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Thread: All the single ladies! Update time....

  1. #1

    Join Date
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    Default All the single ladies! Update time....

    How is everyone??

    I know we are a quiet lot, but I'm assuming it's because we are all so stuffed. I know I am.

    I'm still bunfighting with xp, but we manage to get it together enough that the kids feel pretty secure, it's not easy though.
    DS is going through an autism/aspergers assessment atm, and is being a right handful at school and at home. Lucky Xp knows how hard it can be and is happy to come and help out during the times I feel like hiding under the bed.
    DD is playing up too, and is doing the "I'm not going to bed" routine each and every night and that is doing my head in.

    Apart from that , I'm plodding along ok, trying to keep up with everything and looking after my mums dog that needs to be medicated twice a day.....like I need more responsibility



    So how are things in your world?

  2. #2

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    Well I am a single lady, but I don't have kids, so don't know if I qualify! But I do will alot of the crappy stuff of life just the same like paying the bills on my own, etc,e tc.
    But I am going, well, I guess I am just going, not much else you can do hey, you can't just make the right man come into your life can you.
    Joined an online match making thing and the first guy I had the courage to 'smile' at disappeared off the thing! Didn't leave me brimming with confidence to do it again

  3. #3

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    I'm doing well Lu - what does bunfighting mean? It sounds a little dirty...

    I'm teaching lots, the kids are clean, fed and clothed! They have finally all hit the age where I can have a lazy day of not getting out of bed and they won't destroy the house, which was tested out quite succesfully yesterday!

    The man front is looking pretty barren (they're all smelly and stoopid anyway) so i'm concentrating on work and the kids and if a bloke comes along then great, if not then stuff it!

    Ausgirl - course you do!

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Mar 2005
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    Hi Lulu

    My DS is being rather difficult lately, similar to your DD, fights bed time every night, begging to sleep in my bed and asking for dummies again 3 weeks after giving them up. He has been super clingy to me, tells me he loves me about 1000 times a day, and if I dont respond and tell him I love him too, he gets all sooky, drives me bonkers! Yes i love you, now shut the heck up! He is majorly favouring me over his Dad, wanting me to make his sandwich/get hima drink etc.

    DH is living in his own house most of the time now which is great, its giving me time to myself to sort myself out and he has finally come to the realisation that his life will not stop without me, he will be ok if we never get back together.

    Those of you who remember Sunday Night Guy, he text me the other night asking if i was interested in getting together when we are sober as he really though I was a nice person and he wants to get to know me a bit better. Of course this threw me into complete confusion again. SNG and I texted each other all night, nothing untoward, just everyday stuff, the convo ended on him saying GL with everything and making your decisions, hope your future will be one I can be a part of...I doubt it, but its nice to know I am wanted LOL

    Counselling has been going great guns, I am so much stronger and more assertive than ever, I rarely let DH manipulate me these days. I am still very undecided on whether I want to be with DH still or be single, foot loose and fancy free....

    Am trying to get enrolled in cert 3 childrens services next semester when DS starts full time kindy, cant wait.


    So that is me in a nut shell

    ausgirl - i did have a little giggle at the guy you liked disappearing off the site, gosh way to knock you down! Keep going girl, Im sure it had nothing to do with you at all x

    CQ - love your attitude to men atm, i wish all women were like that, how strong we would be! woohoo at being ablew to stay in bed with out the house being trashed
    Last edited by widdly; May 16th, 2010 at 02:59 PM.

  5. #5

    Join Date
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    Awesome idea Lulu, great to see you again girls.

    I'm still plodding along, work is crazy, having issues with my council about a fence, and my children are gorgeous. We've lost some teeth, and DS2 is in kindy, so really grown up.

    Men wise, can't really be bothered, have a FWB but can't even be bothered with him atm. Spending my precious little free time on catching up with girlies and working far too hard.

    So that's me in a nutshell!

  6. #6

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    Yay, Div, another strong woman who doesnt need to rely on a man to make her happy, I am working on getting there myself, and actually I sort of am there, thats why Im not all that interested in DH atm...or SNG

  7. #7

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    Hey Ladiesss can i join?
    im single again, i did attempt to enter into a new relationship last week and lets just say i seen his true side on friday and havent looked back since.
    thanks for making this thread its lovely to see you beautiful ladies keeping so strong.
    your all a inspiration and give me something to look forward to. kind of like a light at the end of the tunnel, if i can be half the women you girls are ill be extremly happy!

  8. #8

    Join Date
    Jan 2010
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    I'm here

    Still single, yes there are FWB around, the nDP (not-DP) more around than most (last weekend first weekend in 2 months we've not spent it together). Madly sorting my life out for a move of homes shortly. Spending time catching up with friends.

    Stressing over my gorgeous sister who starts chemo tomorrow & remembering everything that has happened around this time of the year.

    As for children - none yet - but will keep you informed

  9. #9

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    Naaaah, bunfighting is a nicer way of saying poo-fighting....

    We work it out in the end though.

  10. #10

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    Just wanted to pop in and say hi.

