IVF and DH works away???

[Amy_jellybean]

Hi lovely ladies,



Im just wondering if there is anyone else out there who is going through IVF anf their DH/DP works away?

We are starting our first cycle next month and im already finding it very difficult not having DH home. We are in a bit of a catch 22 because if he gets a job back in the city then we cant afford to have a baby.

Its so hard sometimes just sitting here on my own thinking about everything and not being able to talk to him about it all, and then we he is home its all we talk about and very draining!

Aim x

[Mildez]

We are in a similar boat. DH works away and other then BB I have no one to talk to about it but its always on my mind and when DH is home thats all we talk about and thats very draining. It really does help to talk about other things for us in times when that is the main topic of conversation and we try and go for weeks at a time without talking about it in any great depth. I think coming into starting IVF its a very anxious time so you can't help but talk about it. I also start soon.
I don't really have any advise except your not alone.

[briggsy's girl]

we went through 7 IUI's and 3 IVF cycles with DH living away from here for work. it wasn't easy at all. but it is doable. you need to be open and talk to him about what you're feeling - if you feel crap, TELL HIM. if you're struggling, TELL HIM. there are some key times he needs to be home obviously - but tehre are some times, if he can be home, it helps - BT day for instance. you either want him there to celebrate (hopefully) or to hug you if needed. DH was only home twice for results day and that was the hardest time for me to cope with him being away

jump into the LTTTC threads and make yourself some friends in there - the support from BB was what kept me sane (well, as sane as i could be).

good luck

BG

[ChristieJ]

I am new to this. Starting IVF this month. Very nervous! My husband also works away so all by myself dealing with this. The last month with did the assessment cycle and I was emotional through that so not looking forward to this! But also excited at the same time!

[Amy_jellybean]

Hi girls,

Thanks so much for your lovely replies, its so nice to know that im not the only one going through this.

ChristieJ - I see that you are also in WA, who are you going through if you dont mind me asking?

Aim x

[ChristieJ]

I am with PIVET in Perth.

[deni]

Amy_jellybean, just thought I'd write to let you know I went through the same thing when I was back home in Perth (now moved to Adelaide for DH's work). It is hard with your partner away but I found it really helpful to talk to my friends and family about the IVF stuff - I know some people prefer to keep it private, but I just felt I needed that extra support when hubbie wasn't home. I also used to stress a lot about the timing issue - ie would his schedule line up with cycle days, but in the end he was able to get time off at the right times so I hope that all works out for you too. Personally for me, I didn't have any noticable side effects from any of the medications (because my body response was so low anyway), but I still found the psychological/emotional aspect of it difficult so having an actual shoulder to lean on (as well as hubbie to talk on the phone if that's possible for you) will help.

I also went with Pivet and as you can see from my sig below our first IVF was a success - so I hope all of you get through this phase with your wits intact and a positive result !

[Wantaminime]

Hi Aim,

I too have a DH who is never home. He is 2 and 1. We actually figured out he is home for 1 out of every three to four ovulations.
It sucks especially seeing as his swimmers hate the cold and don't defrost well so we have to have ICSI.
To be honest I barely cope. He has enough worries at work without worrying about me as well. Part of the problem there is that if I tell him how terrible I am feeling he feels guilty for not being home for me so I tend to make him believe I am fine and everything is wonderful. I also find it is difficult to talk to family and friends about it as well because they really can't understand as most people I know are incredably fertile.
You eventually find a inner strength and just deal with it. I live by the saying what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

I am going thru Concept and find the staff their fantastic. It looks like I am not far from you as well. I am in Orelia

[ChristieJ]

I am an emotional mess and I only just started my injections today! My family doesn't really understand although they try and my poor husband has to put up with me crying on the phone. He won't be here for any of it which I am really struggling with as I really want him to be with me but he must work to pay for this! haha. It certainly makes us stronger.