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thread: Probably at the lowest point in my parenting journey

  1. #19
    BellyBelly Member

    Mar 2008
    Kurri Kurri
    1,715

    Hunny I would just be thankful that I had some money that I could take from somewhere. You can always put it back later. I have been in this position and while it might not feel great at least you can provide food for the kids. Tell X to pull his finger out and give back the money he owes you. No excuses. If he still doesn't then tell his family and they can make him pay it back


  2. #20
    2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.
    Add Sunny Love on Facebook

    Apr 2009
    In a place where Love is what we breathe!
    1,070

    I know how bad as a parent you feel for taking from them, but you've done it for survival and to avoid the manipulation (small and large) that can accompany an un-mutual seperation. There's a HUGE difference between that and being selfish.....keep doing what your doing, because it is right for you, and only you has the right to judge-not anyone else. xx

  3. #21
    Thankful for the kindness of my 2012 RAK making me Life member

    Jul 2007
    melb
    8,498

    Hun that does not make you a bad mum it means you are resourceful and thinking of ways around things. You and your kids need to eat so you found money.

    Don't feel bad you are a wonderful mum and your kids will thank you when they are older xoxo

  4. #22
    BellyBelly Member
    Add ~clover~ on Facebook

    Sep 2007
    travelling
    9,557

    I'm not feeling so bad now. Long as I don't look at the bank

    If he ever does give me money, I'll be paying them back & buying myself that bottle of Jimmy I can't afford. May as well enjoy these accusations!

  5. #23
    2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.
    Add Sunny Love on Facebook

    Apr 2009
    In a place where Love is what we breathe!
    1,070

    I'll drink a Jimmy for you AND with you if you stop by Mindarie in Perth!! There's always a bottle saved for emergency-mate situations!!! And a couple of spare kids to keep us busy!!

  6. #24
    Senior Moderator

    Nov 2004
    Chickens.
    4,989

    I've raided my DSs money boxes for 5c pieces to buy milk. DH didn't give a *****.

    You do what you need to do to get by.

    Hugs.

  7. #25

    Jun 2010
    District Twelve
    8,425

    Sorry things are so tough Are you claiming child support from him?

  8. #26
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jan 2006
    11,633

    I'm sorry things are so tough for you.
    But isn't that money there to look after your kids? It's not like you've taken food from their mouths to live it up yourself...

  9. #27
    BellyBelly Member
    Add ~clover~ on Facebook

    Sep 2007
    travelling
    9,557

    Yeah, I'm claiming cs, but he doesn't care. I 'chose the single life'.

    They can't collect either, coz I don't know who he's working for. He works for different contractors year round.

    Sunny09- next time I'm up that way

  10. #28
    BellyBelly Member
    Add purplepixie1978 on Facebook Follow purplepixie1978 On Twitter

    May 2010
    Western Sydney, Australia
    577

    Clover, I'm with everyone else. You have done the best possible thing by your kids in relocating them. Your ex is the issue, not you. You will have time to rebuild their accounts, some day - in the mean time they will have food in their tummies and an awesome Mummy who loves them and is doing an incredible job. Hugs love.

  11. #29
    BellyBelly Life Member - Love all your MCN friends
    Add Gigi on Facebook

    Jun 2004
    The Festival State
    3,008

    bilby got given $10 for xmas, it was assumed i banked it for her, but when i saw that $10 in the envelope, my first thought was "now i can buy bread, milk, butter etc", i felt very low doing that, so i now where you're coming from.

    there seem to be alot of loopholes, to get out of playing Child Support (your ex is a case in point), the system sure needs sorting out.

    i don't know your situation, but i'm reading between the lines, you might have just relocated, getting set up, buying a fridge etc. If my guess is right, setting up a new address is always an expensive thing to do, always messy. If you can survive the anxiety of a big move AND you're keeping your kids fed, clothed and safe in their beds, you're doing well Clover. Anything else is gravy.

    i know, it still sucks. You would have loved NOT to ahve touched their bank accounts, i know hon.

    Sometimes, you have to make choices that are not ideal. You could have chosen not to buy food. I think you made a good choice, out of the choices you had.

    hugs.

  12. #30
    BellyBelly Member
    Add ~clover~ on Facebook

    Sep 2007
    travelling
    9,557

    I know Gigi. SIL gave me a Myer gift card for my birthday recently... I was kinda disappointed I couldn't use it for bread & milk

  13. #31
    Registered User

    Aug 2006
    On the other side of this screen!!!
    11,129

    I've done that. Serially. And I've always paid it back. Abundance comes in waves so when the next wave comes in you'll be able to pay it back, and even add some. Don't feel bad. The hardships you're experiencing at this time are because you're laying the foundation for a better future for your kids. That is something to be proud of.

  14. #32
    BellyBelly Member
    Add Starfish on Facebook

    Apr 2007
    Sydney
    1,759

    I know where you're coming from. I've been there too, and it feels horrible, but sometimes that's just the way things are. Money sux. You're doing the right thing by your kids. It will get better. Hang in there.

  15. #33
    BellyBelly Member

    Nov 2010
    Cairns
    681

    Hope today is a better day for you Clover x

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