a level 1 behaviour which essentially meant she went through going on to the "stop sign" to a time out to a time out in another room and a time out in the kindy supervisors room. After this "incident" which came about because of 1) DD was in a reading group and then group were misbehaving, i believe being disruptive to the class so they all got put on the stop sign 2) DD was not doing her maths work and instead was drawing pictures, 3) DD was ignoring direct instructions on several occasions by her teacher. Anyway after a meeting with the kindy supervisor & class teacher I advised that I thought the punishment was a little over the top considering she was only 6 weeks into term 1 of kindy but they did not agree and the decision remained. She even had to do a lunch-time detention.

    Anyway her teacher does not seem to be a very caring sort of person and seems very strict and from what I've heard from other parents has a "low tolerance" in terms of behaviour. DD is chatty and loves to ask questions so I don't know if this is getting on the teachers nerves or what.

    This week we had the Easter hat parade, DD got upset towards the end when i was about to leave and i went and comforted her, it was not a "protesting tantrum" type of upset but a real upset. I ended up taking her back to her teacher who took her from me while she was still crying. I then spotted that i had one of her stuffed animals in the pram so i took it back in to give to her for some comfort and her teacher was standing nearby, I motioned that I was going to give DD the stuffed animal and the teacher then gave me a bit of an eye-roll and came over to tell me that giving it would probably cause more harm than good in the long run. Because of past experiences I did respond instantly quite abruptly that I am her mother and I'm not going to walk away with her being this upset and it's my decision and I am just going to give her the stuffed animal. The teacher walked away and said something which I'm not 100% what was said but it was either a 'whatever' or something along those lines. I gave DD the animal and then left.

    I was annoyed that I'd left DD crying with her teacher and they had obviously just walked her straight over to the class, made her sit down in line and had walked away and left her there crying. When i returned to give her the animal, another teacher was kneeling down with her and was obviously trying to comfort my DD. I feel like her teacher should have been doing that.

    DD has had separation issues, always has had, but I know from how she acts beforehand or how she is acting while she is upset if it's just a protest kind of upset or if she is really really upset. If it's the first then i just leave, but if she is genuinely upset I'll stay and calm her down first. Her teacher for the most part and especially early on would just take DD by the hand and pull her away from me and try to sit her down with the class.

    My initial reaction today was anger that the teacher was trying to tell me what to do with my own child. The teacher has only known my child for 10 weeks whilst also trying to get to know 19 other kids. She is my DD and I will do as I see fit and it's not the teachers place to tell me how to act with her. With the separation issues, in around week 5, the teacher told me "It might be a better idea if you settle her in at the seats with her friends and leave before the bell to avoid her getting upset." Now there is no way that 5 weeks into my first child starting kindy that I'm going to walk her in and leave her by herself to wait for the bell while most of the other kids have their parents, a grandparent or even an older sibbling there with them. Besides the fact I just wouldn't do it, DD would never have let me just leave her there like that anyway. I mentioned this to some other Mum's and they all said "no way" would they do that.

    I guess I'm just after feedback if I'm being over the top. I'm not sure if i should try to discuss the incident today with the teacher or just leave it alone. I don't want to cause more trouble for DD with her teacher by being "a difficult mother" but at the same time her teacher today did not act professionally. I don't expect an "eye-roll" from any teacher of my child. My mum was with me today and wanted me to go straight to the office and complain but I decided to wait till I calmed down first before i did anything but now I'm not sure if i should even raise it as an issue.

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jan 2006

    Re: Not happy with start of Kindy for DD1

    Raise it. While a school child should be doing the activities provided and following most reasonable instructions, she should NOT be given detentions age 5, nor left to cry, nor should her mother be disrespected.

    As for leaving a child alone before the bell... Oh no. No. Just as a safeguarding point, who is responsible if a random adult carries her off?

    I am angry for you too.

  3. #3
    BellyBelly Member

    Sep 2013

    Re: Not happy with start of Kindy for DD1

    You are not being over the top. I'd raise it.

  4. #4
    BellyBelly Member

    May 2007

    Re: Not happy with start of Kindy for DD1

    I would go straight over teachers head and request a meeting with the principal.
    I have done that in the past. You tend to get more time to raise your concerns et .

  5. #5
    Registered User
    Add Khaleesi on Facebook

    Feb 2007

    Re: Not happy with start of Kindy for DD1

    I would goto the principal or vice principal and raise my concerns there.
    I don't think your being over the top at all.