    Im a single mum to my gorgeous little 5 year old daughter and have been single since the day after she was born. My ex doesnt have regular contact with our daughter face to face but he calls her most weeks to chat.

  11. #11

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    Hello all!
    I have attempted to be in relationships but it feels weird to have a man in the house and to have someone else playing with the kids.. so i always back out....
    does this happen to everyone else?

  12. #12

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    RR- Yes this has been happening with me also, i got into a relationship with a guy for about max 2 weeks then i just felt weird, we split because i was finding it hard to juggle everything work, oscar and him- he got the $h!ts and told his mates he only 'dated' me as a dare so from now on im staying singleeee! soo much easier

  13. #13

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    I actually had the opposite problem. The guy i was dating for a few weeks earlier this year happily slipped into our routine and i loved that i didnt have to compromise too much of our own life only for HIM to be the one who ended up running scared. After a couple of weeks of excuses i ended up just dumping him.

    I have a strange feeling i will always be single though. I have been on my own for the majority of the last 13 years and now im too settled in my ways and hate having anything disrupt my own routine and times.

  14. #14

    Join Date
    May 2007
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    Well im no longer single...

    but i still feel like i fit in with you in a basis i have been there and done that.

    Im lucky enough to have found a wonderful guy who fits right in with my family, he is amazing and gets along great with my girls. My family love him too...


    as for me, im thinking about work or studying just need to figure out what i want to do.....

  15. #15

    Join Date
    Sep 2004
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    I'm fairly newly single, and learning to settle into it.

    Things with 1st XH are actually quite good. We've been talking and are becoming tentative friends again. He gets married again soon so it's settling into a brother/sister relationship almost, and that's nice, after all the years of drama he's provided me. He has zero influence over me and my life, and the kids we have together are all grown up, so it's not as complicated as it once was.

    Things with my newest XH (god that sounds awful) are still strained on a personal level, but inasfar as the stuff regarding care arrangements, property etc, that couldn't be less difficult. In fact, the settlement of my house (from both of us to just me) is scheduled for the 22nd June. After this point, I will own the house (and the substantial mortgage that goes with it) and all our assets will be split. He's moved into his own place (renting) and has had me over already for visit. I'm hoping that in time, after the financial and other stuff is sorted, we can start to be friends.

    The kids are okay. Charlie took a while to settle, and at one stage was crying for me when he was with his dad, and crying for his dad when he was with me. But the last week has been better - I suppose me going over to his dad's and his dad coming over to mine has made him understand that we're still okay, and he'll be okay too. My older kids, on the other hand, have rallied around me. I've never seen them as much as I have in the last few weeks. They spend almost every weekend at my house, and in exchange for food and alcohol (for the 'legal-age' ones) they help me with the house, and keep me company. I love that I've reconnected with them.

    On the relationship front - no way! Not for a while anyway. I've had a discrete encounter or two, but nothing long term, and definitely nothing I want to be on-going. More for myself, after 9 years in a monogomous realtionship, and at 40 years of age, I wanted to find out whether I am still 'attractive' and that I still have 'it' (IYKWIM), and I have found out that I don't think I actually have the issues on that front that I thought I did .

    I am also very clear from the outset that I'm not looking for commitment, not looking for anyone to come into my kids' or my lives right now, and now having assembled some self-esteem regarding my atttractiveness, I'm pretty much happy to concentrate on my family and myself without any men coming into the picture for a long while, in any capacity. So no, no men or relationships or anything in the horizon, and it's just the way I want it right now.

    So all in all, relatively happy with things. Not necessarily settled or happy per se, but I'm sure I'll get there.
    Last edited by sushee; June 4th, 2010 at 04:06 PM.

  16. #16

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    sushee - it will take time, I know after my last major split, the last thing I wanted was another relationship, now a bit down the track, I'm in the headspace that I'm ready for another one.

  17. #17

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    Hi everyone. Thought I'd join in.
    I've been separated for a few months or so but only now am finding my feet with it all and finally finding the new me.

    xox

  18. #18

    Join Date
    Sep 2008
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    Default Single & pregnant!

    Hi all,
    Thought I'd join in too! Being single is tough in so many ways, but is so liberating at the same time.

    My DD is 20mo & I am pregnant, due 5 days after her 2nd birthday, in October. Her dad is MIA. My ex and I met when DD was 8mo & I fell pregnant around the time we were breaking up. He has always wanted to be a dad and so is keen to be involved, but that comes with its own complications.

    I am enjoying my pregnancy, though it hasn't been as smooth sailing as my first. Thankfully not so much with pregnancy related complications, but tonsillitis, ear infection, colds etc! It has certainly put a strain on me at work as I've had to have so much time off with either my DD being sick, or me!

    Feeling a little anxious about having a newborn and a toddler on my own - any advice appreciated!
    I love being single and independent, despite the hardships that come along with it, it is all worth it in the long run. I'm sure I'll work out new routines juggling the two kids quick smart - I just hope it leaves me with enough energy to exist happily and not be tired, grumpy and irritable all the time!

    It is inspiring reading all of your posts, thankyou!! xx

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